shut the hell

Anyway, isn’t it so fun to imagine the AU where Dally grew up to be a scammy loverboy with a questionable mustache and not smth (predictably) worse?

HOWEVER I think he’d only consider doing it in a timeline where their parents live. At least then he’d know Sodapop and Ponyboy would still be around to take care of their parents if anything happened to him.

1. Have you ever thought about how Darry is to Soda what Soda is to Ponyboy. Not an exact comparison of course bc their roles and personalities are a little different, but like that’s his one and only cool handsome capable big brother!!! And a lot of things would click into place for Pony once he grows up a little more and realizes that.

2. I know Pony is obviously a charismatic intelligent gorgeous boy who canonically pulls in TWTTIN but just imagine that phase where he’s still not interested in girls while starting to get attention from them. Like the gang hears about a pretty girl asking Pony to hang out after school, but he apparently told her that he already had plans to study for an exam. They assume that was his polite way of rejecting her bc she wasn’t his type or smth, but it quickly becomes apparent that Pony genuinely wanted to focus on studying and he hardly even clocked that she was flirting with him. Which just leads to everyone (fondly) teasing him for being such a nerd. Even Darry’s like god if u weren’t my own flesh and blood I’d have tripped you and taken your lunch money by now.

3. Dally (who lived!) and Sodapop eventually get their GEDs together. Even more heartwarming if they’re partially motivated by Pony having just graduated from college, or it’s a little later in life when the gang has school-aged children to do their homework alongside. Ironically Twobit is the one who never actually graduates or gets his GED even if he’s the one who “enjoys” school the most.

4. Matt Dillon’s Dally changed my life in many ways, one of which being that he added a certain physicality to the character that we didn’t get much of in the book. Bc Matt honey ur so right that Dally would snatch stuff out of your hands and play keep-away, he would put the gang in playful headlocks and pat their backs and ruffle their hair and walk or stand so close that they’re constantly bumping shoulders. Even the tipping over in his chair (which was an accident but charming that they kept it in!) has me thinking he’d use slapstick humor, sometimes at his own expense, when he’s trying to get his friends to laugh.

5. The exact style he’d use would change depending on the time period of whatever AU this gets included in, but I think in general Ponyboy would lowkey be a graffiti-tagging fiend. Except he mostly does fuckass inspirational quotes or quick little doodles. And since it’s Pony we’re talking about he’d also find a way to be polite as he can about it. For instance he’s not terribly interested in trespassing or tagging dangerous/hard to access areas, but that can change depending on his teen angst levels. It’s just funny to imagine the folks of greater Tulsa asking “HOW did that horse doodle get up there” once in a while.

6. Randy and Marcia initially bonded over having medically complex younger siblings who take up a lot of their parents’ time.

7. I know the line in the book is “Maybe Cherry stood still and watched the sun set while she was supposed to be taking the garbage out. Stood there and watched and forgot everything else until her big brother screamed at her to hurry up,” is supposed to be projection on Ponyboy’s part and doesn’t actually confirm that Cherry has an older brother, but I think she actually would have one. He would also be cool and popular which makes her cool and popular by extension. And imagine his name was Laurence which became Larry which became Berry. That and/or it might be cute if she had a little sister whom she loves dearly (nick)named Apple or Clementine.

8. Modern AU Soda would be SO into reality TV. Partially bc their mom was really into it and he was a mama’s boy who would always watch with her, but also Sandy got him into shows like the bachelorette, real housewives, love island, etc. And the gang all clowns on him for being so into it even after he and Sandy break up but when he watches smth on tv in the living room they all end up watching with him. Darry even does the dad thing where he stands right by the TV and swears he’s not watching even though he’s clearly enraptured.

9. Soda and Pony were already sharing a room before the accident and Pony’s nightmares. They took turns climbing into each other’s beds for a while but eventually they just rearranged the room to push their beds together.

10. Modern AU Darry certainly drinks coffee but he’s also a sugar-free redbull kind of guy. Soda makes those heinously decadent and sweet iced coffees with a caramel drizzle inside the cup and sugar cookie creamer and whipped cream with a mocha drizzle just for it to be DECAF. And in my previous hc list I said Pony would be addicted to energy drinks, which I still believe, but also hard agree with all the takes I’ve seen about him being a performative matcha male. Except he genuinely does like matcha for its grassy qualities.

11. Steve, Soda, and Dally invented a game called “Would you know where you were at if you were kidnapped,” a name they refuse to shorten bc they think saying the whole thing every time is funnier, where someone gets blindfolded and the other person drives them around for a bit. Then the blindfolded person has to guess where in town they are. Of course they’d also try to trick each other by taking unnecessary turns or backing up for extended periods and the like. Pony and Johnny don’t like being the ones blindfolded but they’ll ride along sometimes bc it’s funny how competitive it can get. When Twobit plays and he’s the one blindfolded he’ll randomly practice his high-pitched screams of terror, usually when they’re waiting at a light or smth. The looks they get from passersby on the street are golden.

12. Soda may not care about sports but jock Soda is such a fun concept. An unconventional jock as well! Like he’d be the only male cheerleader. Or I think he might even do well on a men’s volleyball team. And he and Steve are so That Duo on the baseball team.

13. This is prob an extremely common take but just saying I concur about band kid Johnny and theater kid Pony.

14. White guy Dally with his long pale blond hair and whitewalker blue eyes, who keep in mind has been rodeoing out in the OK sun all summer, would unintentionally give surfer vibes with how tan he’d get and I don’t think we appreciate that image enough

15. Doesn’t necessarily have to be modern AU, but imagine being able to tell whenever someone in the gang got ahold of a box of hair dye or smth bc like three of them will suddenly be going around with bleached bangs or colored streaks in their hair.

16. Darry acts all embarrassed about it but he lowkey loves when old ladies stop him while he’s out in public with his bros just so they can tell him what handsome/charming/hardworking/well-behaved young men they are.

17. I can’t find the post rn but I saw someone recently talking about MILF hunter Dally. Not only is that the funniest thing ever, but I agree AND I raise you MILF hunter Steve as well (if he weren’t so committed to Evie ofc)

18. Johnny, had he the space and funds, would like to keep a reptile as a pet. Bearded dragon or a snake, maybe. The gang starts a rumor that he keeps his snake hidden in his jacket so that Socs will think twice about messing with him.

19. Whenever Tim AND Curly sleep over at the Curtis house on the couch it’s so goofy and heartwarming to see how they lay with their heads on opposite sides with their legs stacked in the middle. Especially after Curly grows taller than Tim.