Alone and Home

tim drake’s snapchat is 90% him making bruce wayne do normal middle-class american things and filming the results. popular youtube compilations include the one where they’re at denny’s at two in the morning and tim keeps trying to get bruce to order a moon over my hammy just so he’ll have to say it, the one where they’re at disneyworld and bruce gets increasingly frazzled culminating in him actually physically picking up gaston for reasons no one can entirely recall, and everyone’s favorite series “bruce wayne doesn’t understand walmart”

having thought about it the best part is probably when a pranking fails because bruce has such a bizarre patchwork of knowledge/skills and it does not occur to him to hide most of it. tim puts a ghost pepper in bruce’s food but bruce just eats it like nothing is wrong. the same thing happens with the chocolate-covered crickets. it turns out bruce can lick his own elbow. bruce can lasso a runaway robot lawnmower like it’s a calf at a rodeo. whenever tim expresses shock that bruce knows how to do something he says “i did go to college, tim” as if that explains anything and it becomes a meme. whenever anyone does something fucking absurd it just gets tagged “i did go to college, tim”.

God this just makes me think of the thing in Hamlet where of course  the person best suited to talk to spirits is the one who went to school.

I like snickers and whoppers…,

I feel attacked and triggered

Fix ya life

I can’t believe someone could just lie like this

I know people out here lying about liking Snickers like what…?

My mom said we can’t be friends anymore

three musketeers is life wyd

It’s poopy Milky Way

I cosign this post.

snickers are amazing take that off the list

Snickers taste like mush.

This is just disrespectful

It’s factual. Can we just burn all traces of 3 musketeers? Who is eating those? No one enjoys them.

I see no lies.

Where’s the gif of NeYo in the huge pants lifting the girl up

I’m screeeaaaaming ty krimdellakrim

💀💀💀💀💀💀 why tf is he in those 😭😭😭

This nigga would’ve never laid a hand on me wearing them big ol pants 😭😭😭😭😭

The real question is if he’s in the left pant leg or the right pant leg #JeansusChrist #JeanyInABottle #SippinOnJeanAndJuice #AkonAndYoungJeanzy #BillieJean

Why they so stiff tho.

naps are the worst kind of temptation.. they promise u rest and wellness but leave you with a cloudy headache and an inescapable drowsiness the rest of the day

i honestly am tired of constantly telling myself “just get through this week and everything will be ok” like !!! i want everything to be ok 24/7 365 100% of the time im TIRED!!!!!!! 

I’m on medication that can make me spacey af, which can be a problem when I’m driving–like yesterday, for example, when my best friend was trying to help me avoid a pothole he said “to the left,” and I just mumbled “take it back now y'all” and hit the pothole straight on

Literally crying

this is my favorite post on this website

started from the bottom and i am currently still at the bottom

“but being abused made you so kind!” being abused made me terrified of being anything less than perfectly accommodating and pleasing in an effort to protect myself from the violence my abuser reacted with but okay whatever

apparently modern medieval scholars have no solid idea why there’s so many old paintings of knights fighting snails.  Like that wasn’t just one weird painting there’s hundreds of those.  

the firste meyme

I’m not saying humanity defeated an invasion of snail aliens in the Middle Ages but hold on wait that’s EXACTLY what I’m saying

snail aliens, or snaliens,

probably it was just funny so people kept doing it. which is basically what a meme is

the explanation I’ve heard is that most of the monks who did these illustrations would have kept small gardens where they grew all their own food and this was their way of venting about snails ruining their gardens

ok thats even funnier