mmm toxic slutch

ooo…. lady gagita

if anyone needs me i’ll be alone in my tower

Went to Aldi today and there were three checkout counters open and all of them were staffed with people with identical body types and identical nose rings and identical short beards and identical manbuns

When I got in line there was one counter open and the line was huge so they opened a couple more while I waited so it was like copies of The Checkout Guy just kept coming out of the stockroom to duplicate his efforts

There was also an old woman in there, maybe 80 or 90 years old, and her phone went off and it was the Crazy Frog ringtone. Not the original ringtone. The song version.

#sims 4 ass life

When i met u in the summer

who else COLD tonight

If you remember being a teenager you're a creep because you straight up saw yourself naked back then. The only way to be righteous is to obliterate your mind with drugs until you can't remember anything

And like who the fuck is this guy [gestures to reflection in mirror alone in bathroom

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

yeah I know I burned the fuckk out of that bridge but in my defense how else was i supposed to light my way