c. sea.

I’m down to my last two weeks in Seattle. I have a lot of mixed feelings. Part of me is relieved to leave the rain and cold and all the rude ass racist white people. Hawaii is my home and it is the place that I feel I can be comfortable being myself. But I will miss my students and my friends who have become family. I’m not really sure yet how I will survive without HR’s presence in my life. I start to cry whenever I think about it so I try to avoid it but I need to confront it because that shit is real. I’ll miss the green (various types) and the foods of the NW. I’m scared af of the mess I’m going home to in my family. Things are bad. Which means I am needed more than ever. I have spent this summer thinking, feeling, getting a handle on my addiction to my phone, spending time alone, recovering, and trying to be the best and healthiest and strongest self I can be for my move.