Duck Nipple

Constantly torn between “I can’t ask for help bc then I’m annoying and everyone will be mad” and “I must ask for help at every possible stage because I might do it wrong and then everyone will be mad” ya feel

my dad bought honey. but did not get the one shaped like a sweet little bear. why do men rob me of the few chances of true joy in my life.

I get road rage walking behind people.

we all deserve a “did you eat” person in our lives

daydreaming on public transportation just hit different

romance is dead except for whatever captain america and that metal armed guy have going on

I love the kind of tired that comes from a lot of fresh air and a little too much sun

my mom calls it “sundrunk”

white boys be like “im gonna make you come so hard” and ur like, what to my senses

every time i see this i’m thrown into hysterics because for some reason i NEVER anticipate the ending of this sentence

can u believe harry styles just invented water, blue suits, bisexuality, music, orgies, motorcycles, riding motorcycles backwards, lyricism, AND getting arrested? what a fucking entrepreneur

i just have this persistent feeling of “i’m not doing enough” combined with “i don’t have the energy to do anything” and it just really fucking sucks