Do what I Say, Not what I Do

“Right. Second.”

“I’m not gonna chicken out of this one, let me tell you.”

“Good, It’ll be an experience to one day tell people about. Though just a warning apparently most people think it’s weird, and I still don’t get why.”

“Maybe I should just take your word for it? After this would be your, what, third?”

“Second.  And fine, but if you change your mind let me know.”

“Veruca deserved it. She’s the second worst character in the whole thing, right after Mike.”

“Veruca did not.  She’s just misunderstood and her Dad spoiled her to the point she didn’t know what was right and wrong.”

“Never in my life did I expect to hear my ex girlfriend try to convince me to go with her to an orgy…”

“What? You like guys, I like people.  It’ll be a fun time.”

“You know… it could be fun. I haven’t actually been to one so I have no idea what to expect. I was just told that if I do go, bring goggles or something.”

“Riiiiiiiiiiiiight, forgot that you haven’t been to an orgy. You know we should really fix that sometime.”

“It’s nice to meet you Carys, at least…. I think it’s nice. That’s not the usual introduction for sure. I’m Peter Lyons.”

“Of course it’s not.  I hate doing the usual thing.  That’s like the last way to get noticed.”

“I don’t know about beaches, but I know plenty of parties that provide that option.”

“Well then why don’t we just hit up one of those? It’ll be fun.”

“I can appreciate that. Though I didn’t know if you were talking about a clothing optional beach or not, because I think that falls under “sexy beach” as well.”

“Well obviously that’s preferred, but I don’t know if there are any of those in New York.”

“Define a sexy people beach…?”

“You know the kind where we can both admire the fact that all the guys have six packs and there’s always a party going on.”

Peter couldn’t help but take a step back in shock. “I wish I could still say that… Wow… Okay… Thanks.”

“You’re welcome,” Carys smiled innocently at him, as she slipped her shirt back up, “I’m Carys Ramirez.  It’s nice to meet you.”

“Oh.. well then…” Peter replied, trying not to look down at the woman’s chest. “I can’t say that I looked at them or… yeah?”

“Seriously?” Carys asked as she slipped out of the straps of her tank top and flashed him with a smirk, “Can’t say that now can you?”

Fletcher chuckled as he looked at his phone, scrolling through his instagram feed. “Everyone’s on the beach getting burnt alive while we’re here, sweating our asses off onstage. I can’t decide which I’d rather do…”

“It depends.  Is this a sexy people beach or is it a beach where everyone brings their annoying kids, because those are two completely different experiences.”

“What? The one decent guy on Tinder and you blocked him? What did he do to you?”

“He was decent and nice and had didn’t even look at my boobs once.  And I dated a gay guy before and even he looked at these gifts to the world.”

“I’m guessing that’s the opposite of what you wanted then? If it is, feel free to send him my way.”

“See I deleted his number and blocked his name from my memory, otherwise I would have. I’ll keep that in mind if that happens again.”

“Only sluttier.” 

“Of course. She’s only 12.  It’d be gross if that was the case.  This is a children’s show, even if I do get murdered by giant ballet-dancing squirrels.”

“This is why I love you, at least you have class.”

“More like I just know what I want.  I relate to Veruca in that way.”

“You’re a weirdo. You could end up being tied up in some basement and not in the fun way.”

“Who in New York City can actually afford to have a basement?  I’d be willing to be tied up if he had that kind of money.”