louder than ever

If you get put into rehab, I’ll be here everyday, helping you through it. I’ll get my visa extended, I don’t care. [Lorena promised, leaning her forehead against Max’s.]

N-no. I don't want to be stuck here. I-I'm sorry, I'll do anything, j-just please. I wanna go home.. [Max started to cry, curling her body into Lorena's.]

Max shook her head frantically before throwing up again; she could feel her lips turning blue as her throat refused to open. She insisted to the nurses that she could be without the oxygen, not exactly knowing what she needed it for, until now. "I c-...I ca-..." she wheezed, desperately reaching for the red emergency button on the side of her bed.

"I'm making jokes because if I didn't I'd go fucking crazy!! Am I just supposed to sit here and wallow in how much I fucking HATE myself?! You have no idea the guilt and the weight that sits on my chest every goddamn day!! Do you actually think I find this funny? I've been in so much pain my entire life, and I have been fucked up for a long time, and the fact that my heart stopped doesn't make this any fucking easier!! I can't just flip a fucking switch and be okay, no matter how hard you pound it into my head!! It doesn't work like that!!" Max was completely breathless when she stopped talking, and almost immediately turned to lean over the side of her bed, throwing up into the waste-basket, choking on the air she was trying to pull into her lungs.

When Marya started to speak, it immediately sounded like a lecture that made Max feel so much smaller than she already did. Every word made her feel worse; she even started to feel sick to her stomach, which was most likely a result of the medication they were giving her--the reason they put her to sleep in the first place, so she didn't have to endure the feeling. "Wh-why are you doing this..?" she whimpered, tears now streaming down her cheeks. "I know what I did, okay? I hurt everyone who cares about me, I know that. Just...pl-please...please stop.." Max slowly brought her hands to her face to hide herself as she cried.

"Ew stop before I lose my venti mocha frap." She shuddered. "These details would have been fine if she was not your girlfriend and able to walk through that door any second. Last thing I need is to look at a teacher that way if I know them personally. Ew. This is why i am so glad I have my books and social media. To cleanse my innocent soul of all the dirty sins you do." She teased before pulling out her phone and going through her own photos. "Hm. Only dirty picture I have of me is one and it was a wet t-shirt contest back home. I’d say I am on a pretty good streak here compared to you."

"Fuck you. I think you're jealous. However if she walked in here right not, I would more than likely bust out laughing." Max raised her eyebrow and gave Savannah her greatest puppy dog eyes, and since she was sick, they were twice as more effective. "I think I deserve to see this picture after all the pain I just let you put yourself through."

"I’m fine, Max. You’re up and going to get better—that’s all that matters to me. It’s… it’s okay. Prom is just one little thing. We can dance anywhere. Anytime. I’d trade a million proms if it meant you were okay." Delilah shifted. "You should probably lay back down…"

"I know. I just...wanted to dance with you in front of everyone else. I'm gonna make it up to you, littlefoot. I promise." Max said softly before pecking Delilah's cheek. Despite her need to move around, she surrendered to her exhaustion and returned to her pillow. "I've been laying down for a whole day, apparently.."

Savannah rolled her eyes,”Oh right cause it is so scandalous for couples to exchange nudes and borderline porn photos. You’re the one living on the wild side. Thankfully I have never done such poses or pictures. Someone has to be the classy one out of the two of us.” She sat in the chair again and smiled,”But boy am I lucky I have photographic memory.”

"Wait, borderline porn? Oh good, you didn't go that far.. We don’t even exchange them. We lay there and look at them and talk about how hot we are and then have sex again." she laughed again, shrugging her shoulder at Savannah. "We totally are, though." Max groaned and fell back into her pillow, "I believe that’s what one would call a spank bank. Too bad you’ll never hear her in bed. She makes me wish I actually paid attention in spanish.."

Savannah smirked and stuck her tongue out at Max before curling up in a chair and swiping through the photos. They held nothing back from what she could see. But Savannah kept a neutral serene smile to her face to give nothing away. It was almost as if they were screen shotting pictures from videos they took of themselves. And then Savannah wondered if there were even those. But from what she could see, it was mostly photos. Finally when she got through all the photos, she moved from the chair and smirked at Max as she handed her phone back over. “I think that this is where I take my leave Jake. You’ve been on a lot more adventures than I thought.” She winked.

Max absolutely hated it when Savannah smiled like that. That 'I'm about to ruin your life' smirk. Rolling her eyes, she sat back, thinking she might as well. "You better never say a goddamn word about any of that to anyone ever, you hear me?" she said with a pout, snatching her phone back , though she was a little proud of Savannah's reaction. "Yeah, we aren't exactly the uh...tamest couple around.."

"That wasn’t the word I was thinking but yeah. That works too." She grinned, looking at the picture closely. "Okay it’s real. Just making sure it wasn’t photoshopped or anything." She teased before snatching her phone and hopping out of the bed to a safe distance. "But shall we see if miss dance teacher went wild for our little Max Carter?" She grinned mischievously as she tapped her nails on her phone before starting to slide to search through her photos.

"Hey!!" Max wasn't expecting Savannah to swipe her phone and bounce across the room, obviously where Max couldn't reach her. Wild was a bit of an understatement. "Sav, you really really shouldn't do that. I mean it.." she said cautiously. Not only were there pictures of her and Lorena separately, but there were even more of them together--like, very together.

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Savannah was in the middle of laughing when the dots finally connected in her mind. Stopping mid laugh, she stared at Max with wide and non-believing eyes for a moment before bursting into louder laughter again. “Oh. My. God! You are shagging the dance teacher! Holy shit! Damn. Look at you snagging a teacher and a hot Colombian one at that. A pretty good graduation present I’d say. Wait…..you not fucking with me are you?” She arched a brow skeptically at Max.

Max blushed and covered her face with her hands as Savannah gushed. "You are so fucking embarrassing!" she shrieked, sighing languidly. Reaching across her friend, she grabbed her phone and pulled up a picture of the two of them onto the beach, scrolling to another one of them kissing. "We're fuckin' cute, right?"

"You… you wanted to go to prom? With me?" Though it was the last thing that should’ve been being questioned at the moment, it was the words that slipped out of her mouth. Her arms tentatively returned the hug and before long, she was squeezing her with gentle intensity. And for a moment, Delilah contemplated how odd the situation was, and how their roles had seemed to reverse. Months ago, Max had been the one anchoring Lilah. And now… now Lilah had to try and anchor Max back. "R-really? Oh. Um… o-okay. I… I haven’t been to our dorm since…" Delilah trailed off, closing her eyes. Max didn’t need to hear about that, nor did she need to hear how Delilah hadn’t slept or ate anything since the accident. Every time she so much as thought about food, she felt as if she may throw up. And sleeping… sleeping had been entirely out of the question. She had relied on water, mostly. Water to keep her going just long enough for Max to go along side her once more. "Yeah… yeah. Okay."

"Yeah, I did. I really did. But now-...now we're here.. I wanted it to be perfect. I'm so sorry.." Max didn't want to let go of Delilah. She wanted to hang on to her and not let her go, no matter what. Then she would be okay. "You're so tired, sweetheart.."

"Back the fuck up Jake it is so not! Reading and role playing so different I should shank your ass just for saying that. And, uh, hello how do you think I get free comic books you dill hole." She rolled her eyes before sighing and grinning,"Yeah I’ve seen that dance teacher. And the puddle of drool her students leave when class was over. Why what about her. Don’t tell me you had the hots for her too."

"Well je-sus christ sor-ry, psycho." With a smirk, Max poked at Savannah's boobs and giggled. "These are how, obviously." She had to try hard to not laugh as she continued about her relationship. Her friend's mind was on the wrong track, and for some reason it was completely amusing. "You asked who my girlfriend was, didn't you?"