liam

[dm lucyhale] Sometimes I think that'd make everyone's lives easier. I'm a problem to everyone.

[DM lucyhale] ill be fine

[DM lucyhale] why?

[DM lucyhale] thats what I keep hoping but its been so long. He won't even talk to me anymore. So to numb the pain I drink. I started taking pills again. Been thinking about getting back into other things as well.

[DM lucyhale] we've broken up before and gotten back together. I thought thats what this would be but now we're divorced. I dont know what to do with myself most of the time now.

[DM lucyhale] we started out as coworkers that started hooking up but I knew after the first time there was something there

[DM lucyhale] I dont think i will. It was rare with him. I messed it all up and ruined it.

[DM lucyhale] in my whole life I have never been happier than when it was just him and I goofing off or watching something or not really watching it at all. He was my best friend.

[DM lucyhale] I havent found anything else that does.

[DM lucyhale] it makes me feel better in the moment. In general Im always miserable

[DM lucyhale:] It relaxed me and I felt better. Not like I have anyone at home who gives a shit what I do

[Text] Being at the bar and drinking was the bad decision. Im not supposed to drink.

[DM lucyhale: i dont make the best decisions when left to mg own devices

[dm lucyhale] I guess I don't. For a long time I had someone to pull the reigns in a little. Now I'm left to my own devices and I can do whatever I want whenever I want

[DM lucyhale] one of those? What does that mean?

[DM lucyhale] what's your favorite thjf about the beach?

[DM lucyhale] the beach sounds nice.