making monsters.

                         “    that's    big    talk,    real    big    talk    .    but    we'll    see    who's    got    the    last    laugh    when    wifey's    luggin'    your    sorry    ass    back    home    .    ”    taking    space    in    passenger    seat,    he    makes    himself    comfortable,    reaches    to    settle    new    port    between    lips    and    light    .    “    'ya    don't    mind    that    i    smoke    in    here,    right    ?    well,    shit    .    you'd    be    shit    outta    luck    if    'ya    did,    considering    the    bar    we're    goin'    to    s'got    the    name    cigar    in    it    .    guess    we    can    sit    out    on    the    patio    section    or    somethin',    smell    shouldn't    linger    too    bad    .    ”    has    courtesy    enough    to    roll    down    designated    window    to    allow    for    fresh    air    to    circulate,    though    not    near    enough    to    blow    a    cloud    out    of    it    .    “    let's    make    it    a    bet    then,    eh    .    like    how    we    used    to    when    we    were    kids    .    first    one    plastered,    owes    the    other    one    a    hundred    bucks    and    takes    care    of    the    tab,    whattya    say    ?    ”

"s'pose we will, won't we?" seth knew what that actually meant... he would be picking up drew off the floor and throwing him into the back of the truck before the night was through. but so what? every once in a while, maybe he could find it in his heart to allow it. even if it ended up that suni was going to have to deal with the both of them. snorting, he interjected with his hand instead of words, ripping the cigar right out from between his lips and tossing it. maybe not the best practice environmentally, but he was making a statement! "you can smoke when we get there an' not a moment before. not in my truck an' not even in yours. it'll ruin the leather. y'know how expensive it was?" shaking his head, he continued, "it wouldn't kill ya to take care of your things now an' again, y'know." but it was also easier to be caught up in a bet than it was in any kind of teaching moment. especially because he saw an easy way to get the money for whatever damages drew caused. "sure thing. i just hope you're prepared to pay up," he said, pulling into the parking lot.

                             “    what    did    you    think    was    going    to    happen    ?     if    i    wanted    someone    to    just    stand    there,     i    would    have    just    brought    my    sister    .     stop    complaining    and    get    down    here    .    ”     he    busies    himself    with    lacing    up    his    skates,     flinging    the    duffel    that    contained    the    pair    dedicated    for    seth    .     “    here,     suni    told    me    to    get    you    a    set    if    you    were    going    to    be    helping    me    out    .     they    should    fit    .     if    not,     we'll    figure    something    else    out    .     anyways,     i    need    you    to    sit    legs    out    in    front    of    me    and    hold    my    wrists    .     pull    me    slowly    and    gently,     until    my    chest    lays    flat    on    the    floor    .     let's    go,     the    sooner    we    start,     the    sooner    we    finish    .    ”

with the pair of skates shoved into his arms, seth could only stare wide-eyed, in pure disbelief of what was being asked of him. "but i don't—" it was difficult to get a word in edgewise. how was he going to help anyone when he'd never been out on ice before? let alone in skates, roller or other variety. "i don't know how t'skate. i won't be any help to you out there!" he insisted, desperate to get out of this part of the arrangement. helping canon wasn't supposed to give him a concussion, too! "i'll look like an idiot. how's that s'pose to help you?"

                         “    your    temper    is    out    of    control,    danior    .    like    a    hormonal    teenager    marking    his    territory,    it    isn't    attractive    .    not    everyone    is    out    to    snatch    me    away    from    you;    let's    please    stop    behaving    as    though    it    were    the    case    .    ”    hand    drops    placatingly    to    his    chest,    urging    him    back    towards    the    empty    mass    room    .    “    you    promised    me    that    you'd    act    correctly    this    time    .    my    dad    nearly    had    security    drag    you    out    of    service    the    last    time    we    were    here    .    i    just    want    a    peaceful    sunday,    which    means,    absolutely    no    fooling    around    .    under    any    circumstances,    i    don't    care    how    bored    you    get    .    ”

"my temper is perfectly in control," he assuaged her, running his fingertip over the mark he'd just given her on her bare throat. she could have brought a scarf if she was really feeling embarrassed about it. he knew that she was just posturing, pretending to be the perfect church girl—meanwhile helpless to his corrupting influence. she even sent him back toward the main hall, empty as of yet. "you worry too much. relax, okay? or i'm gonna make you relax myself," he warned, leaning in to nose at her neck. the doors fell shut with a loud thud, echoing throughout the empty pews with enough force to stir up some lingering dust. "i promise, okay? i'll be nothing but serious."

                             “    here,    ”    shoving    controller    into    his    hands,    he    situates    himself    beside    his    new    quote    on    quote    friend    .    “    i'll    walk    you    through    how    to    play    while    we    wait    .    i'm    sure    my    .    .    .    friend,    ”    issei    cringes    at    how    forced    the    term    comes    out    but    pushes    on    nonetheless    .    it    was    time    to    get    back    at    the    eldest    shaw    for    all    his    bullshit,    and    what    better    way    than    using    abel,    his    polar    opposite    .    “    ehrm,    friend,    ought    be    showing    up    soon    .    i'm    sure    you'll    both    absolutely    hit    it    off    with    one    another    .    ”

shoving through the door, ezra was half through something snarky when he caught side of his younger brother. oh, fuck! in an instant, all the cheer ( snide or otherwise ) in his expression is gone and replaced with a deep scowl. "oh bloody hell!" crossing his arms over his chest, he regards the pair coldly. "you didn't tell me you invited guests. might have been nice to give me a heads up before subjecting me to my own fucking family, mate." combing his fingers roughly through his hair, ezra turns to cool his temper. not that it works. glaring over his shoulder, he doesn't bother to address abel at all. "you really are serious about this suicide mission, aren't you? begging me to kill you. i would, too... if you didn't go and grab the one person that won't let me!"

                           “     what     is     there     to     figure     out     ?     me     taking     a     liking     to     you     isn't     good     enough     or     what     ?     ”     wasn't     their     entire     relationship     built     around     the     notion     of     them     having     leeway     with     commitment     ?     why     romero     chose     now     to     start     fanning     the     flames     was     beyond     her     .      “     come     join     me     and     let     it     go,     will     you     ━━     for     me     .     quit     chasing     useless     questions     .     people     here     question     us     enough     about     what     we     are;     there     isn't     a     need     for     you     to     join     in     with     them     .     what     we     have     is     none     of     their     business     .     it     makes     us     happy     and     that's     that     .     .     .     you     are     happy,     right     ?     ”     hand     tousles     through     his     locks     as     she     adjusts     to     hold     him     to     her     chest,     pressing     a     kiss     to     his     temple     as     she     questions     him     .

for a long moment, he falls silent, twirling a lock of her hair between his fingers. "you're right. i guess i just worry too much, that's all," he jokes, but only half. it's hard not to think of all the disapproval he might meet if he brought her to meet his family. but who would they have accepted? nothing and no one. rome had long since learned that the problem rested more with him than it did with whoever he was with, but the fear persisted. maybe that was childish. he would have been better off following his heart... rather than his nervous mind. "i am happy," he admits, taking her other hand in his. "maybe that's the problem. is that dumb? i'm not used to it."

                             “     seth,     baby,     don't     take     this     wrong     way     but     i'm     so     sick     of     hearing     about     my     brother     from     you     .     it's     wonderful     that     he's     dialed     back     on     being     the     brat     that     he     is     and     you     two     are     getting     along,     i'm     not     griping     .     but     my     back     is     killing     me,     my     feet     are     swollen     and     sore     ━━ i've     been     struggling     to     so     much     as     waddle     around     our     home     .     the     last     thing     i     want     to     hear     is     how     you     think     he's     contracted     a     ghost     sickness     that     you     had     years     ago     or     that     he's     been     possessed     by     some     other     supernatural     creature     .     ”     she     uses     his     shoulder     to     help     maneuver     herself     to     rest     heavily     against     it's     arm,     legs     going     up     to     rest     across     what     remains     of     the     space     .     “     did     you     try     talking     with     him     ?     ask     what's     going     on     ?     that'd     be     a     strong     start     .     ”

opening and closing his mouth, seth eventually chose to consider her position with pursed lips. suni, as per usual, had a perfectly good point... if he was lobbying a normal complaint. he tried not to make it a big deal whenever canon did something stupid, or insensitive, or reckless, or self-centered, or any number of other things... the problem was the sheer magnitude of it all. and more importantly, how it had all but stopped! "look... that's the whole problem. i don't have much of nothin' t'complain about! he's completely flipped. overnight. s'weird, is what it is. and it reminds me of when i had that problem, myself..." scratching at the nap of his neck, he added, "i doubt he'd talk t'me anyway..."

                             exhausting     .     all     of     this     is     so     incredibly     exhausting     .     playing     nice,     the     ebbing     nervousness     of     rapidly     approaching     comeback,     adding     weapons     to     an     already     over     stocked     arsenal     just     to     maintain     the     sliver     of     an     upper     hand     that     he's     got     .     just     ━━     exhausting     .     what     had     once     brought     him     a     spark     to     bleakness,     now     ate     at     him     .     poked     and     probed     until     it     left     him     raw     and     bleeding     .     canon's     internal     spiral     is     interrupted     by     the     other's     reply,     head     snapping     to     offer     a     glazed     expression     and     knitted     brows     .     “     we've     got     staff     for     ━━     err     .     .     .     sure,     whatever     .     i'll     help     clean     .     but     let     me     ask     another     favor     .     .     .     you     drive     me     for     the     rest     of     the     week,     at     least     until     my     usual     driver     is     back     from     leave     .     ”     ultimatium     is     offered     as     he     fastens     into     the     passenger     seat,     slipping     headphones     over     ears     before     seth's     got     the     chance     to     respond     .     he's     got     to     focus     .     clear     his     thoughts     and     make     the     most     of     what's     left     before     he's     thrust     back     under     a     microscope     that's     posed     as     a     spotlight     .     moment     they're     at     the     outer     barriers     of     rink,     he     begins     the     motions     of     warm     -     up     .     slinking     down     to     start     stretching,     arms     outstretched     as     he     gives     the     other     an     expectant     look     .     “     what're     you     waiting     for,     get     down     here     and     start     helping     me     warm     -     up     .     you     think     suni     just     stands     there     all     dumbfounded     ?     you're     here     to     work     not     stand     there     with     your     thumb     up     your     ass     .     ”

grumbling his acceptance, seth slips into the driver's seat and rolls the car out onto the road. the fact that he's offered a demand more than a plea is just enough like the normal canon that he isn't entirely put off by the whole thing. but he's still mostly put off... since when has anything between them been more than something of tolerance? please and thank you have never been in his vocabulary before. he's asking like a madman, someone too in the grips of anxiety to behave like themselves... suspiciously, he doesn't want to dare think, like he had acted in the throes of ghost sickness. warming up isn't what he expects, either. brows shooting up, seth has no choice but to offer back a, "come again?" there had been absolutely no warning about this in their ( admittedly brief ) conversation! "you want me to go out there with you an'... skate?" a huff of amusement escapes him. "didn't say nothin' about that back home. i've never done it before... doubt i'll be any help."

                         “     yes,     jumped     .     i     don't     see     what's     so     damn     funny     'bout     it     neither,     not     even     our     folks     put     me     in     a     corner     .     i'd     rather     have     had     my     lights     knocked     out     'stead     of     bein'     publicly     humiliated     like     that     .     ”     he's     joking,     of     course     .     mostly     at     least     .     fit     as     she     is,     his     sister-in-law     knocking     him     out     cold     was     about     as     likely     as     pigs     sprouting     wings     and     flying     .     “     won't     be     startin'     anymore     losin'     battles,     that's     for     damn     sure     .     at     least     not     with     her     —     the     ankle     biters,     on     the     other     hand     .     .     .     well,     if     any     of     their     favorite     little     toys     come     up     missin',     i'm     keepin'     my     mouth     shut.     ”     the     heavy     hand     to     his     shoulder     does     cause     him     to     stumble     slightly,     but     drew     still     cracks     a     grin     over     at     seth     .     “     fuck     off,     it     ain't     no     pity     party     .     we're     gonna     watch     the     game     at     my     favorite     bar,     toss     back     some     good     beer,     and     just     let     loose     .     see     if     you     can     still     drink     me     under     the     table     or     if     fatherhood's     made     'ya     soft     .     ”

"what's funny 'bout it is y'weren't jumped. a couple'a kids and my wife don't count." he can only imagine the whining that will ensue once his own are running around. no doubt that drew will make just as much trouble with them as he does everyone else. funny, how age never seems to matter... it feels sometimes that he's working with a child instead of his baby brother! maybe he's just not emphasizing the baby part enough... at least he still has adulthood in a few places. his id, for starters. he would hate to have to vouch. "alright, but i'm drivin'. no damn way i'm lettin' you wreck my car. hell, who am i kidding? you'll be passed out before we even leave the bar. bet y'won't even make it through the game!"

                             being     dubbed     ‘     pal     ’     is     nearly     enough     to     break     the     kindness     streak     he's     on,     but     he     perseveres     nonetheless     .     only     to     immediately     match     seth's     expression     with     one     of     his     own     .     “     what     the     hell     are     you     looking     like     that     for,     ah     ?     i     can't     offer     an     olive     branch     of     peace,     or     what     ?     and     there     isn't     a     catch     ━━     i     just     needed     help,     like     i     said     .     ”     he     snatches     duffel     bag     off     the     kitchen     island     as     he     yaps,     shuffling     behind     the     other's     towering     frame     .     “     of     course,     i     expect     ━━     ”     what     was     that     about     him     and     a     streak     of     kindness     ?     “     ehm,     sorry     .     i'd     appreciate     it     if     you     did     drive,     is     what     i     meant     .     now     could     we     go     already     ?     i'd     like     to     be     warming     up     already     before     nine     in     the     morning,     we'll     stop     to     pick     dinner     up     once     i've     finished     .     that     way,     you     don't     have     my     sister     on     her     feet     worrying     about     what     you're     going     to     stuff     your     face     with     .     ”

finally, there was a spark of normalcy between them. canon snapped about his expression ( as he should have before now, if they went by their usual interactions ) and even though he was quick to stop and withdraw the comment... it had still broken through. that meant there probably wasn't anything truly bizarre at play... although what else it could be still ate away at him. it must have been serious to have him playing nice like that. just needed help wouldn't cut it as an explanation. after all, canon had needed help plenty of other times and been just as belligerent as he always was. "sure, sure..." he trailed off, picking himself up and checking his pocket for his keys. they were always there, but it was good to carry the habit. "we can grab somethin' on the way back," he said, already heading for the front door; "but that means you're staying for dinner. an' that means you're helpin' clean up afterwards."

                         “     like     a     handful,     nothin'     wild     .     thought     my     grit - ling     nephew     n'     niece     would'a     'ppreciated     a     joke,     not     fuckin'     rebel     against     me     like     that     .     i     got     jumped,     man     .     the     hell     kinda     children     are     you     two     raisin'     for     them     to     be     on     sight     like     that     ?     ”     grumbling     along,     he     slouches     at     the     now     vacant     table     with     beer     in     hand     .     “     'course     i     seen     her     !     what'd     you     want     me     to     do     ?!     it     was     a     one     v     three,     i     was     obviously     at     a     disadvantage     !     ”     downing     nearly     the     whole     of     it,     he's     just     as     quick     to     snatch     a     replacement     .      “     anyway,     m'here     with     good     intentions     .     we're     gonna     hang     out     tonight,     have     us     a     good     'ole     fashion     kick - back     !     and     i     ain't     takin'     ‘     no     ’     for     an     answer     .     ”

"jumped?" seth snorted loud enough that it surprised even him a little bit. "c'mon now, you can't be serious. you're playin' pranks an' y'can't take it back?" the idea of three vs one had him outright laughing, his shoulders shaking with the force of his amusement. reaching to pat drew ( much harder than he should have, but unintentionally ) on the shoulder, he said, "you're not seriously puttin' the kids in this, are you? silly enough you're actin' like my wife is anyone t'worry about." of course, seth knew full well that she was. but if he couldn't rib his brother about losing his prank war, who could? "fine, i'll come to your pity party. but you'd better not make me sit an' listen to you bitch the whole time, y'hear?"

                             “     basically,     yeah     .     ”     seeming     more     curious     than     objective,     canon     relies     heavily     on     his     newfound     and     surely     not     long     lasting     courteous     manner     to     further     convince     seth     .     “     i     wouldn't     call     you     a     last     resort,     per     say     .     .     .     but     i'd     rather     not     run     the     risk     of     my     routine     being     leaked     .     you     don't     need     to     know     much,     just     be     mindful     of     my     timing     when     you     read     out     any     leaps     and     jumps     in     -     between     my     chore     sections     .     other     than     that,     you'd     just     be     assisting     with     filming     so     that     it     can     be     reviewed     later     on     .     if     this     is     you     agreeing     though,     we     need     to     be     going     .     ”

for a long moment, seth looked at them like they'd grown a second head. what in the world had happened? what kind of horrible, alien parasite had landed itself in the head of his brother-in-law that he would sink to such depths? please? he was saying please now. "sure thing, pal," he said slowly, pulling himself up from his seat with a curious, if guarded, expression on his face. it was difficult to understand why he would have been picked for something like this. not a last resort per se may not have meant too much, but why even have him be a resort at all? wasn't there anyone else who could have done it? canon must have been truly desperate. "so what's the catch? other than the favor, i mean. you're expectin' me t'drive, right?"

                           “     god,     you're     ridiculous     .     you've     got     a     few     years     and     some     months     on     me,     don't     act     like     i'm     some     barely     legal     teenager     .     the     only     thing     from     you     that     i     need,     bebé,     is     to     quit     trying     to     push     me     away     .     we've     both     got     things     we're     trying     to     put     behind     us,     what's     different     though     is     i'm     not     allowing     it     to     haunt     me     .     ”

"i'm happy you're not some barely legal teenager," romero snorted, shaking his head. "i'd never have anything in common with one of them." it was just difficult to reconcile with sometimes that while he was graduating high school, she wasn't even into middle school yet. yeah, sure—it wasn't like the end of the world. his parents had a bigger age gap. but is that really who he wanted to emulate? "maybe i'm just trying to figure out what it is you like about me so much."

                         “     why     d'ya     think     i'm     here     ?     i     pissed     her     off     n'     she     stuck     my     ass     in     this     fuckin'     corner,     even     had     the     kids     stand     fuckin'     watch     'ta     make     sure     i     didn't     move     .     ”     risking     a     glance     to     be     sure     coast     is     clear,     he     hastily     retreats     from     the     time     -     out     he'd     been     placed     on     .     “     all     i     did     was     splash     a     bit     of     water     on     'er,     thought     it'd     be     funny,     and     then     she     tried     to     drown     me     in     the     sink     for     it     !     when     i     finally     fought     my     way     up,     she     put     me     in     a     goddamn     time     -     out,     soaking     wet     n'     everything     !     she's     the     goddamn     monster     at     this     point     .     ”

staring for a long beat, seth had to find within himself a fair amount of discipline to hold back a snort. time out? that was for children! not that he doubted his suni's judgement in this case. he was positive that if she had deemed such an act necessary, that drew had been doing what he did best—acting like a child. "how much is a little bit of water, huh? y'know she spends a lot of time on her appearance. what you," or he, perhaps; "call a little bit of water might ruin an hour's work." or more! likely more. "you're just being dramatic anyhow. you seen her? how you gonna let her drown you in the sink!"

                             “     i     have     a     favor     .     plea━━     ”     pulling     a     face,     pride     is     swallowed     as     he     struggles     to     get     the     word     out     .     “     damn     .     plea━━     i     have     a     favor     .     .     .     please     .     ”     likes     to     believe     their     relationship     has     improved     somewhat,     especially     with     revelation     of     his     sister's     pregnancy,     but     seth     and     he     were     far     from     buddy     -     buddy     with     one     another     .     still,     he     needs     a     favor,     and     suni's     too     far     along     to     be     able     to     safely     assist     .     “     so,     since     she     can't     be     on     the     ice     with     me,     she     doesn't     want     to     be     bothered     by     accompanying     me     to     the     rink     .     long     story     made     short,     i     need     you     to     read     out     the     routine     she     created     .     that     way     i'm     not     skating     back     and     forth     to     look     or     struggling     with     the     notebook     in     hand     .     ”

folding his magazine, seth stared back at canon with disbelief in his expression. was he trying to say... please? clearly, the word was stuck in his throat. not surprising. but the fact that he was trying at all... that the word even occurred in his mind... was something that he couldn't quite comprehend. who in the world would have seen that coming? nobody. and he had seen a lot of unexplainable things in his life! "y'want me t'come with ya to the rink and... read shit off?" he asked, brow arched. "i dunno anything about skating. that matter?" if it was anything like music, maybe. if not... he could possibly swing it. if only because he was so startled by canon's manners.

                             a     hand     lifts     to     silently     demand     he     shut     up,     not     at     all     concerned     about     finer     details     of     the     newcomer's     work     details     .     “     please     stop     speaking,     you're     whatever     i     tell     you     are     .     and     right     now,     you're     already     a     pain     in     my     ass     .     so     let's     redirect     this     into     being     on     the     right     track,     shall     we     ━━     quit     yapping     and     drive     .     i've     got     a     jam     -     packed     day     and     don't     need     anything     more     from     the     peanut     gallery     .     ”     waving     him     off     dismissively,     he     busies     himself     with     going     over     the     influx     of     appearance     offers     .     not     so     much     as     sparing     warren     a     second     glance     .     “     did     you     slot     my     time     with     the     correct     stylists     for     the     showing     this     morning     ?     bad     press     be     damned,     if     i     go     out     on     stage     looking     ridiculous,     i'm     firing     you     on     the     spot     .     ”

"that is not how this fucking works," he interrupted, clearly unamused by the performance he was being given. most clients were not this difficult to handle, but that didn't mean he couldn't stomp on the brakes if need be. "you want to fire me? go ahead. good luck finding someone else to drive you to the right event, at the right time, and make sure an angry mob doesn't break down your fancy car parade. especially for my rates." for the amount of effort he was going through right now, he felt he was practically giving away his talents. "if you go out on stage looking ridiculous, it's your own damn fault."

                             “     coffee     ?     coffee     ?     i     can't     tell     if     you're     deliberately     attempting     to     sabotage     me     or     just     trying     to     tick     me     off     .     ”     a     hand     darts     to     swipe     the     cup     out     of     warren's     hand     and     to     the     ground     .     stepping     over     mess,     he     slips     effortlessly     into     backseat     .     “     i     don't     drink     coffee     before     nine     in     the     morning,     you     ought     to     be     familiar     with     both     my     schedule     and     habits     .     i     need     a     hot     tea,     something     floral,     preferably     .     and     our     detour     to     the     cafe     had     better     not     cause     a     delay     in     my     interview,     i'd     hate     to     have     to     dock     your     pay     .     ”

staring down the "star" in question, somehow warren managed to find the mental strength not to clock him in his face. "you have me confused with somebody else," he snorted, a warning. "i am not your personal assistant. i'm here to make sure your dumb ass doesn't do anything stupid enough to land you in the hospital." or in prison, but that only went so far. when shit went down, he was not going to stick his neck out for people he had to babysit. "now do i have to buckle your seatbelt for you, or can you do that yourself?"