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Everything I read about recovering from burnout is like āit takes months or even years to fully recoverā and itās like okayā¦. I have a weekend before I gotta clock in on Monday
Just gonna leave this here
āWhile bats can only sense the outer shapes and textures of their targets, dolphins can peer inside theirs. If a dolphin echolocates on you, it will perceive your lungs and your skeleton. It can likely sense shrapnel in war veterans and fetuses in pregnant women. It can pick out the air-filled swim bladders that allow fish, their main prey, to control their buoyancy.
It can almost certainly tell different species apart based on the shape of those air bladders. And it can tell if a fish has something weird inside it, like a metal hook. In Hawaii, false killer whales often pluck tuna off fishing lines, and ātheyāll know where the hook is inside that fish,ā Aude Pacini, who studies these animals, tells me. āThey can āseeā things that you and I would never consider unless we had an X-ray machine or an MRI scanner.ā
This penetrating perception is so unusual that scientists have barely begun to consider its implications. The beaked whales, for example, are odontocetes that look dolphin-esque on the outsideābut on the inside, their skulls bear a strange assortment of crests, ridges, and bumps, many of which are only found in males.
Pavel Golādin has suggested that these structures might be the equivalent of deer antlersāshowy ornaments that are used to attract mates. Such ornaments would normally protrude from the body in a visible and conspicuous way, but thatās unnecessary for animals that are living medical scanners.ā
-Ed Yong, An Immense World
Cetacean echolocation is one of those things that boggles your mind once you really start to think about the implications. They can see each others' hearts beating fast with fear or excitement. They can see if another dolphin is healthy, or pregnant; how the fetus is doing; if they have ingested debris. Their echolocation is also incredibly precise: a bottlenose dolphin could discriminate between cilinders differing in wall thickness by just 0.23 mm (0.009 inch) from 8 meters away!! And they certainly notice when something is off.
I'm not sure if I ever shared this story before here, but in Curacao, when I was allowed to assist in a guest interaction programme, there was suddenly consternation in the pool behind us. A guest had entered the water and the dolphins were going crazy, paying no heed to the trainers anymore. The lead trainer that was with me gave the dolphins to me to watch over while she went to help. When she came back she told me what had happened. The guest that had caused so much uproar had left the water again and was asked if he had done anything to upset the dolphins. He hadn't, and he couldn't imagine what was wrong... until he mentioned he had a pacemaker. The younger dolphins in the pool had never seen someone with a pacemaker before and apparently it rocked their world.
It was such a wild experience, and offered such a cool insight into how dolphins experience their world. I'll never forget it.

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i think heterosexuality does have sexual revolutionary potential to the same extent that homosexuality does. its just that patriarchal society restricts m/f relationships so much that we don't recognize their true potential. like at its best, you are connecting with someone of a different gender- even your "opposite"- and through that connection you end up seeing yourself in them. im not even talking about "getting in touch with your feminine/masculine side" shit im talking about loving/lusting someone so much that you feel they are a part of you, and through that you demystify the other gender and feel profoundly tied to the issues they face. the patriarchy restrains straightness by forcing people in love/lust to always keep a wall between them, to insist on the idea that men and women speak a different language, to still see even the person they love/desire as an Other. a new, freer vision of straightness is one that inevitably fosters genderfuckery and inter-gender solidarity. heterosexual love and lust, freed from its restraints, has the power to shake up the basic patriarchal ideas of how men and women are supposed to relate to each other as "opposites." and this is why bi+ and transhet people are send by God to heal society thank you for coming to my tedtalk
I feel like not enough people realize that people under enormous strain act really really fucking Weird
things humans are known to do when stressed:
-hallucinate
-cry over what seems to be small things
-become furiously angry over what seems to be small things
-hit a self destruct button over and over again
-lose all sense of reality
-becoming straight up unable to communicate
-view every situation as life or death
-experience delusions/become vulnerable to irrational worldviews
-perceive hostility where none exists
-become extremely nauseous and/or throw up
-stop engaging in sleeping/eating/basic hygiene
-stop processing sensory input
-process way too much sensory input all at once
-lash out at others/themselves
-and more!
being able to recognize when a human (ie. you or another person) is so stressed out they cannot think clearly is VERY important for conflict resolution and diffusing emotional crisis. highly recommend trying to train yourself at being able to recognize that state of panic- there is a point in which logic and rationality is useless and you have to address the underlying emotional issue first. knowing that saves everyone a lot of pain and struggle.
LGBTQ+ Pokemon: Relationship Dynamics
Polyamorous Porygon | Polyamorous Porygon2
Polyamorous PorygonZ | Queer Platonic Skitty
Polyamorous has so many flags I had to do three! The Porygons work out so well for these.
I love how you used the Porygon line for the different Polyamorous flags. Itās such a smart idea! (ą¹Ėį“Ė)ļ»
Book Recommendations
Miss Manner's Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior. If you want to read up more on manners outside of this blog, really any book by Miss Manners is going to be my front line recommendation, but this book is the best starting point for Miss Manner's books and gives the best general overview. I especially recommend books by Miss Manners for anyone who feels like they're on the socially awkward side and/or has a habit of accidentally upsetting others without realizing how or why, because Miss Manners actually takes the time to lay out and explain many social norms and boundaries that people expect you to "just know" without ever coming right out and saying.
How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. Now, it was written by a businessman over 100 years ago, so some bits might seem dated and/or more geared towards the professional world. However, I am still including it here and still recommend reading it because I think this book lays down a lot of good and effective ground rules with how to be cordial and amicable in your daily social interactions, as well as good and in depth explanations on why these cordial and amicable behaviors are more preferable than their alternatives.
The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans. Yes, throwing in a book about abusive relationships on this list might seem like an odd choice. However, this book is about so much more than verbally abusive relationships in the conventional sense. This book completely changed my entire worldview on human interactions and human relationships. I cannot rave enough about this book and what it says about human interactions and relationships. I wish I could give a copy to everybody in the entire world. Here's a goodreads review that summarizes why I think everybody in the whole world needs to read this book:
now, as a small disclaimer this book is a few decades old, so you might find some of the language a bit dated. However please don't let that stop you from reading this book, it will change your entire perspective on humanity and human interactions.
I will likely add more to this list at some point. If you're aware of other books / resources you think would be helpful and belong on this list, please feel free to message me.
happy pride month š³ļøāš

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Ice cold takes from a Transgender Woman:
Men are not inherently Evil
Everyone has the capacity for evil
Transgender Men are men
Transgender Women are women
Excluding Cisgender Men from your spaces requires Transgender Men to out themselves if they want to engage (Same for Women)
Anyone can be Non-Binary, there is no "look" or requirement
Non-binary masculine presenting people should be welcome in queer spaces, many are just treated as men and predators
Non-binary feminine presenting people should be welcome in queer spaces without being seen as "Woman-Lite"
Edited the wording on the first point because too many terfs keep thinking I'm their friend.
Bringing back my most popular post for 2026 cause y'all still need it.
Some is better than none. Some is better than none. Some is better than none. Walking for three minutes, is better than nothing. Drinking a glass of water and eating a snack, is better than nothing. Wiping down the counter, is better than nothing. Small things are not nothing. Small things are not nothing. Small things are not nothing. You donāt have to achieve grand things if all youāre capable of right now is the smaller things. They are still achievements. Donāt do nothing just because you donāt think youāre capable of doing bigger things, just do something youāre capable of today. ļæ¼
You have to let people love you. You have to let people get to know you. You have to let people help you. Being so completely selfless that you try to erase yourself off the face of the planet and never ask for anything and reject everybody's offers of support makes you very hard to love! Unfortunately. Emptying yourself out of everything that makes you, you is not actually what your loved ones want from you, generally. They want to make you happy! They will be so so sad if you don't give them the chance. It's not all selfish. I promise.
maverique ask game!
how long have you identified as maverique?
did you use any other labels for your gender before?
do you remember how and where you discovered the word maverique? tell us!
do you use any labels alongside maverique? what are they?
how do you explain your gender to people who don't know the term maverique?
what's your favourite thing to associate with the maverique flag?
what's your favourite thing about being maverique?
what's your least favourite thing about being maverique?
what are your pronouns?
what makes you feel the most maverique?
do you know any other maveriques irl?
do you have maverique headcanons?
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what does maverique mean to you personally?
free space! ask anything about being maverique!
please send a question to whoever you reblogged this from so this game stays alive šš¤š§”
this brochure explains Abdullah Ćcalan's feminist theory (specifically on "killing the dominant man" and socialist gender revolution) and directly references bell hooks' The Will to Change lets fucking go
Though The Will to Change covers many aspects of patriarchy, the key message is the harm and violence patriarchy enacts on the male personality and being. hooks examines the reluctance of feminism, particularly second wave feminism, to deal with male pain caused by patriarchy or even with men in general. The damage inflicted on women every day, and the oblivious entitlement of men, can make us believe that being born male has no significant drawbacks. However, when we only look at the harm that patriarchy does to women, and try to āsolve patriarchyā amongst ourselves, we only see half of the picture. How can we solve the problem if we do not understand the complexity of the patriarchal system? Further, if we exclude men from anti-patriarchal conversations, it is much harder to ask men to change themselves. To say āthis hurts others and you should feel bad about thatā can only go so far. Many more men are likely to engage with anti-patriarchal battles if they can see how patriarchy relates to them, how it has harmed and damaged their relationships with other people, cut them off from their emotional life and stamped on their own happiness. This is one of the paradoxes of the patriarchal system; to defeat it, we need men to challenge themselves, but they can only do that if we address them and show them how to be a part of the struggle. hooksā criticisms also often stem from feminismās rejection and critique of patriarchy without proposing other options. If feminism does not develop an alternative to what hooks calls āwhite supremacist capialist patriarchyā it fails to create a wider revolutionary perspective. hooksā and other writersā critiques of white/middle class feminism provide us with a useful means to evaluate feminist struggle. Through critique we can see which strands of feminism have brought us to a dead end, have been counter productive, or assimilated into capitalist hegemony. One central tenant of JineolojĆ® is also that a science of women and life is the key to the liberation of society as a whole and so cannot be isolated from wider struggle.
the brochure also talks about how feminist education for (cis) men has been practiced in Rojava and the progress made towards building strong anti-patriarchal consciousness. fair warning for my audience that it lacks a strong trans or intersex feminist critique. that being said, trans people are brought up positively and i think its clear that structurally, this feminist approach is a lot more open to those critiques than other forms (even other forms of "transfeminism").
highly recommend checking this out when you have the time; its only a 60 page pdf.
also interesting; in chapter 8, they talk about a series of workshops held in Rojava on KuÅtina Zilam (killing the dominant man) and compare the responses of three different groups of men to various questions. when it came to men who had come to Rojava from Europe to support the revolution, they noted:
Many struggled to answer the question about a free man ["How would you describe the role and characteristics of a free man?"]. Others said they either could not or should not answer, that as male socialised people they carried too much emotional baggage and toxic mentalities to really imagine free relations. This idea appeared many times, preventing them from answering questions. The reflections were interesting, but the pattern that emerged also began to look like a defence or an excuse, afraid to take the step to imagine something positive, to try, to create, not just criticise their own identity. This is certainly, an imprint of patriarchy on men, and shows how deep it runs even into discussions about anti patriarchal struggle. Many had more to say about a free woman, or womenās oppression, struggling to acknowledge their own pain and oppression under patriarchy. Some even saw peopleās freedom as a competition, meaning as a result of men becoming more free, someone else would become more oppressed. They saw menās freedom as a danger that ought to be reigned in. We evaluate this as an acceptance of the patriarchal understanding of freedom itself.
I really appreciate their critique of how men approach the questions, particularly the idea that men shouldn't be theorizing about gender or patriarchy, that men's freedom is dangerous to women, etc. and pointing out that these ideas are themselves born from patriarchy. The core theme here is that (cis) men's reluctance to be personally engaged in feminism, to see it as a "women's thing" they are at best allies to, is a roadblock to patriarchal resistance that must be overcome.
Relatedly, in an earlier chapter, a man who attended educational programmes in Rojava, SƮnan Cudi, talked about being asked by a woman to think of the positives of men:
At the beginning of our personality analyses, we only focused on confessing our bad characteristics as men. We emptied our insides. It was cathartic, but it was not enough to change. Then, we started to ask: What are our good sides? When a woman comrade asked me this question, I thought for half an hour but nothing reasonable came out. If you put yourself in the position of a subject, at the centre of everything, it is very difficult to answer this question. But if you see yourself as one part of life, as a connected being it becomes possible to answer.
In general I think this is one of the best analyses of cis men, patriarchy, and feminism, not so much in depth or length but in striking at the heart of that relationship and what questions we need to ask of ourselves and each other to get where we need to go.

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One thing I really like about Beverly Engel's book It Wasn't Your Fault, which is about PTSD-induced toxic shame, is that quite a bit of it deals with people who haven't broken The Cycle of Abuse (TM) and have gone on to hurt others. That's a really underserved and vulnerable patient population, and statistically, it's also MASSIVE. I don't think I've read a single other self-help type book on PTSD and self-loathing that confronts the possibility that you're exactly as bad as you think you are.
I felt better that it so much as mentioned that children can react to abuse with ungovernable rage. Everybody likes the image of PTSD patients as internalizing everything and becoming doormats, which does happen, and often, but it's not the only narrative. Personally I've always hated my abusers and have always wanted everyone who so much as breathed wrong in my direction from ages 0 to 18 to burn eternally in hell. I *never* thought any of it was my fault and ever since I was a toddler I was willing to make it everybody else's problem, and it's really relieving to read a clinical perspective that acknowledges that abuse victims can act that way too.
It's wild to me that its such a neglected subset of abuse victims. Its really common. When I still lived with my parents and was still subjected to my father every fucking day I would lash out terribly at my mother, to the point when i went to visit them for years afterwards she was afraid I would lash out again. We've worked it out, I'm a much better person when I'm not regularly subjected to mental and emotional abuse, but like, its just so common.
I think it must be, at least partially, because, people hate the imperfect victim. Its easy for so many people to sympathize with someone who never lashed out. Less so for people to sympathize with people who are angry and lash out. Even though its a perfectly sensible reaction to being hurt over and over. I'm sure most people would like to think they would simply never.
I don't think this is the whole reason, but, I think it plays into it.
Similarly, thereās a narrative of, you cannot experience grief over having fucked up. That if you are hurting because you caused harm, because you were the cause of harm, that youāre not allowed to grieve, because you āearned your sorrow. You deserve to bottle it up and to hurt for the bad things you have done,ā
Which is punitive logic. Itās copthink. Which is bad.
important
In fact, you can actually give yourself trauma over fucking up too badly and doing, witnessing, or failing to prevent something evil that goes against your morals; for instance, if you steal your mother's life savings due to drug addiction, kill a civilian during a military operation (please do not join the military), or became abusive because you didn't have the tools and skills yet to handle BPD. In the field of psychology this is called "moral injury" or "perpetrator trauma."
alternatives to āi want to dieā:
i want things to change
i want a different life
today was a shitty day/week
i donāt want to live like this
i want to be somewhere else in life
iām not where i want to be yet
+ much more