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My ace ass: 

My bi ass:

my pan ass:

My lesbian ass:

My gay ass:

my bi-ace ass:

here it is, bitches

Yesterday I went to the doctor and I didn’t cry ! And I was like “I deserve a treat for being a Real Adult” SO of course I go to starbucks. And I meander in and order an iced tea and the barista is all cute and like “oh! Have you tried peach in it??” And I was like “no, do me your best!” And so she whips up this fucking magical tea and it’s SO TASTY

And then I notice they have coffee on tap. Like. Beer taps with coffee. In STARBUCKS. So I’m like “omg coffee beer” and the store was empty so she gave me free samples of ALL the coffee on tap.

AND THEN she’s like “oh! Do you have a minute? Lemme make you my fav drink” and proceeds to whip me up this amazing chai nitro coffee thing FOR FREE! So I’m like “wow!!” And all this time we’re chatting and she’s like a theatre major and I’m an anthro major and we bond over how unemployable we are AND SHES SUPER CUTE OK. We take a cute selfie.

I leave. I sit in my car and I drink my fucking amazing peach tea and I’m like “damn. She was so cute and sweet.” I leave starbucks.

I’m driving down the road, and to the roaring applause of my discord server fam (shoutout to my wlw kingdom) I pull an illegal-ass u turn and go flying back into starbucks.

And im like “HEY! Your drinks are amazing and you can say no but I - canigetyournumber?”

And you know what?

I fucking did.