In a world full of toxicity I finally able to understand and grasp the true meaning of the connotation- Let Them and then be able to transform it to the most empowering statement of - Let Me 🥰.
This is to take you in my intrusive thoughts how I was able to navigate the world where KINDNESS became an expensive thing to date.
Friends becoming strangers, family turns out to be your stressors, work becomes unbearable, left and right responsibilities as a mother and wife where bills keep piling up and that feeling when everything else around becomes unbearable for you.
At first I was so consumed, bothered and get emotional when those people I once friends with drifted apart and slowly become the source of my anxiety.
It started when I personally overheard my two officemates talking shit behind myback. Hearing my officemate gossiping about you is not easy thing to bare with. I was hurt for a fact that I thought they are my friends.
To deal with my anxiety, my defense is with avoidance. Devastated, I left our group chat and started to distant myself. I refused to join group lunch and kept my peace alone. I tried to explain my side to the rest but turns out they all turn their back against me.
They started to ignore me, continue to gossips about me and that is when the disrespect becomes so loud that cause my anxiety. I have breakdown episodes in Boracay which later on in Gods grace become an eye opener for me.
I no longer receives invites. Im not part of the their plans. I stop getting messages. The treatment is getting colder and colder until they started to make my day at work unbearable everyday. It's awful when the reality hits you that the friendship had all gone away.
It did crossed my mind that maybe at some point I have done them wrong unconsciously. As a Christian, I am taught to be accountable for our mistakes and ask for forgiveness for those we have had misunderstanding with. I prayed hard for it and took the leap of asking their forgiveness thinking I could save the little friendship left with them or somehow to smooth things over.
Yes, I have been left out so many times plus the toxicity gets louder and louder everyday.
My husband told me that why would I care so much when the situation only reveals their true colors. When you are too blessed with so many things you do not need anyone bringing negative vibes in your life- in his exact words. I know he was right.
For the past year, I have been so focused in rediscovering myself and realize to stop wasting my time on the things I cant control.
I then learned to stop reacting and start living.
Truly, there is freedom in the two simple words- Let Them.
Let them gossip about you...
Let them disrespect you...
Let them be judgemental on how I live my life...
Let them joke around whenever I make mistakes at work...
Let them spend their precious time without you..
Let them have the best of their lives together...
The more I said Let Them- the more I felt at ease to have the liberty to control my life.
Mel Robbins' Let Them theory is by far the most powerful thing Ive ever discovered. I no longer battle to control the situations, fighting to change someone else perception about me, and no longer worry what other people say.
Let them disrespect you as their disrespect doesnt say anything about you anymore but HOW YOU RESPOND DOES!
But maybe in its truest form I just have to Let Them be.
Let Them - can be letting them do what they want to do, allow them to spend their night and weekend with the people they want to be with.
Let them - enjoy things without you as you want to enjoy your time with the people you want also.
Then it is where the most empowering statement of Let Me barge in. Let Me is reclaiming your personal power focusing on yourself.
Let Me is when you take the lead to change your life's perspective. Taking small steps creating opportunities to invest your energy and time for it.
I started spending time with the people I vibe with. Started waking up telling myself Let Me spend my day my way without having the fear of being misjudge.
Let Me is so empowering that I no longer feel being watch but being in control of my feelings.
