i never wanted it

FUCKED UP, it echoes in her head. other voices repeating it, voices that don’t belong to dixon. they belong to her family, to people she used to know. people she lost before and after she lost herself. mio takes a step back, her whole body turned cold.          ❛          i don’t know—-          ❜

‘  which one are you. 

             ❛             WHAT? sorry?           ❜            her immediate reaction is to feel guilty, a lump building in her throat.

(  DECRYPTING...

MIO XIA GARD / FRANCES TÁN ??????????   BODY     SHARING MORE         INFO           NEEDED CONTACT...        SUPERVISOR... 

they tilt their head , examining closer.  )

‘  ... what.

(  conflicting data runs through their brain. 

FRANC-- MIO XI-- T--- G---  

         “Oh, ya’ know damn right ya’ were.” 

      “Don’t go givin’ me that look.”

‘  what. what look. was i giving a look.

    “ —- yuh, yuh, and when I come-a-knockin’ at four bells we’ll see if you’re fine.” 

               “Find us a quiet lake. Doesn’t sound so bad, Dix.” And then, as an afterthought, “y’know, it means we gotta rise at the ass-crack of dawn. That wouldn’t be a problem for ya’?”

(  they’re temporarily amused by this.  )

“We’ll see if you’re still sayin’ that when the season really gets goin’.” A pause, a breath, long enough for Dag to spare an indulgent smile, as fleeting as it may have been. 

“That or fishin’.” 

‘  i could live with fishing. we could go fishing. 

(  their smile is faint , but valid all the same.  )

       “Yuh — we’ll watch the highlights.” 

‘  but watching it is the good part. 

(  watching the whole game means prolonged physical contact , which , surprisingly is quite enjoyable.  )