
Janaina Medeiros
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Yes…do it like this…
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MUNICH! This is tonight!

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““Fundamentally the problem here with this whole thing is: How is it that you had Karen Bass was in first place, Spencer Pratt was in second place, and then this other woman was in third place. You would expect these mail-in ballots to kind of meet that same basic pattern,” Vance said. “But somehow we find ourselves in a situation where number one—they’re still receiving ballots, not just counting ballots. And number two—the way they’re coming in just so happens to work out such that the Republican is getting kicked out of the final two, so it’s a Democrat-versus-Democrat runoff.”
—
JD Vance Isn’t Handling Republicans’ Defeat in Los Angeles Very Well
Hey, stupid, just wanted to remind you that – hey, look at me when I’m talking to you, Jeffrey Dahmer Vance – I just want to remind you that Los Angeles has nearly 3 times more registered Democrats than Republicans, we have not elected a Republican this century, and votes are counted from different precincts, as well as mail-in ballots, starting when the polls close. A lot of stupid people voted for Pratt, sure, but vastly more people who aren’t complete idiot mouth breathers did not, because he is an idiot, just like you.
You know that, you dumb fuck – I swear to god, Jorts Dingus Vance, take your hand out of your pants, stop staring at that couch, and listen to me – you know that this is how elections have been decided for two centuries in America.
And, yes, the loser in this mayoral contest is the incompetent, unqualified, Republican scumbag who everyone in Los Angeles hates as much as we hate you and that rapist piece of shit you work for. Because he is a loser, and no amount of billionaire money or whining about his loss changes that.
You and your toadies don’t lose elections because they are rigged, Jackhole Dipshit Vance; they lose because voters hate you and your party, and everything you represent.
Run along now, and find some other losers to hang out with while the clock ticks down, ever closer to the moment you are a footnote in a history book, a punchline to a joke that wasn’t ever funny to begin with.
They know that this is how elections work. They know it. Jerkoff Dumbass Vance knows it. But he is saying it to cast doubt in the public mind on the process. Because they know that the truth doesn’t actually matter. All that matters is that they repeat the lie often enough that it works it’s way into the collective unconscious enough to lay the seeds of doubt. That’s it. That’s why they tell obvious lies over and over again. And the truly, butt-clenchingly annoying part is that this tactic works. It works. The oft repeated lie will become the thing that people think when the topic comes up, and they will stop questioning it (if they ever did). This is what the Republican party has been doing for decades.
So instead of directing this at the Vice Couch-fucker, look straight into the camera and tell anyone and everyone reading this…
THEY ARE LYING. YOU KNOW THEY’RE LYING. REMEMBER THAT THEY ARE LYING.
Also, we all know the age-old truth that “he who smelt it, dealt it.” The Republican Party is accusing the Democratic Party of cheating because the Republican Party is actively trying to cheat. They are trying to stop people from being able to vote, trying to disqualify as many votes as they can, because it’s their only chance at winning.
Republicans lose when everyone votes. <- REMEMBER THAT.
Merel by Oona Vanderkoelen
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My latest Guardian Books cartoon.
p.s. I’m on a German book tour: come and see me in Berlin (mon), Frankfurt (tue), or Munich (wed). Details at www.tomgauld.com

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Jill St. John
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