Where Fußball Meets Fun!

Bonus: Richard Bornheimer's depression haircut

It's very uneven because he just can't care anymore. I might edit it to be messier later. Saskia is here for him the way he was there for her after the women's team's disbandment.

After years of real life, I became a vampire, losing all melanin, grew eye bags, and started graying. Though my hair has gone gray since I was 15, I only started drawing it now. Because it's funny.

Also, I don't dress like this IRL lol I prefer more dapper styles. I actually would dress like 1. FC Koeln of Bundeslihaha if I could.

Also after drawing this I realize that the best Freiburg jerseys (not in any particular order) are these ones:

1993/1994 Away

1995/1996 Away

2015/2016 Home

2016/2017 Home

2021/2022 Home

2023/2024 Away

2025/2026 Home

2025/2026 Away

This was drawn on 11 June 2026.

Sketch is here, referenced from a picture I took of the flesh vessel doing this pose. I wanted to make some art where Leverkusen's resentment is plainly visible.

Alternate version. The blue/green backlight is the company colours. Also, I was inspired by Metamourphosis' Chapter 1, where he describes himself as being stared at by electric blue and green eyes in the "privacy" of his mind.

And the base art without all the effects. It's meant to use the company colours in a limited palette to contrast his true self (symbolized with the red irises and black sclera like his club colours.) I also love how iridescent he looks here. Fragile and fancy, like prized jewelry.

Notes:

First and foremost, happy birthday, Bayer 04 Leverkusen! And happy birthday to my partner, WolfspackWriting on Tumblr aka bidgies on AO3! You have been my best friend for almost a decade and I'm grateful to you more than words can express🤍

To my other readers: If you like Bundeslihaha, you should check out their fanmade entries. Vanity aside, their writing is truly amazing, full of personality and emotion!

I hope you enjoy this (very short) story (I intended this to be a drabble practice but ended up exceeding 200...) ❤️

Also, since I hit the character limit on the end notes (yes, imagine having notes longer than the story), thank you in advance for reading! Have a good day/night ;D

And as always, I'd love to hear what you think! 💙

Warning: Implied homophobia and anti-polyamory

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Lions and Laurels

a Bundeslihaha Loose Canon story and Bayer 04 Leverkusen birthday special

You're playing a dangerous game: (You've compromised yourself enough with Stuttgart and Offenbach, Bayer!) (It's three against one. Five, counting Hannover and Hamburg.) You rest your arm upon Arminia's shoulders, and his on yours, singing the chant you wrote together.

Arminia Bie-Lev-eld

Wir brauch’n kein Bier, kein Bayer-Geld

Löwen-Kreuz und Lorbeerkranz

Fäuste hoch in uns're Wand!

Zing! The fans, zapped to life by song, electrify your veins.

Freunde werd’n nie untergeh'n

Blau und rot, die Fahnen weh'n

Niederlage ist OK

Biele und der SVB!

You both take it from the top. Your two voices ring with the strength of a choir, two hearts beating like drums in sync.

The Capo rises, clapping to the same rhythm.

The rest follow—some even sing! They stumble at first, naturally, but tugged by the passion of their personifications, they soon chant as if they've practiced for years.

(You'll see the consequences of not listening…) (Which of your owner's drugs made you immune to this joy?)

And yet. Like his lips on your neck tempted you (“Biele-” “Darling, I’m your Bie-Lev, don’t forget that.”), the true last lines he wrote on your notebook tempt to steer your fans astray:

Schwulenliebe ist OK

Biele und der SVB!

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Notes:

Arminia Bielefeld and Bayer 04 Leverkusen had a fan friendship around 1995 - 2006. They actually called it "BieLEVeld" for real. Link 1 | Link 2 | Link 3

Bayer 04 Leverkusen and VfB Stuttgart had a fan friendship at the time that ended in 1997 at the earliest. Link 1 | Link 2 | Link 3

Arminia Bielefeld, Hamburger SV, and Hannover 96 had/have a fan friendship, which is one of the most famous in Germany. Link 1 | Link 2 | Link 3 (This was uploaded in 2019 but has such a 2000s energy.) | Link 4 | Link 5 | Link 6 | Link 7 (Page 37) | Link 8 (trying and failing to find an unpaywalled version of this damn page - if you know how/where to find it, let me know.)

Speaking of famous fan friendships, the one between Bayer 04 Leverkusen and Kickers Offenbach since 1980 or 1981 is called "Lack und Leder" (Lacquer and Leather, due to their respective cities' industries). Link 1 | Link 2 | Link 3

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Lyrics:

Arminia Bie-Lev-eld Wir brauch’n kein Bier, kein Bayer-Geld Löwen-Kreuz und Lorbeerkranz Fäuste hoch in uns're Wand

Arminia Bie-Lev-eld We need no beer nor Bayer money Lion-cross (Leverkusen's crest) and laurel wreaths (Bielefeld's crest) Raise our fists on our wall (the wall of fans in the stands)

Freunde werd’ nie untergeh'n Blau und rot, die Fahnen weh'n Niederlage ist OK Bielefeld und der SVB!

Friends will never go down Blue and red, the flags wave Losing is okay Bielefeld and the SVB! (Sport-Verein Bayer 04 Leverkusen)

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Unused Lyrics:

Die beste Freundschaft auf dem Feld / der Welt Wir brauchen kein Bier, kein' größten Held Fick dich Bayer!

The best friendship on the field / in the world We need no beer and no great hero Fuck you Bayer (AG)

Singen wir die Lieder treu Siegen wir in jedem Spiel So lang wir zusammen küssen / stehen Meisterhaft zu sein, das ist unser Ziel

We sing our song true We win every game As long as we kiss each other / stand with each other [To be] masterful is our goal

Meisterschaft zu feiern ming Leevje, ich bin Fahrstuhlmannschaft

[Winning the] championship (Bundesliga)? My love, I'm an elevator team

Denn wir lieben unsere Teams beide Stadt sins einfach ??? / wunderschön Keine Fahr ist zu Weit Ostwestfalen und Rhein

Because we love our teams Both cities are simply ??? wonderful No trip is too far East Westphalia and Rhine

Real Madrid: Almost no change from the old design, I just added thick eyelashes. And also freckles because 1) they match Barcelona and 2) they're like stars, which is a reference to the Galácticos (galactically expensive superstar players). I also made his eyes lighter to complement Atletico, his city rival.

Ajax Amsterdam: I've drawn him a few times in 2018 or 2019, including with a funny costume lol. I will post them under the nostalgia tag eventually. I modeled him off of Johan Cruyff a little bit (but not too much). In the different versions, I give him a more visible stubble. Maybe I should also make a version with a full beard like his crest haha. But I want him to look youthful, so...

Atletico Madrid: To complement Real Madrid, I gave her dark hair, skin, and eyes. She used to have long hair as seen on the Atletico Madrid tag, but I gave her curly hair like the "Bundesliga Moe" art from 2015. Her haircut is basically like Reals but more to the front, though not a big pompadour or anything. Though maybe I should've given her one, it would've been awesome lol