selective replies; Here comes the Almighty

(/ key wandered rather aimlessly through the corridors, his hands in his pockets as his feet shuffled along, the soles of his shoes scuffing against the floor and creating an echoing sound of boredom in the stone corridor. looking up and taking a look at his surroundings in what felt like the first time in forever, he blinked as he realized that he was near the hospital wing. how long had he been walking? he had started from the common room, which was three floors up and on the other side of the castle. checking his watch, he realized that an entire twenty minutes had passed in which all he had accomplished was getting across three floors in the longest time possible) - (/ sighing, he shook his head and made a conscious decision to go to the hospital and visit seolhyun, and he walked a bit faster now, with more purpose now that he had an actual destination. however, he was stopped short as he turned a corner to see a familiar figure on the other end of the corridor--one who should have been in bed in the hospital right then) Seolhyun? (/ he called, blinking in surprise) Have you been released already?

birthday apologies | seolkey

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

{` feeling his hand against hers was all the confirmation that she needed. oh how she had dreamed of being able to wake up with him there once more. it had been ages since this had happened and she couldn’t have been happier in that moment just now. she might be bandaged, sore, covered in gashes, but key had stayed the night with her and that was perfect.} i do {` she whispered, smiling softly at him. she hated to see him look so worried over her. she was in the hospital wing now and taecyeon was one of the best healers around, so she was sure she would recover quickly and it would be like it had never even happened at all. her brow furrowed a bit as she tried to predict what it was he was thinking, but key wasn’t someone that was so easily read, despite her being quite good at picking up on people’s emotions and feelings} key, are you okay? {` she asked him. she wondered if he would even tell her if he wasn’t. she hoped he trusted her enough} you look.. angry. {` she whispered, but she gave his hand a feeble squeeze and a smile, hoping to kind of calm him down a bit} no, it’s okay, i don’t need the nurse {` she replied to him kindly} though.. i am kind of hungry… {` she murmured, not having realized that she didn’t eat all that much the past day or so} it’s almost christmas.. can you believe it? {` she asked kind of ironically}

(/ at her question, he blinked, the anger fading from his expression as he looked up at her again, squeezing her hand gently and shaking his head and blinking a few times, his nose crinkling slightly as he came out of his trance) I'm fine. Just....thinking. (/ he said, his thumb running absently over the back of her hand) Are you sure you don't need the nurse? I can go get him for you (/ he said, biting his lip nervously. he couldn't help but worry with her like this, and he wanted to do whatever he could now, seeing as he hadn't really done much for her over the past few weeks. he knew that now was the time to make up for that, so when she said she was hungry, he stood up without releasing her hand, wincing slightly as the sudden movement sent a sharp pain down his back. he straightened up slowly, stretching his sore muscles) Ow....I guess that wasn't the best position to sleep in (/ he muttered before leaning down to press a kiss to seolhyun's forehead, squeezing her hand once more) I'll be right back. I'm just gonna tell Taecyeon you're awake and hungry (/ he explained, pecking the top of her head one last time before dropping her hand and walking around the screen that surrounded the bed so that he could head towards the nurse's office)

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

{` maybe she dreamed, she didn’t really know. was it real? everything was so bright and shiny white, it kind of hurt to look at, like staring into the sun by mistake while enjoying a nice, summer’s day. she had been laying in the grass, her feet at the edge of the lake. her arms were buried in the locks of her boyfriend as he cuddled her on the spot, his cheek resting against her stomach as he held her around the waist. it was perfect. she didn’t want to wake up. waking up meant being alone in the hospital wing. again. waking up meant staring at the wall, out the window, waiting and waiting and waiting. it felt like that was all she was doing these days. waiting to get out of the hospital wing. waiting for her boyfriend to arrive, waiting all the time.} - {` she mumbled slightly in her sleep. it felt like the ground was moving a bit beneath her and key’s tangled forms in the grass, but little did she know it was because her boyfriend was moving back in reality. she tried to roll over and it hurt a bit, which seemed to alert her to the fact that she was dreaming.} - {` her eyes slid open, expecting for her to be there on her own, but instead she saw key. was she still dreaming?} key? {` she lifted a hand as if to reach out for him and touch him, just to be sure that he was real.}

(/ seolhyun began waking up before key could decide on what he was going to do, and when her hand reached out to him, he moved automatically, his own hand moving to take hers. he held it gently as there was a bandage across the back of it, and he ran his thumb over it gingerly, his eyes raising to meet hers) You're awake. Are you hurting? Do you feel any better? (/ he asked, his mind suddenly overcome with worry for her at the sight of the scars and bandages covering her face and body. he wondered how badly she was still hurting, and was hit with a fresh wave of anger towards kai. looking down to hide the emotion from seolhyun, he wondered how long he would hate the other gryffindor. probably forever, he thought. why wouldn't key hate him forever? the boy had attacked seolhyun, put her in the hospital wing right before christmas, her favorite holiday. but key couldn't get mad now--now was the time to take care of seol. so he swallowed once and looked up again, squeezing her hand lightly in his own) Want me to go get the nurse? (/ he asked, moving to stand up)

birthday apologies | seolkey

birthday apologies | seolkey

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

{` he came up. oh thank god he was coming up. for a moment, she was worried that he wasn’t going to, and then the space between them would feel all the more present. but as he climbed onto the bed, she could feel it ebbing away. she wrapped her arms around him, hugging him as he rested his head against her stomach. her hands found their home in his hair once more, stroking it softly as she closed her eyes. this was just what she needed. she was tired, she had been tired for ages, ever since the attack, but sleep just wasn’t coming easily. she would drift off, only to wake up in a nightmare, her body shaking, which only made her whimper in further pain. with him there, it would be fine, everything would be fine. they didn’t have to talk, they didn’t have to do anything at all. she had just missed his presence so much that this was more than enough to make up for the lack of her boyfriend for the past few weeks.} - {` she wasn’t sure when it started to happen, but she began to drift off. her fingers, once combing through his hair, were slowing in pace. sometimes they stopped altogether as she nodded off, and then started again a few seconds later as she forced herself awake. and then she was off, the world lost to her as she drifted into a real sleep}

(/ he was still crying, though it wasn't nearly as bad as it had been before. tears fell from his eyes onto the fabric of seolhyun's hospital gown, but neither of them minded. his eyes fluttered closed as her hands found his hair again, and he finally began to calm down, taking deep breaths in through his nose and shakily exhaling them through his mouth. he could feel seolhyun's breaths evening out, too, and her hands kept stopping and then starting again, which meant she was falling asleep. Kibum didn't mind, thinking that her even breaths would help lull him to sleep. Once she was asleep, he smiled, sighing once before matching their breaths, so that he was both inhaling and exhaling with her. That feeling combined with the crushing, exhausting weight of everything that had happened that day helped lull him off to sleep, actually managing to sleep without nightmares for the first time in almost a month) - (/ when he woke, they were in the same position, and it took kibum a moment to figure out where he was, but when he did he sat up, a hand finding his hair. he sighed, running his fingers gently over the bedhead, then his eyes found seolhyun, who was still asleep, and he froze, suddenly unsure what to do as memories of the night before came rushing back to him)

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

{` the harder he cried, the harder she cried. she stroked his hair, just wanting to get closer to him, but given her current condition, it was pretty much impossible right now. tears flowed freely down her face as she sobbed against her pillow} Key, that’s all I have ever needed to hear {` she whispered. it was what she was craving. it was all she needed from him. he didn’t have to buy her things or do fancy things for her. she just wanted him there, with her and to hear that he loved her. her heart felt like it was going to burst, so hard it was thudding against her rib cage. she wanted to kiss him and hold him and the fact that she was in too much pain to do so was killing her} that’s.. all.. i wanted to hear.. {` she choked through her sobs. even if it hurt, she scooted backwards, making room for him to lay on the bed with her. even if they couldn’t exactly cuddle, she just wanted to feel him near her, in the same space. him being on the floor and her on the bed made her feel like there was some kind of separation between them.} please {` she whispered, her eyes open and on his, tears staining her cheeks. her fingers fell from his hair as she moved backwards and waited for him to come to her, like she had always been waiting. she waited weeks and she’d wait more if she had to}

(/ he wished she wouldnt cry, though he knew it was probably because he was crying, which only made him cry harder. figured. the more he thought about it, about her feelings, his feelings, everything, he just wanted to cry harder, and he had no choice but to give in, his tears staining the sheets underneath him, though he does take some comfort in the feeling of her fingers in his hair. but then even those are gone, and he looks up to find her making room for him on the bed. and yes it's humiliating, and the rational part of his mind is screaming no no no don't you fucking dare you little shit but, for once, those words he's always said to himself actually hurt, and the only one who can make them better is offering him a place next to her, so he crawls onto the bed, his head resting on the lower part of her stomach and all four of his limbs curled around her legs, and he's silently thankful that her lower half is unhurt. that way he can still kind of cuddle with her, even if it is a humiliating position. he's definitely grateful for the screens around the bed, though. he doesn't know what he'd do if those weren't there)

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

{` she turned towards him with some difficulty as he wiped the tears from her face. she sniffled slightly, feeling her emotions welling up even further. she tried so hard to bury them down, not wanting to divulge the tears. she wanted so badly to make him feel better. what kind of girlfriend was she if she couldn’t even take care of her boyfriend?} but key {` she whispered, her voice seemingly not able to get any louder than that at the moment} i love you. i want to be a part of your life. i want to.. i want to be there for you when things aren’t going well. otherwise.. why am i even here, you.. you know? {` she tried to shrug, giving him an apologetic look} i want to listen to your complaints and your worries and your dreams and your hopes. i want to. it’s not annoying at all. i just want to be included.. {` she pressed her lips together, her gaze falling from his face and to his knee instead, embarrassed and worried that she had gotten too clingy or deep for him} but if you don’t want to.. i understand. i’ll always be here, waiting for you key.

(/ he froze, listening to her words while staring at his lap, his hands still holding hers loosely. as she spoke, tears dripped from his eyes and landed on his pants, though he hardly minded, just staring at the spot blankly as his mind thought about her words. he had been an idiot--a complete idiot. did he really not know her at all? of course seolhyun wouldn't mind hearing about his problems. of course she would want to help him. merlin, she had probably hated him before. he had given her nothing, just up and left. and now he was here giving her his shitty excuse--he seriously would not blame her at all if she just hated him forever--but she was accepting him. she was just like him here--she wanted to be accepted. at that realization, kibum crumbled, pushing himself from his chair so that he was kneeling on the floor, his forehead in the covers next to seol's torso as he cried, her hand somehow ending up on top of his head. it felt nice--he wished she'd stroke his hair. that had always helped him calm down when he was little. but he couldn't say that, he could only cry into the sheets, wishing he could hold her but knowing that trying would hurt her) Thank you (/ he sobbed, his hand finding her (thankfully uninjured) thigh and holding onto it) I love you. I love you, Seol. Merlin, I love you.

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

{` she wanted to sit up but it was so difficult. the wounds on her stomach, back, and arms screamed in protest as she tried to move closer to him. she gave his hand a weak sort of squeeze, the best she could muster with her lack of energy.} Key, don’t cry {` she choked out, starting to cry herself, which only made her body hurt more. she bit her lip and stared at the ceiling above her, a few tears streaming down her cheeks before she turned her head to face him} Key, it’s okay. {` she whispered. she had been so angry at him only days ago, filling her head with angry words that she wanted to throw at him the next time that she saw him, but he was here now and all of that anger melted away as quick as a blink} I know you must have had a good reason, I know it, it’s okay {` she wasn’t sure if that was true or not. people simply lost interest in people sometimes, that wasn’t anyone’s fault, and maybe Key had been losing interest in her, but she told herself that there was a reason and that he wasn’t just forgetting about} Key, why are you crying, please don’t. I’m tough {` she gave him a watery smile} See? Still alive. 

(/ he shook his head, over and over, holding her hand tighter) I'm sorry. I'm so sorry (/ he repeated again and again, feeling like it was all he could say and still not enough. he sat up, still holding her hand and frowning at the tears he could see on her cheeks) Shhh, don't cry. You crying makes it worse (/ he whispered, reaching out to ever-so-gently rub the water from her face) I'm sorry, I just- (/ he wiped his own face then, sniffling slightly) There's been a lot going on at home, and I didn't know how to tell you and I didn't want to annoy you with all my talk about my family but... (/ he sighed, putting on a half-sad, half-hopeful smile) Suffice it to say you can't come over during break. But I don't think I'll be going either, so it's not like it matters anyway. (/ he ran his thumb over the back of her hand, wincing as he found another scar there) Don't worry about it too much, though. I just thought you should know why I've been...avoiding you. (/ he whispered the last part, a tear spilling down his cheek again, and he wiped it away almost angrily)

✾ [ bt ] not exactly christmas | seolkey

Hi Key {` she whispered, her smile was gentle and warm and her eyes were swimming in what might have been tears of happiness or tears of pain, she wasn’t sure which. she wanted to reach out, to feel his skin beneath her fingertips, to hold his face. how long had it been since she was able to do that? it went from every day to, quite suddenly, never. she hated that. she hated that so much because she missed him constantly. it was like having a constant stomach ache and she just couldn’t get rid of it} You’re really here {` she whispered, hardly daring to believe it. if she blinked, he would be gone and this moment would be a dream. as she lifted her arm to try to reach him, she let out a yelp of pain and her face scrunched up. she dropped her arm back to the bed, a tear trickling down her cheek. her body hurt so terribly, she didn’t know what to do. was she dying? a slow and painful death?} Key, it hurts {` she whimpered, curling up lifelessly on the bed, feeling absolutely helpless and defenseless. it seemed like all of her emotions from the past few weeks were splashing down on her, threatening to drown her as she struggled for breath} Key, I miss you so much {` she whispered. she didn’t care about her injuries at all. in fact, with him here, they were hardly on her mind.

Hi Seolhyun (/ his smile was small and kind of sad, but it was definitely real--one of the first real smiles that had reached his face since he-didn't-even-know-when. As she whimpered, though, his eyebrows furrowed, and he leaned forward on his knees, taking one of her hands in his and using his other to gently brush the hair out of her face, his fingertips just barely brushing over the scarred skin) Shhh, I know. I'm sorry. (/ his finger traced over a scar from one of the shallower cuts, and he couldn't help the wave of fresh rage that attacked him. why? even if he hadn't been aiming for her, why had that douche even wanted to use this spell in the first place? it was immoral and wrong, and he needed punishment--key had already written to his father, one of the school governors, to try and get it underway. whether or not his father would actually read the letter was a different story, however. at seolhyun's next words, though, key's heart clenched, and he squeezed his eyes shut, using both hands to bring her hand up some so he can lean his forehead against it, careful for her injuries) I know (/ he whispered, his voice breaking) I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. (/ he was fighting tears already, though he didn't want to be. seolhyun couldn't see him cry again. not when she was hurt.)

(/ he began to wake up slowly, seolhyun's voice pulling him from the world of dreams. 'ow!' she was saying. maybe that meant he should probably check on her, huh? why would she be saying ow, anyway? had she tripped and fell again? or maybe she was trying to cook--key certainly knew how much of a fail she could somehow manage to pull off in the kitchen. wait. shit. of course she was saying ow--she was in the hospital wing because of that dickbag kai. key had been there. the memories came rushing back to him, and he sat up straight with a start, immediately leaning closer to seolhyun to make sure she was still (relatively) alright. once his eyes had done a quick once-over of her bandages and he had confirmed that none of her wounds had opened up again, he sighed in relief and sat back in his chair, biting his lip nervously as he noticed she was awake and staring at him) Uh, hi. You're okay, right? I mean, you know. You're doing better than before? (/ he asked, not missing the obviously awkward vibe between them. the small box in his pocket suddenly felt a hell of a lot heavier for some reason)

mistletoe victim -- seolkey

{` she grins brightly at the boy, lacing her fingers with his and leaning her head on his shoulder as they start walking} If you like, I can stop finding excuses to kiss you {` she says sweetly, as if it was a very desirable option for him to take} - {` she swung their hands together between them as if she hadn’t said anything out of the ordinary at all} I hope.. you’re not enjoying too many of those other kisses {` she murmured quietly, flushing slightly as she stared at the ground, watching her feet hit the stone with each step}

(/ he purses his lips, humming softly at her words) Yeah, how about you don't (/ he chuckles, feeling her head drop onto his shoulder and not making any move to push her away. he laughs again at her next words, shrugging her head off so he could shake his head) Nah, not really. And besides, they're all kissing me on the cheek. There was this one kid from my house who kissed me on the lips, but that was....weird, to say the least. (/ he grins again, his thumb brushing absently over the back of her hand as they ascended the marble staircase) Where are we going, anyway?