Dreamboats and Brioche Toast

i BURST OUT laughing at this and when my dad in the next room asked "what's so funny" i said "nothing i can explain succinctly"

Honestly I love ironically ugly clothes. Like. Hideous in a special way. If it’s not inherently hideous I’ll match it until it is.

Me, walking off a bus in a leather sports bra, body harness, mesh shirt, holographic skirt, over the knee striped socks, wedged high tops, and a cat purse: I am a beacon of sin and I Am Here!

im offended that yr trying to pass this off as ugly

This is the same guy that does the guide to troubled birds.

me, holding my newborn child: what are its stats??

You’re a mean one mr grinch isn’t even a Christmas song. Doesn’t even mention Christmas once. Just a dude dragging the hell out of the grinch for 3 minutes. Could be played on the radio year round.

best gif of the year award goes to horse plinko. everybody give it up for horse plinko

Me being gunned down in a New York speakeasy after Tony Pastroni found out I been sleepin with his girl

by the way the funniest thing ive read all week is this post on reddit i think where somebody asked for the pros and cons of different stem majors and so this one girl responded and she said she was a software engineer i believe and then she said “ok pro #1. i never have to wait in line for the bathroom ever again. there are more female restrooms in this building than there are women”

pro #2: growing up i was surrounded by so many saras. just. saras everywhere. which sara do you want? but now, as a software engineer, I am the only sara. the eleven marks weep in jealousy. 

the marks smdjdjdjdjd YEAH when i took my first compsci class the lab section had twice as many nicks than there were women

someone was complaining to me about how there are too many ryans on the team, and i said “you wanna know how to fix that? hire more women” and the only other woman sitting nearby spat out her coffee

I love driving with my windows down but at what cost??

I’ll tell you whats the cost the other drivers around me can hear me go hard to natasha bedingfield’s iconic bop pocketful of sunshine while yelling at them for being morons who don’t know how to use a turn signal