Bubblegum Bassarisk

Nothing more, nothing less

Every night I feel sadder and emptier

I don't think we tried hard enough and I wonder if I cross your mind as often

I don't really know what to do with myself now

I worry that I yearn for something I desperately want and I worry that I don't deserve it at all.

I'm tired and sad and lonely, caring for others but no one to care for me

It stings to know and to know that you never wondered if I needed it

Starting to know my worth is lonely and hurtful because I don't want to endure the same pain anymore.

The coldness, the dismissal, the silence seeps into my bones.

With it a new tear to my heart next to the ones I've been nursing

My head feels heavy but it's the lightest my heart has ever been.

I'm afraid that when I check, the pieces I find aren't truly myself. I'm afraid that they're made out of fear and pain and necessity just to look whole because whatever was supposed to be there is long gone.

I hope my absence freezes you from the inside.