unholyrod:
rod swung his head wide, side to side. “nah. that’s old life.” swinging back to kian, “if I go back on that, it’s like. popping the seal. what about all the other stuff I’ll get hung up on?” still, he grinned.
and that grin grew, watching kian go on about his father’s dishes. “see, there’s something right there. those of us that had full families. or– as full as they could be, with good memories.” hands on his knees, “why’d we leave?”
but it wasn’t his turn. “fears. I mean, once you take death off the list, it’s kinda chill. not heights, not monsters.” with a frown, “maybe it’s, that we go through with all this, and one day, we look down. look in.” his head bops to the side. “and a flash hits, we don’t know who we are.” his upper lip scrunched up under his nose, a bit. “last question to you, though. why’d you leave all that good cookin’ behind?”
rod has a point. going back to the old after so much of the new would be hard. there’s still that ache in kian’s chest for his family, his friends. but it’s not as poignant anymore. there’s different aches now, newer ones.
the question was one poised before, just seconds ago, but this time hammered home. why did he leave? the smile on his face falters for a moment but he paints it back on in an expert stroke. he shrugs his shoulders, carelessly, and looks over at rod before he rests his elbows on the table and his chin in his hands.
“something always felt missing.” he shrugs again, a lazy smile drifting over his lips. “like i was meant for more. i thought it meant i’d have my own art gallery one day but instead i got all this.” he moves one hand, gestures around them. “it’s more dangerous but it’s exciting, it’s new, unpredictable.” he stands up, holding a hand out for rod to take. “i like that.”
if rod takes his hand, he tugs him along, out into the winter night. “let’s go for a walk while you answer this last one.” he waits for a moment. “would you let me paint you sometime? doesn’t have to be nude—not unless you’d like being naked for me to paint. but i think you’d be a wonderful model.” it isn’t necessarily a deep question, but he hasn’t painted in a while and he thinks maybe rod wouldn’t mind..









