Super banana

Who am I? What I really want? Been asking this to myself for years but until now I still don't know the answer. I'm getting tired of running in circles but don't know how to stop so I ended up running another round and another round.

It's not about the world outside me now, the chaos within me is getting out of control.

Can we even forgive ourselves?

Isn't it weird how people easily assumed that you're not struggling just because you are smiling and laughing despite of the fact that there's so much things going on around you?

Is it that hard? All I want is to sleep in peace, but the whole damn universe in my head won't cooperate.

I don't know where to begin, I'm overwhelmed with an unknown feeling. My heart aches for no reason, my eyes cries a very loud and dark tears. I've been shouting out loud but nobody hears anything even though I am surrounded by people.

People keep on saying "You should be grateful," "You should be happy" and I was like, fuck! I want too. But my mind is so fucked up that I don't even know how to be.

It's not easy... It's never been easy, not for me, not for you and not for them. Life itself is full of ups and downs, and that's what makes it hard but you know what? You're perfectly fine, look where you are now! You've gone through so much but here you are... Standing strong, so keep on going.. You can do it, and there's a lot of people who got your back!