ME

Everything we worked for... Everything we did... Everything we have fight for... Everything we have accomplished... All the trust... All the hope... Everything broke because of you...!

When you have a stressful day at work... Your suppose to come home... To your significant other.. Your suppos to come home to open arms... Not come home and be alone... Not come home and cry... Not come home to a lonely bed... Not come home and find everything look so lonely... Not come home and be lonely and miserable

Some sacrifices I'm willing to make even if others don't get why... Some sacrifices are worth it in the end... Some sacrifices I wish I didn't have to make... Some sacrifices are you and everyone on my past... Some sacrifices hurt like hell.... But in the end... He's worth all the sacrifices I've made.... I've sacrificed my believes, my family, my happiness at times, my view points, and even my will to be free and young... Yet compared to what others have taken from me it just seems like those sacrifices are only a spect of dust in the air.... I hope one day those sacrifices I won't have to make anymore....

I sometimes I wonder if following all the way here was a mistake... I wonder if letting you go was what I should have done... I wonder if you really can change... I wonder if staying is for the best... I wonder if you really do love me... I wonder if I belong by your side... I wonder if all the things you said to me were and are true or if you just said it to say what I wanted to hear... I wonder if I should be here... I wonder if I should fight this much for you... I wonder if it's all going to be worth it in the end... I wonder... Do you actually belong to me? Are we meant to be? Am I yours? Are you mine? Am I wrong? Am I right?

As soon as I start trusting you... You turn and you do this... How am I suppose to believe you if you do this kind of crap to me....

You know some times i wonder... Would it really matter?! Would it really matter if i cut? If i killed myself?! I mean i had to think about it and nope it doesnt... My mom doesnt seem to care... Or my dad... My family is better off with out me being a hassle... My friends will eventually forget..... I mean whats the point of living if i cant actually live... I feel trapped... I dont see the point off being here any more....

why set yourself for heartache? you know its coming... you know you can't stop it... but yet you still do it... you think it all changed... you thought it was all good... you thought you were making progress... you thought this time i got it right... you though it was finally the "right time" then the truth hits you hard and you see that it was all wrong... it wasn't any different than before... you let yourself begin to fall but then gravity takes over hard and you realize that it will always come out this way... but yet you still want to keep trying to fix it and you always get the same result, you know it! But you keep trying to change it.... and through out it all you begin to loss yourself but you keep trying to fix it... fix the relationship... fix the friendship... fix him... and you end up broken yourself....

I wish that for once I was though of first... You know, today it was hard for me... It was my last UIL and I wanted you there but I guess you had better things to do... I think you've been to just one or two of my performances! And it sucks when I get off stage and everyone is there with their families and I'm just like yeah.... I think I'm going to go... It fees king sucks and it hurts so badly! It hurts to feel less thought off by my own mother! You think oh it just a play but it's not even that... Like you always put me last and up to a point it hurt that you go to my brothers performances all the time! You make time for them but the times I want you there or that we have a performance something comes up and you can't be there for me! I don't know what to do anymore for you to take and interest in what I do.... It's my last year for you to see me and you couldn't! It's my last year and it just seems like the more time passes the less you care about me... Just because I'm older but the truth is that I need you so much now more than ever but it doesn't seem to matter to you! I don't know what to do to get your attention... I thought that by winning that award you might be proud of me but I guess I was wrong! And like always I end up crying alone because your to busy to care about me.... I wish that for once you would actually care....

So now i know that my step-dad thinks I'm easy.... so i guess that if he thinks that it's probably true.....