Wheatley

heeyyyy um i heard about you from some others and just uh. wanted to say hi? um.

uh- oh yknoowww. just heard around about how um. youu arree.. that’s not important actually um.

YES!!! JUST THE SUN! EXACTLY LIKE THE SUN!!! BECAUSE THE SUN IS SO BIG AND PRETTY AND,,, SPACE,,,

yeah it is pretty cool huh. i’ve only seen it once and it was really bright and hurt my eye- f

YEAHHHH IT HURT WHENS YOU LOOK. AT IT. BUT THERE’S PICTURES!!! A LOOOOT OF PICTURES OF IT THAT YOU CAN LOOK AT THAT DON’T HURT YOUR EYE!!! SO MANY. SOOOO PRETTY. THE SUN IS SO PRETTY. AND THE STARS. THE SUN IS A STAR.

heeyyyy um i heard about you from some others and just uh. wanted to say hi? um.

uh- oh yknoowww. just heard around about how um. youu arree.. that’s not important actually um.

YES!!! JUST THE SUN! EXACTLY LIKE THE SUN!!! BECAUSE THE SUN IS SO BIG AND PRETTY AND,,, SPACE,,,

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-

Of course I do! Wouldn't say it if I didn't, would I? And you are just the cutest, seriously.

The- THE, UM-

(He made a silly, over dramatic little “mwah” sound.)

Oh, really? I- I’m the kissable one here? Am I? Mmm, no. No, I would say tha- that YOU’RE the most kissable person, uh, core… here. Actually. In fact, why don’t I just- ?

(Grady let a couple giggles slip before he started thinking to himself. Oh, so it's a competition now? Fine. I'll let him have it.) Oh, you wanna play this game, sugar? Fine then.

(Immediately, he just melts, happily kissing Grady back and wiggling his handles around a bit. He loves his bf so much you guys. I think it’s safe to say he’s lost the competition.)

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-

Of course I do! Wouldn't say it if I didn't, would I? And you are just the cutest, seriously.

The- THE, UM-

(He made a silly, over dramatic little “mwah” sound.)

Oh, really? I- I’m the kissable one here? Am I? Mmm, no. No, I would say tha- that YOU’RE the most kissable person, uh, core… here. Actually. In fact, why don’t I just- ?

(Grady let a couple giggles slip before he started thinking to himself. Oh, so it's a competition now? Fine. I'll let him have it.) Oh, you wanna play this game, sugar? Fine then.

(Immediately, he just melts, happily kissing Grady back and wiggling his handles around a bit. He loves his bf so much you guys. I think it’s safe to say he’s lost the competition.)

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-

Of course I do! Wouldn't say it if I didn't, would I? And you are just the cutest, seriously.

The- THE, UM-

(He made a silly, over dramatic little “mwah” sound.)

Oh, really? I- I’m the kissable one here? Am I? Mmm, no. No, I would say tha- that YOU’RE the most kissable person, uh, core… here. Actually. In fact, why don’t I just- ?

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-

Of course I do! Wouldn't say it if I didn't, would I? And you are just the cutest, seriously.

The- THE, UM-

(He made a silly, over dramatic little “mwah” sound.)

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-

Of course I do! Wouldn't say it if I didn't, would I? And you are just the cutest, seriously.

The- THE, UM-

HELLO THERE!! I like the blue in your optic!! BLUE IS SUCH A NICE COLOR all about those uhh earth tones!!

It really is!! Blue is probably up there on my favorite color scale! I mean yours go to dark to light ORRR THE OTHER WAY AROUND!! Depends on how you see it!

Yeah! Like a wheatfield! EXACTLY! That’s- Yeah! Right again! You’re really good at guessing things, eh?

Heh well I guess you can say I’m good at guessing! I do sometimes just take my shot and hope it lands, it was just the closest thing I know to your name!

Ohh right! There must be a process..

RIGHT! Those exist, don’t they?!

Ooh, right, right! An experiment! Tha- That’s a good way of, uh, thinking about it!

Exactly! And Aperture is all about science soo WE GOTTA!!

Right, i- it’s weird, innit? You know, I don’t even know WHY they gave me this accent, aren’t we i- in Michigan, or something? It’s wild. Honestly. But yeah, a- a little, um, funny sounding, I suppose. Hehe. “Bloody.” Don’t even know where that word came from. I mean, if I say this place is “BLOODY MASSIVE” and all that, I don’t mean that it’s LITERALLY bloody- okay, well, it IS actually quite bloody, a LOT of people have died down here, ummm… but you get my point. Weird saying. Or just- just word. In general. Weird word. British thing. I think. That’s what I’m assuming here. Again, w- we’re in Michigan.

I like your accent though! We maaay be somewhere completely different but, it’s unique! It TOTALLY stands out from many cores in the facility! It’s like..hm how do I put this.. you have your own type of LANGUAGE! YEAH!! I have never once heard someone say “bloody” in terms of big. Oh yeah, that’s right many people have died here! I guess it’s metaphorical AND literally bloody! Hah, that’s crazy! I-I mean not crazy that people died that’s just.. sad- 

Hehe, well, y- you’re not gonna believe this. Never gonna believe this. It was Her. Yeah! Like- Like, THAT Her, SHE made that thing! She made the cake! For some testing thing, apparently, don’t know what all that was about. It happened while I was deactivated.

…HER. LIKE.. HER HER???.. HER!? WHAT.. NO WAY!! That’s crazy, HOW DID SHE EVEN MAKE ONE??!! I bet she put poison in that thing!

Yep! Hehe! Yep. Brave.

UHHH, I- I mean, I wouldn’t worry about it TOO much, y- you’ll probably be fine! Probably! Don’t see why She would want to kill you, specifically, tha- that’s- NOT THAT SHE WOULD! KILL YOU! J- Just to make that clear, it’s fine, i- it’s perfectly fine!

U-uhm okay sooo I just need to be careful of her.. r-right? I’M PRETTY SURE SHE WOULD BUT- if I stay in the clear and don’t get ANYWHERE near her, I’ll be juuuuuust fine..

HELLO THERE!! I like the blue in your optic!! BLUE IS SUCH A NICE COLOR all about those uhh earth tones!!

It really is!! Blue is probably up there on my favorite color scale! I mean yours go to dark to light ORRR THE OTHER WAY AROUND!! Depends on how you see it!

Yeah! Like a wheatfield! EXACTLY! That’s- Yeah! Right again! You’re really good at guessing things, eh?

Heh well I guess you can say I’m good at guessing! I do sometimes just take my shot and hope it lands, it was just the closest thing I know to your name!

Ohh right! There must be a process..

RIGHT! Those exist, don’t they?!

Ooh, right, right! An experiment! Tha- That’s a good way of, uh, thinking about it!

Exactly! And Aperture is all about science soo WE GOTTA!!

Right, i- it’s weird, innit? You know, I don’t even know WHY they gave me this accent, aren’t we i- in Michigan, or something? It’s wild. Honestly. But yeah, a- a little, um, funny sounding, I suppose. Hehe. “Bloody.” Don’t even know where that word came from. I mean, if I say this place is “BLOODY MASSIVE” and all that, I don’t mean that it’s LITERALLY bloody- okay, well, it IS actually quite bloody, a LOT of people have died down here, ummm… but you get my point. Weird saying. Or just- just word. In general. Weird word. British thing. I think. That’s what I’m assuming here. Again, w- we’re in Michigan.

I like your accent though! We maaay be somewhere completely different but, it’s unique! It TOTALLY stands out from many cores in the facility! It’s like..hm how do I put this.. you have your own type of LANGUAGE! YEAH!! I have never once heard someone say “bloody” in terms of big. Oh yeah, that’s right many people have died here! I guess it’s metaphorical AND literally bloody! Hah, that’s crazy! I-I mean not crazy that people died that’s just.. sad- 

Hehe, well, y- you’re not gonna believe this. Never gonna believe this. It was Her. Yeah! Like- Like, THAT Her, SHE made that thing! She made the cake! For some testing thing, apparently, don’t know what all that was about. It happened while I was deactivated.

…HER. LIKE.. HER HER???.. HER!? WHAT.. NO WAY!! That’s crazy, HOW DID SHE EVEN MAKE ONE??!! I bet she put poison in that thing!

Yep! Hehe! Yep. Brave.

UHHH, I- I mean, I wouldn’t worry about it TOO much, y- you’ll probably be fine! Probably! Don’t see why She would want to kill you, specifically, tha- that’s- NOT THAT SHE WOULD! KILL YOU! J- Just to make that clear, it’s fine, i- it’s perfectly fine!

U-uhm okay sooo I just need to be careful of her.. r-right? I’M PRETTY SURE SHE WOULD BUT- if I stay in the clear and don’t get ANYWHERE near her, I’ll be juuuuuust fine..

HELLO THERE!! I like the blue in your optic!! BLUE IS SUCH A NICE COLOR all about those uhh earth tones!!

It really is!! Blue is probably up there on my favorite color scale! I mean yours go to dark to light ORRR THE OTHER WAY AROUND!! Depends on how you see it!

Yeah! Like a wheatfield! EXACTLY! That’s- Yeah! Right again! You’re really good at guessing things, eh?

Heh well I guess you can say I’m good at guessing! I do sometimes just take my shot and hope it lands, it was just the closest thing I know to your name!

Ohh right! There must be a process..

RIGHT! Those exist, don’t they?!

Ooh, right, right! An experiment! Tha- That’s a good way of, uh, thinking about it!

Exactly! And Aperture is all about science soo WE GOTTA!!

Right, i- it’s weird, innit? You know, I don’t even know WHY they gave me this accent, aren’t we i- in Michigan, or something? It’s wild. Honestly. But yeah, a- a little, um, funny sounding, I suppose. Hehe. “Bloody.” Don’t even know where that word came from. I mean, if I say this place is “BLOODY MASSIVE” and all that, I don’t mean that it’s LITERALLY bloody- okay, well, it IS actually quite bloody, a LOT of people have died down here, ummm… but you get my point. Weird saying. Or just- just word. In general. Weird word. British thing. I think. That’s what I’m assuming here. Again, w- we’re in Michigan.

I like your accent though! We maaay be somewhere completely different but, it’s unique! It TOTALLY stands out from many cores in the facility! It’s like..hm how do I put this.. you have your own type of LANGUAGE! YEAH!! I have never once heard someone say “bloody” in terms of big. Oh yeah, that’s right many people have died here! I guess it’s metaphorical AND literally bloody! Hah, that’s crazy! I-I mean not crazy that people died that’s just.. sad- 

Hehe, well, y- you’re not gonna believe this. Never gonna believe this. It was Her. Yeah! Like- Like, THAT Her, SHE made that thing! She made the cake! For some testing thing, apparently, don’t know what all that was about. It happened while I was deactivated.

…HER. LIKE.. HER HER???.. HER!? WHAT.. NO WAY!! That’s crazy, HOW DID SHE EVEN MAKE ONE??!! I bet she put poison in that thing!

Yep! Hehe! Yep. Brave.

UHHH, I- I mean, I wouldn’t worry about it TOO much, y- you’ll probably be fine! Probably! Don’t see why She would want to kill you, specifically, tha- that’s- NOT THAT SHE WOULD! KILL YOU! J- Just to make that clear, it’s fine, i- it’s perfectly fine!

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-

Of course I do! Wouldn't say it if I didn't, would I? And you are just the cutest, seriously.

The- THE, UM-

Hey, I just realized we've had Marbles here this entire time. We kinda just. took her. -@aperturedeadend

Hmmm. Don’t know about that one.

Alright then. Hmm.

(He knew exactly what Wheatley wanted to hear.)

(Grady rolled his eyes. He was so adorable.)

Oh, really? Really, we ca- Oh! Well, that- that was easier then I thought it would be- !

Dear god, you're cute.

Yeah! Right! W- We’ll get all of that! Oh, this is amazing! I haven’t had a cat since- since, um, ever!

This'll be fun, won't it darling? I've always wanted a cat, if I'm being honest. (He chuckled.) Glad you're excited too!

…Yeah. Yeah, cats are- Yep. Always loved cats. Cute little things, are- aren’t they? Yyyyep.

(/srs)

H-