Jersey Girl, Lawyer, Constantly Wanderlusting

August 5th, 2023

After a wet July filled with continuous torrential downpours, August brought with it the promise of the sunshine that everybody craved. Taron and Liliana had quickly escaped the hustle and bustle of London at the first sign of sun to spend the week in Aberystwyth with their family. 

Liliana was excited to spend Matilda’s twelfth birthday with her. Matilda had started high school in September and had been so busy that Liliana hadn’t been able to spend as much time with her as she would have liked. Having a week to see her as often as she liked made her insides jump with excitement. 

The second day they were in Wales, it was a warm Saturday morning and Liliana woke up before Taron. He nestled into her back with his nose tucked into the back of her neck. Liliana lay in bed for a little while after she’d woken up just to enjoy Taron’s touch on her skin, but when she grew a little too warm, she climbed out and pulled on some leggings. 

Tina was already downstairs when Liliana slipped into the living room, and she turned her attention away from the TV to smile at Liliana. 

‘Good morning, honey. Sleep well?’ 

Liliana nodded. ‘I did, thank you. Taron’s still sleeping but I don’t think it’ll be too long until he’s awake.’ 

‘You came downstairs,’ Tina chuckled. ‘I give him a solid fifteen minutes before he comes in here looking for you.’ 

‘I was going to say more like ten. I had to try so hard to pull myself away from him. I’m going to go make a cup of coffee. Would you like one?’ 

Tina shook her head softly and held her mug up. ‘I’ve got one already, lovely. Thank you though. I’ll come and chat to you in the kitchen, I’ve had a bit of an idea I want to run by you.’ 

Liliana walked through to the kitchen with Tina close behind her. She’d been at Tina’s house overnight countless times in the almost eighteen months that she and Taron had been together, but it wasn’t until that morning that she realised just how at ease she was there. 

She didn’t feel the need to tiptoe everywhere she went in fear of making too much noise with her steps. She didn’t stop in doorways to listen and make sure that nobody was in a room before she entered. 

And she felt completely free to make herself a drink or get something to eat without having to ask or feel like a burden. She let out a shaky breath as she grabbed the mug that Tina had bought specifically for her, and she blinked back tears. 

‘So this plan?’ Liliana said to try and distract herself from the emotions racing through her. 

Tina settled herself on one of the dining chairs and watched Liliana glide around the kitchen effortlessly. ‘I was thinking, because the sun has finally decided to make an appearance and because I want to celebrate getting to spend the entire week with my two oldest babies, what if we have a barbecue this afternoon?’ 

Liliana’s heart swelled at Tina calling her one of her babies, and she turned to her with an emotional smile. ‘That sounds really lovely. Taron and I could go to the shops if you needed? It wouldn’t be a bother.’ 

‘No, it’s okay,’ Tina insisted. ‘If you’re okay to watch the girls for me, I’ll go. Plus, if I’m being completely honest, I need Taron to clean the barbecue before we use it.’ 

Liliana let out a small chuckle. ‘I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to do that. I ought to be making him a drink too, huh? Considering it’s been five minutes since I got downstairs.’ 

‘It might be a good idea. Do you think Eliza would be okay with Matilda coming around today? She could spend the night too, if she’d like.’ 

The corners of Liliana’s lips curled up into a grin as she nodded her head. ‘That would be amazing. Thank you, Tina. But please let me give you some money towards the food and anything extra. It’s the least I can do for everything you’ve done for Taron and me recently.’ 

Tina shook her head firmly. ‘Nope. I won’t take money from you, Lili. It’s what family does.’ 

‘Exactly. Family helps each other out. Let me give you the money for the crisps and things at least then.’ 

‘Liliana Esme,’ Tina chastised lightly. Liliana looked down sheepishly and it took her a short while to finally look back up at Tina. 

‘Sorry.’ 

Tina chuckled with a small wink. ‘There’s been this idea floating around in my head for a few months now but I didn’t know when, or how to bring it up in the best way.’ 

Liliana furrowed her brows as she put the used tea bag into the small caddy next to the kitchen. 

‘I love you just as much as I love Taron and the girls. If anything happened to you, I would be beside myself. You are amazing, and I wish you’d had the grown up you needed in your life when you were little. I’ve been thinking…if you feel comfortable enough, this is, that you could maybe call me mum? You absolutely do not have to, I just thought…oh I don’t even know, I just thought it might be nice.’ 

Liliana’s breath stopped momentarily as a rush of contrasting emotions filled her mind. Tina had been more like a mum to Liliana throughout her teenage years than Eliza had, and she’d accidentally slipped and called Tina ‘mum’ on a few occasions. But knowing that she had Tina’s blessing–that she would finally be able to call someone mum again, and knowing that she had a mum who loved her, it sent something weird zapping through her body and she couldn’t control the emotion as she wasn’t quite sure what it was. 

‘That’s truly only if you feel comfortable though,’ Tina continued. She could sense the difference in Liliana’s demeanour and wanted to diffuse anything before it got too bad and Liliana shut down. The last thing Tina wanted to do was upset Liliana. ‘I wouldn’t ever want you to do something that makes you feel uncomfortable. 

‘It’s just…I want you to have a mum that you feel safe with. I want you to have a mum that loves you how you deserve to be loved, because my god you deserve to be loved, Liliana. Anyway, would Matilda prefer hot dogs or beef burgers for the barbecue? I’ll be getting cheese and doing some fried onions. If she’s anything like you, I’ll be buying Tesco out of onions.’ 

Liliana breathed out a slightly teary laugh. She was thankful for the sudden change in subject. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to call Tina mum. If anything she would have loved to. There was just something holding her back. 

Things with Taron were perfect, to put it swiftly, but she knew just how quickly things changed in her life; how quickly things went bad. The last thing she wanted was for her to finally feel comfortable enough in a family for it all to be pulled from under her. It had happened before, and she swore that she wouldn’t let it happen again. 

‘You may need to buy Tesco out of onions. Chances are she’ll probably have one of each. She isn’t fussy, bless her. You could put any food in front of her and she would give it a go. I don’t know where she got that from, I was so fussy when I was younger.’ 

‘You weren’t fussy,’ Tina said seriously. ‘You just hadn’t had the chance to try a lot of foods when you were younger so you were nervous to sway away from what you knew. I never had an issue with you trying new things. But if she likes both, I’ll make sure there’s both. The girls are the same. I’ll get Taron to clean the barbecue when he comes downstairs and we’ll be good to go. I’m surprised he hasn’t come down yet, it’s been ten minutes.’ 

As if on cue, Taron strolled into the kitchen with his arms stretched above his head. He yawned as he made his way over to Tina to kiss her on the cheek. 

‘Morning, mam. I heard my name. What are you talking about me for?’ 

Tina looked at Liliana and they shook their heads simultaneously with small laughs that made Taron look between them with raised eyebrows. 

‘I bet I didn’t,’ he laughed as he stalked towards Liliana. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her lips gently. ‘You came downstairs without me.’ 

‘Unlike some, I wake up early and don’t want to spend all day in bed,’ Liliana chuckled playfully before she kissed Taron again quickly. ‘Your mum suggested that we have a barbecue this afternoon. We’re going to watch the girls while she runs to Tesco and I’m going to call Matilda soon and see if she wants to come. Eliza won’t have a problem with it.’ 

Taron twisted his body until his hips rested against the worktop. He wrapped an arm around Liliana’s waist and tucked her into his side before he grabbed her mug of coffee to steal some. 

‘Oi,’ Liliana chastised with wide eyes, ‘that’s mine, you bugger. There’s a mug behind you that I made for you.’ 

‘Yours always tastes nicer,’ Taron shrugged. ‘A barbecue sounds amazing though. Do you need me to clean it then, mam? It’s not been used for…I don’t even know how long. The chances are it’s a right mess and will need a good scrub.’ 

Tina licked her lips as she stood to put her empty mug in the sink next to Taron. ‘Funny you should ask,’ she said playfully. 

Taron shook his head in fake disbelief. ‘I knew I heard you talking about me. I’ll get it cleaned this morning for you so it can sit for a while before I light it. Can I put towards the shopping? I don’t like the idea of you buying everything.’ 

‘I already told Liliana that I won’t accept any money from the two of you for it. You are my babies and I want to treat you. Am I okay to leave the girls with you now? They’re due to be waking up soon but I have a feeling Tesco will be packed if I leave it much longer.’ 

‘That’s fine,’ Liliana said quietly before she leaned up to kiss Taron’s cheek. ‘I’m going to go and call Matilda. I’ll be right back, babe.’ 

***

As Taron had thought, the barbecue was in need of a deep clean. It wouldn’t take much to get it clean but Taron got the power washer out to help speed things up. In a feeble attempt to stop his t-shirt from getting wet and dirty, he pulled it away from his body and threw it just inside the back door where it would be sage. 

While he cleaned, Liliana and the three young girls all laid out on blankets on the grass together. The three younger girls played on Taron’s Nintendo Switch while Liliana read a book. After working on her second book for so long, it was nice to read for pleasure rather than for work. She’d made sure to pack multiple books for their week away so that she wouldn’t run out of reading material. 

Liliana read her book until Taron rubbed his palms on the back of his jeans to dry them off somewhat. He’d distracted her so well that when Matilda scooted closer to her, she hadn’t flinched. It wasn’t until Matilda tapped her on the leg twice that Liliana diverted her attention away from her boyfriend to her little sister. 

‘Thank you for letting me come,’ Matilda said quietly while she hugged Liliana from the side. 

Liliana turned to her and smiled fondly. For all of their differences, they were still so alike. They had the same personality, and Liliana could feel the love that radiated from Matilda in the small moments. 

‘You are so welcome, Little Bug. Are you excited to start year eight in September? I can’t believe that you’re already in your second year of high school.’ 

‘I’m a little nervous. Year seven was fun but the teachers have said we’re really starting to get into things this next year.’ 

‘Year eight is a little harder than year seven.’ Liliana wasn’t the type of person to sugar coat anything when it came to Matilda. She wanted her to know that things could be hard, and then give her ways around making it easier. ‘But it will go by so fast and you are so smart that you won’t even be able to tell the difference. Before you know it, you’ll be in year eleven and doing your GCSEs. High school can be hard, and I don’t want you to let anybody tell you otherwise. 

‘And people can be awful, trust me on that one. But you are so headstrong, and so incredibly smart that I know you’re going to do amazing. If anybody starts to give you trouble–students or teachers–let me know. Taron and I went to that school and most of the teachers we had are still there and I can talk to them. Mr Francis, he could probably tell you some stories.’ 

‘He’s my English teacher!’ Matilda exclaimed happily. ‘He’s always really fun.’ 

‘That sounds like Mr Francis. He was Taron and me’s English teacher too. He caught us passing notes one day and I don’t think I will ever live that down.’ 

Matilda’s eyes widened in glee. ‘I’m going to ask him about you both in September. Hey, Lili? Do you think that you and Taron will ever get married?’ 

Liliana took a deep breath and moved her attention back to Taron. His back tensed as he cleaned and Liliana couldn’t help but want to run her hands down the length of it and let them settle just inside the waistband of his jeans. She shook her head before her daydream turned into something erotic and turned back to Matilda. 

She leaned in close and whispered, ‘I don’t know, Tilly, but I hope we do. I love him a helluva lot and it would be nice to be married to him.’ 

‘Would you have kids?’ 

‘I don’t know, Til. That’s something that Taron and I would have to talk about one day. Why? Do you want us to get married and have babies?’ 

Matilda nodded. ‘Yeah. I’ve always wanted a brother. And who doesn’t love babies?’ 

Liliana chuckled and hugged Matilda to her side. Though she kept her eyes on Taron. Matilda had planted a thought in Liliana’s mind and it had turned into a whole daydream about one day being able to call Taron her husband. The thought made her insides turn to mush and she couldn’t hold back the grin that took over her face. 

Unbeknownst to anyone else in the garden, Taron had heard Matilda’s question and had strategically taken a break from using the power washer in the hopes that he would hear how Liliana answered. Taron had known since March of the previous year that he wanted to spend the rest of his time on Earth with Liliana. 

In the April of 2022, he had designed and bought a ring that he hoped she would love, ready for whenever Liliana was comfortable enough to take the next step and solidify their relationship further. 

The past eighteen months had been utter bliss for Taron. He finally had the woman of his dreams and his best friend all rolled into one. But he knew that Liliana still faced her inner demons every day and he was willing to wait as long as she needed before he asked her the most important question. 

A couple of months after their trip to Scotland, Liliana had moved in with him and that was enough for Taron. Liliana was the first person he saw when he woke up, and the last person he saw when he went to bed. If they lived like that for the rest of their lives without the titles of husband and wife, he was sure that he wouldn’t have minded. 

Five months prior, when they celebrated their one year anniversary, he had casually brought up the idea of marriage but Liliana had been hesitant. She had drawn in on herself again and Taron knew that it was too much too soon. He apologised for bringing it up and made it up to her again and again that night, whispering sweet nothings into her ear continuously. 

He had hoped that the idea of marriage wouldn’t scare Liliana so much, and he’d come up with a tentative plan to propose to her in November. It would be the two year anniversary of when they reunited at Liliana’s first book launch. But Taron carried the ring with him wherever he went, more so that he didn’t forget where he had hidden it, but also because he was worried about how Liliana might react if she saw it. 

The second he heard Liliana tell Matilda that she wanted to marry him, he thanked his lucky stars that he’d taken the ring to Aberystwyth with him and that it was stashed in the bottom of his suitcase where there was no risk of Liliana coming across it. He decided to seize the moment, and a plan started to form in his head. 

Liliana and Matilda had continued to whisper while Taron had his epiphany, and luckily they hadn’t noticed that he’d stopped cleaning. He closed the lip of the barbecue softly so that it didn’t make too loud of a noise. 

‘Well, I believe it will do for our spur of the moment party this afternoon.’ 

Liliana looked up at Taron and smiled happily, ‘Great job, babe. It looks clean enough to eat off of!’ She winked at him and he gave her a sarcastic look while he planted his hands on both hips and wiggled them joyfully. ‘You are something else.’ 

‘You got that right, baby. I’m going to go and get cleaned up and put my top back on before I join in on all the fun you four are having. Do any of you want a drink while I’m inside?’ 

‘Can you bring us all another can, please? Thank you.’

Taron went back into the house and continued to work on his plan to get Liliana alone for a little while. He hoped that if he timed it right, they could be back at the house to celebrate with everyone before the barbecue was in full swing. 

He bounded up the stairs two at a time and changed into a pair of shorts and a new t-shirt before he grabbed the ring from his suitcase. Before he left the bedroom, Taron checked in the mirror to make sure that the outline of the small, velvet box wasn’t obvious. 

As luck would have it, Tina walked in the front door as Taron got to the bottom of the stairs. She jumped a little but chuckled when she saw that it was only Taron. 

‘God you have a way of sneaking up on me,’ she laughed. 

‘It was totally not on purpose,’ Taron laughed. ‘Let me help you with these bags. What did you buy, woman? They’re heavier than the girls.’ 

‘Hush your mouth, child. Though I may have gotten carried away with snacks. So the chances are we’re eating all of this over the next few days.’ 

‘That sounds like a plan to me. I actually need your help with something.’ 

‘Sure, baby. What do you need?’ 

Tine looked at her son with a puzzled look plastered on her face. She could tell that Taron was up to something but she couldn’t fathom what it could possibly be. He put the bags he carried down on the table and then turned to his mum fully. 

He checked the back garden to make sure that none of the girls were on their way inside before he stuffed his hand into his pocket and gripped the small box that he’d kept well hidden for almost two years. 

‘I happened to overhear Liliana telling Matilda that she hopes that we get married one day. And I figured, why not ask her today?’ He pulled the box out of his pocket and snapped it open to show his mum the ring. ‘This wasn’t the plan but I can’t wait any longer. It’s been such a long time coming. She’s the one, mum. Liliana is the one that I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.’ 

Tina’s jaw was on the floor and she had tears in her eyes. It wasn’t a surprise that Taron wanted to propose. She’d known how Taron felt about Liliana for years, but she hadn’t had a clue that he already had a ring. 

‘I was going to tell you that I planned to propose but I just can’t wait any longer.’ 

‘Oh my goodness, this is amazing. My baby boy is going to propose!’ Tina’s voice got louder and Taron immediately turned to the back garden. 

‘Mam,’ he shushed her through gritted teeth. 

‘I’m sorry, honey, this is just so exciting! What do you need my help with?’ 

Taron closed the box and stuffed it back in his pocket so that there wasn’t a risk of anybody else seeing it before the time was right. ‘I need you to distract Rosie, Marie and Matilda while I get Liliana up to Constitution Hill. I thought it only fitting that I ask her there. It’s one of the most important places to us.’ 

Tina nodded in understanding and pulled Taron in for a long hug. ‘Of course, that would be perfect. And leave it to me, I’ll make sure the youngest are good while you’re gone. I’m so proud of you, little boy. And I’m so happy that Liliana is ready for forever. I told her that she can call me mum if she wants to and she got emotional. She’s really starting to open up more and I’m so happy.’ 

‘I think she’s finally ready to accept that she’s part of a family now. I just want to make it official. I’m going to go and get her. We won’t be too long, promise.’ 

‘Take your time, Taron.’ 

‘Thanks, mam. I love you.’ 

‘I love you too.’ 

Taron hugged his mum once more before he walked to the back door and admired the four girls at the top of the garden. He slowly made his way over towards them. 

‘Hey, Love Bug, come here for a second,’ Taron called to Liliana as he neared where she rested on the grass. He opened his arms and Liliana automatically stepped into them when she got up. ‘Mum’s just got back from Tesco and it’s such a lovely day out. What do you say we got for a walk quickly? I was thinking about Constitution Hill. It’s been so long since we’ve been up there.’ 

Liliana gave Taron the same puzzled look his mum had and asked, ‘But what about the barbecue? Surely we could help your mum get everything ready? She’s already done so much by doing the shopping on her own. I can’t leave her to prepare everything on her own too.’ 

‘She had mentioned asking the girls to help her prepare everything, and you know how much they all love to help out in the kitchen. Especially when Matilda is here.’ 

Liliana was still visibly sceptical, but she couldn’t deny that she would love some alone time with Taron. ‘Sure, babe, that sounds like a great idea. But let’s take the funicular up so we aren’t gone too long. I would still like to help your mum prepare some stuff.’ 

‘My thoughts exactly,’ Taron smiled as he leaned down to kiss Liliana. ‘Come on, let’s get going.’ 

He wrapped his arm around Liliana’s shoulder and walked them towards the garden gate that led them down the side of the house and to the street. Matilda looked up at Liliana and the crease in her brow was obvious even from where Liliana was. 

‘We’re just going to take a quick walk up the hill. We’ll be back before the barbecue starts, I promise,’ Liliana assured Matilda. 

Matilda smiled and gave her a small wave goodbye before going back to playing games with the other two. Liliana waved at Tina as they passed the kitchen window. She could have sworn that Tina winked at her when she passed by, but the sun was streaming in through the window so Liliana thought that it must have been the sunlight getting in her eyes. 

***

Liliana had clocked the grey clouds making their way to town before Taron had, but she was sure the forecast hadn’t predicted rain so she hadn’t mentioned anything. Though she wished she had when she felt the first drops of rain hit her skin. Taron groaned loudly and grabbed her hand to pull her into the nearest empty doorway. 

He pushed her against the wall softly and looked down at her with so much love that Liliana could physically feel her heart pulling towards Taron’s. Her hands slid up his front until she could pull him closer to her by the neck. 

Her lips brushed over his and as she was about to pull away, Taron leaned forward and kissed her passionately. She sighed dreamily into him and held onto him tighter. When they had been caught in the rain and took shelter in a shop doorway all those sixteen years before, all Liliana had wanted was for Taron to kiss her. 

Liliana smiled into the kiss and Taron copied. He thought the same thing and without needing to use words, they gave each other what their younger selves wanted. 

‘Do you think they’d be happy?’ Liliana asked when they pulled apart to catch their breath. 

‘Who?’ 

‘Our eighteen year old selves. Can you imagine telling them that in sixteen years they would be back hiding from the rain but happily kissing one another because they were in a relationship and had been for over a year?’ 

Taron thought for a moment as he held Liliana close. The rain had stopped already but they made no moves to continue their walk. He let his hands trail up to Liliana’s waist where he held her against him. He just hoped that she wouldn’t reach her hands down too low where she would feel the ring box nestled safely in his pocket. 

‘I think they’d be annoyed that it took us so long to say something to one another,’ he said with a small smile. ‘But then I think they would be so happy. I know younger me would be. All I wanted that day was to kiss you.’ 

‘All I wanted was for you to kiss me.’ 

‘Then this is for younger us,’ he smiled before he leaned down to plant another kiss to Liliana’s welcoming lips.

***

Thankfully the rain hadn’t stopped the funicular and it was running when they got to the bottom of Constitution Hill. Liliana climbed in first and took a seat on the small bench to the left. Taron squeezed in next to her and put his arm around her shoulder happily. 

‘Thank you for indulging me, Lil. I love spending time with everyone at home but I wanted a little bit of uninterrupted alone time with you.’ 

Nobody else stepped onto the funicular and as it started to carry them up the hill, Taron leaned in and kissed Liliana. It was deep and passionate, and the passion behind it caught Liliana off guard momentarily. Though she leaned in and kissed him back just as fervently. It didn’t matter how much time passed, kissing Taron was still her favourite feeling in the world. 

‘Thank you for suggesting this, T,’ she panted when Taron pulled away. ‘I agree, it is very nice to have some alone time with you. No funny business though, we are still in public and the ride up is only a few minutes.’ Liliana wagged a finger at Taron and he put his hands up in surrender with a devilish grin. 

‘I wouldn’t dream of it, Love Bug. But there’s nothing saying we can’t have a cheeky make out session, right?’ Taron winked at Liliana and leaned in to kiss her again. 

By the time they pulled apart, they were nearing the top of the hill. Taron grabbed Liliana’s hand as he stepped out so that he could help her climb out of the carriage safely. She thanked him softly and leaned her hand on his shoulder as they walked. 

The closer they got to the edge of the hill, the more Taron’s nerves started to hit him. His throat got dry and his hands had started to shake. He hoped that if Liliana could feel the shake, she would think that he was a little on the chillier side. The drop in temperature at the top of the hill worked in his favour. 

Liliana pulled away from Taron and walked towards the edge faster than Taron. The views never failed to amaze her and the second she saw the entire bay, her lips curled into a smile and she took a deep breath. Her love for Aberystwyth grew once again when she’d started to go back with Taron. She no longer dreaded being there because she knew that she would be with the people who loved her the most. 

The sunshine that had come back quickly after the rain had stopped, and by the time that they got off of the funicular, nobody would have known that it had been raining ten minutes previously thanks to the almost cloudless sky that had taken over. 

Liliana towed Taron in the direction of their spot while she soaked up the sunshine, her head tilted up to get as much vitamin C as she could. They had never officially declared what part of the hill was their spot, but they both knew. They had spent countless hours up there talking about life while watching the clouds. 

It was where Liliana had felt the safest when she was a teenager, and it was where they had realised that they had fallen for each other all those years ago. Liliana stood right at the edge and looked out at the sea. Small waves crashed against the bottom of the hill and Liliana matched her breathing to each crash. 

There was a faint smell of seaweed in the air and the Y Consti cafe behind them wafted the smell of freshly ground coffee into the air. Taron stepped next to Liliana and took her hand in his. They stood and stared out at the sea for a moment, taking in the warm breeze and the few fluffy clouds that dotted the sky. 

As Liliana was about to tell Taron that she was enjoying the moment with him, she felt him tug on her hand. When she turned to face him, he was lowering himself onto his left knee. He took the ring box from his pocket and Liliana’s breath caught in her throat. 

‘Taron,’ she managed to choke out as she squeezed his hand tightly. Tears had already found their way to her eyes and she couldn’t help the ones that fell down the length of her cheeks. 

‘Don’t say anything yet,’ he said quickly before he gulped. ‘Please. I want to say this before I forget anything I want to say.’ 

Liliana nodded, allowing Taron the room to say whatever he needed to. Though she knew what was coming. Her heart thumped rapidly deep within her chest and tiny drops of sweat started to build on the small of her back as the anticipation of what was about to happen poured over her. 

When Matilda had asked her earlier in the day if she was going to marry Taron, Liliana hadn’t expected for Taron to propose to her that day. Things started to fall into place as she watched Taron. She’d not taken notice of it before but she should have realised that Taron had stopped cleaning at the right time, and then the next thing she knew, he whisked her away to their spot and he was on one knee in front of her. 

She swiped away the tears that had started to fall so that she could look at Taron clearly, but she couldn’t wipe them away fast enough. They were falling freely down her cheeks and she saw a couple of people out of the corner of her eye watching the scene unfold in front of them. 

‘It has been almost sixteen years since I said goodbye to you on that train platform,’ Taron started through a shaky breath. ‘When the train pulled out, I remember wondering if I was ever going to see you again. It was like I was losing the thing that mattered the most to me. When I got home, I sat in your chair and I just cried. I didn’t want you to leave, but I didn’t know if I was allowed to say anything. I remember thinking that I’d lost you for good.’ 

Taron paused and took a deep, shaky breath. Liliana wanted nothing more than to reach out and cup his cheek, to pull him into her body and hold him until the end of time. She wanted to be the one to look after him. But she held back so that he could continue in his own time. Liliana was in no rush. They had the rest of their lives to look forward to. 

‘Then one morning when I was checking my mail, I found an invitation to a book launch. The second I read the name on top, Liliana Esme, I could feel the hole in my heart shrink a little.’ 

Liliana could remember making the guest list for the book launch as if it were only yesterday. She’d been asked to give a list of names of people who meant the most to her. When Taron’s name popped into her mind, she couldn’t decide what to do. It had already been over a decade since she’d last seen him, and a whole lifetime had occurred in that time. 

She knew that it was a long shot that he would turn up, but she invited him anyway. And she would send that invite again just to have Taron by her side again. 

‘You have always been my safe space, Lil, and I have loved you since we were eighteen years old. I wake up every morning and fall in love with you even more. The hole in my heart healed when I saw you again, and every day with you makes the scar grow smaller. 

‘These past eighteen months with you have been the best of my life. It’s been a continuous adventure and I can’t wait to relive every single one for the rest of my life. I have loved dancing in Washington Square Park with you; eating croissants on a balcony in the middle of Paris; swimming in the Mediterranean Sea; running into the sea down there in the middle of the night in just our underwear.’ 

Liliana laughed through the tears that streamed freely down her face, and she held Taron’s hand tighter, if that were even possible. A stray tear fell down Taron’s cheek and Liliana leaned forward to wipe it away with her free hand. Taron leaned into her touch and let the corner of his lips turn up into a gentle smile. 

‘Liliana, you are the strongest person I know, and the love that you show everyone around you knows no bounds. You love so hard, and with everything in you. Yet you struggle to love yourself, even now. It’s almost as though you are so busy loving everyone else that you forget to share that love with yourself. 

‘I want to be the person who shows you love when you don’t feel like you can show it to yourself. I do not want you to ever feel the way you felt growing up. You’ve had me in your corner forever, but I am going to prove to you that I’m not leaving that corner. Not for one second. On your hardest days, I will be there. On days where we’re frustrated with one another, I will be in your corner. I will be in your corner no matter what. 

‘I want you to feel loved every second of every day. And one day, I hope that you’ll have children in your corner. Children that you brought into the world. That…we brought into the world.’ 

Liliana took a deep breath. The thought of children wasn’t as scary as she would have imagined, but she was nowhere near ready to think about it yet. Though she knew Taron wouldn’t push anything, ever. 

‘You are going to make an amazing mum one day, Lil. I have no doubt about it. I love you more than I ever thought it possible to love someone. You are still my safe space, my guiding light, my strength on my weakest days, and my warmth on my coldest days. I want us to be a family. I want us to start a family that will always show you love. ‘

Taron took another shaky breath and looked up at Liliana. His eyes were steady as they fixated on Liliana’s, and his hands stopped shaking just enough that he was able to snap the ring box open. 

Liliana’s breath caught in the back of her throat as she looked at the delicate ring in front of her. It was everything she could have imagined and so much more. The sapphire and diamond ring glistened beautifully in the sun that shone down around them. 

The smile she gave Taron was so big that it hurt her cheeks and she could barely see in front of her. But her smile told Taron everything he needed to know. She was ready. Liliana was ready to start the next chapter of her life. She was ready to be a wife, ready to take on the world with Taron, and ready to open up her life to him wholly. 

This story is, by far, one of my favourite pieces of writing ever. Of course, I couldn't have done it without the incomparable @brayndilyn. She brought a story idea into my inbox and it turned into something much more than I would have ever thought it could be.

In the fourteen months that we have been planning, writing and posting RHW, Brayndi and I have grown incredibly close and this story has created what I believe to be a beautiful online friendship.

Liliana Esme has burrowed her way into my heart and I have loved being able to pour myself into her. When Liliana was pulled out of school to her mum telling her that her dad cheated in chapter two, that came directly from my life when I was eleven. It was cathartic to write that scene, and I look differently at what happened now.

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read Right Here, Waiting, and thank you to everyone who plans to read it now that it is finished. Your support means everything to me and the kind words that you share make me even happier. I appreciate you all.

May 20th, 2022

It was early evening by the time they drove into Fort William. Both Liliana and Taron were exhausted and wanted nothing more than to curl up in bed and sleep until the following day. They had been on the road for almost twelve hours, and they hadn’t slept much the night before. 

After spending so much time thinking about things that they could potentially do on their weekend excursion, it was nice that they were finally close enough to rest and spend a couple of days together just the two of them. They had nothing else to worry about except one another.

Taron had intended to surprise Liliana with the trip at the beginning of the month, but with conflicting work schedules and commitments that they couldn’t get out of, they weren’t both free at the same time until a couple of weeks later. He had planned for them to celebrate six months since they first reunited at the book launch. 

He also wanted to celebrate Liliana and her having handed in the first chapter of her second book. She had worked tirelessly to come up with a new concept, and had spent more time in meetings and at coffee shops writing than she had anything else. Taron wanted her to have a couple of days to relax and not have to think about anything.  

When he’d come up with the idea to surprise her with their first trip away as a couple, Taron had talked to his mum constantly trying to think of places to go for the weekend. It wasn’t until Liliana had suggested they head up to Edinburgh for the Christmas Markets that Taron thought of the Scottish Highlands. 

Liliana had spent some of the most pivotal years of her life in Scotland, but had never managed to take a trip to the Highlands like she’d always wanted to. She had mentioned to Taron that it was a place she would love to visit, so Taron knew that he’d found the perfect getaway for them. 

It also gave him the perfect excuse to introduce her to one of his favourite pastimes, weekends in the campervan where they could stop wherever they wanted to take in the views or have a break. 

He hadn’t wanted to tell Liliana about the trip until the day before they left, but when he’d left a tab open on his laptop on the one day that Liliana got home from work early and saw it a week before the trip, he had to tell her. Liliana couldn’t have been more excited if she tried. 

For days she researched things that they could do, and the best places to eat. They were only going to be in Scotland for three days but she wanted them to have options and to know where things were so that they didn’t have to spend much of their time looking for places to eat. 

The closer the trip got, the more Liliana’s excitement grew. She kept looking at photos of places where they could park the campervan and she would show Taron each of them. When she wasn’t looking at photos, she was looking up the best service stations that they could go to on the drive for bathroom breaks and to buy more snacks to get them through. 

On the morning that they left, Taron made sure that they had enough fuel to get them a decent way up the country and made all of the necessary checks to the campervan so that they knew they would be safe, and Liliana made them both a flask of coffee to help them stay awake on the journey. 

They left the flat at six thirty that morning but didn’t pull into the Morrisons car park in Fort William until almost six in the evening. Taron had hoped to get there a couple of hours earlier, but on their lunch stop, they ate and then decided to have a quick nap to refresh themselves for the afternoon stint of driving. 

The nap wasn’t enough to stop them from being exhausted when they got to Scotland. Liliana couldn’t imagine how much more tired Taron was than her, as he’d been the sole driver. Many of the stops had been so that he could stretch his legs and gain feeling in his bum that had gone numb multiple times. 

A little while before they got to Fort William, Liliana had compiled a list in her phone of things that they should buy to put them on for the weekend. Taron let her take charge in the shop, following her around as she put food in the trolley. 

‘So we’re only getting stuff for breakfast and lunch?’ Liliana asked as they got to the sausages. 

‘Yeah,’ Taron nodded. ‘I was thinking we could grab pizza on the way to our first stop tonight, and then tomorrow we could go to a pub or something. Then Sunday we’ll be on the way back so we’ll be getting food on the road.’ 

‘Fair enough. Do you have a gas cooker or something in the van?’ 

‘Yep. But the pans in the van are quite small.’ 

‘That’s fine.’ Liliana grabbed a pack of sausages from the fridge and started to head towards the bread section. ‘Sausage sandwiches for breakfast tomorrow? We could use the leftover sausages to make that hash that I cook and you love?’ 

Taron’s eyes lit up and he nodded dramatically. ‘We could have that for breakfast on Sunday before we set off home? That way we’ve got something hearty in us. There’s some spices and stuff already in the cupboard too.’ 

‘That sounds like a plan. I just need some tinned potatoes and a tin of beans then and that’s breakfast sorted.’ 

They continued around the shop getting bits that they would need, and a few extras that they could enjoy. Liliana grabbed some marshmallows and digestive biscuits. Having not had S’mores in years, she felt it only fitting that they have them at least once while they were away. 

While Liliana was looking at bottles of wine, Taron slyly put a bottle of Champagne in the trolley underneath the rest of the food. He knew that Liliana wouldn’t pay attention to anything that happened at the tills so she wouldn’t see it until he wanted her to.

Taron had already planned where they were going to stop that first night, and it was only a short drive to get there. Once they were a safe distance away from the side of the road, and in an area where it was legal to park overnight, Taron opened the back doors of the campervan so that they could eat while looking out at the River Lochy. 

Liliana grabbed two plates from the storage box and plated their pizza. The bottom of the pizza boxes were covered in grease from the pizza and she didn’t want them to stain the bed sheets. 

As they lounged on the bed eating, they enjoyed the gentle breeze that floated across the water and into the van. A few leaves that had fallen to the ground danced around in tiny swirls before they landed on the water and drifted to waters unknown.

Liliana rested her head against Taron’s shoulder once she’d finished her pizza, and Taron let his hand move to her knee where he squeezed it gently. 

‘Thank you for this, my love,’ she said softly as a leaf found its way into the campervan. 

‘You are more than welcome, Love Bug. What do you think? Should we make a campfire tonight? It’s still quite early and the sun will set soon so we’ll have plenty of time to relax and enjoy it?

‘I meant it that I wanted you to have this weekend to relax. I want us to be able to spend forty eight uninterrupted hours of us. You, me, the waters of Scotland, the campervan, sex. Lots and lots of sex.’  

Liliana let out a laugh before she leaned up to press her lips to Taron’s. His tongue ran along her bottom lip and she granted him access, twisting so that she could climb over him and straddle his lap. 

Taron chuckled into the kiss as his hands roamed down to grip onto Liliana’s bum. She gasped into his mouth and he swallowed it whole, leaning forward just enough that Liliana had to wrap her arms around his neck to hold herself upright. 

Pulling away just enough to rest her forehead against Taron, Liliana moved her hands to cup his neck softly. ‘A bonfire sounds good.’ 

‘All of that and all you got out of it was that a bonfire sounds good?’ Taron questioned with a guffaw that filled the camper. Liliana basked in the sound, and wished that she could listen to it on repeat for all of eternity. ‘Really?’ 

‘The sex sounds alright too, I guess.’ Liliana teased Taron and she knew it worked when he squeezed the flesh of her behind. ‘Forty eight uninterrupted hours of sex with you?’ 

Taron nodded against her before he pecked her lips three times in quick succession. ‘Who else would you be having sex with?’ 

‘Nobody as good as you.’ 

‘Fuck, Lil, where have you been hiding all this time?’ 

Taron tensed the second the words left his mouth. Liliana tensed at the same time and pulled away from him slightly. But she remained on his lap, looking at him with an intense concentration that left Taron concerned and curious. 

It had been a while since any conversation relating to the time where they weren’t talking had been brought up. They’d gotten into a good routine of being able to ignore it, but Taron knew that mentioning hiding would have Liliana reeling and her feelings all over the place. 

He looked at Liliana who looked back at him. She bit the inside of her mouth and took a deep breath before reaching a hand up to cup his cheek. Taron immediately leaned in to the touch and Liliana smiled at him a little. She had tears in her eyes and Taron wished for nothing more than to be able to reword everything. 

‘Lil, I’m so sorry.’ 

‘It’s fine,’ Liliana sniffled through a tiny smile. 

Taron shook his head firmly. ‘It’s not fine, Liliana. I should have thought about what I was saying more. I didn’t mean it like-’ 

‘I know you didn’t. That’s why it’s fine.’

A tear managed to escape down Liliana’s cheek despite her best efforts to stop herself from crying. Taron wiped it away as fast as he could, and Liliana shook her head at him gently. 

‘I worried that coming to Scotland would bring up a lot of old memories for me. That’s why I went really crazy about looking at things that we could do and eat. I didn’t want to have a moment to think back to being a teenager and everything.’ 

‘Oh shit,’ Taron sighed. He pulled Liliana into his arms and rocked her softly. In all of his haste to plan the perfect trip for them, he hadn’t even thought about what being back in Scotland could do to Liliana and how she would feel. ‘I didn’t even think about that. I am so sorry. Do you want to go back home?’ 

Liliana shook her head with as much firmness as Taron had previously. She curled into him a little tighter but tilted her head up so that she could look at him. Her hand was still on his cheek and she could feel his heart beating against hers. 

‘Don’t be sorry. I promise I’m okay. I’m a little embarrassed because I’m emotional and trying to hold back the tears, but they aren’t the kind of tears that I expected.’ 

Taron’s eyebrows wrinkled in the middle and Liliana rubbed them away with the pad of her thumb. ‘How so?’ 

‘I expected being here to make me feel like the person I was back then. I felt small and unseen. My entire world came crumbling down when I got on the train. But it wasn’t my world of being at home. It wasn’t because I was leaving my family behind. It was because I was leaving you behind. You were my world, and leaving you broke me. 

‘It took a lot of therapy time to come to terms with everything I went through, as I’ve told you before. I’m not going into that because this is our holiday and I’m trying really hard not to be a party pooper right now.’ 

‘You could do no such thing,’ Taron whispered. He kissed the top of Liliana’s head and her eyes fluttered closed for a short second. ‘I mean it, if you want to talk about everything that happened, then by all means tell me. If you’d rather not, then you don’t have to.’ 

Liliana took a moment to respond. She looked out at the river and allowed her breathing to sync up with the slow current. Everything she said here would be whisked away by the breeze and the water. The thought alone made her feel a little better. 

‘I always wondered what it would be like to have you in Edinburgh with me,’ she continued after she was sure she wouldn’t cry any more. ‘Or what it would be like if I hadn’t left when I did. The past few months have been amazing and it makes me wonder if we would have admitted our feelings earlier if we’d have been together.’ 

Taron’s chest rose and fell against Liliana’s cheek as he looked out over the water. The sun had started to set and filled the campervan with a beautiful orange glow. 

‘I don’t know,’ he answered truthfully. ‘I was so scared to confess how I felt back then that I potentially wouldn’t have said anything in pure terror that you’d have laughed in my face.’ 

‘I would never,’ Liliana said quickly. 

‘I know but I wasn’t much to look at back then, was I?’ 

‘Yes, you were.’ 

Taron laughed as though he didn’t believe a word she was saying, and Liliana twisted again so that she could look at him face to face.

‘You were the most gorgeous boy in our year,’ she told him truthfully, her hands moving to cup his cheeks. ‘I didn’t look at any other boy but you. Nothing has changed in that respect.’ 

She laughed to herself and leaned forward just enough to capture Taron’s lip with her own. 

‘Don’t flatter me like that, Love bug.’ 

‘I wouldn’t dream of it.’ Liliana smiled up at him and kissed him once more before moving to straddle him again. ‘You were, and continue to be, the most beautiful man I’ve ever known. And it’s not just your looks, because you are stunning beyond belief, it’s how whenever we’re in a room full of people, you’re always already looking at me when I glance at you.’ 

‘It’s the way you send me songs when they remind you of me. It’s the way that you pull me into a dance whenever there’s music playing and we’re out, or when we’re at home. It’s the fact that you’re my best friend. 

‘It’s you driving me around on a night time when I’ve had a shit day and just need to cry. It’s the way you caught me when I fell. The way you kiss me like your life depends on it. 

‘It’s you buying books I love and reading them just so that you can talk to me about them. I know you didn’t think I knew, but I knew, and I love it. But most of all, it’s the fact that I know you’re here to stay. After everything we’ve been through, I know that you’re not going to let go of me just as much as I’m not going to run away again. 

‘There’s no genuine evidence for thinking that. Because we don’t know what’s going to happen. We don’t know what’s going to happen two days from now, or two years. But I believe it anyway. I love you.’ 

Taron blinked back the tears that had filled his eyes. Liliana cupped his cheeks and wiped the ones that fell away as she leaned forward to kiss his lips. Taron sniffled quietly while he held Liliana impossibly close to his body. 

Her heart beat hard against his chest, and his eyes fluttered softly down at her. She looked at him with big eyes as she continued to wipe away his tears. 

‘I’m sorry,’ she mumbled against his ear. ‘I didn’t mean to make you cry.’ 

‘They’re not sad tears.’ Taron sniffled again and moved Liliana so he could kiss her again. 

Her lips were soft against his and she granted him immediate access when he traced her lower lip with his tongue. Liliana ran her hands through the hair at the nape of Taron’s neck, and he roamed his hands down the length of her back until he cupped her bum again. 

Liliana moaned into his mouth and he chuckled softly, pulling her hips tightly over his. The response in his dick was almost instant, and Liliana ground against him on her own to try and get Taron to make the moans that had her weak at the knees. 

‘I can tell what you’re doing,’ he mumbled against her lips when he pulled away for breath. 

‘I am merely loving on my boyfriend,’ Liliana smirked, grinding her hips once more. Taron held her hips tightly to still her movements so that he could lean her backwards to lay on the bed. ‘I can tell what you’re doing, mister.’ 

‘Me? I am merely loving on my girlfriend.’ 

Liliana raised her eyebrows at Taron who simply winked at her before leaning to capture her lips once more. He was hard against Liliana’s core and she moaned into him when he moved their hips together. Taron loved the sounds that left her, and wished for nothing more than to be the one to make her moan that way for the rest of her life. 

‘Love on me all you want, T.’ 

‘Well if you insist.’ 

Liliana hadn’t realised just how small the campervan was until they attempted to undress one another in the space. Taron’s head hit the roof multiple times, and Liliana almost knocked over everything on the one shelf as she lifted her arms when Taron removed her top. 

In the end they decided against trying to be sensual and to just undress themselves to save from anymore injuries. They both laid on the bed and shimmied their bottoms and underwear off at the same time which made them both giggle like school kids. 

When they were naked, Taron tucked a piece of hair behind Liliana’s ear and let his fingers drift down her neck and to her collarbone where he leaned down to kiss. Liliana’s eyes closed shut and her hands found their way to Taron’s hair. She tugged it softly and Taron groaned delicately onto her skin. 

His lips planted kisses down her chest until he got to her breast. He let his tongue run around Liliana’s nipple before he sucked it into his mouth. Liliana moaned loudly and tugged his hair tighter. 

‘That feels so good,’ she whimpered when he took her other breast in his hand and pinched her nipple. ‘I need you, Taron.’ 

‘Patience, Love Bug. I want to take my time with you today. I haven’t had the chance to do that recently, and you deserve all of the love and care I can give you.’ 

Liliana peered down at him and protruded her lips into a small pout. Taron, used to her always begging for the end, was not deterred by her action.  

‘Not yet, sweet girl. Like I said, we have forty-eight uninterrupted hours of just us, and I am going to savour every single one of them.’ 

Taron continued his tour of Liliana’s body, kissing all of his favourite parts of her. Because that was all of her, it was a long, drawn out expedition that had Liliana moaning next to him. Taron loved every second of the journey, and he loved it more and more each day. 

By the time he got to the tops of her thighs, he was laid between her thighs and Liliana squirmed above him, but he took extra time licking and kissing her skin on his way to her centre. Though he never kissed exactly where she needed him to. 

He used one free hand to steady her squirming underneath him and the other to rub small, delicate circles into the thigh he wasn’t kissing and nipping. 

‘Taron, please. I need you, baby.’ Liliana begged Taron as the inferno grew hotter between her legs. She was desperate to feel the fullness of Taron inside her. It was her favourite feeling. 

‘I haven’t quite finished my worship of you. Now, if you please, stop squirming and let me continue this or I promise, it will take a lot longer than you’d like. I could do this all day.’ Taron looked up from between her thighs and grinned as though he were the devil. It was a sweet smile laced with desire and passion. 

‘You are such a tease, Egerton,’ Liliana whimpered above him. Her hands had found their way to his hair and she massaged his scalp, smirking to herself when he struggled to keep his eyes open. ‘But just know the next time I get my hands on you, you are getting the same treatment.’ 

She huffed in playful frustration before she pushed herself back into the covers to begrudgingly admit defeat. Taron only smirked at her with a wink so small it was almost unnoticeable. 

‘Oh, baby girl, I very much look forward to it.’ 

With Liliana still above him, Taron continued to kiss down her leg until he got to her ankle. The hand that had held her stomach trailed down her leg until he could squeeze her foot lovingly. Liliana sighed above him before tilting her head to look at him. 

Taron looked up at her through thick eyelashes and the sight was enough for Liliana to need to press her legs together to get some friction. But Taron stopped her, using his hand to anchor her legs apart. 

‘I don’t think so. You’re going to be a good girl and let me do this, or you don’t get to cum until I say you can.’ 

Liliana gulped as her eyes widened slightly. Her heart beat ten times faster in her chest as she looked at Taron. He watched her for a minute before he started to kiss back up her leg where he settled himself comfortably between them both. 

He held onto her thigh as he leaned down to press a kiss to her entrance. His nose brushed against her clit and Liliana’s legs jerked under him. Liliana’s hands gripped the covers by her side. The sensation sent her into overdrive and all the pent up emotion and teasing pushed her close to her release. 

Taron let his tongue run from her entrance to her clit where he licked and sucked at a pace that he thought would tease Liliana. But along with everything else she felt that night, it brought her orgasm on faster than she had been expecting. 

Liliana moaned above Taron and her hips lifted away from the mattress and into Taron’s face more. Taron grabbed onto her bum and held her in place as he continued to kiss and suck her core to help her ride the waves of her orgasm. 

He watched her chest rise and fall rapidly as she came down from the high, and he let his thumbs massage the sides of her thighs to help calm her down. 

When Liliana had come back down to earth finally, Taron moved himself up her body so that he could kiss her. Liliana tasted herself on his lips and her eyes fell closed. It was such an intimately erotic action and she couldn’t get enough. 

All of the teasing had affected Taron as well, and he was harder than he thought possible. He’d started to leak pre-cum and was getting increasingly uncomfortable the longer he waited to do the one thing he wanted to. His patience had worn thin and as he looked at Liliana, the desire was bright in his eyes. 

‘I’m not quite finished with you yet, Love Bug. Ready for another? Maybe two?’ 

Liliana nodded through a dazed look. ‘Always ready for you, my love.’ 

Taron lined himself up with Liliana’s entrance and let out a deep groan at the feeling that shot through his body. Liliana gripped the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss her again. He obliged and let his lips linger as he entered her. He pushed up into her so hard that the bed shifted and Liliana knocked her head on the metal wall that separated them from the cab. 

Liliana rubbed her head to ease the pain that formed while she let out a strained laugh. Taron’s eyes widened and he stilled inside her while he pulled his lips into his mouth. He tried to hold back a laugh while he placed his hand on top of Liliana’s. 

‘Are you okay?’ 

Liliana slapped Taron’s chest playfully. ‘You need to be more careful. There’s less room here than at home.’ 

‘You’re the one that jumped me in this tiny van.’

Liliana’s eyes widened and her mouth dropped open in shock. ‘Piss off. You know that you’re the one who started this.’ 

‘Touché,’ Taron laughed softly, leaning down to kiss Liliana once, twice, three times. ‘Are you sure you’re okay?’ 

Liliana nodded. ‘Yeah. Please move, you’re killing me here.’ 

Taron pulled out of her until only the tip of his dick teased her entrance. 

‘T, what are you doing? Stop teasing me and get on with it already,’ Liliana whimpered. She was so riled up from one orgasm already that having the full feeling of Taron buried inside her being snatched away so quickly made her need for him even stronger. She clawed at his back to hold him close. ‘Please.’ 

Taron leaned in close to her ear, grabbed a fistful of her hair and tugged it slightly while growling, ‘I told you before, be a good girl for me…or I won’t let you cum until I say so.’ 

Liliana had seen Taron take control with her before and she loved it, but he had never been so dominant. She didn’t think it was possible considering how sweet he was, but it was making her even more soaked. No matter how much she tried to squeeze her legs around Taron, he used his hips to keep them apart. 

His eyes were a deeper shade of green when he pulled away from Liliana’s ear, and she looked at him with a shaky breath. ‘I’ll be good, T, please let me cum.’ 

‘We shall see,’ Taron said as he cocked an eyebrow and slammed back into her at the same time. 

To keep her in place, Taron grabbed both of her wrists and pinned them to the pillow next to her head while he thrust in and out of her. Not having control of her hands normally would have made Liliana uncomfortable, but with Taron she felt safe and it turned her on more than she cared to admit. 

‘Fuck, Taron, that feels so good,’ she moaned loudly. Taron kept his pace but thrust into her so hard that she could feel him in her stomach.

Taron moved his hands from her wrists and intertwined their fingers instead, kissing her with a ferocity that caught him off guard just as much as it did Liliana. He knew that he wanted to coax at least two more orgasms out of Liliana before he reached his own climax, so he slowed his pace slightly and reigned himself in so he could last longer for her. 

He could tell that Liliana was close to her second orgasm thanks to the constant stream of moans that Taron adored so much. Her walls clenched around him and he kept the pace as he leaned down to kiss her once. 

‘That’s a good girl. Now, cum for me, Lil.’ 

It was unusual for Liliana to orgasm from penetration alone, but Taron’s commands had her coming undone for a second time. This second one was stronger than the first. Their hands were still intertwined next to her head and all Liliana could do was absorb the pleasure. She let out multiple, noise defying moans with some expletives mixed in. 

While it was unlikely with how remote the area they were in was, Taron leaned down to swallow her moans with kisses just in case someone was around and could hear them. The back doors of the campervan were still open and a chill breeze drifted in and whispered against their clammy skin, but they were so caught up in each other that they couldn’t care less. 

‘That’s my gorgeous girl.’ Taron continued to thrust through Liliana’s orgasm so that she had no time to recover. Watching her come undone underneath him made his entire body ignite in a fire he hadn’t known before. ‘Keep going.’ 

‘I can’t,’ Liliana whimpered pitifully. ‘I can’t.’ 

‘You can,’ Taron nodded. ‘I know you’ve got it in you. You could let go at least four more times.’ 

Liliana shook her head. 

‘You can. I know you can. Just give me one more, baby girl. Gimme one more like the good girl you are.’ 

Holding himself at bay through two of Liliana’s orgasms was not an easy feat for Taron and he now became a man on a mission, keeping his thrusts at a constant pace. Liliana moved her legs up to wrap them around Taron’s waist to pull him in deeper and to keep her knees from hitting the side of the van. 

‘Feels so good, T. You make me feel so good.’ 

‘Fuck, yes, Lil, you feel amazing.’ Taron could feel himself getting close to his own climax and he knew that it wouldn’t take long for Liliana to fall into her third orgasm of the night. He moved one of his hands down between them where they met to rub circles on her clit, knowing that it was the fastest way to get her going. 

Liliana wrapped her arms around Taron’s neck and arched her back off the bed so that they were chest to chest. She could feel the pleasure building in her core as Taron continued to rub circles into her clit and she let herself fall into an abyss of pleasure, shouting out Taron’s name. Her orgasm squeezed Taron and his own orgasm washed over him. He emptied himself inside Liliana and rode out both of their orgasms with a few final thrusts. 

Completely spent, they both laid there for a few moments, their breaths heavy and their skin sweaty and sticky. After a few moments, Taron very carefully flipped them over so that Liliana was laying on his chest. 

Taron landed a playful slap on Liliana’s bum and praised her, ‘Good girl, you took me so well. Told you that you could give me another.’ Liliana’s wits were still too scrambled to form a coherent thought so she just let out a few moans and mumbles while she nodded into his chest. Taron chuckled and kissed the top of her head. 

They laid together in complete silence, just letting the soothing sounds of nature surround them. Liliana couldn’t help but notice how peaceful the moment felt. By all accounts, she should have felt incredibly shy. She just had three orgasms with the doors of the campervan open, while Taron commanded her and she enjoyed it. She had never known this side of her, but instead of feeling awkward, she only felt safe and loved. This was the life she was supposed to be living and it felt calm. 

After a few more moments of silence, Taron leaned his head up, ‘What do you say we just skip the bonfire tonight and get some sleep?’ 

‘We were going to have a bonfire? I thought you just wanted uninterrupted sex?’ Liliana looked up and winked at him as she said it. Taron chuckled softly and rubbed his hands up and down her back until Liliana drifted off to sleep in his arms. 

When Taron was sure that Liliana was fully asleep he moved her as gracefully as possible so he could get up and shut the campervan doors and close the curtains. Once that was done, he climbed back into the bed and pulled Liliana’s back to his chest and covered them both. She adjusted slightly and scooted her bum right up to his hips, but didn’t wake up. Taron shook his head to himself and whispered, ‘Sleep well, my love’ before drifting off himself. 

May 21st, 2022

Liliana woke to the sound of the rain that pelted against the roof of the campervan. She pulled the covers around her to keep out the chill that had made its way into the space despite the doors being closed and the curtains being drawn. Taron remained tucked tightly at Liliana’s back, and his light snores mixed with the rain lulled Liliana back to sleep. 

The rain had stopped by the time she woke up again. It was silent outside besides the rushing of water at a small stream that had formed off of the river, leading to the campervan. The silence was loud, and Liliana grabbed her phone in an effort to stop her mind from racing. 

She’d taken a series of photos the previous day of the drive through Scotland and she wanted to post them to Instagram, but before she could, she saw a post that stopped her in her tracks. 

In all of the excitement of getting to Fort William and spending time with Taron the previous day, she’d somehow forgotten that the new Harry Styles album had dropped and she’d missed it. For six weeks she had listened to As It Was on repeat and had done nothing but talk about her excitement for the full album. 

It was just past seven and Liliana knew that Taron wouldn’t be awake for another hour or so at least, and then the chances of him falling back to sleep were high, so she knew that she would have time to listen to the album the way she’d wanted to, song at a time with a short break between each one to really think about it.

When she opened Spotify to listen to the album, the rain started up again and created a gentle beat against the metal roof above her. The sound of the rain and the comfort of Taron being curled up into her back made for the perfect time to listen. 

Her earphones were in her bag and with Taron’s arms wrapped around her naked middle as tightly as they were, she knew that she wouldn’t be able to get them to listen. So she turned her volume down even more on her phone before she pressed play on the first song. 

The opening notes of the first song had her hooked immediately. It was upbeat and fun, and by the time Harry belted out ‘You know I love you, babe’, Liliana had a huge grin plastered on her face. She thought about the man who slept so peacefully behind her, with his breath tickling the back of her neck, and how much she loved him. 

The second song took her back to the beginning of the year when they spent many a late night talking on the phone. When they weren’t on a phone call, they were texting or just sending photos to one another to describe their evenings. Liliana had loved every second of that time. 

‘Now you’re in my life / I can’t get you off my mind’ had Liliana reeling. Two lines of a song had never summed up how she felt so perfectly. She wondered how Harry had managed to inject everything she felt into the album, and she was only two songs into the album. 

The first few songs had her bobbing her head softly and wiggling her feet to the beats of the songs. When Liliana’s phone lit up with a text message notification from Evelyn, she did a double take at the title of the song that just started. 

Matilda. 

It took a matter of seconds for Liliana’s emotions to get too much for her and for tears to stream down her cheeks. By the end of the song, her entire body shook as she sobbed. She tried her best to calm her breathing so that she wouldn’t wake Taron, and she had to pause the album so that she didn’t miss anything while crying. 

Liliana couldn’t quite comprehend how one song could make her feel so many conflicting emotions. For a second she was tempted to wake Taron so that she could talk through it with him, but he got so little time away from work and was always the first person to comfort her so she let him sleep for a little longer. 

She played the song for a second time so that she could be sure she heard it properly the first time. The second listen made her cry even more. It was a song that spoke to her on a visceral level, and she was unsure how she would ever be the same again after hearing it. 

When Harry crooned ‘You can let it go / You can throw a party full of everyone you know / You can start a family who will always show you love / You don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own’, Liliana’s breath caught in her throat. 

Taron had gone above and beyond for her for so long, and it took until then for Liliana to know just how badly she needed everything he’d offered her. She finally took the time to acknowledge that she was ready to accept everything he offered her, no matter how scary it was. 

One of her favourite quotes from university pops into her mind. ‘It doesn’t take a lot of strength to hang on. It takes a lot of strength to let go’. Listening to Harry tell her that she can let everything go made everything click into place. 

She’d spent so much of her life worrying that she’d been weak for leaving and running to Edinburgh. To Liliana, she had left the hard life to move on to a new life. But now she knew that wasn’t the case. It had taken strength to leave. 

Liliana stared at the curtains on the campervan. Tears still clouded her vision but she was a little more in control of her emotions by that point. She thought about everything that had happened with Taron, and what could still happen. 

Liliana was finally ready to open up completely. She wanted to start a new life with Taron, and to let all of the pain from her past go. The thought of being free from the guilt of leaving and not seeing Matilda made her shake a little in her spot. 

In the past few months, her relationship with Matilda had grown even more, and they were closer than ever. Liliana had bought Matilda her own phone so that she didn’t have to use Eliza’s to contact her, and they texted at least once a day, if not more. 

Liliana also accepted the fact that she could spend time without having to spend time near her mum too. The two weren’t mutually exclusive. Liliana could go to Wales and take Matilda out for the day. Eliza never had to be a part of her time with her sister. 

The final song in the album was yet another moment where Liliana stopped in her tracks, and her breath caught in her throat. Yet another song had Liliana wondering how Harry had managed to inject her life into it. 

‘Baby, you were the love of my life / Maybe, you don’t know it’s lost til you find it / It’s not what I wanted / To leave you behind / Don’t know where you’ll land when you fly / But baby, you were the love of my life’. 

Taron was the love of her life. They had only been dating for a couple of months, but everything from their past led Liliana to believe that she would never love anybody the way that she loved Taron. She hadn’t realised how much she loved him when she left for Edinburgh, until she was there. 

Now that she had him back, she wouldn’t let him go. Not if she could help it. Taron was everything Liliana had ever needed, and she was willing to do anything she could to show Taron that she wanted him and that she would love him with everything in her being. 

***

After an afternoon of hiking up Ben Nevis and an evening eating food in a local pub before they headed to their second stop off for the night, a bonfire by the water was just what Taron and Liliana needed to unwind. 

Liliana had listened to the album another two times during the day, once on her own when they were headed up a particularly difficult part of the mountain, and once with Taron. The entire time he listened to it, Taron looked at Liliana. 

He had just as many conflicting feelings as Liliana had the first time she’d listened. And when he heard Matilda for the first time, his shoulders dropped and he pulled Liliana into his body to hold her close. 

While they listened, he had whispered numerous times how much he loved her, and she’d reciprocated that love. It wouldn’t be the last time that they would listen to the album together. 

The heat from the bonfire warmed Liliana through to the bone as she looked over Loch Eil. It had grown chillier near the loch as the evening drew closed and nighttime ascended upon them. The moon shone bright in the sky and lit up the water’s surface with glitters of silver and white. 

It was silent except for the crickets in the hills across that surrounded them, and the breeze that still wrapped around the area as though it were a warm blanket. Liliana basked in the serenity she was bathed in while Taron added more sticks to the fire to keep it alight for a little longer. 

Liliana had grabbed blankets from the campervan that she and Taron could curl up in while they sat around the fire. She showed Taron how to make the best S’more and he ate so many that his stomach hurt. Liliana could only chuckle at him as she took another bite of her own with a huge grin on her face. 

‘Those are good,’ Taron smiled at her. He kissed her lips and then licked his clean from the melted marshmallow that had transferred. ‘I’m just going to go grab another drink. Do you want one?’ 

Liliana shook her head and held her mug up at him. ‘Still got some. Thank you though, babe.’ 

Taron nodded as he stood from his seat and walked over to the campervan. Rocks crunched under his feet with each step. Liliana watched as he went, and bit the inside of her cheek when he wiggled his butt at her. She tittered softly and turned back to the water as he climbed into the back of the camper. 

‘I’ve been thinking a lot about something,’ Taron said when he made his way back to Liliana a few seconds later. ‘I love you.’ 

‘I love you too,’ Liliana responded instantly. She never had to think about whether she loved him or not, it was just a fact. ‘But what’s got you thinking about that?’ 

Taron shook his head as he sat back down. He held his arm at the side of him and Liliana eyed it curiously. Taron ignored her glances and continued to talk. 

‘I’ve been thinking about us–don’t worry, nothing bad. It’s just…what you said yesterday really struck a chord. About me and how you just know that I’m here to stay? I realised I never answered anything you said.’ 

‘Yeah because you were too busy giving me three orgasms,’ Liliana mused. 

Taron smirked but quickly shook his head, ‘I could have made it four. Anyway, as I was saying, you are the best person I’ve ever known. You make me feel like the happiest version of me. And I honestly think that had it not been for our time apart, we wouldn’t be where we are now.’ 

Liliana smiled knowingly. ‘I know. I keep wondering what would have happened if I’d have stayed but I think we would have been stuck. I wouldn’t have admitted anything to you because I never would have gone through the things I did when I was in Edinburgh. I wouldn’t have gone to therapy and pieced everything together.’ 

‘I was so in love with you back then that I was scared I would have scared you away if I said anything. It took me losing you to realise how big of a pedestal I’d put you on back then. Not that I was wrong to, I mean, look at you.’ Taron paused to look Liliana up and down. Her cheeks grew a deeper shade of red and she pulled her lips into her mouth. ‘You are, and have always been, perfect. And you are by far the strongest person I have ever had the privilege of knowing.

‘When we listened to the album earlier, I listened and all I could think was, there’s this woman who has gone through more than I could ever comprehend and she’s still going. You’re so strong that you left and did what you needed to. Leaving made you stronger, and if I’m being honest, it made you an even better person. 

‘You’re no longer the person you were back then. You’re an adult who is whole. You know what you need in a person and I hope that I can be everything for you.’ 

‘You are,’ Liliana whispered as she wrapped her arms around one of Taron’s and rested her head on his shoulder. ‘You’re more than everything. Everything I’ve ever wanted and needed, you are.’ 

Taron beamed at her words and grabbed the champagne bottle that he had been hiding and popped the cork with a flourish. ‘I bought this yesterday to celebrate six months together and all of your achievements with the second book.’ He filled his cup and Liliana’s with champagne and raised it to toast her.

‘Cheers to you Liliana, and to us, I’m so glad that we found our way back to one another,’ Taron said sincerely. ‘You are the love of my life.’ 

April 14th, 2022

On Liliana’s final full day in Wales, she woke up filled with dread. She had put off talking to Matilda about everything until the last possible minute. Liliana had spent most of the week trying to ignore the fact that she was going to have to tell Matilda everything, and she’d done well to ignore the anxiety that crept up to her throat and threatened to cut off her breath. 

Matilda slept peacefully next to Liliana so she opened her notes app again and read through the things she’d jotted down the night before. Though it took only a second for Liliana to turn to her little sister and watch her sleep. Innocence dripped off of Matilda as she cradled her new teddy tightly in her arms and Liliana wondered if telling her was for the best. 

It was. She knew it was. It had been a long time coming and Liliana couldn’t go home without telling Matilda what she needed. There was no doubt that the guilt would eat her alive from the inside out. Her body shook with nerves as she went over everything in her head, and in her notes app again. 

When Matilda woke up, Liliana smiled down at her softly before pulling her in for a hug. 

‘Morning, Little Bug. Did you sleep well?’ Matilda nodded through a yawn as she rubbed at her eyes. ‘Good. I’m going to go and make some tea and toast for breakfast, would you like some? There’s still some Nutella in the jar we bought the other day.’ 

‘Yes please. Are you going downstairs to eat it today?’ 

‘Yeah we are. Come on, let’s go. Bring a blanket with you if you’d like.’ 

Liliana grabbed the hoodie of Taron’s that she had stolen before she left his flat and pulled it over herself as they made their way downstairs. Eliza and Hudson had already left for the day so Liliana felt comfortable enough to walk around the house without feeling like she had to check every room first. 

Matilda got comfortable on the sofa while Liliana walked through to the kitchen, which was still a mess from the get-together Eliza and Hudson had with a few of their friends the night before. Liliana planned to clean up after she’d told Matilda what she needed to. The last thing she needed was Eliza in a mood that evening. 

‘Hey, Tilly,’ Liliana smiled as she walked back through to the living room once their tea and toast was finished, ‘can I show you something after we’ve eaten?’ 

Matilda looked up at Liliana and nodded before she grabbed her plate of toast from her big sister. Liliana settled the mugs of hot tea on the table before she joined Matilda on the sofa, pulling her legs up under her bum so that she could get comfortable. She put the book she’d put in her pocket down next to her and took a deep breath. 

Breakfast seemed to go on forever, despite it only consisting of two slices of toast each. Liliana had tried not to cry as they ate, and she’d done well. Until Matilda saw the book and asked what it was and why it had Liliana’s name on the front. 

Liliana pulled the book onto her knee before she passed it to Matilda. The tears that she’d tried to hold back since waking up made an appearance and Liliana wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. Matilda looked at her with worry and tilted her head to look at her. 

‘Ana, why are you crying?’ 

Liliana took a deep breath to try and compose herself but it didn’t do much to calm her down. She wiped the new tears quickly and turned to look at Matilda fully. 

‘I know that I don’t come here as much as we would both like me to,’ she cried, gulping the lump in her throat after taking a shaky breath, ‘but I’m sure you’ve seen how mum acts around me. She doesn’t like me very much.’ 

‘Why doesn’t she treat you the way she treats me? She’s always really nice to me but she isn’t very nice to you.’ 

Liliana nodded. Matilda had always been observant but Liliana hadn’t realised just how much. Her heart broke thinking about how much Matilda had seen and heard over the years that Liliana had tried to keep to herself. She wondered if Matilda had figured out what happened at Christmas, and the thought alone made Liliana choke out a sob. 

‘I think that’s something I’ll never be able to really give you an answer to, little girl. It’s been the same since I was around your age. My dad did something not so nice to mum when I started high school and things changed between mum and me. That’s what this book is about.’ 

She tapped the cover and wiped even more tears before continuing. ‘It’s about my life. From the age of twelve to eighteen, when I took things into my own hands. The main character is called Tilly, because you’re the reason that I’m still holding on. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t ever come back to Wales. 

‘I need you to know that I love you more than I’ve ever loved anybody else before. You’re my baby sister, and you deserve to have everything you ever desire. When you were born, I felt like my life was complete. I had someone to love and to care for. But things with mum made it difficult and I didn’t come back as often as I should. 

‘I know now that I should have come back. I should have been here to be a big sister to you. You deserve to have a big sister who will be here with you all of the time. But I can’t do that, Matilda. I have to be in London and only come back a couple of times. I’m going to work on coming back more often for you though. Even if it’s just for a day. I love you, Matilda Sage. And I am so sorry that I’m not the big sister I wanted to be for you.’ 

Liliana physically couldn’t stop the tears that fell down her face and pooled on the hoodie at her chest. Matilda breathed fast, trying to think of ways to calm Liliana down. When she couldn’t think of anything that might work, she climbed into her lap and hugged her tightly. Liliana’s arms wrapped around Matilda’s small waist and held her tightly against her. 

‘I love you,’ she said over and over again. ‘I am so sorry for leaving you and not seeing you much. I really do want that to change, even though things with mum are rough for me. I don’t know if you noticed but Christmas was particularly hard for me. Mum told me things that made me really sad and I had to go home and get away from her.’ 

Matilda held Liliana tighter, her own tears starting to fall down her cheeks. In Liliana’s arms, Matilda felt so grown up and it took everything in Liliana to not pack her a bag and take her back to London with her. She would have loved to take her sister away and be the grown up that she wished she had at that age. 

‘I want you to try and read this book, if you can. I know that you’re smart enough to understand things that are said in it. There’s just one thing I need you to know, about life in general.’ 

‘What’s that?’ Matilda asked as she wiped a tear from her cheek. 

‘You might hear grown ups telling you that you’re wise beyond your years, or that you’re an old soul. If they say that, I want you to tell me. Because I got told that a lot when I was your age and it’s taken a long time to realise that it’s not necessarily a good thing. And I don’t want you to end up like me.’ 

‘I want to be like you, though,’ Matilda said with a pout. ‘You’re strong, brave, caring, you love me, you have really fun clothes, you write books and get to travel the world. You’re awesome and I want to be like you when I grow up.’ 

Liliana took a deep breath and closed her eyes momentarily. ‘You are the best, Mats. You know that don’t you? You are so freaking amazing and I love you endlessly.’ 

‘My favourite colour is powder blue,’ Matilda continued after wiping the rest of her tears away, ‘but I tell everyone that it’s sage green because that’s your favourite colour and I want to be like you. You’re my big sister! You aren’t a bad person for not coming back much. It makes seeing you even more special. I love you.’ 

Liliana choked a sob. ‘I love you too, little girl. So much. I’m going to ask mum if you can come to London one weekend soon so you get to spend some time in the city and I get to see you. What do you say?’ 

Matilda nodded with the biggest smile on her face. She climbed off of Liliana’s lap and curled into her side instead, already thinking about the things she could do in a weekend when she was with her sister. 

‘Can I see Taron in the play?’ 

‘I’m not sure it’s quite age appropriate for you, Little Bug. But we could go and see him at the theatre before the show? I’m sure if you ask nicely he’d let you go backstage and see everything!’ 

‘That sounds good too. Maybe we could do something fun while I’m there?’ 

‘Like what?’ 

‘Madame Tussauds? Can Taron come with us if we go?’ 

‘That sounds fun! God, you really are going to like him more than you like me. I can feel it.’ 

‘I like him. I love you. There’s a difference, silly.’ 

***

‘I hate to pull a form of mum card on you right now,’ Tina said as she handed another glass of wine to Liliana, ‘but how come you never told anybody how you were doing before? Before you went to Edinburgh, I mean.’ 

Liliana swirled the wine softly, watching the line of alcohol that clung to the sides of the glass slowly make their way back down. She knew that Tina had read the book. It had been on the table next to the sofa when she saw her at Christmas. 

She also knew that Tina wanted to pry just as little as Taron had, but she also wanted to know more about Liliana and to make sure that she was okay after everything that happened. 

Liliana took a deep breath after taking a small sip of wine, and looked to the floor for a second to try and gain her composure for what felt like the millionth time that day. 

‘It might sound daft but I don’t think I’d realised just how bad things had gotten. I think because I’d been living with it for almost eight years at that point, and it got worse little by little rather than all at once, it just felt like normal life. I wasn’t trying to keep anything from anybody on purpose. 

‘It wasn’t until I was out of the situation that I realised how much it had affected me and my teenage years. It took a lot of therapy time to come to terms with it all and start to heal. By the time I realised just how bad it was, and how much I’d kept to myself, it was too late. Everything had happened already and I’d left. It felt like I couldn’t come back by that point.’ 

Tina smiled sadly at Liliana as she grabbed a blanket from the floor where the girls had left them after their movie night and wrapped it around her legs to get even cosier. 

After she’d told Matilda about the book earlier that morning, Taron had texted to tell her that his mum and sisters really wanted to meet Matilda and get to know her. So after the house was tidy and they were ready, they headed to Tina’s house for the afternoon. 

An afternoon where the three younger girls huddled on the living room floor playing on Liliana’s iPad, and Tina and Liliana caught up after not seeing one another since Christmas, Rosie had begged for Matilda and Liliana to spend the night. 

Eliza had allowed Matilda to stay out for the night, and Liliana couldn’t contain her excitement. The house had started to feel cramped over the last day or two and she knew that a comment would be made if she went back that evening, and Tina was more than happy to host. 

They made their own pizzas for dinner and watched films in the living room. Rosie, Marie and Matilda had trudged so many blankets and pillows down the stairs to throw on the floor and make a comfy bed to lay on; Tina got herself comfortable on the sofa with a glass of wine; and Liliana sat on the chair with a blanket and a glass of wine. 

They’d stayed there until the moon was high and the stars glittered in the night’s sky. When it was time for the younger girls to go to bed, they all crammed onto Rosie’s bed because nobody wanted to sleep on their own, and Tina and Liliana said goodnight before they headed back to the living room for more wine and to watch more films before they went to bed. 

‘I understand. And I appreciate you being honest and open with me. I always worried about you. I always used to tell Taron to make sure that you were alright because there were days when your sparkle wasn’t there. 

‘It broke him when you went to uni, you know.’ Liliana nodded softly and sniffled back tears. She could feel the lump forming in her throat but she didn’t want to cry any more that day. ‘He came home from the station, sat in that chair and just cried because he didn’t want you to leave. Don’t tell him I told you that though. I swore I’d not tell you so he would kill me.’ 

Liliana smiled. ‘Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. Please also know that all of the times you invited me over for dinner when I was a kid didn’t go unnoticed. Thank you for always welcoming me into your home and making me feel included. It meant, and still means, the world to me. Taron is so lucky to have a mum like you.’ 

‘He sure is,’ Tina winked. ‘He’s also lucky that he’s got you in his life again. I’ve never seen him as happy as I have these past few months. You really bring out the best in one another. And you’ve got that sparkle back that I missed so much.’ 

Liliana could feel her cheeks reddening at the comment, and she smiled happily. What Tina described as her sparkle was really Liliana’s inability to hide her happiness. So when she wasn’t visibly happy, the chances were that something was on her mind. 

It was no secret that she couldn’t stop smiling when she was around Taron, or merely thinking about him, but knowing that it was showing made Liliana’s insides turn to mush. She was absolutely besotted with the man and she decided that she never wanted to feel anything different. 

The parts of her that were once dark and hidden from the light were filled, and lit, by Taron. He knew how to love her in a way that she’d always needed. A way she’d always craved.

He texted to check in when they weren’t together. He made sure that she always had food that she liked at his flat so that she could eat when she was hungry. He learnt how to make her favourite dish for the nights when it was all she could think about eating. 

He learnt that when she went quiet, her mind was racing with negative thoughts and she needed distracting. He learnt when she was seemingly too energetic, she needed somebody to hold her and remind her that it was okay to relax and take time to herself. 

On days when she’d been exasperated with work and she had texted him to tell him that she’d had a rubbish day, she’d turn up at his flat to him running her a hot bubble bath, with a glass of wine and a box of chocolate waiting for her to enjoy and relax. 

He had, on multiple occasions, bought a book that he’d heard her talking about so that he could read it and talk to her about it. He’d driven almost forty minutes to her flat just to pick her up to take her out to meet friends in the city centre, and then he’d picked her up in the middle of the night to take her back to his flat so she didn’t have to get the Tube for work when she woke. 

Taron made her whole. 

‘I think I might call it a night,’ Tina yawned when their film finished. ‘Taron’s room is made up for you already. If you want to stay down here you’re more than welcome to. All I ask is that you switch the tv off at the wall for me. Otherwise it has a mind of its own and turns itself on in the middle of the night.’ 

‘I think I’m going to head up now,’ Liliana smiled. ‘I’m getting tired myself.’ 

Tina nodded and walked to turn the tv off properly. ‘That’s fine. What does Matilda like for breakfast? It’s something I forgot to ask her before I went to the shop earlier.’ 

‘She tends to have toast or cereal, but she isn’t fussy so honestly anything you offer her, she will eat.’ 

‘Is she not fussy or is she like you? You always used to accept things even if you weren’t too keen. Because you were too polite, and didn’t want anybody to feel as though you were putting them out.’ 

Liliana stuffed her tongue into her cheek as she tried to think of something to say back to Tina to defend herself. But there was no point, because Tina was right. Liliana had spent so much of her life not wanting to put people out that she would accept things less than what she deserved. 

‘I always knew,’ Tina continued with a smile. ‘I bought waffles, croissants and pain au chocolats from the shop. And I’ve got Nutella and Biscoff spread in the cupboard still. Or there’s toast.’ 

‘You just said all of Matilda’s favourite things,’ Liliana chuckled. ‘Croissants are her ultimate favourite, but waffles with spread is her big treat when I’m here.’ 

‘Obviously, because they’re your favourite breakfast foods. Why do you think I bought them? Matilda is so much like you it’s crazy, so I assumed that you’d shown her the best foods to eat for breakfast.’ 

Liliana stepped closer to Tina and wrapped her arms around her. No words would ever be able to thank her thoroughly. ‘Thank you.’ 

‘You’re welcome, honey. Let’s get to bed. I can guarantee the girls will be up early.’ 

***

Liliana had been in Taron’s bedroom tonnes as a kid, and walking in that night felt no different to when she was but a young girl. His old posters were, miraculously, still clinging to the walls with Bluetac older than Matilda. The walls were still a deep, midnight blue, and his carpet was still grey and soft. 

The only differences in the room, and the only things that kept her from feeling as though she’d walked into the past, was the double bed that sat where his old single used to be, and the larger tv that was on the wall.

She could remember the first day he got a tv. It was a chunky, silver one with a built-in video player and so much static on the screen that her hair would stand on end every time she walked near it. 

Taron had begged her to come over for dinner that night so that they could watch his new Spider-Man video while they did their homework. They spent the evening sitting sideways on his bed with a blanket over their knees as they watched the film, their homework untouched on his desk. 

Liliana opened his drawer and found a t-shirt of his to wear instead of the pyjama top she had packed. It smelled like him, and she realised just how much she missed him. As she sank into Taron’s bed, she pulled the covers up to her face and inhaled the scent of Taron before she grabbed her phone from the bedside table. 

Your bedroom looks the exact same as it used to. It’s like walking into 2003 xx 

My bedroom? Xx

I’m staying with your mum tonight xx

Two seconds later, her phone screen lit up with Taron’s face and she smiled before she answered the phone. She pressed it to her ear and closed her eyes as Taron started talking instantly. 

‘Is everything okay? How come you’re with my mum? Did something happen?’ His voice was laced with worry and she smiled at how sweet he was for worrying about her. 

‘No, nothing happened,’ she replied quickly to ease his worries. ‘Yet, anyway. It felt really stuffy there and she came home yesterday in a mood and made comments about how much more food she was buying, despite me buying a lot of my own food while I’ve been here. 

‘I knew it was going to start an argument so I was going to stay here anyway. Your mum and I watched a few films with some wine and had a little catch up.’

‘I’m glad that you’re alright, darling. How’s Matilda?’ Liliana could hear Taron shifting in bed as he talked to her.  Did everything go okay with that this morning?’

‘She’s amazing,’ Liliana said with a huge grin. ‘She’s actually currently sleeping in Rosie’s bedroom with both of your sisters. They all love one another and didn’t want to say goodbye tonight.’ 

Taron breathed a laugh through the phone. ‘That sounds like the girls. So everything was okay this morning?’ 

‘Yeah. We both cried but I knew that would happen.’ 

‘Love bug…’ 

‘It’s okay, Taron, promise. We sat on the sofa for a while and I held her. Or she held me. I can’t remember fully. I’ve planned with Eliza for her to come to London for the weekend sometime soon. Matilda requested that we come and see you at the theatre before the show and that the three of us go to Madame Tussauds, if you’re up for it?’ 

‘That sounds amazing!’ Taron exclaimed, and Liliana couldn’t contain the pure, unbridled joy that bubbled within her knowing that Taron was just as excited to see Matilda as Matilda was to see him. ‘I told you that everything would be okay.’ 

‘I know you did.’ Liliana smiled to herself as she fidgeted to find a more comfortable position. ‘I miss you.’ 

‘I miss you too, Lil. So much. But we get to see one another tomorrow night which will be good. What are your plans for tomorrow?’ 

‘Well your mum bought waffles, croissants and pain au chocolat from the shop earlier so it sounds like it’s going to be a feast of a breakfast and then I was planning to take Matilda to the arcade for a while before your mum takes me to the train station, but I might see if Rosie and Marie can, and want to, come too.

‘I can’t see your mum minding. She can always come down for an hour too if she wants to. It just depends how she’s feeling tomorrow. I’ll be back in London just after seven. There’s a semi-long wait at Birmingham so I’ll get some dinner from a shop in the station or something and then I’ll probably just read.’ 

‘That sounds like a good plan. I can’t wait to see you.’ 

‘Me too.’ 

‘So, my bedroom?’ 

‘Your bedroom,’ Liliana chuckled. ‘I can’t believe you still have your The Strokes poster. How is it still hanging on with that Bluetac?’ 

Taron laughed a solid laugh and sniffed. ‘I honestly have no idea. I wasn’t cool enough to frame all of my posters like you though. And I want to see how long it’ll stay there for. Might make it into the Guiness book of records.’ 

‘It probably will. This bed is comfy.’ 

‘How can I tell from here that you’re in one of my t-shirts? And knowing you, it’s the black one with the white checkerboard front.’ 

‘Hey! It’s comfortable. I miss you, and I want to hug you but you’re in London and I’m here, so this is the best I’ve got right now.’ 

She took a deep breath and watched the curtains blowing in the breeze that came in through the open window. There was something about Taron’s voice, soft and gentle, through the phone that made her insides dance achingly. 

‘I miss you.’ 

‘I miss you too, Lil.’ 

Liliana snuggled further into the duvet and danced soft circles into the inside of her thigh with the hand not holding her phone to her ear. ‘No, Taron. I miss you.’ 

She could hear the hitch in Taron’s breath at her words. Liliana closed her eyes, thinking that she’d started something that Taron wouldn’t be interested in. But then he started to talk and Liliana smirked to herself. 

‘Do you now, pretty lady? Tell me just how much you miss me.’ Taron’s voice dropped to a rough gravel that still, somehow, held a softness. It was the voice solely reserved for the bedroom. 

He felt his body respond to the thought of Liliana in his bed, wearing his t-shirt and nothing else, touching herself to the thought of him. The response was immediate. 

‘Taron, I miss you so much that I am soaking wet and I haven’t even touched myself yet. You’ve got me all hot and bothered just at the thought of you.’ 

Liliana’s heart rate accelerated and her breath caught in her throat. Even though it felt strange to have this conversation in Taron’s childhood bedroom, it turned her on just as much. Her hand moved from her thigh to the place where she needed it most, her moans rushing through the phone and into Taron’s ear. 

Taron sat up in bed at her moans, and he could feel just how hard he was at the mere sound. He slipped his boxers off and took a firm hold of himself. 

‘Lil, I’m going to need you to tell me everything that you’re doing. Tell me how you’re touching yourself.’ 

Liliana gasped at his demand. Taron had always been so soft and tender towards her that it surprised her that he was taking control. She loved it though. Normally dirty talk of any kind turned her cheeks a shade of red ten times darker than normal. But with Taron she didn’t feel embarrassed or shit, she felt sexy and desirable which made a nice change. 

Her fingers moved away from her centre to slip to her collarbone and her eyes fluttered closed at the feel. If she thought hard enough, she could just about imagine that it was Taron’s fingers touching her, his breath on her neck as he kissed her deep. She could feel the vibrations of his moans against her skin, and goosebumps covered her skin. 

‘Tell me, Lil. Tell me what you’re doing.’ 

‘I’m touching my boobs,’ she whispered, worried that Tina wasn’t asleep yet and could hear what she was doing. The enormity of the situation hit her like a tonne of bricks and she paused her movements for a second to try and calm herself.

‘Everything okay, Love Bug?’ Taron asked when Liliana hadn’t spoken for a few seconds. 

‘Yeah. Sorry, just worried that someone will hear.’ 

‘They won’t. Are your nipples hard?’ Liliana hummed her response, and she heard Taron groan at the feel of his hand wrapped around himself. ‘I love your boobs. Fit so perfect in my hands. Reach down lower, baby. Just like you’re aching to. Talk me through it.’ 

Liliana let out a shuddery breath before allowing her fingers to dance down her body, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. Her legs fell open under the covers as she reached her most sensitive spot over the top of her underwear. 

‘I’ve soaked my underwear through.’ Taron groaned loudly on the other side of the phone, having the luxury to not have to be quiet in fear of waking anybody up. Liliana braced herself as she made a statement that could potentially turn Taron feral. ‘It’s all for you.’ 

‘Jesus, fuck, Lil,’ he breathed out. She smiled to herself as she pushed her underwear to the side and let her finger caress her entrance. 

Her eyes rolled into the back of her head at the sensation. ‘I’m so wet. Could just slip a finger in.’ 

‘Do it,’ Taron commanded. Liliana did as she was told, pressing her finger into herself. ‘I want you to picture me there. I want you to lift your wetness to your clit.’ 

Taron’s hand had picked up pace and his breathing was speeding up and clunky. His eyes closed as he pictured Liliana laid bare before him. He could picture her looking at him as she touched herself, allowing herself to be pleasured at the thought of him, and because of him. 

‘I’m pulling my middle finger up to my clit,’ she told him as she did it. Her movements were teasingly slow, wanting to drag out the pleasure for as long as possible. ‘I’m starting with those lazy circles you like to tease me with. My finger is slipping around so easily and I can feel the pressure building already.’ 

‘Yes, Lil, keep going. Please.’ 

Liliana could hear the movement of Taron’s hand, and his breathy panting. It turned her on even more, if that was even possible, and spurred her to continue. She began to quicken her movements and she squirmed on the bed. The longer she went, the more difficult it was to keep quiet and not wake up the rest of the house. 

‘Now,’ Liliana said as she shifted to sit up a little bit, ‘I’m pressing my finger into myself again. And a second one too, just to add to the pleasure. Now I’m bringing them back to my clit and I’m rubbing myself again.’ 

‘God, I love the thought of watching you touch yourself,’ Taron said through shaken breathing. ‘Especially while you’re thinking about me touching you. I wish you were here to feel how achingly hard I am right now. Just wanna be in you.’ 

Taron’s strokes had reached a frantic pace and he knew that he was close, but he needed Liliana to reach her limit first so he forced himself to take a deep breath and slow down. Since their first night together, he’d vowed that Liliana would reach her climax before he allowed himself to reach his, no matter how long it took. 

On the other end of the phone, Taron could hear Liliana’s moans and the soft sounds of her arousal as she touched herself, and he knew that she was close too. He could picture her, eyes screwed shut and hips raised from the bed a little as she brought herself to the edge. 

‘Oh, that feels so good,’ she moaned. ‘I wish I could feel you right now too. I wish you were here to show me how much you love me. I’m so close, Taron.’ 

A tear fell from Liliana’s eye as she strained to calm herself down enough to fall over the edge. ‘I’m so close.’ 

‘That’s my good girl, cum for me.’ 

Liliana let out a louder moan at his last words and they were just enough for her to push herself over the tantalising edge. Her orgasm washed over her in waves and her legs shook softly against the mattress as she let out a muffled moan and garbled versions of Taron’s name into the pillow to stop herself from screaming in pleasure. Taron had left her unable to form words. 

‘That’s it, Lil. That’s my good girl. God I’m gonna cum!’ Taron was less concerned with being quiet, so he shouted her name into the phone as he gave himself the final few strokes it took to reach his own climax. 

They both lay breathless on their own beds for a minute, coming down from their highs. Liliana was the first to make a sound when she breathed a chuckle into the quiet, sticky bedroom. She was shocked at herself for how comfortable she felt with everything that had just happened. It was a testament to how safe and loved she felt with Taron. 

When she had regained her breath enough to move, she picked the phone up that she’d dropped next to her ear during her orgasm. ‘Taron, that was…seriously hot.’ 

‘You’re telling me,’ Taron chuckled. She could hear the smirk in his voice, and his breathing which was slowly getting back to normal. His voice had lost the gravel and was back to being his usual light, soft voice. 

‘I mean it,’ Liliana continued. ‘I’ve never really been comfortable with any sort of sexting or phone sex before. It’s always been something I felt like I had to do to keep someone happy. But with you? You made me feel so sexy and desirable and that’s all I’ve ever wanted. I love you so much.’ 

Liliana sniffled softly as she pressed the phone to her ear tighter and breathed in the scent of Taron from the pillow. 

‘Lil, it makes me so happy that I make you feel that way. It’s a goal of mine to make you feel that way, because you deserve to feel as sexy and desirable as I find you. You’re the sexiest woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. The literal pleasure. And I love you too. So fucking much, baby.’ 

Liliana begrudgingly sat herself up and pushed the covers away from her so that she could use the bathroom before she went to sleep. She heard Taron shift in the bed and she knew that he was off to find something dry to sleep in. The thought alone had her legs rubbing together to find some friction. 

‘I can’t wait to have you home and in my bed tomorrow so we can pick this back up again,’ Taron said softly. Liliana hummed at him and he laughed through the phone. ‘I’m not even with you and you’re fucked out. Go get some sleep, Love Bug. Good night, I love you.’ 

‘Night my sexy teddy bear.’ Taron guffawed through the phone and Liliana smiled to herself before she yawned. ‘I think I ought to get some sleep once I’ve used the toilet. I love you too. See you tomorrow.’ 

‘See you tomorrow.’ 

Within minutes Liliana was back in bed and tucked under Taron’s covers. She kicked a leg over one side of the covers so that only half of her body was covered before she drifted off into a peaceful, and satisfied, sleep. 

April 15th, 2022

Liliana spotted Taron’s car the second she stepped out of the train station, and any lingering anxiety from her trip vanished in an instant. After towing with her luggage for the entire journey back, and through a forty minute delay in Birmingham which left her in a busy Starbucks with a coffee and her book, it was nice to be able to pass it to Taron who had jumped out of the car to help her. 

As he put it in the boot of the car for her, Liliana climbed into the front seat of the car and took a deep breath. Taron’s car smelled like his cologne and the scent enveloped her. She relaxed into the seat and only turned her head to Taron’s side of the car when he opened the door and climbed in. 

‘You’re home,’ he smiled at her. 

Liliana smiled back at him and her entire body heated up as she realised that she was the happiest she’d ever been when she got home from Aberystwyth. She’d always get back to London and feel better, but she never got back to London excited. She was home. Not just in London where she happened to live, but with Taron. 

Her eyes filled with tears as she looked at him and took a shaky breath. He looked at her curiously until she said the two words he hadn’t realised he needed to hear. 

‘I’m home.’ 

Leaning over the centre console of the car, he held her face and pulled her lips to his. They both sighed into it and Liliana wrapped her arms awkwardly around Taron’s shoulders. 

Taron let his tongue glide over Liliana’s lips and just as she was about to grant him access, the car behind them beeped their horn and they jumped apart with a laugh. Liliana watched Taron as he turned the engine on and pulled out of the parking spot, his hand reaching over to hold onto Liliana’s thigh. 

The ride back to Taron’s flat was short, but Liliana talked his ear off about Matilda when he asked about her, and he loved watching her talk so freely and so happily. She’d told him that it was one of the first times she’d seen her for so long without an argument with Eliza, and he was happy that she’d gotten that time but devastated that it had taken so long. 

‘You should have seen the girls this morning,’ she said happily as they got closer to his flat. ‘I took them all to the arcade because your mum had a bit of a headache so she stayed home. But they were little rockets! They won at most of the games, and all used their ticket winnings to buy sweets because there weren’t many prizes for kids their age. 

‘There’s so much more in there now! It’s changed so much since I was last there. There’s a Crossy Bird game in there now which was fun, and I was so bad at it. But,’ she continued with a devious smile, ‘I got so many more 2ps than them all. They were all shocked at how many I got.’ 

‘You were always good at them,’ Taron replied happily as he pulled into the underground car park. ‘I’m glad you had a good time though. It sounds like you needed it.’ 

‘I think I did. It was nice to just be there and not feel like I was in the way or burdening anybody. Your mum and I had a conversation last night about before I left, and it felt nice to be able to, I guess get closure with it? I don’t know if that makes any sense. But it felt like there was always something left unsaid. Now she knows why I did what I did and I got to thank her for everything she did for me as a kid.’ 

Taron turned to her briefly before he parked the car and squeezed her thigh softly. ‘She told me. She said that she’s grateful that you’re back in her life because she missed you. She also said that you’re a bad influence and made her drink a bottle of wine to herself?’ 

Liliana’s jaw dropped. ‘Absolutely not! She was the one with the bottle in front of her and she kept filling my glass up whenever it was halfway empty! She’s the bad influence.’ 

They both laughed before Taron stopped the car and they both climbed out. Before Taron got her luggage, he pulled Liliana into his body and held her tightly for a short minute. Liliana fell into him and held him tightly around the waist. 

‘A week is far too long to go without seeing you,’ she mumbled into his chest. ‘A day is far too long.’ 

‘I agree. Come on, let’s get upstairs.’

***

Taron’s living room was filled with all of her favourite people. Liliana looked around the room in awe. Her eyes welled up at the sight of everyone there and Taron pulled her into his side lovingly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head as she wrapped her arms around his middle. 

Evelyn and Jacob sat on the long sofa with proud smiles on their faces. Evelyn scrunched her nose at Liliana, a big tell that she’d been keeping it a secret. If anybody was unable to keep a secret, it was Evelyn, and Liliana was impressed that she hadn’t let on about anything, even when they Facetimed that afternoon while Liliana was on the train. 

Jonathan, who had become a good friend of Liliana’s through the times she went to the theatre, stood with his arms in the air and a smile that mirrored Jacob’s on his face. He winked at Liliana as her eyes passed him and she gave him a teary smile in return. 

When she saw Tina, Rosie and Marie in the corner, Liliana couldn’t believe her eyes. It had only been a few hours before that she had said goodbye to them. It had been a teary farewell, with promises to see one another soon. Liliana hadn’t realised just how soon Tina meant. 

It wasn’t until Liliana looked around Rosie and Marie that she saw the one person who had her choking out a sob. Matilda stepped out from behind Taron’s sisters with tears in her eyes and a smile on her face. 

Liliana burst into tears and held Taron tightly as the room erupted in a chorus of ‘aww’s. Taron kissed her softly before nudging her towards Matilda, who had made her way to them.

Liliana engulfed her sister in a hug and held on tightly as everyone watched happily. Matilda squeezed Liliana just as tightly and giggled when her feet lifted from the ground and she was spun around in circles. 

‘Mum’s ‘headache’,’ Taron whispered in her ear quietly, ‘was because she was talking to Eliza for me. I wanted Matilda to be here and I knew it would be better coming from my mum who could talk to her. So she told a little fib and said she had a headache. Once she dropped you off at the train station, she picked Matilda’s bag up for her and they set off to come here.’ 

‘I love you,’ Liliana whispered back, kissing his lips gingerly before she set Matilda down on the floor. ‘How long do you get to stay for?’ 

Matilda shrugged her shoulders. All she’d been told was that she was going to London to surprise Liliana. Both girls looked at Taron who couldn’t contain his excitement. 

‘We’re taking you home on Wednesday.’ Liliana looked at Taron with furrowed brows. ‘Mum and the girls are going home on Sunday evening. Matilda is staying here until Wednesday. Then we’re taking her home and staying at mum’s for the night before we come home on Thursday. I want you to spend as much time with her as you can.

‘I’ve spoken to the team at the theatre and they know that I won’t be there for two nights because I’ll be with my family. Everything is sorted. All you have to worry about is spending time with her.’ 

Liliana couldn’t believe the thought and effort that Taron had put into the party for her, and knowing that she got to spend even longer with Matilda made her hug her little sister to her chest once more. 

‘We’re going to have so much fun, Little Bug.’ 

***

The party got into full swing pretty quickly once Jonathan handed Liliana a large glass of something alcoholic. It tasted like tequila mixed with something not so nice, but she tilted her head back and threw it down her throat anyway. Jonathan cheered as Liliana shook her head dramatically once she’d swallowed the concoction he’d passed to her. 

It burned her throat and left her breath fiery. But as the burn settled and she got to taste the sweetness that had cut through the tequila, her eyes lit up and she wiggled her eyebrows at Jonathan. 

‘Another Bailey coming up! I’ll keep them coming.’ 

‘You named the drink after yourself?’ Taron asked while shaking his head in disbelief. ‘Really?’ 

‘It’s my special cocktail so why shouldn’t I name it after myself? Say it, you’re dying to know what’s in it.’ Taron nodded a little, even though he wasn’t fully sure that he did want to know. ‘It’s tequila, coconut liqueur, pineapple juice and a hint of lime. You should have one.’ 

Liliana smiled up at Taron and licked her lips, still able to taste the drink on them. She leaned up just enough to kiss Taron on the cheek and he wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her upright. 

‘We’ll take two,’ he said through a grin. 

Jonathan sauntered off to the kitchen just as Let’s Get It On started playing through the speakers in the living room. The one single glass of alcohol Liliana had already started to work its magic and her confidence began to grow. 

When Jonathan passed her another drink, she took a small sip and her eyes rolled into the back of her head. It tasted so much better the second time around. 

Taron leaned against the wall watching everyone dance and have a good time, and Liliana joined him, letting her hand glide over his stomach. He watched her with bated breath. Her hand reached lower and he had to react quickly to move it back to a safe spot. 

‘Babe, not in front of my mum and our baby sisters. Or your friends. Later, I promise.’ 

‘But it’s been over a week since I last got to touch you,’ she pouted. Her eyes blinked up at him and he tried his best to hold back the endeared smile that was fighting its way to his mouth. ‘I’ve missed you.’ 

‘You’re just going to have to be patient, Love Bug.’ 

She sighed in exasperation but turned quickly when Evelyn passed her another drink over her shoulder and dragged her to the middle of the room that had been dubbed the dance floor so that they could dance to Watermelon Sugar as it began to play. 

***

The evening continued with everybody drinking, dancing and laughing as they got to know one another. Evelyn and Jacob fell in love with Matilda, Rosie and Marie, and the five of them created their own little group. They danced more than anybody else, and not a single one of them went a second without laughing. 

When it got late and the three youngest girls grew tired and were unable to keep their eyes open for very long, Tina took them into the bedroom so that they could go to bed. 

Taron, Jacob and Jonathan decided that the best way to continue the party was to serenade everyone with their own rendition of Dancing Queen. They all stood around the one singular microphone Taron had for the karaoke machine, their heads knocking together multiple times. 

Being Taron, he declared that he must be Colin Firth’s character because, as he put it, ‘he’s my film dad so it’s only right’. They sang the song together, complete with disco moves and random hip thrusts that had everyone rolling around laughing. 

Nobody was able to rip the microphone out of Taron’s hands from that point on. He sang his go to karaoke song Faith, and Jacob insisted that he also sing one of Elton’s songs. Taron grabbed Jacob and forced him to sing Don’t Go Breaking My Heart with him. 

The room erupted in cheers at the end of the song. Tina rolled her eyes at Taron, but adored how happy he was with Taron. Neither of them had outright told her that they were together, but she’d known since Liliana was in Wales. She just wanted them to be able to tell her when they felt ready. 

After Taron’s last karaoke song, Tina excused herself to check on the girls, but she wanted to leave everyone to party without feeling like a parent was watching them. 

Liliana finally managed to grab the microphone from Taron and she stood on the coffee table with it. Everyone cheered as she began to sing Toni Basil’s Hey Mickey, except she changed the lyrics to Hey Taron. 

Everyone danced around her, enjoying how carefree and happy she was. She whipped her hair back and forth, and leaned forward whenever Taron was near to sing directly to him. The alcohol she had consumed had lowered all of her inhibitions and she was beyond grateful that she was able to relax and let her hair down. 

As the song came to a finish, Taron stood at the front of the coffee table and Liliana fell into his arms with a dramatic sigh. Everyone clapped for her as Jonathan and Jacob grabbed the mic from her to sing something else. 

***

The party went on until the early hours of the morning. Evelyn had tried to get Liliana to go to a club for the rest of the night but she turned her down politely. Jonathan agreed to go out with her though she wasn’t too disappointed that Liliana was staying home. 

After saying their goodbyes to the trio, Liliana and Taron stood in the living room surveying the mess they would have to clean up. Liliana groaned at the sight of plastic cups dotted around the room, and decorations out of place. 

‘Leave it until tomorrow, Lil,’ Taron said quietly. He wasn’t fussed with the mess and knew that it would clean up easily the following day. ‘Dance with me instead.’ 

He grabbed Liliana’s hand and pulled her into him right as he pressed play on Unchained Melody. The song played through the living room speakers that had been used all night. He started to sway them side to side and Liliana melted into his embrace. 

She let her head rest against his shoulder and her eyes fell closed as Taron guided her in a dance. For the first time in a long time, Liliana felt so light and happy that she never wanted to leave that moment. If she could live in a moment forever, it would be that moment. 

Liliana raised her head just enough to look into Taron’s eyes, her chin resting on his chest as she peered up at him through her eyelashes. Taron was already looking down at her and she fought the blush that was trying to reach her cheeks. 

‘I don’t think I’ve said it enough, but thank you so much for tonight, T. I don’t think I knew how much I needed something like this, surrounded by all of my favourite people. And the fact that you went above and beyond to get Matilda here is just…well I don’t think I will ever be able to thank you enough for that.’ 

‘You don’t have to thank me, Love Bug.’ Taron beamed down at her before leaning to press a chaste peck to her lips. ‘I’d do anything for you. I always want you to remember that you have a family right here that will always show you love. You don’t ever have to be sorry for growing up and leaving, you know. I’m just glad we found our way back to one another.’ 

Liliana teared up thinking about the family that she’d created. It didn’t matter that Matilda was the only family who cared about her, because she had Matilda, and she had a bunch of other people who loved her like they were her family. She had found a family. 

‘You are hands down the sweetest man in the world,’ she whispered up at him before gulping down a lump in her throat. ‘And I am by far the luckiest woman to get to call you mine.’ 

As the song had reached its crescendo and the Righteous Brothers crooned, ‘My darlin, I’ve hungered, hungered for your touch’, Liliana let her hands wander down Taron’s chest and towards the waistband of his jeans. 

Ever since their phone call the night before, something had awakened in Liliana. She still felt desirable and she wanted nothing more than for Taron to fulfil the promise he made before he went to sleep. 

The confidence that tequila gave her through the evening continued as she started to unbutton his jeans in the living room. The song hadn’t ended completely but Liliana leaned up and whispered in Taron’s ear, her breath sending goosebumps down his entire body, and a jolt of electric to his dick. 

‘I need you inside me, right now.’

Taron didn’t have time to respond before Liliana grabbed his hand and pulled him through to his bedroom. He just about managed to turn the light off on their way out of the door. 

He was, if he were to be completely honest, in disbelief at Liliana’s sudden intensity. Not that he didn’t love it, because he absolutely did. But usually, Liliana let him initiate sex and she was never confident enough to be in control. It was as though something was holding her back. A worry that she would make a fool of herself or go too far and do something that put Taron off. 

But he’d hoped that she would come out of her shell a bit more. Apparently all it took was phone sex and tequila. He could feel himself growing hard at the thought of her wanting him just as badly as he wanted her. 

As soon as they reached the bedroom and the door was shut behind them, Liliana pushed herself up against Taron against the wall and kissed him deeply. She poured every ounce of pent up emotion, and need for him, into it. Her hands grabbed anywhere she could get purchase; around his neck, in his hair, down his chest, and around his arms. 

They were both completely out of breath when they pulled away from the kiss, and Liliana looked at Taron innocently for a fraction of a second before her eyes grew dark and her lips attached to his neck. 

‘Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?’ Taron moaned quietly as Liliana ran the tip of her tongue over his skin up to his ear. 

She still tried to touch everywhere she could reach, and she continued to pepper kisses all over him while also attempting to remove both of their clothes at the same time. However, she only succeeded in removing her jeans and socks. Taron could tell that she was beginning to get frustrated so he slid his hands up the length of her torso underneath her t-shirt to remove it for her. 

After throwing it on the floor, he grabbed the back of his own t-shirt and pulled it away from his body, leaving his abdomen free to Liliana’s grabby hands. She held him close and kissed down his neck and towards his chest. His head fell back against the door as he unbuckled his jeans and shimmied out of them quickly. 

Once they were only in their underwear, Taron nudged Liliana away from him so that he could kiss her lips again. His hands roamed her body until they got to her but, and he squeezed lightly making her gasp softly into his mouth. 

‘Taron, I need you.’ 

‘I know, baby, I know. I’m getting there.’ 

Liliana shook her head. ‘No, I need you now. It’s been a week and I can’t physically wait any longer. I don’t even think I will make it to the bed.’ 

‘Say no more, my love,’ Taron chuckled as he pushed Liliana’s underwear down her legs where she stepped out of them. 

He flipped them around so that Liliana was the one against the wall, and he smirked at her gasp. She licked her lips slowly and batted her eyelashes at him, hoping that he would become as feral for her then as he did the night before on the phone. It worked, and Taron shoved his underwear down his legs faster than he ever had before he grabbed one of her legs and lifted it to wrap around his waist. 

Taron leaned an arm against the wall by Liliana’s head and his head fell forward onto her shoulder when she reached between them and grabbed his length, lining it up with her entrance. He inhaled sharply when he felt how wet she was. He grabbed himself and looked down at Liliana whose chest was already heaving. 

‘Are you sure you’re okay with no condom, Lil? It would only take me two seconds to grab one from the drawer.’ 

Having him so close to where she needed him but not inside her sent Liliana out of her mind, and she held his chest firmly as she nodded her head. ‘Please, Taron, just fuck me already.’ 

Taron’s eyes widened at Liliana’s change of pace, but as always he was more than happy to give her what she wanted. He dragged his tip through her folds to slick himself up and he could feel just how ready she was. Lining himself up with her entrance once more, he leaned down to capture Liliana’s lips with his own. 

In one swift motion he was buried inside her. Liliana moaned into his mouth as Taron wasted no time in setting a quick, yet thorough, pace. He held onto her bum to help keep her upright when he felt her leg shaking. 

Liliana’s head rolled back into the wall and Taron peppered kisses down her neck and to her collarbone where he sucked a love mark, the only place she would allow. He wanted her to wake up the following morning and remember that night. He wanted her to be reminded of how much they wanted one another. 

‘Oh yeah. That feels so good Taron,’ Liliana moaned. She forgot that they weren’t alone in the flat and her voice wasn’t as quiet as it should have been, so Taron kissed her again to keep her quiet. 

His hips quickened their pace as he thrust into her, his free hand reaching down to rub circles on her clit at the same time. He could tell that she was close when her walls started to squeeze around him. It wasn’t a surprise. After a week apart and their mutual desperation for each other when she got home, it was inevitable that they wouldn’t last long, and Taron could feel himself getting close as well. 

‘Come on, Love Bug, cum all over my dick. Cum with me.’ 

Taron’s words were enough for Liliana to tumble over the edge into an orgasm that made her back arch away from the wall and squeeze her eyes shut in ecstasy as wave after wave of pleasure washed over her. Liliana’s orgasm triggered Taron’s own and with a few final thrusts, he filled her with his own cum. 

 When he was sure that Liliana had come down from her high, and that she would be able to stand on her own, Taron slipped out of her and slowly lowered the leg that had been wrapped around his waist. He leaned his body weight on the arm against the wall and used his free arm to cup Liliana’s chin to kiss her. 

As Liliana came back down to Earth and could breathe easy again, she noticed the feeling of Taron’s cum sliding down the inside of her thigh. Nothing had ever made her feel so wanton before. She was already throbbing to feel him again so she pushed her hands against Taron’s chest and started walking until the back of his knees hit the bed, all while kissing him. 

Liliana pushed him down onto the soft duvet and climbed over him until she straddled his waist. He could tell that she was ready to go again, and he smirked at her with a light shake of his head. He tried to flip them over but she shook her head. 

‘Nope, my turn.’ 

‘Fuck me, you are perfect,’ he whimpered against her lips. ‘What did I ever do to deserve someone as perfect as you?’ 

Liliana grinded her hips over his and his head fell back on his neck. Taron grabbed her hips and stopped her movements when he heard footsteps walking down the hallway outside of the bedroom. He knew that if anybody knocked on the door and walked in while they were like that, Liliana wouldn’t ever be able to handle the embarrassment, so he grabbed the blanket form near his pillows just in case he needed to cover them both quickly. 

Liliana mentally chastised herself for being so loud with other people in the flat, especially her little sister. Luckily whoever was awake walked further down the hall and into the bathroom. Taron held onto Liliana’s hips until they heard the toilet flush and whoever was in there go back to their own bedroom. 

After a few extra seconds of silence, Liliana giggled quietly at Taron. ‘That was a close call.’ 

‘You’re telling me,’ he laughed. ‘Now, where were we? Oh yeah, now I remember.’ 

Liliana smiled playfully before planting kisses to his neck and chest. As she kissed him, Taron’s hands roamed up her back and into her hair, tugging gently. She moaned softly at the feel and grinded down on him again. Liliana could feel Taron growing hard again and her own arousal hadn’t subsided so she raised herself on her knees enough to grab him and position him at her entrance again. 

She took her time as she lowered herself onto him. Inch by inch she could feel him stretching her, and she breathed slowly to stop herself from coming undone there and then. Taron let out the most indecent moan she had ever heard when he bottomed out and she couldn’t hold back a grin knowing that she was the one to make him sound like that. 

‘Jesus fuck, Lil, you feel so good.’ 

Liliana wrapped her arms around Taron’s shoulders to steady herself and regain some semblance of composure. She wanted it to last longer this time so that she could feel Taron fully. After leaning down for another quick kiss, Liliana slowly moved herself up Taron’s dick before lowering herself again. Her hair fell around her face and she threw it over her shoulder so that she would be able to lean down and kiss Taron. 

She fell into a good rhythm quickly and the more she went, the more comfortable she felt being the one in control. Her hands rested against Taron’s chest as she moved over him. When she sat back so that Taron could see where they met, Taron’s jaw dropped open and he let his hands slide up to cup her breasts. He pinched her nipples and her head fell back as a moan escaped her. 

‘This view alone would kill a mere mortal, and I am more than ready to die if this is the last thing I see,’ he groaned against her before licking her nipple into his mouth. Liliana squeezed his shoulders at the pleasure. 

‘It’s a good thing you are no mere mortal,’ she whimpered as he moved to her other nipple. 

She adjusted to the new angle and began to bounce up and down a little faster. Occasionally, she let her hands stray into her hair and tug the way that Taron did. Whenever she looked at him, his mouth was ajar and he looked at her as though she hung the moon. It was a bigger turn on than she thought it could be to see how pleased he looked to have her in control of their pleasure. 

He planted his hands firmly on her bum to hold her tight against him. Her head fell back and her hands ached to grab onto something to stop her from toppling over the edge too soon. 

‘You’ve got no idea how sexy you look right now,’ Taron commented as Liliana slowed her hips again. ‘You ought to be on top more often if this is the view I get because fuck you’re perfect.’ 

‘All I want is to see you come undone underneath me.’ 

Liliana shocked herself with the confession. She had never embraced sex like this before. Yes, it was pleasurable sometimes, but she had often seen it as more of a chore than an enjoyable activity. But with Taron, every time had been more pleasurable than the last and she wanted to have sex with him whenever she could. It had become something she craved rather than something she did for the sake of doing it. She never wanted sex with Taron to end. 

Overcome with intense emotion, Liliana kissed Taron and hoped that he could feel everything she felt. She wanted him, and only him, forever. He kissed her back with a ferocity that she hadn’t been expecting and started to lift his hips to meet her thrust for thrust. 

Liliana tried to sit back up but Taron pulled her back down to him. ‘Please don’t sit back up. I want to see you fall apart for me.’ 

They had fallen into the perfect rhythm and continued at that pace until they were both trembling and Liliana couldn’t hold on for much longer. Her walls clamped down around Taron’s length and her moans began to get louder so Taron kissed her to muffle the sound. 

‘I’m there,’ she mumbled into him. ‘I’m going to cum.’ 

‘Cum for me, Love Bug.’ 

Liliana stared straight into Taron’s fathomless green eyes as her second orgasm consumed her. Soft moans escaped her lips even with Taron’s kisses to try and swallow them. He came apart with her, spilling a second load inside her. When they were both sated, neither of them moved or broke eye contact. 

Neither of them had to say anything to know that they knew how the other felt. They loved one another and would always be there for each other, through all the ups and downs that life threw at them. 

When Liliana’s arms felt too tired to hold herself up anymore, she leaned down and laid her head on Taron’s shoulder, still refusing to break the intimate contact of where they connected. Taron’s arms wrapped around her waist and he ran his hand up and down her clammy back. 

‘Taron?’ Liliana asked. Taron hummed. ‘I don’t think I could be happier than I am in this moment with you. You’ve shown me what it means to be loved properly and I hope I show you the same. I know it can be hard to love me-’ 

‘Liliana, please don’t finish that sentence,’ Taron said softly. ‘Loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done. I don’t ever have to think about loving you, because it’s just something that I do. The things that you’ve been through are going to make you feel certain ways and you’re going to have bad days, but that doesn’t make it hard to love you. 

‘If anything, it makes me more determined to love you more on those days. Because you deserve to feel this happiness every day. And you do show me what it is to be loved. You love me more than anybody has before, and I’ll forever be grateful to you for that.’ 

Liliana finally moved herself to lay next to him. She knew that she should get up and use the bathroom, but she was so content that she didn’t want to burst the bubble they were currently in, despite the fact that she risked getting a UTI. Instead, she turned on her side to cuddle into Taron’s chest and he pulled her as close as he could and planted a kiss on top of her head before covering them both in the blanket. 

‘Night, Lil, I love you.’ 

March 20th, 2022

Liliana woke up to the smell of toast wafting from the kitchen, and as she peeled her eyes open in the bright space of Taron’s bedroom, she could just about make out his figure stepping through the door, a tray balanced in his hands and a smile plastered on his face. 

It wasn’t the first time she had woken up in his bed, but each time he walked into the room and saw her wrapped up in his sheets, he could barely contain the excitement bubbling in his belly. He knew that under the covers, she was still naked from the night before when they had made love over and over, only falling asleep when dawn had started to break. 

He himself had only pulled his boxers over his legs so that he could go make breakfast without anybody in the flats across the street seeing his naked form. Lazy Sunday mornings in bed were quickly becoming a ritual that Liliana treasured. 

Liliana reciprocated his smile, and slowly sat herself up in bed. A yawn escaped her but she only let one eye fall closed again. She wanted to watch Taron as he made his way to the bed and expertly pulled the legs of the tray down so that he could set it on the bed in front of her. 

The tray was full. Taron had stacked six slices of toast on one plate for them to share. There were two mugs of tea filled to the brim, a smaller one for Taron and a larger one for Liliana. Her eyes widened in excitement at the sight. 

On the smaller plates he’d put on the tray too was a pile of packets of butter, jam, nutella, honey and marmalade that Taron had taken from the last hotel he’d stayed at. He always insisted that he could need one at any given time, and they were helpful to have in the campervan. 

‘Easier than taking big packs with me every time I want to go somewhere,’ he’d insisted whenever anybody asked him why he had so many. 

‘This is a new tray,’ Liliana said as she ran her finger over the light wood finish. The old one had polystyrene balls at the base and wobbled everytime they moved an inch. The new one sat more sturdy and she didn’t have to hold onto it whenever she needed to shift herself to get comfortable. 

Taron nodded as he climbed back into the bed beside her. ‘I bought a new one to make it easier for things like this. That other one was bothering me. I couldn’t so much as turn to kiss you without food going everywhere.’ 

‘You bought a new tray just so you could have breakfast in bed?’ Liliana asked as she reached forward for her mug of tea. Since she’d started to stay the night at Taron’s a couple of weeks before, she’d gravitated to one mug in the cupboard, and he’d quickly donned it hers. 

‘No, I bought a new tray so that I could make you breakfast in bed whenever you stay here overnight,’ he corrected her with a smile. 

Liliana shuffled over so that she could rest her head in the crook of his armpit, and Taron leaned forward to kiss the top of her head. They fell into a short silence as Taron shifted the tray so that he could let it go and it wouldn’t topple over while pulling the duvet over his legs, covering his bed and the toast he’d made with tea. 

‘It’s not much today,’ Taron said apologetically as he plated three slices of toast for Liliana, offering her the butter, ‘I need to go food shopping. I’ve barely got time with being at the theatre as much as I am. And when I’m not at the theatre, I’m with you.’ 

‘I’m sorry,’ Liliana mumbled as she grabbed a couple of Nutella packets and the one random Biscoff packet he’d brought out. ‘I take up all of your free time.’ 

Taron dropped the slice of toast he was about to butter and twisted his body so he could cup Liliana’s cheeks in his hands. Her cheeks were warm against his hands, and her eyes fell closed for a millisecond. 

‘I want to spend every waking minute with you,’ he told her when her eyes fluttered open again. ‘I was in no way trying to insinuate that spending time with you means I don’t have time. That’s not at all what I meant. If I could be with you every hour of every day, both awake and asleep, I would. I hate that being at the theatre pulls me away from you.’ 

Liliana shook her head at him. ‘No, I’m so proud of you and everything that you’re putting into this show. How about this? You make me a list of things you need from the shop and I’ll get them when I’ve finished my work for today. I can drop them off, put them away and then head back to mine.’ 

‘You won’t be here tonight?’ Taron asked. His eyes dropped and his shoulder slumped, and Liliana used her thumb to unfurrow his brows. 

‘I didn’t want to assume that you wanted me here again.’ 

‘I always want you here.’ 

His voice was steady and Liliana knew that he was being sincere. She’d loved spending time in Taron’s flat and having more space to move around. Though she didn’t want to be a burden by overstaying her welcome. Not that Taron ever thought she was. He meant it when he told her that he wanted to spend every second with her. 

‘I also only have one pair of clean underwear left so I need to go back and get some washing done.’ 

‘You don’t need underwear when you’re with me,’ Taron teased, nuzzling his nose against Liliana’s. ‘Now I’ve seen you naked, I would much rather you be naked around me all the time. I’ll return the favour, obviously. Who needs clothes?’ 

A blush rose to Liliana’s cheeks. The night before, Taron had taken his time undressing her, and loved on every part of her body. He’d kissed from her lips all the way down to her legs where he situated himself between them and kissed her in the place she felt it the most. Liliana had come undone with her hands tangled in his hair and her legs tightening around his head. 

The thought alone was enough for her to shift to try and get some friction. Taron noticed and chuckled to himself, running his hand up her arm before going back to his toast. 

‘As much as you would love that, I’m sure everyone at work would prefer it if I didn’t turn up tomorrow in three day old sweats and a t-shirt that I spilled curry on the other day.’ 

‘Everyone at work loves you so much that they wouldn’t bat an eyelid. You’re their shiny new money maker.’ Liliana groaned with a chuckle. ‘But I get it. If you want to go back to yours tonight and get yourself together for work, that’s fine. I’m sure I can handle one night away from you.’ 

‘I can’t,’ Liliana laughed, kissing his lips softly at first until he parted them with his own. ‘I want to come back, I just need to go and do my washing and grab some fresh work attire.’ 

She kissed him again and Taron leaned her back slightly before he pulled away just as quickly, leaving Liliana with puckered lips and closed eyes. 

‘I do own a washing machine, you know? You are free to use it whenever you’d like. All it will cost you is-’ 

‘I swear if you say what I think you’re going to say,’ Liliana laughed, her finger in the air to stop whatever Taron was going to say. He laughed at her and wiggled his eyebrows playfully. ‘You are insatiable. 

‘Only for you, Lil.’ 

***

When the toast was gone and Taron had moved the tray to sit on the floor next to the bed, Liliana buried herself back in the covers, pulling them up to her neck and breathing in the smell of Taron. 

‘I don’t want to leave this bed,’ she moaned as she got herself comfortable again. ‘This moment is so perfect, I want to live in it forever.’ 

‘Then don’t. Come here, Love Bug.’ 

Taron’s new pet name made her insides turn to mush. She’d always loved to call Matilda Little Bug and Taron thought it would be fitting if Liliana became Love Bug. Liliana curled into his side happily, and started to stroke the hairs on his chest as he held her against him. 

Her lips found his neck and as she pressed a series of kisses to his warm skin, the growing stubble tickling her chin and her hands wandering further south until she could feel how hard Taron was for her.  Taron ran his hand down her back until he could grab her bum, pulling her in even closer and tangling their legs together. 

She laughed into him as her kisses became more needy and Taron rolled them over so that he hovered over her. It took no time for him to enter her, and they fell into a rhythm, perfectly in sync with one another, until their moans filled the room and sweat beaded on their skin. 

They came undone together and lay wrapped up in one another for a few moments in complete bliss, enamoured with one another and so content. Taron held Liliana against his body as they caught their breaths and he pressed delicate kisses to the top of her head while she lay curled up into him. 

‘I don’t have to be at the theatre until later this afternoon,’ Taron said softly as Liliana pulled the covers back over her body to shield herself from the cool air of the bedroom. 

“What did you have planned for the day, aside from that entirely unnecessary washing?”

“Nothing in particular, once I was done at my flat, I figured I could drop everything off here, and then I planned on getting coffee in Covent Garden or something and writing a bit because I want to get a head start on the second book before I come to see you tonight at the theatre. Why, what were you thinking?’  

‘I thought maybe we could go out for a few hours? Maybe we could get lunch somewhere nice before I go to the theatre.’ 

‘There’s a burger place I wouldn’t mind trying in Leicester Square if you’re up for it?’ Liliana asked excitedly. 

The thought of spending the rest of the morning and the first part of the afternoon with Taron was enough to make her want to jump out of bed and get ready. 

Since getting back from New York, Liliana and Taron had spent pretty much all of their free time together. If Liliana had early morning meetings, she would stay the night with Taron so she was already closer to Central London, allowing her a coveted lay in and cuddles before heading off to work. 

Taron had cleared out a drawer for her to store some spare clothes the first night she stayed over, and she’d done the same for him, deciding that she really didn’t need ten different workout sets when she barely worked out anymore. 

If Liliana texted Taron late at night and told him that she was struggling to sleep, he would pick her up and take her back to his place where he knew she’d sleep comfortably, or if he was too tired, he’d crash at her place with her. Either way, she slept better with him by her side. 

Taron always put one of his hoodies on in the morning if he knew that Liliana was going to be there, and sprayed his cologne on it before folding it neatly on the edge of the bed for when she got there. Without fail, Liliana would walk through the door, head to his bedroom for the hoodie and change into it before getting herself a cup of tea and curling up with a book until he got home. 

Whenever Taron was at the theatre on days where he had two shows, he would send Liliana funny selfies of him falling asleep in his dressing room on his break, or photos of him and Jonathan pranking everyone else there. 

If Liliana wasn’t in the office at any point, she would run to the theatre to take Taron a coffee and snacks, and to give him a quick kiss. On days where they were alone in the dressing room, and if Taron wasn’t too tired from rehearsing or performing, other shenanigans would occur. 

They had so quickly fallen into a routine. Everyday they allowed themselves to grow more in love than the last. They were constantly learning new things about each other, and doing everything they could to show one another just how happy they were that they were finally together. 

  ‘Burgers sound really good right now,’ Taron nodded happily, peeling the covers away from his body so that he could jump in the shower. ‘What’s it called?’ 

‘Honest Burger, I believe. It’s less than a two minute walk from the theatre, and there’s quite a few coffee shops nearby that I can go to and work before I get to the theatre.’ 

‘That sounds good.’ Taron leaned over the bed to kiss Liliana before he ran into the bathroom and turned the shower on. ‘Fancy saving water?’ 

***

‘Hey, Love Bug,’ Taron called sweetly as Liliana rounded the corner to the theatre. He waited at the stage door for her, and pulled her into a large hug when she got close enough. ‘Did you manage to get much work done?’ 

‘Enough,’ Liliana replied softly before she pressed her lips to Taron’s in a soft, chaste kiss. Despite feeling at first that it would be strange to kiss Taron whenever they saw one another, it felt natural to her. To them both. ‘I have what I think should be a pretty good plot down at least. I’ll see what Bea thinks tomorrow before I send it up to Martin.’ 

Taron nodded as he held the door open for Liliana to walk through. As she passed him, he tapped her bum and stifled a laugh when she guffawed at him. 

‘You-’ 

‘Come on,’ he laughed as the door banged closed behind them, ‘let’s get upstairs where it’s a bit warmer. I’m glad you managed to get some work done though. Are you staying for the show still or do you need to get off?’ 

‘I’m staying.’ 

Liliana turned to Taron, standing at eye level thanks to the step she’d climbed onto. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for another kiss. Taron wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close, parting her lips and tasting the coffee she’d had while working. 

‘You two need to get a room,’ a voice echoed down the stairs. Liliana pulled away quickly, already out of breath, and turned to the top of the stairs to see Jonathan Bailey fake gagging at them both. ‘Like seriously, can you keep your hands off each other for longer than two minutes at a time?’ 

‘You’re so funny,’ Taron deadpanned, resting his hand on the bottom of Liliana’s back so he could guide her up the stairs. ‘Come on, Lil, let’s go upstairs. We can chill in my dressing room for a bit before the show starts.’ 

‘Jonathan, do you want to join us? You can tell me all of those stories you said you had about Taron.’ 

Liliana stepped onto the landing and Jonathan immediately wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. 

‘I have new ones to tell you.’ The glint in Jonathan’s eye made Liliana beam and Taron stop in his tracks. 

‘I’m not sure how I feel about the two of you being in cahoots,’ Taron said softly before he walked to Liliana and kissed her cheek. ‘He’s going to steal you away from me.’ 

Jonathan chuckled and kissed Liliana’s other cheek. ‘Don’t listen to him, darling. He’s just jealous of our ever-lasting love.’ 

‘You two are as bad as one another,’ Liliana laughed. She walked into the dressing room and immediately flopped onto the sofa near the window. ‘Now, whoever gets here first gets my undying attention for the next hour.’ 

***

Liliana looked around her in awe. Every seat in the theatre had been filled with people who were going to see Taron perform. She could tell that some of them were fans of his because they got giddy when he walked on stage, and Liliana smiled to herself, flashes of that morning playing around her head. 

Unlike the first two times she’d gone to see the show, Liliana had booked her own ticket, and had chosen to sit in the very middle of the front row in the Circle. She wanted an unobstructed view for the first time she would be able to see the show from start to finish, and from where she was she could see Taron perfectly. 

Whenever Taron averted his eyes up to where Liliana sat, she would wink at him softly, aching to see the ever so tiny upturn of his lips when she did. To everyone in the room, who was laughing when something funny happened and gasping when the lights suddenly went out, it looked as though Taron was finding a spot in the room to keep his attention. 

Liliana watched the show and her heart ached. As she watched Taron and Jonathan fighting their emotions, and the struggle Jonathan’s character had over the desire to have children and start a family, Liliana felt the familiar pang of regret for not thinking about Matilda every waking hour. 

Life after Christmas had been amazing for Liliana, and she’d been distracted by Taron and their budding relationship more than she would have thought. It wasn’t that she didn’t think about Matilda. It was more that Matilda wasn’t her first and last thought every day like she was before. 

Liliana hadn’t seen Matilda since Boxing Day when she left Aberystwyth last, and as much as she really didn’t want to have to see her mum ever again, Liliana had to see Matilda. As the show came to an end and everybody stood up to give a standing ovation, which was entirely deserved, Liliana booked herself a train ticket home for two weeks later. 

She knew that Taron would understand her need to go to Wales. If anything, she could see him offering to take her back in the car so she didn’t have to get the train. 

But she needed to do it on her own. Matilda deserved to know why her big sister, who she loved more than anything else, wasn’t around much. Liliana wanted to explain everything to Matilda. Why she left Aberystwyth, why she left at Christmas, why she wrote the book. Matilda needed to know that it wasn’t her fault that Liliana didn’t go to Wales often. 

Liliana stayed in her seat until most of the theatre was empty before she made her way down the stairs and towards the stage. Taron opened the hidden doorway and ushered Liliana in quickly. 

She wrapped her arms around his body tightly the second she could and held him against her happily, breathing him in and kissing the spot of his neck she could reach without going onto her tiptoes. 

‘I’m so proud of you,’ she mumbled into his skin as he pushed the door closed again. ‘So incredibly proud.’ 

‘I did alright then? I was weirdly nervous with you being in the audience. I wanted to be perfect for you.’ 

Liliana pushed Taron away enough to look at him fully. ‘You did amazing, baby. So amazing. I find the fact that you got nervous very sweet though. I have a gift for you as a congratulations on a great show, but it’s at home…in your bed…naked.’ 

Taron’s eyes lit up as he leaned down to kiss Liliana, his hands finding purchase on her rear. ‘That sounds fun.’ 

‘I’m going to Aber in a couple of weeks,’ Liliana said quickly. ‘I need to go and see Matilda. I’m sorry it’s last minute, and I hope you hadn’t made any plans but I need to-’ 

‘Lil, it’s okay. Do you need me to drive you there? I’m more than happy to. I’ll even come with you in general so that you’re not on your own in the house with Eliza.’ 

Taron knew how hard it was for Liliana to go back to Aberystwyth in general, but he knew with the way she’d told him she needed to see Matilda, her eyes not quite as sparkly as they normally were when her sister was mentioned, that she was going to talk about important things with her, and he knew how difficult that conversation would be for Liliana. 

Liliana smiled at him softly and leaned herself against him, her hands gripping the hem of his t-shirt tightly. ‘I’ll be okay,’ she mumbled against him. ‘I need it to just be Matilda and I when I talk to her. And I need to go back and spend the time with Matilda without being distracted by you and your body, and your lips.’ 

Taron leaned down to kiss her softly before he nodded in understanding. 

‘I also couldn’t possibly pull you away from work. Not after I saw you perform tonight.’ 

It was then that Taron realised just how much Liliana would always put everybody else first, and he decided that he would always put her first. He wouldn’t allow her to become an afterthought any longer. She deserved to be put first and to be somebody’s priority, and Taron was going to make her his. 

‘You should have heard the group of girls in the row behind me. They kept giggling and ogling you the entire time. And when you looked at me, they thought you were looking at them and would fangirl so hard.’ 

‘I spent my entire performance ogling you, Love Bug. They weren’t even on my radar. But I’m glad they got a kick out of my love for you. If you don’t need me there with you, do you want me to drive you?’ 

Liliana shook her head. ‘I’ve booked a train. Thank you though. I leave on the 8th and come back on the 15th.’ 

‘You’re going for a week?’ Liliana nodded. ‘Are you sure that you’re going to be okay for that long on your own? I’m only asking because I don’t want you to have to go through what you went through at Christmas again.’ 

‘I need to go for the week. I have too much to talk to Matilda about, and I’ve not seen her since Christmas which was a shit show anyway so I need to make it up to her. Eliza is working while I’m there anyway so she’ll see it as free childcare for Matilda with it being the school holidays, and I can make it so I have to see her as little as possible.’ 

Taron looked at Liliana sadly, kissing the top of her head as he linked their fingers together to walk up to the dressing rooms where they could get ready to go back to his flat. To go home. 

‘I don’t like the sound of you being used as free childcare, Lil.’ 

‘That’s the thing,’ Liliana said with a soft smile, trying her best to show Taron that she was okay. ‘Eliza, which is now what I’m referring to her as, will see it that way. I see it as uninterrupted time with Matilda where I’m free to do whatever I want with her without having to ask permission. I’ve already got a list of things I want to do with her, including a girly shopping day and a cinema trip.

‘It’s going to be a week of Matilda being my only priority. I’ve emailed Martin and booked in a last minute week off work for ‘writing purposes’ so I have no work to do while I’m there. I will obviously call and text you all the time too but I want to spend as much time just Matilda and I as I can. It’s what she deserves.’ 

They rounded the corner into Taron’s dressing room and Liliana sat on the sofa near the window while Taron turned on the tiny shower in the corner of the room. 

Liliana’s head fell to her shoulder as she looked at Taron in awe. Her breath caught in her throat when he pulled his t-shirt away from his upper half and pushed his trousers down his legs. He turned to her and smirked when he saw her gawping at him. 

‘Like what you see?’ 

‘Yeah, I do,’ Liliana smiled happily.

Taron climbed into the shower after he’d taken his underwear off, but Liliana could still see him through the frosted glass door. She watched as he cleaned his body, her mind running to multiple different places, and her body aching to be closer to him. 

April 8th, 2022

Taron reached behind his head awkwardly to shut off the alarm he’d set the night before. He wanted to take Liliana to the train station seeing as though she wouldn’t let him drive her back to Aberystwyth. Liliana had insisted that he didn’t need to because it would mean he was going out of his way before work and she was a grown woman who could get to a train station on her own, but Taron insisted that he wanted to take her. 

In the end, he had persuaded her over to his side in a way that only he could, and she agreed to let him drive her to the station while she was putty in his hands. They hadn’t fallen asleep until it was past midnight, so Taron made sure to set an alarm himself so that they wouldn’t sleep in. 

He turned back around and snuggled into Liliana who was curled up in his arms. Smiling down at her, Taron tried to burn the moment to his memory. In the four weeks since they finally got together, there hadn’t been a single night where they hadn’t slept in the same bed. Going a week without feeling the warmth of Liliana pressed against him, of him pulling her closer to him when he woke up in the middle of the night, of waking up to her snuggled into him happily sleeping, was going to be hard for him. 

Not wanting to wake her up abruptly, Taron pressed his lips to Liliana’s to rouse her from her sleep. He continued to press kisses to her until he could feel her kiss him back, a soft moan of happiness vibrating through her, and even then he continued to kiss her until his second alarm went off five minutes after. 

‘Come on, Love Bug, I think we should get up now if you want to make your train.’ 

‘But your bed is comfortable, and you’re here. If it weren’t for Matilda I would not be going today,’ Liliana mumbled against Taron as she pushed herself against him more. His skin was warm against her front and she wanted to run her hands down his chest and continue with the previous night’s activities, but Taron pulled himself away before she could. ‘What are you doing?’ 

‘I love you, and as much as I would love to start something fun right now, you really do have to get up and get ready to leave. Do you want something to eat before you go? In fact, ignore that, I’m going to go and make you some breakfast and a cuppa tea. What do you fancy?’ 

Liliana was groggy as she slowly began to sit up in the bed, pulling the covers over her chest to stop from being exposed to the cool air of the room. ‘Hmm, can I just have toast and a banana please? Oh and a coffee. A big coffee. I didn’t sleep much last night.’ 

‘And whose fault is that?’ Taron asked teasingly. 

‘Oh absolutely yours.’ 

‘Whatever helps you sleep at night, Love Bug.’ Taron smiled as he leaned down to kiss her once more before he headed out to the kitchen to make breakfast. 

They had just over an hour before they had to leave and Liliana’s suitcase was packed near the front door already, so all she had to do was get ready and then put her toiletries in the suitcase before she left. 

She decided to take it steady getting ready so she grabbed one of Taron’s hoodies from his drawer and pulled it over her body, holding the sleeves like little paws in her hands. Walking into the kitchen, she smiled at Taron. 

He smiled back at her when he saw her walk through and he motioned for her to sit at one of the barstools at the kitchen island just as he finished her cup of coffee. 

Liliana took the mug from him when she had sat down and thanked him quietly before she took her first sip. Her eyes fell closed at the first drop of warmth hitting her tongue and she sighed in delight. 

‘How are you feeling about the trip?’ Taron asked when he’d finished buttering toast and joined her at the island. ‘Are you ready?’ 

‘I’m excited to see Matilda, obviously. I love spending time with her and getting to see her, but I’m also so nervous. I’ve hidden this part of me from Matilda for so long and I’m so scared that she’s going to see me differently once she knows the truth.’ 

‘Being nervous is normal,’ Taron assured her as he kissed the back of her hand delicately, ‘but I’m sure it’ll all be okay. She won’t see you as anything other than her big sister who she loves. I saw the way she looked at you at Christmas, Lil. The love and pride she has over you won’t disappear just because you share your truth with her. If anything, it’ll grow.’ 

Liliana smiled sadly. ‘I hope so. I’m also nervous about seeing mum again. I haven’t seen her since Christmas when…well, you know.’ 

Taron’s hand lifted to rub Liliana’s back as she took a bite of toast. He could feel her leg shaking underneath the table and he wanted to wrap her up in bubble wrap and protect her from ever feeling that way again. He had promised to protect her and he worried that he wouldn’t be able to protect her when he was in London and she was in Aberystwyth. 

‘I know, baby. I know. You know my mum’s door is always open. She’d be happy to see you while you’re there, if you have any free time. You could even take Matilda around and introduce her to the girls, I’m sure they’d get on like a house on fire.’ 

Liliana looked at Taron and gulped before she took a deep breath to try and calm herself. When she’d first woken up, all her nerves had been at the back of her mind, but the closer it got to leaving, the more her back heated up and her skin crawled with anxiety. 

‘That would be nice. I was hoping to maybe take an hour to see her. I meant it when I promised that I wouldn’t be a stranger anymore.’ 

‘How can you be a stranger when you’re sleeping with her son every night?’ Taron asked playfully, leaning forward to catch Liliana’s lips with his own. ‘She’ll love to see you.’ 

‘She’s going to know,’ Liliana said when she pulled away from Taron’s lips to eat more. ‘She’s going to take one look at me and know that we’re together. I don’t have a poker face when it comes to Tina. You know that. She took one look at me at Christmas and I broke. Oh god.’ 

‘Relax,’ Taron laughed. ‘Everything is going to be okay. What time do you get back next week?’ 

Liliana was thankful for the change of subject, and immediately grabbed her phone to check her train times to get home. 

‘My train gets into Euston at seven thirty. Am I coming back here or am I going back to mine?’ 

Taron swallowed his last piece of toast before replying. ‘I’ll pick you up and you can come back here. We’ll have a chilled night and you can tell me all about what you did with Matilda. How does that sound?’ 

‘It sounds as perfect as you.’ 

***

Liliana could see just how busy the train station was even from outside, and the nerves that Taron had worked so hard to ease for her came barreling to the surface again. Taron noticed immediately and unbuckled his seatbelt so he could lean over and pull her into his body. 

‘You can do this,’ he whispered into her hair. ‘You are stronger than you think. You show me a power that is strong enough to bring sun to the darkest days. I love you so much, Lil.’ 

‘I love you too, T. I’ll see you next week.’ 

Liliana kissed Taron three times on the lips before she opened her door and stepped out. Taron followed her and got her suitcase from the boot for her. He held her to him in a long hug before letting her go. 

‘You’ve got this. I’ll see you next week. If you need me, call me. I’ll be there faster than you can say my name. I don’t care if I’m in the middle of a performance. You are my priority.’ 

Liliana smiled at him as she pecked his cheek and stepped towards the station. When she got to the door she turned around and saw Taron standing by his car still, his hand in the air waving to her. She blew him a kiss before walking through the doors and into the station where she found her platform and put her earphones in. 

She spent the entire train ride listening to Harry Styles on repeat, thankful that his music helped subside the nerves, if only for a little while. When Sign of The Times came on, she smiled to herself as memories of her day in New York with Taron played on repeat in her mind. 

As her mind wandered back to the best parts of the day in New York, she couldn’t stop her mind from also wandering back to the awful part of that day. With her anxiety already through the roof because of going home and having to be around Eliza, it was all too easy for the intrusive thoughts to creep in about Taron as well. 

The past month with Taron had easily been the best of Liliana’s life. She had finally run into love rather than away from it, and Taron made her feel safer and more comfortable than anybody ever had before. But she was also acutely aware that the other shoe could still drop–and most probably would, given her track record–given the amount of baggage that she took into the relationship. 

Taron was comforting and understood her life and how hard she had it now, but how would that change in a year? Or in five years? Or if they ever got married and had children? How long could he continue to be there for her before he began to resent her and the emotional damage she carried with her everyday? 

Liliana was already so deeply and emotionally attached to Taron that she knew if, and when, he decided he’d had enough of her, that it would break her completely. That thought scared her more than anything else. She’d lost him before and it had broken her. To lose him again would shatter every piece of her. 

Tears threatened to spill over as she let the intrusive thoughts ruin her mood even more than it was already, and it was only when the train jolted roughly around a bend that she snapped out of it and wiped the tears away. Harry was still playing through her earphones and she had to pause the music to come around. 

She hadn’t realised that she had spent most of the train ride distracted by her thoughts, and that she was only thirty minutes away from Aberystwyth. She resolved herself to get her emotions under control so that she could be strong for Matilda, no matter the daggers that Eliza would throw her way throughout the week. 

When the nerves come back and music does nothing to help, she opens her messages with Taron and scrolls back to find all of the photos and videos that Taron had sent to her over the weeks since they’d been together, including one that he sent her of Jonathan running around the theatre demanding to be called Viscount.

Liliana recalled each adorable text and all of the selfies Taorn had sent soothed her mind and put a big smile on her face. They had such a way of reassuring her that Taron cared for her deeply. 

Wiping under her eyes, Liliana could only imagine how crazy she must have looked to everyone else on the train carriage with her, with her smudged mascara and smile. She chuckled to herself softly. 

Just as she went to watch another video, a text from Taron came through and her heart fluttered at his name. 

I love you. How are you feeling? Xx

Liliana took a deep breath before typing her reply to Taron, checking the carriage to make sure that the ticket conductor wasn’t on their way over. 

I love you too. I won’t lie, I am shitting myself. But I don’t think I’m telling her today which is helping. I don’t want to put a damper on the entire trip. Might leave it until the night before I come home. Is that a bad idea? Xx 

Liliana watched as the three dots appeared almost instantly underneath her message. 

If you feel like that is going to help then do that, Love Bug. If you do decide that you need me there just text me okay? I meant it when I said I’ll be there faster than you can say my name. I promise you. You don’t have to be on your own for this. Or ever xx

That’s one of many reasons why I love you. I promise I’ll let you know if I need you. I’m almost in Aber now so I’ll message you later when I’m settled xx

Don’t forget my mum’s door is always open if you need it xx

***

April 13th, 2022 

The first few days of Liliana’s trip back to Aberystwyth were filled with activities with Matilda, as she had promised herself to do. 

She had bought train tickets to Birmingham so that they could have a girly shopping day in all of the big stores they didn’t have in Aber, and Liliana introduced Matilda to frappuccinos from Starbucks. 

Taron sent Liliana money so that they could go for a meal while they were there, much to Liliana’s protests. They wound up eating in a fancy restaurant and Matilda couldn’t stop gushing about how much fun she was having, which Liliana was thankful for.

Liliana took Matilda to the cinema where they ate their weight in pick and mix, and drank more Tango Ice Blasts than they could count. On the way home they had to stop multiple times to use the toilet, and when they got back and had to eat the casserole that Eliza had made for them, they both looked at each other in regret before laughing and forcing the food down. 

Matilda had crawled into Liliana’s bed most nights and slept curled up beside her, which Liliana loved. She’d never gotten to have sleepovers with Matilda and she’d hated it. Each time she felt the bed dip, she would scoot over enough for Matilda to climb in before wrapping her in her arms and holding her tightly. 

They spent an unseasonably warm day at the beach where they built sandcastles and buried one another’s feet in the sand. They ate ice cream and fish and chips–which they had to shield from seagulls–and ran into the water and stayed until their feet went numb from the cold. 

Matilda told Liliana all about school and her best friends, and the one boy she thought was cute. Liliana told Matilda about her time in school, and how she and Taron used to go to Constitution Hill all of the time to sit and watch the sea and talk about things they’d kept secret. 

When Matilda asked Liliana if she could show her the hill, Liliana didn’t hesitate, though she did make sure that they went up in the funicular because she was too tired to walk all the way up. They sat in the same spot that Liliana and Taron used to sit in, and Liliana was tempted to tell Matilda about everything while they were there. 

The hill had always been the place where she could reveal her secrets without feeling like they would get anywhere else. Everything she said was washed away with the sea, floating away so that she felt light. But as she looked at Matilda, who looked at the sea with the same awe that Liliana did, she knew she couldn’t ruin the moment. 

On days where it was raining, they spent the day at home watching films and baking. One day they made pizzas for everyone and despite the tension between Liliana and Eliza, they all sat and ate together in the living room while watching The Princess Diaries, Matilda’s new favourite film.

Liliana had told herself to be strong for Matilda throughout the week and she had stayed true to her promise, even on the days when Eliza wasn’t working and would drop in her usual passive-aggressive comments at every opportunity. Liliana took each comment on the chin for Matilda’s sake, despite her instinct being to run out of the house and straight to Tina’s where she could wait for Taron to get to her and hold her close. 

Between shows in a two show day, Taron Facetimed Liliana so that he could catch up with her but also so that he could talk to Matilda. She was just as enamoured by him as she was at Christmas, and she talked his ear off about school and the things she had done with Liliana. 

The entire time, Taron listened intently and Liliana just watched the two from the side, smiling to herself. Matilda wouldn’t stop talking about Taron when they got off the phone, and had asked if they could talk to him again the next day. 

Liliana had explained that he was busy with work but that she would ask when he was free next so that they could chat to him again. 

Most nights before she fell asleep, and before Matilda joined her in her bedroom, Liliana would cry to Taron on the phone. She felt as though she had missed out on so much of Matilda’s life, and missed seeing her grow up from the tiny baby she first met to an almost teenager who had crushes. Taron could tell that Liliana struggled during their calls, and it broke his heart that he wasn’t there for her where he could hold her in his arms and soothe her. 

‘I couldn’t ever live near Eliza again, but I wish I lived closer to Matilda,’ she told Taron one evening when he called her. ‘Does that even make any sense?’ 

‘It does, Lil,’ Taron replied softly. He’d just climbed into bed after work and rolled over to face Liliana’s side. He missed her more than he thought he would. ‘Do you want to go to my mums? I can text her now and tell her that you’re staying. My bedroom is probably all set up.’ 

‘I’ll be okay. I’ve promised Matilda that we’ll go out for breakfast tomorrow and I still have to tell her everything. Thank you though, honey.’ 

Liliana could hear Taron’s smile through the phone. And she could feel his anxiety and worry for her too. 

‘You are an incredible big sister. You know that, right? The best big sister ever.’

‘You’re just saying that to make me feel better,’ Liliana pouted even though Taron wouldn’t be able to see. She’d hardly been there for Matilda and the guilt ate at her daily. 

‘No I’m not. I’m not just saying that. Look at everything you’d done with her these past few days. You’ve travelled to Birmingham, you’ve spent time at the beach and gone to the cinema. You took her up the hill and made forts and homemade pizzas. You’ve watched all of the films she’s wanted to see and you’ve made sure that she knows you’re there.

‘You’ve done more with Matilda in these past few days than I can guarantee anybody has done with her in a long while. And she’s going to remember this time for the rest of her life, I know it. You didn’t see the way she looked at you when we Facetimed. She looks at you like you hung the moon and the stars specifically for her.’ 

‘If I could have, I would.’ 

‘I know you would have. Which is why you’re the best big sister.’ 

‘She turns eleven this year and I bought her a build-a-bear in Birmingham. I recorded a voice message telling her how much I love her so that she can squeeze it and hear my voice whenever she wants to. How sad is that?’ Liliana let out a breathy laugh as she snuggled further into the covers. 

Time was ticking on and she knew that it wouldn’t be long before Matilda came crawling into bed with her. As much as she was excited to get back home and be with Taron, she would miss having her little sister go to her for comfort on a night. 

‘That’s not sad,’ Taron said sincerely, and Liliana could hear the crack in his voice. ‘That is the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard. And I’m getting choked up thinking about it.’ 

‘Aw, T, you’re adorable. Like a little teddy bear. I am also so sorry that I’m burdening you with all of this. You’re probably exhausted from work and now you’re on the phone with me and I’m foisting all this on you. Get some sleep. I love you.’

Liliana choked back her own tears because she wanted to be able to compose herself before Matilda came into her room. 

‘You are never a burden, Liliana. Please don’t think that. And it isn’t a burden to share how you feel at all. You can always talk to me about anything. I’m always going to be in your corner, Lil. I hope you know that.’ Taron had hoped she could hear the sincerity in his voice. 

March 6th, 2022

The steam that filled Liliana’s bathroom allowed her to breathe for what felt like the first time since she’d left Taron’s hotel room in New York. After an almost eight hour plane ride where she hadn’t been able to sleep, a hot shower had been first on her to-do list when she finally fell through her door. A shower in her own bathroom. Something she hadn’t realised she would miss as much as she did. 

As soon as the first drops of hot water hit her skin, she sighed happily and let her head fall forward so that the water could trickle onto the back of her neck and down the length of her back. Goosebumps raced to the surface of her skin and she shivered involuntarily. Being away from home for almost a month had stressed her out more than she thought it would have, but that stress washed away instantly in the shower. 

Every few days on tour she had been in yet another unknown bed, having nobody to talk to once Evelyn and Jacob left her room to go to bed themselves or do some work that they’d put off during the day. When she’d been in Boston, she’d been able to text Taron but after everything that happened in New York, her texts went unanswered, leaving her alone with her thoughts and the incessant nagging feeling of wanting to be home. 

In the two weeks between leaving Taron’s hotel room and getting home and him being at the airport waiting for her, she could count on one hand the number of messages he’d replied to. Things had ended so badly in New York and it was all she could think of on the flight home. She thought about going to his flat to see him and talk to him. But she didn’t need to. 

When she saw him, she had to rub her eyes to make sure that she wasn’t seeing things. He was the last person she had expected to see when she got to the arrivals lounge at Heathrow. He’d made a sign reading ‘NY Bestselling Author Liliana Esme’ and held it in front of him with a grin just as cheesy as the sign. She ran into his arms and held him tight. 

He held her back just as tightly after he dropped the sign to the floor. When they finally pulled apart, Taron grabbed the handle of her suitcase while she bent down to get the sign. He looked at her curiously to which she’d told him that she wanted to keep it. 

Taron hadn’t mentioned anything about New York during their journey to her flat, or when they got back and she’d told him to make himself comfortable while she had a shower. Taron’s hoodie sat unfolded at the end of her bed from where she’d peeled it off before her shower. She’d lost count of how many times she’d worn it since that night in New York. 

Neither of them had uttered a word about that night and as much as Liliana wanted to ignore everything that had happened and just continue as they were before, she knew that it would be near impossible. They were so close to sharing their first kiss and then she’d just…walked out on him and then hadn’t spoken to him since. Not for lack of trying. 

The shower had been so hot that as she stepped out, the room was filled with a humid mist. She cleared the bathroom mirror with the corner of her towel and took a minute to really look at herself. Her skin was dull and her under eyes were such a deep purple that it looked like she’d been in a boxing ring with Mike Tyson. She tugged and pulled at her face, inspecting it close up. She let out a frustrated sigh and let her hands drop to her sides. It would take some serious skin care to make her feel better. 

The moisturiser she used everyday was still at the bottom of her suitcase and she didn’t want to mess around trying to find it so she grabbed the expensive one that she kept for special occasions from the drawers next to the sink. She massaged it into her face and let her eyes fall closed. With the steam in the room, the feeling of exceptionally clean skin, and the smell of her moisturiser, she could close her eyes and pretend that she was at a spa being treated to the good stuff. 

Even just a tiny bit of moisturiser was enough for her to feel a little better but the tips of her fingers were tingling from the dryness of her skin. She made a mental note to give herself a full at home facial the following day. Maybe she would ask Evelyn to join and they could make a girls’ night out of it. 

Her hair dripped water onto the tiled floor as she padded through to the bedroom to get changed. The sun had started to set over the London horizon– not that she could see it fully from her flat– and a beautiful golden stream of light flooded the floor, warming her feet as she scrunched her toes into the carpet, one of her favourite feelings. 

‘Taron,’ she called through the flat from the bottom of the stairs that led to the other rooms, ‘I’m just going to get changed so please don’t leave whatever room you’re in for a couple of minutes.’ 

‘Okay,’ he responded from the kitchen. She could hear the soft chuckle that laced his words and the corners of her lips twitched into a soft smile. ‘Where the fuck do you keep your mugs, by the way? This kitchen might be tiny but it’s like a maze!’ 

‘Cupboard behind the door,’ she laughed, holding the towel a little tighter around herself. ‘Why?’ 

‘Because unless you want a cuppa tea in a pan big enough to share with the entire population of London, I need to find a mug for you.’ 

‘Tea?’ She asked happily, her eyes glazing over at the thought of a proper cuppa. ‘A pan of tea sounds heavenly right now. Do you know how much I paid for a pack of twenty tea bags in New York? Eight freaking dollars! Nearly seven quid for tea bags!’ 

‘Daylight robbery if you ask me,’ Taron joked happily. Liliana smiled, happy that they were able to ignore what had happened for a little while and just be again. ‘Right, I know you’re a weirdo who has a specific mug that you like for tea and I can guarantee that it isn’t this aztec one at the front of the cupboard, so which mug do you want?’ 

Liliana’s heart soared at Taron and she took a deep breath to stop herself from doing anything rash. ‘I’ll have that one.’ 

‘Lil, which mug do you want? I know you enough to know that this is the one you absolutely do not want to use.’ 

‘You’re going to think I’m weird though.’ 

‘Too late for that,’ he laughed. ‘Which mug?’ 

Okay so put your hand on the purple heart mug, then move it back two and to the right once. You should land on a black mug that has a little patch of weird looking sunflowers on it. It’s my colour changing one. The mug behind that one should be a blue Cath Kidston one with clocks all over it. I’ll have that one please.’ 

She could picture Taron shaking his head as he blindly followed her instructions, and she winced when she heard a few of her mugs move and clash against one another in the cupboard. It took a lot for her to not run into the kitchen and do it herself, but she knew that she could trust Taron to get one. And he was being nice enough to make her a cuppa. The worst case was that she had to reorganise the cupboard when he was gone. 

‘You truly are the weirdest person I know,’ he sighed. ‘Who remembers exactly where each mug is in their cupboard? To the point that even after being away for a few weeks, they still know? Oh I know, that would be Liliana Esme.’ 

‘I like specific mugs and if people use my favourite ones I get really antsy and can’t deal with it.’ Her toes curled at the thought of someone using her best mugs. She shook her body to rid herself of the uncomfortable feeling. ‘But shut up and let me get dressed, please.’ 

‘One last question. What mug can I use?’ 

‘Whichever one you want to.’ 

‘But you just said-’ 

‘Use whichever you want. I need to get dressed.’ 

The sound of the kettle boiling motivated Liliana to get dressed a little quicker. A proper brew was all she needed to feel better. A hot mug filled with steamy tea sweetened with two small spoonfuls of sugar. She could taste it already. 

‘Lil, you have no milk!’ 

‘Oh for fuck’s sake. It’s fine, I’ll have it black please. But I’ll have an extra sugar.’ 

‘It’s fine, I’ll run to the shop quickly. What milk do you have?’ 

‘Taron, it’s fine,’ she called as she pulled her cycling shorts up her legs, jumping on the spot to get them to where she wanted them to sit on her waist. ‘I’ll have a black tea tonight and then I’ll go to the shop tomorrow morning. It’s all good, I promise.’ 

She quickly threw on an oversized t-shirt and slid her feet into the slippers at the top of the stairs. Taron fumbled around the kitchen, not sure where anything he needed was. Even though he’d been to the flat a number of times since Christmas, he hadn’t been the one to make drinks. 

‘I can nip to the shop. It’s two seconds down the road and you’ve been away and need a proper brew.’ 

‘Taron,’ Liliana whispered as she got to the kitchen. He hadn’t been looking at the doorway as he spoke so he’d missed the way she smiled fondly at him, and the way that she’d taken a long, deep breath. ‘About New York.’ 

It was a drastic change of subject but Liliana knew that if she didn’t talk to him about it then, she wouldn’t have talked about it at all. And they’d both avoided the conversation for way too long. 

‘It’s alright,’ he said quickly, turning around so that he could look at her. He let out a breathy laugh when he saw her hair in the towel at the top of her head but turned serious instantly when he saw how serious she was. ‘You were vulnerable, and I overstepped the mark completely. We don’t have to have this conversation right now. Or ever. I shouldn’t have done what I did. It was stupid and-’ 

‘You didn’t do anything wrong,’ Liliana whispered. She bit her top lip into her mouth and let it go slowly before she continued. ‘You were so sweet and caring and I just…shut you down. It’s all I’ve ever known. I’ve never been good at the whole feelings thing. Even when I was younger.’ 

‘I did do something wrong,’ he insisted, stepping closer to her, wanting to be as close as he could without making her feel uncomfortable. ‘You had just told me everything I wanted to know, you let me understand you fully and then I went to try and kiss you? That’s not a good thing, Liliana. I would have been taking advantage of you. You told me in New York that you always felt safe at my house growing up?’ 

‘I did,’ she responded, resting her body against the doorframe. She pulled the towel away from her hair and threw it at the washing machine in the corner of the room. A few stray drops of water fell onto her back as she brushed through her hair with her fingers so that it looked a little less dishevelled. ‘I still do. At Christmas when I walked into your mum’s house, something happened and I don’t know how to even begin explaining it. I haven’t felt that safe for so long. And then you walked in with the girls and I just…’ 

Liliana trailed off and ran her hands down the length of her face with a sigh. She didn’t know how to articulate the feelings that ran rampant through her. There wasn’t one specific emotion that she felt, it was more like a hurricane of different ones blowing around her head at such a speed it made her dizzy. 

‘Pictured a life where you had a family coming home to you and you got scared because you worry that any relationship you ever have is going to end like your mum and dad’s did?’ Taron finished for her. 

Liliana nodded solemnly with a small hum.‘I can’t put kids through the shit I went through. It wouldn’t be fair to them. For them to get to my age and still have nightmares about the things that they heard. To be so scared to fall in love because the worry of things ending badly outweighs every positive that could possibly happen. Even when the guy they love is the most amazing person they’ve ever met, who knows how weird they are and that they like to use a specific mug for their tea; who will laugh at them singing in the street rather than telling them to shut up; who will surprise them in New York just so they could spend time together. How did you know? That I felt like that?’ 

‘Because walking into the house that day felt more like walking into a home than it has since I was a teenager. Since you were there,’ Taron said softly, reaching forward to grab Liliana’s hands. She let his fingers graze hers before she pulled back slowly. Taron didn’t flinch. He let her pull away despite wanting to wrap her in a bone crushing hug. ‘When you told me that you were leaving and going to Edinburgh for uni, I felt physically sick for days. I thought that I was going to lose you. I guess in the end, I did. But I’ve been here this entire time. Right here, waiting. And I don’t want to wait for you anymore.

‘I don’t want to think about all the what ifs that have been running around in my head for all these years. What if I’d told you how I really felt? What if I ran away to Edinburgh with you? What if I’d tried harder? I want to try now. I want to be everything you’ve ever wanted, and all you’ll ever need. I know that you’re scared, and you have every right to be scared with everything that you’ve gone through, but I love you. 

‘I am in love with you, Liliana Esme. Whole, painful, true love. It’s like I have fireworks going off in my body continuously when you’re around, my love for you burns so intensely that I can feel it in my fingertips. I’m not going to hurt you. I would never hurt you. Lil, you must know that after everything you’ve ever told me, I will always be in your corner. As your friend or as your partner. I want this. I want you. I already know that if you feel the same way that it’ll be hard for you to fully let yourself feel and be happy, but I am so in love with you that I’ll go at whatever pace you feel comfortable with. Even if it takes years, I’ll be here.’

Liliana could do nothing but stare at him. Out of all the possible scenarios that she’d imagined when she thought about the conversation they would have about New York, standing in her kitchen doorway with wet hair dripping down her back, Taron leaning against the worktop with two mugs behind him, his hands at either side of his body holding him up and his eyes growing red with tears wasn’t one of them. 

‘Okay maybe I hadn’t overstepped in New York. But I definitely have now.’ Taron pushed himself forward and towards the door. ‘I’ll just g-’ 

‘I haven’t slept in days,’ Liliana confessed, blocking him in the kitchen so that he couldn’t leave. ‘Because all I can think about is you.’ 

Taron stepped back into the kitchen and sniffed quietly as he looked at Liliana. He didn’t say anything else. Partly because he knew that she hadn’t finished talking, but partly because he didn’t know what to say. He’d poured the most vulnerable part of himself out to her and now the ball was in her court. 

‘When I left your room in New York, I cried myself to sleep hugging your hoodie. I thought I’d ruined everything. It was like I’d just gotten you back and my life was starting to feel like mine again, and then I left you and I just thought that I’d lost you again. I didn’t know how I was going to survive losing you a second time when I was barely hanging on the first time.’ 

‘Lil,’ Taron started, but Liliana cut him off with a soft shake of her head. 

‘They talk about falling in love like it’s this big, sudden feeling that you only know when you know. Love is described as this thing that you fall into, like a door opens and you realise that you’re somewhere new, and that you love the person in front of you. You go from feeling a kind of adoration for them to being in love with them. But nobody talks about falling in love slowly, over time, to the point where you don’t even realise that you’ve fallen in love until you’re watching them read your little sister a story before bed on Christmas Eve.’ 

They both stood in silence for a few seconds, Taron looking at Liliana and Liliana looking at the floor. Her eyes were damp and she couldn’t contain the tears that were starting to fall down her cheeks, no matter how hard she tried. When she finally looked back to Taron, his expression mirrored hers, tears falling and a grin plastered on his face. 

‘I am in love with you, Taron. That feel-so-much-you-get-scared kind of love. The kind of love that terrifies you because you’ve never felt that way before. The kind of love that makes you my every thought, and the only person I ever want to think about. I’ve lost track of the number of times I’d lay in bed trying to sleep and wondered what would have happened if I had told you sooner. Before I left for Edinburgh. Because I have loved you for longer than that. I’ve loved you since that day we got caught in a rainstorm at the top of the hill.’ 

Taron reached forward for her once more and she didn’t pull away. She let herself fall into him, and he caught her. He caught her and held her so tightly that she knew that she was safe. That she would always be safe as long as he was around. 

‘Fall,’ he said firmly. ‘And I’ll catch you. I’ll always catch you.’ 

It took milliseconds for tears to fall down Liliana’s cheeks, but Taron wiped them away with his thumb the second he saw them. He let his eyes close as he held her close to his front again where he rocked her gently and kissed the top of her head so softly she could have mistaken it for a light breeze brushing around her. 

‘I won’t let you go like I did before. I won’t let you leave thinking that you weren’t loved. Because as long as I’m around, you’re always going to be loved.’ 

‘Taron.’ She pulled out of his embrace just enough to look at him fully, a small smile tugging at her lips when she found him already looking at her. ‘I love you.’ 

Taron caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers, letting the heat from her skin erupt volcanoes in his stomach. He could smell her shampoo and her shower gel and it was all too much and not enough of her. For so long he’d wondered what it would feel like to have her in his arms, to know that they both felt the same. 

Liliana looked up at him gently as she fisted his t-shirt to keep him as close to her as she could. It had taken her too long to open up to him about how she felt towards him to let him go now. He was already watching her when her eyes met his again. She took a deep breath and her chest pushed against his more. 

A noise halfway between a gasp and a moan escaped her and her cheeks turned a deeper shade of red. Taron laughed softly and hooked his fingers under her chin to pull her face up to him. Her breath jittered a tiny bit at the way he looked at her, his eyes a shade brighter than she’d ever known with the most beautiful twinkle. Liliana would never look at a star the same way again. Not after she’d seen them in Taron’s eyes. 

His eyes flicked from hers down to her lips before shifting back up to her eyes again. He wet his lips as Liliana sighed softly at him. 

‘Lil,’ he whispered as he caressed her cheek once more, tiny fires igniting under her skin with each pass of his fingers, ‘I’ve wanted to kiss you every day since we were eighteen years old on top of that god forsaken hill getting caught in the rain.’ 

Taron’s confession had both of their hearts beating faster. Liliana bit her bottom lip into her mouth as she stared at him. She couldn’t look away. He was intoxicating, her favourite bottle of wine that she simply couldn’t have one sip of. She had to have it all. She wanted to have all of him, whatever the consequences. 

‘I’ve wanted to kiss you forever, Lil. I wanted to kiss you on your happiest days. I wanted to kiss you on your hardest days. I wanted to kiss you even when we weren’t together all those years. You are… God you are perfect, and I really, really, really want to kiss you.’ 

‘Then kiss me.’

Taron let his free hand find purchase at her waist as he watched her intently. He watched the way her tongue wet her lips softly…slowly, taunting him in the best way; the way she blinked up at him innocently, her eyelashes fluttering against her cheeks; the way that her chest rose closer to his with each breath.

Her hands found their way to his waist where she held him tightly against her, unwilling to let him go now that she had him. 

Time stopped as his breath fanned over her lips and goosebumps rose across her legs. Her breathing was shaky as she took a peek at him. Words failed them both, but their looks spoke volumes. Taron’s eyes told her that she was safe and that he wouldn’t do anything she wasn’t comfortable with, while Liliana’s told Taron that she was all in. 

They looked at each other through wet eyelashes, their cheeks stained from fallen tears, and their hearts were both full and heavy from their own confessions. Liliana, for the first time in her life, didn’t want to run away from love. 

All the feelings she’d had when previous boyfriends had told her they loved her weren’t there. She didn’t want to pack a bag and leave in the middle of the night like she’d done before, sending nothing but a text in her wake. She wanted to run into it with open arms and embrace all things that come with being happily in love. 

Liliana had known Taron for as long as she could remember. He was the person who was with her when her parents split up and she lost the ability to believe in love. He was the person who dropped everything to be with her. He was who she wanted. 

Taron loved Liliana in a way that she knew if something was wrong or he fell out of love with her, he would tell her instead of sleeping with somebody else. She could trust him with every fibre in her being and it made falling for him that much easier. 

Liliana whimpered softly as Taron leaned down a little more. Their lips were so close that it would take one swift movement for them to be pressed together fully. Taron let his breath fan over Liliana’s top lips before he pressed against them so softly they could barely feel it. It was a tickle of a kiss, but a tickle that had a zap run the length of Liliana’s back.  

She leaned her head up the extra millimetre to allow her lips to press against Taron’s completely. In less than a second, her entire body relaxed and she sighed into him. Her eyes closed as she breathed him in. His lips were soft and she wondered why they’d never kissed before. It was magical, and all that other fairytale stuff that she’d stopped believing in years before. 

It was the right kiss. 

Taron pulled her into his body even more so that their chests were flush for a second. He pecked her lips three times before pulling away. Liliana’s eyes stayed closed for a little while, taking in the moment and committing it to memory to relive whenever she needed to. 

As her eyes blinked open and she looked at him, her lips pulled into a shy smile. Taron rubbed his nose against Liliana’s before pressing one last peck to her lips. He couldn’t get enough of her. The way she looked at him took his breath away, and he had to plant his feet firmly on the ground to stop himself from swaying. 

‘God, Lil,’ he breathed. ‘You are so…I’m so…Jesus, you’ve literally rendered me speechless.’ 

A blush rose to Liliana’s cheeks as she peered up at him, her lips pulling back to his. ‘Kiss me again,’ she just about managed to mumble. ‘Please.’ 

Taron cupped Liliana’s cheeks and planted his lips over hers completely. They slotted together perfectly, and as he traced her lower lips with his tongue, begging silently to give her more, she sighed into him happily and granted him the thing he wanted as though it was the only thing she wanted to do ever again. 

His tongue explored her mouth the same that hers did his, and Liliana let out a soft, almost inaudible moan when Taron nibbled on her lower lip slightly. Liliana’s hands grabbed whatever part of Taron she could just to try and remain upright. She gripped his waist, the hem of his t-shirt, his biceps, his cheeks, his neck, his hair, and everywhere else that she physically could. 

It was an impossible task for both of them to try and find just one place to keep their hands. They played Twister around one another’s body trying so desperately to find purchase for their hands. 

The kiss was passionate, sweet but messy as they almost knocked teeth a couple of times. They needed so badly to show one another how much they meant every word that had been shared between them that evening. 

Taron wanted to show Liliana that he was going to be there for her through everything, that he wanted her through better or for worse. Liliana wanted to show Taron that she trusted him wholly. That she wanted to surrender her heart to him because she truly believed that he would be the person to look after it, and her. 

They poured two decades worth of feelings into one kiss and they were lost in it. They wanted to stay there forever, in the moment that changed the entire trajectory of their lives. Where they’d both admitted their deepest secrets to one another and were met with nothing but requited love. 

Neither of them wanted to be the first to pull away from the kiss, even when they were struggling for breath. Taron, when he physically couldn’t breathe any longer, pulled away first, just enough that they could breathe easily but where they were still tangled together. He looked down at Liliana as her chest heaved while trying to catch her breath, and she mirrored the smile on his face. 

His hands, which had finally settled on the small of her back, rubbed Liliana’s skin softly as he looked at her, so in love that he couldn’t help but just stare at her. Liliana toyed with the material of his t-shirt, something she had come to realise calmed her and helped her to stay grounded and not float into the atmosphere. 

She looked at him with a gentle smile as she stepped onto her tiptoes to press one last peck to his lips. ‘I know you said that we could take this at my pace, and I appreciate you for that more than I will ever be able to put into words, but right now all I can think about is taking you to my bedroom and showing you just how much I love you.’ 

Liliana could see Taron’s breath hitch as he looked at her with wide eyes. He blinked at her rapidly as he licked his lips and took a deep, shaky breath. Liliana’s eyes never left his and she didn’t show an ounce of hesitation, something that Taron hadn’t quite been prepared for. 

‘Lil, I meant what I said. I’m happy to just take things slow so that you feel comfortable. I don’t want to push you into something that you might not be ready for. Please don’t be suggesting this for me, because as much as I would love to do that too, I am genuinely so prepared to wait as long as it takes, years, if that’s what you need. Forever and a day, as long as you are ready. I know how hard it is for you to open up and I don’t want you to go too far too fast and then regret it. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.’ 

‘Taron,’ she said as she cupped his cheek. She could feel the beginnings of stubble tickle her skin and she smiled to herself. ‘I want to. I want to show you how much I love you. How much I trust you. I want you to show me how much you love me. Please? If you have reservations then that’s totally fine but I’m ready if you are.’ 

Taron licked his lips with a small, knowing grin that inched into a smirk as he held Liliana’s waist tightly. ‘Take me to your bedroom, Lil.’ 

***

The second they got to Liliana’s bedroom, her nerves barrelled to the surface. Taron, able to read Liliana with just one look, could tell that she was nervous so kept his movements slow and light, giving Liliana the space to step away if she needed to. He could tell that Liliana was holding back from him.

‘Lil, we really don’t have to, you know.’ 

‘No, it’s not that I don’t want to. I really do. I’m just…scared? I guess. This is a big deal and I’m a little bit nervous, which seems so silly at my age but you’re you and you’re perfect and I’m-’ 

‘Perfect,’ Taron finished for her. He kissed her lips and she turned to putty in his arms. He chuckled at her and guided her hands to his t-shirt so that she could be the one to take it off, when she was ready. ‘One step at a time, yeah? We can stop whenever. It doesn’t bother me. Even if we’re in the throes.’ 

 Liliana burst into a fit of giggles and let the hem of his t-shirt go so that she could balance herself against him. ‘Never, and I mean never, say ‘in the throes’ again. I’m begging,’ she laughed loudly. Taron laughed with her while nuzzling his nose into the top of her head. ‘I love you.’ 

The words came so effortlessly that they made Liliana stop for a second. She looked at Taron, who was already smiling down at her. Liliana was calm. She felt safe and steady rather than full of butterflies like she was used to. 

‘I love you,’ she repeated, the corners of her lips twitching up into a smile, her eyes sparkling. Taron looked at her with the same glint in his eyes. ‘I love you. I love you. I love you.’ 

‘I love you too, Lil. So fucking much. You have no idea.’ 

‘I think I do.’ 

Liliana grabbed the hem of Taron’s t-shirt once again and tugged it up over his body, throwing it to the bedroom floor before she pressed her lips back to Taron’s. She wouldn’t ever forget how perfect he was, or how right it felt to kiss him again and again, as though she’d never gone a day without kissing him before. 

Every kiss she’d had before Taron felt obligatory and as though it was just what was expected of her. And at the time, it felt right, and she’d liked it. But kissing Taron, and knowing that kissing someone could feel like absolutely everything, she knew that no other kiss had ever meant anything before. 

Running her hands over his abdomen, Liliana took a sharp intake of breath. After so many years of only being able to look, it was nice to be able to feel him. His stomach was soft and squeezable in areas but there were harder areas where his abs were starting to protrude against his skin. Liliana traced each one with a featherlight touch and he squirmed away from her. 

‘You’re ticklish?’ She giggled into his mouth, running her finger over his abdomen again to get the same reaction from him. ‘Oh my god, you are ticklish! How did I not know this? Have you always been ticklish?’ 

‘It’s mean to do that,’ he pouted against her when she did it a third time. 

Liliana caught his lip in her mouth and moaned into him when he held her firmly by the bum to crash her body into his once more. Their hips pressed together and Liliana could make out the hardness of him through his jeans. 

‘Can I take your top off?’ Taron asked sceptically, pulling a kiss from her lips before holding back to look at her fully. ‘You know, seeing as though you were mean and tickled me.’ 

Liliana nodded with one last giggle that turned into a gasp when Taron’s fingers trailed across the waistband of her shorts. He smirked to himself as he held his palms flat against her skin to push the clothing up her body while also tracing her skin at the same time. 

Her skin was soft under his slightly calloused hands and Liliana’s eyes closed at the feel of him. When he reached her breasts he paused. After her shower, Liliana hadn’t bothered to put a bra on, and Taron could tell that her nipples were getting hard from the friction of his hands and the anticipation of what was coming. 

‘Do you not have a bra on?’ He asked, though he already knew the answer. 

Liliana squirmed when he pulled her top off fully and eyed her breasts. He swallowed thickly, and even with the serious look, Liliana could still see the boyish glint in his eyes. ‘They’re uncomfortable so I just didn’t put one on after the shower.’ 

‘God, you are so beautiful,’ Taron whispered. 

With his hands on her shoulders, slowly massaging the muscles so well that her head started to fall forward, he pushed her away from him just enough that he could look at her properly. He wanted to take her in for the first time. 

He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and swallowed thickly. Liliana saw the shift in his eyes. His pupils grew three times their normal size, hiding most of the green of his irises. When he let his lip go, she ran the pad of her thumb over it softly. Taron kissed it lightly. He continued to look at her bare for him, hardly able to believe that they were there. 

Liliana started to grow conscious of how bare she was and started to overthink how she looked so she lifted her hands to try to cover herself. Taron looked at her in disbelief and took her wrists in his hands to stop her from hiding. 

‘I don’t think so,’ he mumbled. He looked deeply into her eyes and leaned forward to suck another kiss from her already swollen lips. Liliana melted into him and let her arms go limp, no longer bothered about hiding herself from him. 

Taron, now knowing what it was like to kiss her, and to have her kiss him back with the same amount of passion and longing, never wanted to stop feeling that feeling. He wanted to feel that every day for the rest of his life. He’d waited every day for half of his life. 

‘You don’t ever have to hide your body from me, okay?’ He said while trailing his fingers up the length of her arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake. ‘But if you feel like you want to stop then-’ 

Liliana crashed her lips to Taron’s to shut him up and pressed her front into him entirely. She could feel the firmness of his chest against her breaths. Taron stumbled back a tiny bit before he regained his balance and pulled her into him, lifting her feet off the ground as he did. 

When Liliana pulled away for air, Taron held her hand and spun her around once so that he could look at her fully. A blush rose to her cheeks but Taron whistled to himself. ‘You are perfect.’ 

He leaned in to peck her lips before he cupped her cheeks with his hands. ‘Absolutely perfect.’ 

His last admission was more for himself than Liliana, but she appreciated it nonetheless. Taron reattached their lips in a passionate kiss as he walked Liliana back slowly until the back of her knees hit the soft duvet of her bed. Liliana could feel her heart rate increase as Taron pushed her down slightly so she had no choice but to sit on the edge of her bed. 

She looked up at him and could so clearly see the hunger in his eyes that she grew wet with anticipation. After wetting her lips, which were swollen and three shades darker than normal, she gulped as Taron leaned down to plant more kisses to her lips. When he moved to kiss her neck, Liliana’s eyes fell closed. 

Taron’s lips erupted every single nerve ending underneath her skin and ignited them all in a frenzy of fireworks that made the blood rush to her core. Liliana could feel the trail of his kisses long after his lips had moved to caress another part of her skin, and she relished in the pleasure he gave her. 

He kept leaning forward until Liliana was laying on the bed, her legs dangling awkwardly over the edge. When he pulled away, Liliana scooted back up the bed to give Taron more space to get comfortable. She nervously pushed her shorts and underwear down her legs as she went, leaving herself completely exposed and vulnerable to Taron. Though she was safe in the knowledge that he loved her and that he would take care of her. 

Taron stripped his joggers and his own underwear before he joined her on the bed. Liliana tried to avert her eyes up to Taron’s face, but she caught a glimpse of all of him. She took note of how substantial he was and she felt her breath catch in her throat. He was more beautiful than she could ever have imagined and she felt so lucky that she got to see him like that, and that she got to share herself with him in such a way. 

A blush rose to her cheeks at the sight of him, but if Taron noticed he didn’t say anything. Instead he leaned down to plant more kisses to her bare skin, as though he didn’t want to leave a single part of her untouched by his lips. He was alive with passion and couldn’t help but land a small kiss to the swell of her breast on the way back to her lips. 

Liliana moaned at the contact, and saw Taron smirk to himself as he kissed her lips once again. He reached down to rest one hand on the outside of her thigh, and she inhaled sharply at his fingers dancing against her. She could feel herself getting more aroused but Taron didn’t move his hand.

He moved his lips to her neck, sucking gentle kisses and nipping at her skin with such a gentle pressure that she pressed her thighs together for any semblance of friction. She needed more so she guided Taron’s hand to her centre where he felt just how wet she was. 

Taron’s throat bobbed as he moved to look at her, the desire so evident in her eyes that he knew she wouldn’t change her mind. She wanted him just as much as he wanted her. It was all he’d ever wanted. Liliana wordlessly took a hold of Taron and stroked him, sending a shiver down his back. 

His head fell into her shoulder where he kissed up her neck, over her ear and cheek and back down to her lips. His hips bucked into her hand as his fingers lifted her arousal from her entrance to her clit. He rubbed soft circles against her and Liliana moaned above him, arching her back off the bed. 

Taron kissed her before pulling away and moving her hand from his length. ‘As much as I love that, I’m going to need you to stop. Because if you don’t, I’m going to finish right here and that’s not how I want tonight to go.’

Liliana blushed a little and nodded with a nervous smile. ‘There’s a condom in the nightstand drawer.’ 

‘Expecting this, were you?’ Taron teased as he leaned over her to open the drawer and get the condom. 

‘As much as I’ve always hoped this would happen, not quite. Now isn’t the time for the story about why I have condoms in my bedside table though. I’ll tell you another time.’ 

Taron closed the drawer and ripped the foil packet open with his teeth. He rolled it onto himself and Liliana watched, licking her lips and reaching out to touch his torso. 

‘You’re so perfect,’ she told him, using his own words against him. He blushed softly as he leaned down to hover over her again. His breath caught in his throat as what was about to happen truly set in. 

Liliana cupped his cheeks and pressed their foreheads together. The simplicity of the move was slow and intimate, and they lay like that for a little while, looking at one another and taking everything in. It was more than either of them could have ever imagined and they didn’t want to take it for granted. 

Taron lined himself up at Liliana’s entrance when she nodded at him, and she breathed deeply. ‘Are you sure you want to do this?’ 

Liliana nodded at him. ‘I need to hear you say it. I need to hear you tell me that this is what you want, please.’ 

Taron’s voice caught in his throat on his last word, and Liliana ran her thumb over his lips as she took another deep breath, not trusting her voice to give in the same way Taron’s had. 

‘I want you, Taron,’ she managed to croak out. ‘I’ve wanted you for so long. Long before the book launch. Long before I left for Edinburgh. I cannot think of a time where I haven’t wanted you. Tonight is no different. I want this. So badly.’ 

They stare at one another as Taron pressed himself into Liliana, their lips parted at the feel of finally being connected in a way they’d never connected before. He pulled out a tiny bit before pushing in further with a little more momentum. 

Liliana’s legs wrapped around his waist and her arms wrapped around his neck as he kissed her, continuing to press into her. His movements were slow and intense, and they looked at one another deeply, communicating without words. Liliana’s moans filled the small room, but Taron swallowed them as though they were his favourite meal. 

A decade’s worth of emotion was being poured onto them as they lay connected on Liliana’s bed, and as Taron looked at her and she told him that she loved him again, tears forced their way down his cheeks. Liliana immediately wiped them away as his movements halted. 

‘I’m sorry,’ he sniffled against her, his forehead pressed against hers and his chest lowered even more over her. His weight on top of her was all she ever wanted to feel again. ‘I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you before. I’m sorry that I didn’t text you when you went to Edinburgh. You said you needed to do it on your own and,’ he paused as a hiccup erupted from him. Liliana continued to wipe tears away as tears of her own started to trickle down her cheeks. 

‘I thought I was doing the right thing by leaving you be. But I shouldn’t have. I should have followed you to Scotland and made sure that you were okay. I should have followed you. I am so sorry, Lil.’ 

Liliana wiped more tears away from his cheeks and pressed her lips to his once, so softly he could have imagined it. She sniffled as Taron hiccuped again. 

‘Please don’t ever apologise for that,’ she begged. ‘I asked you not to follow me and I still think that it was for the best. It’s made getting to know you again so much more special and I don’t take a single day with you for granted anymore. Because I know how precious time with you is, and I don’t ever want to forget that. Being away from you made me realise how much I love you, Taron. How much I’ve always loved you.

‘I think I’ve loved you forever but I’ve been too scared to let myself open up to those feelings. You were there for me when nobody else was. I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to thank you enough for that.’ 

Taron kissed Liliana and thrust into her again slowly. A moan escaped her as her eyes rolled back a little. 

‘And besides,’ she continued through pleasure, ‘if you had followed me to Edinburgh, you’d never have gone to RADA and become this big shot, award winning movie star!’ 

Taron let out a chuckle as he thrust into her again, silently begging for her to come undone beneath him. 

‘Everything that happened led us to this very moment and I wouldn’t change a thing. Because this right here, what we’re doing now, connecting this way, it’s shifted something inside me that I can’t describe. I just know that I love you so much and this feels right. It feels so right, and so, so good.’ 

Taron kissed her deeply and sped up his movements, unable to form the words to converse with her. Liliana understood. She’d gone from not sharing any of her feelings to exploding all over him and he was a little overwhelmed. 

Liliana moved her hips in time with Taron’s and watched in amazement as his eyes rolled into the back of his head when she pushed her feet into his bum and pushed him to the hilt. 

‘God, fuck, Lil. Y’feel so good.’ 

He thrust into her over and over until he came undone above her, his damp forehead falling to her chest as he rode out his high. Liliana traced her fingers up and down the length of his back as she rocked with him. When he looked up at her and saw her smiling down at him, a warmth to her eyes he hadn’t seen before, he couldn’t help but kiss her lips. 

‘I love you,’ he said as he looked into her eyes. ‘Everything you said, it’s, this feels so right.’ 

‘Because it is right,’ Liliana responded. ‘This between us is special, and time is fleeting. I wish I could say I regret that we didn’t keep in touch but I’m not sure that we’d be where we are if we had. I missed you like crazy and there were days where I’d cry from the moment I woke up because I felt like I’d lost the best thing that had ever happened to me. But I think we would have been stuck in a rut if we’d spoken.’ 

‘How do you mean?’ Taron asked as he pulled out of Liliana, a realisation hitting him in the face. ‘Hold up, you didn’t finish.’ 

Liliana smiled up at him in a daze and brushed his hair away from his forehead before she kissed the tip of his nose. ‘I’m very satisfied, I promise.’ 

‘Yeah but-’ 

‘Taron, come cuddle me. Please? That’s all I want right now. I didn’t need to orgasm.’ 

‘Ew, you said orgasm,’ Taron teased with a huge grin. 

Liliana shoved him away with a guffaw, no longer caring that she was completely naked. Taron pulled the condom away and disposed of it in the bin in the bedroom while Liliana watched. 

‘Take a picture, it lasts longer.’ 

‘Oh my god,’ she laughed. ‘Do you always ruin a tender moment by being such a boy?’ 

‘Only with you. Because I love you. And you love me. You do still love me, right? I haven’t just given you the worst sex of your life have I? Oh god.’ 

Liliana grabbed Taron’s wrist and pulled him down onto the bed with her, kissing him deeply and wrapping her arms around him. 

‘I still love you. Nothing would make me fall out of love with you.’ 

Taron wrapped his arms around Liliana and held her close to his body, trailing kisses over her cheeks as she sighed happily. ‘And the sex? It wasn’t awful?’ 

‘God no,’ she breathed. ‘In fact, it was the best sex I’ve ever had.’ 

Liliana snuggled deeper into Taron’s chest as he pulled her in closer to him. She could feel the weight of her jet lag and lack of sleep finally hitting her. Her eyes felt heavy and she knew she would be asleep in minutes.

Before drifting off, she looked up and saw that Taron’s eyes were closed as well and he was already starting to snore lightly. 

Liliana planted a soft kiss on Taron’s chest and whispered ‘Goodnight T, I love you,’ against his skin, her fingers drawing delicate patterns against him.

He wasn’t completely asleep as Liliana had assumed, and he responded to her by gently kissing the top of her head. 

‘Sleep well. I love you more.’ 

March 7th, 2022 

Liliana was already two glasses of wine in by the time Evelyn arrived and buzzed the intercom to be let in. After a morning tangled in bed with Taron before he left for the theatre to rehearse, a mess of limbs playing a game of Twister on their own and lips locked over giggles and whispers of love, Liliana had poured a large glass of wine and sank into the bathtub to ease the soreness in her muscles. 

She only got out of the bath when the water was cool against her skin and Evelyn texted to see if she was up for a girls’ night, complete with face masks and a takeaway. Liliana had jumped at the offer, desperate to tell her best friend all about the night, and morning, she’d had with Taron. She poured herself another glass of wine and grabbed some clothes from her comfy drawer to wear for the evening. 

Evelyn, living up to the legend, arrived laden with more wine, her gel nail polish kit, and face masks. She took one look at Liliana and the smile crept onto her mouth quickly. ‘Go put the record on, I’ll pour the wine, then you will tell me everything that has happened since Christmas!’ 

‘I’ve seen you everyday for two months at this point, how is Christmas only just coming up?’ Liliana chuckled as she put a record on. ‘I swear we’ve spoken about this before, anyway.’ 

‘Not to the extent that we need to talk about it,’ Evelyn called from the kitchen. ‘Plus, that shit-eating grin you gave me when I walked through the door tells me that there are new things to tell so you’re going to spill it all.’ 

Liliana shook her head. Evelyn walked back through the living room and handed the glass of wine over. It was bigger than the two glasses she’d poured for herself and Liliana knew that she would be a little more than tipsy by the time she rolled into bed that night. 

Evelyn hopped onto the sofa and crossed her legs before she leaned forward eagerly and motioned for Liliana to spill everything she needed to spill. ‘Come on, out with it.’ 

‘What do you want to know?’ 

‘I want to know what happened on Christmas Eve. One minute you’re texting me to tell me that you’d had a shit evening with your mum, and then the next it’s Christmas Eve and Taron is reading a story to Matilda before bed? You left me hanging, girl!’ 

‘I’m sorry,’ Liliana said softly after she’d taken her seat next to Evelyn. She’d grabbed a bowl for the popcorn Evelyn had brought over and poured the sweet treat into it so they could snack. ‘Those few days were an emotional rollercoaster that I’ve tried so hard to forget. He came over on Christmas Eve to try to diffuse the tension between mum and me because it was bad, Ev. I’d not been home an hour before she started.’ 

‘Oh, Lili, we don’t have to talk about this if it’s too much.’ Evelyn put her hand on Liliana’s knee to comfort her and Liliana smiled sadly at her. ‘We don’t talk about your mum much and I can see that it’s already getting to you.’ 

‘No, it’s fine. He came over, Matilda loved him which I knew she would. Then Taron asked if Tilly had seen a film and she hadn’t so we watched that while mum and Hudson went out for the night. He stayed and read ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas and then he went home. I thought there was a moment where he was going to kiss me but he didn’t. I wish he’d kissed me then,’ she admitted before gulping down a large mouthful of wine. ‘I would have let him. He came the next day and I’d been having a shit morning. He bought me the most perfect present ever.’ 

Liliana untucked the necklace from her t-shirt to show Evelyn, and Evelyn raised her eyebrows in a knowing way. 

‘A necklace? The man’s got it bad, Lils. Did he kiss you then? Please tell me he kissed you!’

Liliana shook her head, a smile so small it could be seen as a twitch, flashing over her lips. ‘No, he didn’t. But like I said, I’d had the worst Christmas morning with my mum and I think he could just tell.’ 

Evelyn nodded but kept quiet while Liliana took a deep breath before she downed more of her drink. Her conversation with her mum that morning still ate at her and made her get emotional even though it wasn’t that big of a surprise to her when it happened. 

‘I could tell that he wanted to say something,’ she continued after a short pause, ‘but he knew it wasn’t the right time. I came home before I could see him again and say anything he wanted to. And we never mentioned it again until New York.’ 

As if cued up perfectly, Ever Since New York started playing on the record player, and Liliana chuckled softly. Evelyn could clearly see the pinkish blush that made its way to her best friend’s cheeks. 

‘You’re holding out on me, Lils. There’s something you aren’t telling me and it’s killing me, as your best friend, not knowing what you are thinking. This is the first time I haven’t been able to read your mind and I need you to tell me everything! What has happened since the book tour? The last I knew, you were sad after we left New York and you sulked the rest of the trip.’ 

Liliana took another large gulp of wine, finishing her glass completely. She poured herself and Evelyn another glass and looked through the nail colours to decide what she would get done. She wondered how Taron’s rehearsal had gone and wanted to text him, but it was her time with Evelyn. She would have to text him when she had five minutes to herself when Evelyn left. 

‘The day he surprised me in New York, thank you, by the way, for not telling me that he would be there.’ Evelyn winked with a smile. ‘We went back to the hotel after our day out and-’ 

‘Oh my god, you slept with him!’ 

‘No.’ Liliana crushed Evelyn’s dreams with one single word. ‘I told him about why I left Aber for uni, and why I struggle to go back. I opened up to him for the first time ever and it was both the most freeing and the most suffocating thing I’ve done. I’ve wanted to tell him everything for years but having him look at me with those sad, sympathetic eyes made me want to take it all back and bottle it back up. Then he tried to kiss me.’ 

Liliana bit her bottom lip hard, leaving teeth marks in the plush skin. The pain distracted her from the tears that threatened to spill. She hadn’t told Evelyn the whole truth about New York. 

‘Lili…’ 

‘I ran out of his room,’ Liliana said as she wiped under her eyes and stood up to change the record. ‘I went back to my room, I lay in bed all night barely getting any sleep and then I got radio silence from him for the rest of the trip. Until he picked me up from the airport yesterday.’ 

‘You’re welcome for that,’ Evelyn said. ‘He texted me and asked for our flight details but he wouldn’t tell me why he needed them. I gathered he wanted to do something special so I gave them to him. What happened after you both dropped Jacob and me off?’ 

Taron had insisted that they drive Evelyn and Jacob back to their flats as it was getting late and they each had a large suitcase. He drove to three parts of the city to drop them all off and they’d thanked him profusely. Though Taron, being the gentleman that he was, told them that it wasn’t a bother and that he hoped to see them again soon. 

Liliana had spent most of the drive listening to her three best friends getting to know one another and chatting about work while she sat quietly. When it was just the two of them, Taron gushed about Evelyn and Jacob, expressing how much he liked them and how he could see why Liliana loved them so much. She wanted to ask him about New York but she didn’t. Not then. 

‘We got back here and he brought my suitcase up for me. I asked if he could stay for a bit so we could talk and he agreed. I had a shower and he made a cuppa.’ 

‘Liliana, you’re making this sound so boring, I want juicy details,’ Evelyn chuckled. 

Liliana brushed her off with a playful scowl. ‘I brought New York up and he apologised, then I apologised. He then confessed that he is in love with me, always has been.’ 

Evelyn’s eyes grew wide and her mouth hung open. ‘Oh my god, Lili!’ 

‘Turns out, I feel the same way about him. We kissed right in the doorway to the kitchen, the cups of tea going cold by the second. I was freshly out of the shower, wet hair, no makeup, a pair of cycling shorts and a t-shirt but right then I felt like a million bucks. He made me feel that way just by one kiss. One thing led to another and…’ 

The second the cogs started to turn in Evelyn’s head, her eyes bulged from their sockets and she shifted position so that she was on her knees. 

Liliana’s cheeks were beetroot red by that point and were warm to the touch. But all she could feel was the burning in them from where she’d smiled so widely at Evelyn, who was so excited for her. 

She practically bounced up and down on the sofa and Liliana shook her head with a laugh. Evelyn was happy that Liliana had met someone and let some steam off. She’d been telling her for months that she needed to get laid, which is why she’d bought a box of condoms for her. 

It was even better that she’d found someone who looked at her like she hung the moon. Like she was the most expensive piece of art in the museum. Like she was everything they’d ever wanted, and all they would ever need. 

‘Lili, I am so happy for you. This is huge. How was it? Did he make you come? How many times? Was there a starter or was this a dessert first kinda meal? If there was a starter, was it reciprocated? I need details, woman!’ 

‘Evelyn!’ Liliana guffawed. ‘A lady doesn’t kiss and tell.’ 

‘You are no lady, Liliana Esme,’ Evelyn smirked. ‘You are a wild beast and I know you enjoy sharing details with me.’ 

‘You are absolutely unbelievable. There was dessert. The best dessert I’ve ever had, honestly. When he realised that I hadn’t finished, he tried multiple times to go back for starter, but all I wanted to do was snuggle and fall asleep in his arms. I was so satisfied that the fact I hadn’t finished didn’t bother me in the slightest.’ 

‘Wait, wait, so he came, but you didn’t?’ Evelyn asked, dumbfounded. 

Liliana nodded. ‘Yes, but like I said, I felt so satisfied that it didn’t matter. And he more than made up for it this morning.’ 

‘So you had sex, you didn’t finish but you snuggled until you went to sleep? Do you know how cheesy that sounds?’ Evelyn asked playfully. 

‘I do,’ Liliana responded with a small nod. ‘But there’s something about Taron that I just can’t get my head around. It’s like, I’m so safe around him, and that moment after sex, when we were in bed together just tangled up in one another, my head on his chest and his arms wrapped around me, I felt so safe. The safest I’ve felt in a long time. And I felt so loved, which after recent events was nice.’ 

‘You’re so in love. I love it! Wait, you said he made up for it this morning?’ Liliana nodded as she smiled at the memory of the previous night and that morning. Evelyn nudged her with a gasp. ‘What time did he leave the flat? Is he still here hiding in your bedroom?’ 

Liliana blushed. ‘He left a couple of hours before you got here. It’s been a…fun day.'

‘Yes girl, you get some! Ugh I feel like a proud big sister. Is he coming back here tonight? Are you waiting for me to leave so he can come back and rock your world in the bedroom?’ 

‘Evelyn!’ Liliana knew not to expect any less from her best friend, and secretly she loved how happy Evelyn was for her. ‘He’s at the theatre until late so we’re going to play it by ear. But he did suggest he goes home and you stay here for the night so you aren’t travelling back to your flat while you’re drunk and on your own in the dark. So I guess it’s up to you. If you want to stay the night, which I would love, then he’ll go home but if you wanted to go home, which is also okay, then chances are he’ll come here.’ 

Evelyn shook her head with a knowing grin. ‘I’ll go home. You get yourself laid…again.’ 

‘I still can’t believe he wants me after all these years,’ Liliana confessed at the end of her wine, tilting the glass up to get every last drop of the sweet white wine. 

They were officially out of alcohol and they had only been together for a little over an hour. Liliana debated ordering more online but thought better of it. She wanted to be coherent the next day at work. They were both happily merry, Liliana bordering on drunk but not quite there. 

‘Lili,’ Evelyn sighed in exasperation. Or maybe it wasn’t exasperation. Liliana couldn’t quite tell. ‘When are you going to realise that you are the total package and he’s been in love with you since you were teenagers? You were both just too stubborn to say anything. When he texted me about coming to New York, it was so obvious, but he made me promise not to say anything to you. And then the whole surprise at the airport and a necklace at Christmas? I wish I had a man pining after me to this extent!’ 

Liliana held the pendant of her necklace between her thumb and finger as she thought back to all of the times he’d looked like he wanted to tell her something, how she’d wondered if he was about to lean forward and kiss her. She realised that all of the time she had been pining about him behind closed doors, wishing that he would kiss her, he was trying to stop himself from doing it in case she didn’t want that. 

‘I’m just so happy that I have a chance to make up for lost time. I really love him, Ev. I’ve never loved anybody like this before and it’s so fucking scary.’ 

‘I can see how much you do,’ Evelyn smiled, finally pulling Liliana in for a hug. ‘I’m so happy for you both. You deserve all of this happiness after all of the dark days. I’ll have to nail down someone so we can double date!’ 

‘I’ll see what I can do for you. Maybe Taron has some single actor friends!’ 

‘That would a dream. Don’t forget…Richard Madden.’ 

For the rest of the evening, Evelyn and Liliana talked about work, the book tour, Harry Styles, and what Liliana’s plans were for the second book. They painted one another’s nails, Liliana opting for a pale lilac and Evelyn going for a bright yellow, two perfectly opposite best friends. 

Liliana and Taron texted multiple times, and when Liliana asked if he would stay the night because Evelyn was going home, he jumped at the opportunity and told her that he would drop Evelyn off at home so she didn’t have to take public transport. She would just have to wait until he was finished at the theatre.