dreamt i was straight chillin with justin bieber. i asked him if he could get me front row seats and he said nah it's too expensive..like 1800 dollars. i said fine. we were sitting in rows of chairs in front of a screen and people were sitting behind us and a tiny tiny bus drove over their heads slowly. then something about stacking pallets.then i bumped into jane lynch on the way out of a store and told her she was beautiful. she said no you are. i said no you are winning and famous. she said nope you win you're hot and have hot parents. then i went into the place she was and Misha D. Fisher was there and i told him i met jane lynch and he yelled at me for being too star struck to tell him ♥  then i was so hungry i found kefir ranch salad dressing in a fridge FULL of random ranch dressings. earlier i kept seeing fridges full of all types of beers. i was in a mall in a foreign country. i was walking around with no shirt on but just underwear and panty hose. in this city no one cared.
Giambeanomelatonin= crazy ass dreams. btw.
i dreamt that i was in a basement apartment with no windows, but it was actually a ship, out at sea in a bad storm. and i got lost at sea,and everyone was sad that i wasn't going to make it back. except the entire ocean was one big olympic sized swimming pool, and the ship was just really small so i jumped out and swam to the edge and the pool was in this mansion and the basement of the mansion i had been wandering around was the basement i started out in., that connected to tj's and then i was in the grocery aisle at work the entire time.. wtf?!?!?! please interpret.
April 7
dreamt i went on a double date to mexico but i was pissed because it looked just like egypt. hookah bars and arabic signs everywhere. there was some kind of rock avalanche going on so i ran from it. then earthquakes started happened and my mind made me think an earthquake is when your body gets crushed into the earth because of electromagnetic activity.so i laid my body on the ground hoping to not get crushed but small cracks in the earth appeared under my body. intense vibrations came from the floor. then of course some coworkers appeared out of nowhere creeping up on me. it was raining and i needed batteries for my camera. a friend told me she didn't have any and opened her bag to show us. i could see them and i knew she was lying. i suddenly realized i have my own brain lie detector and i could tell when anyone was lying.
April 12Â
dreamt i had a farm with tons of food and tons of animals in my backyard. the foxes were coming and i knew we had to negotiate a deal with them so they wouldn't eat my sheep and goat. i set aside 20 dozens of eggs so that when they come to prowl i could have something for them. the foxes held me at gunpoint until i had the food for them. the trade was made and no one was hurt. then there was a show in my barnyard. and i had a projector set up that displayed a giant google page. i looked up the word "GRUCE" and matt came up under the pictures. i thought this was so funny since GRUCE isn't even a word. in my mind it was the stem of the word gruesome. pretty sure this means im retarded.
April 13
dreamt it was my birthday and i went to the gym to workout..they had polar bears and crazy dance. i went home to change and veryone was coming oer fot my birthday party snday ar 6pm. people brouhght me trader joes bread as gifts and i was so excited. everyone came except a couple of guys at work who i was on the phone with. they told me i was too stupid and weird to hang out with so i got sad and tried to chane their minds. \the partty was a little insane and people started to leave because i wasnt paying any attention to them but i was paying attention to random tranny hookers outside my window dancing for me with feathered boas. for some reason i had to go to the doctor after the party. i sat in the office and waited to be seen by the doctor. i saw some stuff that looked like lotion on the desk in the patient rooms so i put some on my pointer finger and rubbed a tiny bit on my nose..then RIGHT after i did this i knew something was absolutely wrong.. i realized id never read the container/ingredients. i checked back at the huge container and the substance i put on my skin was poison + lye . not sure anyone has ever seen me flip out like this. i take all the doctors alcohol pads and every cleaner they have and start screaming to all the nurses that i put poison on my face and i don't know what to do!! i read the container again to see what exactly i've done. it says nothing about calling the poison control center- it just says avoid all contact with anything or you will die. at this point i started screaming at the top of my lungs but no sound is coming out at all. just hot air and gasping whispers.my finger starts turning blue where the lotion touched me and im desperately cleaning the areas over and over and the nurses are helping me and im screaming to call the doctors but they don't even know what to do. at this point i check on my nose to see if its ok..its fine but under my eyes and my forehead and starting to turn blue! dark dark pen ink blue.i feel like im dying my heart is starting to beat slower and slower even though im screaming harder and harder. then i said WTF this is a dream! and woke myself up. UGH NIGHTMARE.
April 16
dreamt about another tsunami but it hit florida and i was there for the whole thing. i was on the beach collecting objects that weren't mine. most of the objects were medicine balls. then i went to my hotel room to find that my clothes were all in the wash covered in ice cream. then i went to a small house where they did tattoos and my friend was there smokin pot. i let the dog out and it had a giant bow tie on.then back at the hotel which nicole richie was the manager at- she was giving out giant vases of intricately embroidered flowers. she said if i rented one of their cars that i could get this and a box of chocolates.
April 17
 Losing shit, sweet jasmine puffs, beirut,deathcab& damien rice, hula hooping, bubbles, glowing balls, string puppets doing inappropriate things, jimi hendrix replicas- ahem. ♥April 20
dreamt i was going through the set of the virgin suicides and they had awesome beds made of leather and a night stand with voltaire and an artist book who used mostly yellows and specks of red. it was halloween and i needed matt to drive me to work beccause i was really late. i was screaming at him and he was wearing a white suit. i stole his car.on halloween we had fireworks like the fourth of july and no one was cold. rocket ships were taking off into space that day and i decided to stay and watch the spaceships take off and be late for work. 4 spaceships went on a mission. it was snowing verrrry heavily then i went to trader joes and josh made me write the new lateness policy and i had to police the new policy.
April 24Â
dreamt i was on a deserted island which was actually in virginia but it had no contact with the outside world. bodies of water kept changing to cement at random times. i cut an angel wings into paper and she flew away with her lover and left glitter all over me. i had to set off fireworks to get peoples attention but i detonated them at the wrong time and left firey holes that made my skin warm but not quite burnt.my mother drove to see me and she was like you can';t expect me to come here anymore. its too long of a drive. i said ma, we are actually in the south pacific. she wished me well and left.
April 28
dreamt about withstanding a tornado with my musclesApril 29
‎"I got one when i graduated from my mother's vagina" Jenny haha best thing ive ever heard!
dreamt i was midnight christmas shopping in africa with christine. the valet went to get my car and he somehow messed it up. then i was in kellenberg in the hallway next to the cafeteria near the window of the courtyard.
May 3Â
Jennifer SÂ I dreamt I started my new job and I was walking around the hospital..thats all I remember lolMay 3Â
dreamt i was ditching a lame party to drive around in a van full of boring hippies. they would take any words they sAW and turn them into some hippy BS.. like green beans.. they turned that into green liberation. one of them asked me why it was getting windy? but they said it like a burnout. i said oh its because weather patterns happen and the wind is coming from the north. there might be a storm coming.they responded. "oh ok"Â then my j's from work were talking to me about my hair and saying how they definitely think its going through some kind of weird phase right now. then i came in one day and they screamed omg your hair actually looks normal for once!
May 6
dreamt i was at a wig store and i tried on a wig. the workers happened to see and charged me 33.99 for it. i was so mad and didn't want to pay so me and a friend ran across the street to modells. she told me that this is what i had to do to avoid paying.. she made me hop a plane to mexico. on the plane i hung upside down on the seats and made friends with some weirdos. eventually when i arrived to mexico i hung out in shitty little towns. from afar we watched a few houses and some girl was driving her giant flaming truck all over the houses and up the stairs of them and into them. smashing and burning everything in her path and surviving every hit. she was this gothic creepy girl and loved violence. i said oh ok so this is what goes on in mexico. then of course i was packing groceries for a little bit and realized i was 15 mins late to work at tj's because my plane back was late. it was raining. i ran.May 7Â
Jennifer Si dreamt that me you and jenn were going to evans house but we needed to take the bridge we couldnt drive though we had to walk under it on the water but the water was a solid pavement and they called it something but i cant remember the name..it was hard bc we had to watch out for landmines and bumpy moving ground..we finally got across and were able to drive but we got pulled over by the cops...=/Â and i had clip in blonde hair extensions and i was giving pieces of them for people to braid.
dreamt that i didnt remember giving birth but i had a baby... all i remember is seeing it then next day and it was crusty and weird and hungry. i kept it in a box where it would sleep. then someone was taking over my house and i didn;t want them to know about my baby. i had to play supermario to break some code.  then the baby grew up in one month to be a tall asian guy. i said WTF is this? then my grandma stole bck my family heirloom garbage can. then i taught a class of tiny children. we went to the amusement park and they had all these weird rides where the adults could control them. so one right you could put your babys on some weird metal contraption and pull a rope and they would go up and down reallly really fast.  so after that i got the kids together for a game of kickball and the rest was too awkward to remmeber. something about alley ways and graffiti and tagging.
May 10
dreamt about horrible things like jealousy, cheating and denial but the coolest part was being dumped into these structures that were circular indents in a huge room. it projected lights and had a grid going through it. it was poisonous and when you touched the surface it made you see really crazy things.May 11
dreamr i was at the gym and they had new flying chairs that you could ride around in a rock climbinb wall i never knew about. then my backyard turned into trader joes and i was checking a lady out at my register. i told her to wait five minutes i'd be back and when i was back kate winslet was around but she looked like more anna nicole and linsday lohan but more long island mother.jenny beat kate winslet up then i went to stefanies house where i broke her faucet and hung out with her parents. i had to leave for a family event and some really giant black lady was ransacking my grandfathers apartment. i caught her and she started throwing metal pipes at me. i would catch them and throw them right back at her face. it felt like beating the boss in a level of street fighter on nintendo.then i was in a car with some people and some shady stuff went on. then i discovered a new melon that was big like a watermelon, was as soft as a grapefruit with a coral color to it. then i was driving my car to mall and i forgot to put my car in park when i got out of it. it stayed in neutral and it drove itself through the mall breaking tons and tons of glass and damaging my car.
May 12Â
Yemii feel like you're the only person who'd understand.
so i had a crazy dream yesterday (i went out drinking as well)
i was a hitman living at hofstra, none of my friends are there but i'm living in my old building, it's a dark and rainy day, i had to kill my old ra (but i loved her sooo) and my secret weapon was dropping a lavender skittle into a vitamin water because apparently that makes them explode. so i do that and run down the stairs and there goes my hit..shee's dead :( then we go downstairs and my accomplice wants to pick up girls while we're trying to make a get away, and at this point the bomb is making noises and everyone is running upstairs to see what happened and he stops fliriting and realizes we might be caught and we run into the rain into a mystery car and i wake upMay 13
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