The Bourbon Babe

Hoooo-eeee. Just when I was getting all sentimental about how there would be no “Justified” tonight, or ever again, we got ourselves a real-life Raylan-and-Boyd-worthy story right here in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. That’s right: The Case of the Missing Pappy has apparently been cracked.

Franklin County Sheriff Pat Melton announced at a news conference in Frankfort, Ky., that a grand jury has issued indictments against nine people in connection with the theft of large quantities of Pappy Van Winkle, Eagle Rare and Wild Turkey that stretch all the way back to 2008. The recovered whiskey was estimated to be worth more than $100,000, Melton said. The sheriff had said from the outset that this was “an inside job,” and he was right: Two of those indicted worked at the Buffalo Trace distillery and one worked at Wild Turkey. 

Some of those indicted were charged with trafficking in anabolic steroids, Melton said. All nine were charged with engaging in organized crime as members of a criminal syndicate. The apparent Boyd Crowder was Gilbert Thomas Curtsinger, who authorities called the ringleader of the group. With 26 years in on the loading docks at Buffalo Trace, he knew the security provisions and how to bypass them, said  Assistant Commonwealth's Attorney Zachary Becker, who also appeared at the news conference. 

Curtsinger's wife and father-in-law were also charged, as were Christopher Preston, who also worked at Buffalo Trace; his son; and  Wild Turkey worker Mark Searcy; and three other men. Authorities said the group had initially come together through softball games. 

The discovery about six weeks ago of bourbon barrels that were determined to be from Wild Turkey in Curtsinger’s back yard led to the charges.  

Attorney General Jack Conway appeared via video to tout the work of the Cyber Crimes Unit, which he said he created for just such cases. Sheriff Melton agreed that the Unit was instrumental in helping to make the connections between the syndicate’s members. “I can’t thank them enough,” he said. “These guys have been working 10- to 18-hours days,” he said.

Melton said the public had also helped by providing tips. “How many people do you know who have a barrel of bourbon in their house?” he asked. “It just doesn’t happen.” When a reporter asked Melton, who seemed on the verge of tears at one point, why he was so emotional, the sheriff replied, “It’s just an exceptional case.”

More indictments are possible, but here’s another crime: While the sealed bottles of Van Winkle might eventually be returned to the distillery, the Eagle Rare and Wild Turkey in barrels will most likely be destroyed. 

Photo by WUKY

(SPOILER ALERT: Do not read until you have savored every drop of the “Justified” series finale, “The Promise.”)

Well. That didn’t go exactly the way I expected. But I mean that as a compliment, and along with Art and Raylan, I raise a glass of Blanton’s to commemorate a job well done. Thank you, “Justified,” for six years of splendid entertainment, particularly in this final season. Thank you for bringing us such beautifully complex characters, for making us laugh even in the middle of spectacular violence. Thank you for respecting the people of Kentucky. And most of all, thank you for always getting the bourbon right.

In the end, Raylan Givens did indeed leave Harlan alive, after narrowly avoiding death at the ring-bedecked hands of Boon in a much anticipated “High Noon” showdown. (Raylan’s hat took the bullet.) I had hoped that Loretta would have the honor of dropping our crazy-eyed, flowery talking shootist, but I was satisfied with the way it played out: As the mortally wounded Boon attempted to raise his gun to finish Raylan off, she stepped on his wrist and silently watched him shuffle off that mortal coil. Sometimes a whisper really does get you further than a roar. So long, Boon. You were with us for just five episodes, but you more than earned the right to be Raylan’s final foe.

Ava also got out of Harlan, roaring away in Raylan’s car as he lay in the road with Loretta tending him. Her survival wasn’t a foregone conclusion, however. Ava began the final episode in the custody of one angry Avery Markham, who recalled what he had told her the first time they met: For a woman to survive in this life, she had to be tougher than the men.

“Hell, anyone who kills her husband, then puts a bullet in her fiance....” he continued, laughing without mirth. “My compliments on your grit. I’d say you have a bright future – assuming you have a future.”

Not willing to sell her life for $10 million, Ava called Uncle Zachariah. Of course she reached Boyd Crowder, who explained in a nice bit of understatement that Uncle Z couldn’t come to the phone right now. In another display of grit, Ava pretended to tell her uncle where to meet Avery’s men with the money, while at the same time reminding Boyd that without her, he’d never find it either.

After escaping from the encroaching deputies by throwing lit sticks of dynamite at them (”Fire in the hole!”), Boyd arrived at the drying shed. He called Markham a bona fide stoner, Markham called him a hillbilly, they called each other’s bluffs and Boyd killed Markham and his two dirty cops. Then he pointed the gun at Ava. “Look at me,” he said. “Look. At. Me.” Click. Empty chamber.

And in walked Raylan. (I must mention the scene in which Art and Raylan entered the bar to “interrogate” the deputy who knew where Markham was holding Ava. Barkeep: “To drink in here, you need a badge or a pair of tits.” Raylan, with small smirk: “Art... show him your tits.” Art, deadpan: “Let’s start with the badges.”) 

After six seasons of buildup, Raylan and Boyd were finally face to face in the inevitable showdown. And here is where the writers took the turn I was not expecting: Boyd wouldn’t pull. First, he said he had an empty gun. Raylan kicked another one to him. “I don’t care how it gets done, as long as it gets done,” he said. Hold up - Boyd wanted to ask Ava a question: “Why?”

“Honestly, Boyd,” she replied, “I put myself in your shoes and did what I thought you would do.” He gave her a look of grudging admiration and sorrow. And still he wouldn’t pull. “What’s it gonna be, Raylan?”  

Raylan was shaking, he wanted this so badly. But in the very next scene, Boyd was being led out of the shed in cuffs. All three of our leads survived! 

But only two of them really got out of Harlan. Four years later, Raylan is in Florida, wearing a new hat (Boon’s! ”I tried it on and it fit,” he told Rachel in a callback to the show’s second episode) and sharing custody of Willa with Winona, who has remarried. An envelope arrives from Rachel. Inside is a newspaper clipping about a pumpkin festival in California, and the woman in the photo looks a lot like... 

Yes, it’s Ava, who was aided in her escape by... our man Wynn Duffy! As many had predicted, he got her past the roadblock dogs by driving the mobile getaway grooming van (”Down on All Fours: The Experts of Doggy Style”) that he had requested in the previous episode. And here comes surprise No. 2: Ava has a son, named Zachariah for “the only man in my life never wanted to get anything from me.” Awwww. Boyd can never know about him, she tells Raylan, because he would ruin the boy’s life, too.

After telling the tearful Ava that he won’t turn her in - “I said you’d be fine” - Raylan makes sure of that. He visits the prison where Boyd has returned to the pulpit (and where we get one final “Ha-HA: RAY-lan Givens!”). 

Raylan shows him a falsified death certificate, saying Ava died in a car crash. Perhaps it was for the best, Boyd says. “She was trying to get out, but I just don’t think that’s possible.Sometimes I think the only way to get out of our town alive is to never have been born there.”

But Raylan got out, he adds. And why did he come back, when he could have mailed this information about Ava? It was the kind of news that should be delivered in person, Raylan replies. Boyd asks: Is that really the only reason?

And then we get the perfect ending:

“I suppose if I allow myself to be sentimental, despite all that has occurred, there is one thing I wander back to,” Raylan says, looking through the glass at Boyd. 

“We dug coal together,” Boyd replies, looking into Raylan’s eyes. Raylan looks back. “That’s right.”

BONUS: Remember last week, when Boyd’s carjacking victim predicted someday people would sing songs about him? I was so sure that Boyd wouldn’t survive the finale that I wrote one. Seems a shame to waste it, so... 

The Ballad of Boyd Crowder

Let me tell you the tale of the Outlaw Boyd Crowder

who dug in the mines long ago

They say that his face was as black as the coal

but his teeth were as white as the snow

  He dreamed of a life far away from the hollers

but his tactics made every man foe

They say that his hair was as black as the coal

but his teeth were as white as the snow

  Now Boyd Crowder, he turned on his friend Raylan Givens

and he wanted to lay that man low

They say that Boyd’s gun was as black as the coal

but his teeth were as white as the snow

  Oh they'll tell you the tale of that Outlaw Boyd Crowder

How he claimed that he loved Ava so

And they say that his heart was as black as the coal

Well, y’all, the end is near: After seven bourbon-soaked seasons, the series finale of “Justified” airs tonight. I’ll post my final “Justified” Whiskey Watch, The Last Call, tomorrow, but in the meantime, here are my Top 5 Whiskey Cameos from this final season:

5. Raylan brings Art a bottle of get-well Blanton’s. 

4. Ava has Wild Turkey 101 for breakfast.

3. Raylan uses Ancient Age to burn the contents of Arlo’s foot locker (and, symbolically, Raylan’s hated past).

2. Boyd drinks Elmer T. Lee just about all of the time, except for when...

1. Boyd breaks open the bottle of Pappy 20-Year-Old stashed in his parents’ cabin just before Ava reveals she’s a snitch.

BONUS: BEST BOURBON QUOTE OF THE SEASON/SERIES:

Raylan:  “Bourbon is easy to understand: It tastes like a warm summer’s day.”

(SPOILER ALERT: Do not read until you’ve watched the most recent episode.)

This week’s “Mad Men” episode was titled “New Business,” but it seemed more like a rerun of old business. Don does seem to be striving for some sort of redemption, but echoes of past mistakes are all around him, and at the end of the hour, his life is still as empty as his apartment. Perhaps that is the ultimate message of “Mad Men”: The only truly happy people are the fake ones in the advertisements. No matter how much they spin it, real life will always fall short for the men and women behind the campaigns. 

Wow, that’s depressing. I need another drink. But first, a quick recap of the whiskey appearances and references in Episode 9.

“NAC”: This is my new favorite acronym, Roger’s designation for those clients whose alcohol-fueled lunches mean that he should make No Afternoon Calls to them, because they will be useless.

“I already have a drink”: Diana-the-waitress’ response to Don’s invitation to get a drink after work, as she is holding a glass of whiskey when she calls him. She’s already drunk when she arrives at Don's place at 3 a.m. When he goes to her place, where she will tell him her terrible secret and send him on his way, she can offer only vodka. Sadly for bourbon fans, vodka was on the upswing in the U.S. in 1970, the year we find ourselves in the series. In 1976 it would overtake whiskey as the country’s top-selling alcoholic spirit.

Don’s office bar: Roger Sterling has helped himself to a drink as he hides out in Don's office early in the episode. Later, when Harry Crane barges in after his humiliating (for both of them) “business lunch” with Megan, Don is pouring himself a whiskey. “No, thanks,” says Harry, only then noticing that Don has no plans to offer him a drink. 

Scotch that: Megan pours a J&B in the hotel room while upbraiding her sister for criticizing their mother (Julia Ormond), who appears to have run off with Roger - even though Megan was shocked to discover the two of them post-tryst in Don’s empty apartment. By the end of the episode, though, Megan has a new view of the situation, having yelled at Don for ruining her life and called him “an aging, sloppy, selfish liar.” Don quietly agrees and writes her a million-dollar check, saying simply, “I’m sorry.” 

Women’s lib?: Peggy discovers that women can be just as opportunistic and cavalier as men when Pima, the photographer she’s hired to shoot a vermouth ad, comes on to both her and to Stan (who takes the bait). I really think that Peggy and Stan should end up together. Also, Mimi Rogers looked great.

George T. Stagg is one of the most sought-after limited-edition whiskeys from Buffalo Trace Distillery, the king of its annual Antique Collection release. It sells out in minutes. So Stagg fans will be salivating at one of the offerings in an online auction that benefits Regis Jesuit High School in Aurora, Colo.: a collection of 11 bottles in the series, from 2004-2014.

They were donated by Martha Carlin, Stagg’s great-great-granddaughter, and her brother, who each had extra bottles from those years to put together the series.

“I am from Frankfort,” Martha, who now lives in Colorado, wrote to me. “My mother was a Stagg. We have had someone in every generation working at the distillery, even after it was sold! Kind of fun.”  

You must register to get a login to bid on the Stagg, which is listed here under Online Libations. Online bidding opens on April 9 and continues for 10 days.

The value of the lot is given as “priceless,” with a minimum bid of $3,000. Here is the online description:

“This is a unique opportunity to start or complete your collection of the award-winning George T. Stagg bourbons. This collection was assembled by the great-great-granddaughter of George T. Stagg and a Regis Jesuit parent. George T. Stagg was one of Kentucky’s bourbon pioneers during the Gilded Age of Bourbon. The distillery Stagg owned during the late 1800s still operates today on the banks of the Kentucky River, now called Buffalo Trace. Uncut and unfiltered, and of an age and quality that only more than two centuries of experience can bring, this bourbon is a testament to quality, tradition and innovation. Every year included in the collection is an award-winner, including 2012 being named the #1 spirit in the world. Virtually impossible to acquire a bottle in recent years, this collection is unprecedented. 2004 – 129 proof; 2005 Fall – 141.2 proof; 2006 – 140.6 proof; 2007 – 144.8 proof; 2008 – 141.8 proof; 2009 – 141.4 proof; 2010 – 143.0 proof; 2011 – 142.6 proof; 2012 – 142.8 proof; 2013 – 128.2 proof; and 2014 – 138.1 proof.”

Packing or shipping charges are the responsibility of the winning bidder.

(SPOILER ALERT: Do not read until you have watched Episode 12, “Collateral.”)

“Justified” has always played in the gray space between good and evil, and that was never more cleverly referenced than in the opening of the series’ penultimate episode, with Raylan gone rogue, sans badge, and Boyd in a sheriff’s uniform.

Boyd quickly ditches that uniform for clothes “borrowed” from the son of the man whose pickup truck he has comandeered for his getaway. (In true TV fashion, these duds, like the uniform, fit Boyd as if tailor-made.) The man offers to give Boyd the truck, calling “the Outlaw Crowder” the closest thing Harlan County has ever had to Billy the Kid. “If they put out your greatest hits, it’d be a double album - all killer, no filler,” he says. 

It sounds like hero worship, but this man has no illusions. He knows that when Boyd insists on his driving to the mountain where Boyd will hunt Ava, his time on earth is through. “I knew I’d be looking into the black hole of your gun,” he says, “like the plague you is.” Then he asks Boyd if he remembers a man named Hut McKean. 

Boyd does not, nor does he care. Did he kill this Hut McKean? Did his men, or his drugs, or his daddy kill him? It doesn’t matter, and it doesn’t keep him from sleeping at night, he says, because unlike the other slaves of Harlan County, “My life is my own.” When the man replies, “You ain’t even heard a word I’ve said,” Boyd declares, “I’m an outlaw” and shoots him in the head. 

Boyd may not care who Hut McKean was, but I do. It’s too specific not to mean something, right?

Speaking of names, elsewhere on the mountain, Raylan, who is looking for Ava and Boyd, has run into the distant relatives who tried to kill him in Season 4. “I don’t suppose you remember my name,” says Mountain Man No. 1. Raylan gives no indication that he does. When MM No. 1 complains about how Arlo treated his people badly and about how strip mining has destroyed their land, Raylan finds a way to finally unload his past by writing a note declaring that he gives his property to “this man.” Yeah, that’s probably going to hold up in court.

Also on the trail of Ava and the money is Avery Markham. Mourning over Katherine’s body, he asks why she couldn’t have done what she was told for once and left Wynn Duffy to him. “Revenge (is) what did you in,” he says. He then ignores his own wise words by declaring in the next breath that he will “gut Wynn from head to toe.”

Wynn, meanwhile, appears to be headed out of Kentucky forever - at least, that’s what he tells Vasquez as he claims his belongings, including a tube of toothpaste for his sensitive gums. “Raylan Givens, Boyd Crowder and Avery Markham are soon to converge, like the aligning of the planets, if those planets carried guns and hated my guts,” he says. Instead, he meets a source to arrange for a used dog grooming truck with a false panel - and pays for it by slicing open the toothpaste and pulling out Katherine Hale’s jewelry. I love you, Wynn Duffy, but dammit, you are going to fool around and get yourself killed and cost me that bottle of Blanton’s after all, aren’t you?

Vasquez has issued a BOLO for Raylan and is furious that is team is still covering for him. They are all co-conspirators in the theft of $10 million, he tells them. 

So. Where is the $10 million? Ava has some of it in a backpack as she wildly runs down the mountain, having heard on Uncle Zachariah’s radio that Boyd is on the loose. Uncle Z prefers to make a stand at Grubes’ cabin, after giving what’s left of Grubes a proper burial. “We’re survivors,” he tells her.

Raylan finds Uncle Z first, and after being castigated for being as bad for Ava as Boyd has been, he heads back down the mountain after her. But who finds her first? Quite possibly the only truly good guy in Harlan County: Constable Bob. Hearing the BOLO, he’s “comin’ for ya, Raylan!” (but in a helpful way). He doesn’t even mind that Raylan has stolen his Crown Vic; he just fires up his Gremlin.

Bob cuffs Ava in the car with a zip tie, warning her not to test him. “And before you try to seduce me,” he said, adorably, “know that it’s been done before.” They hear shots fired. Drive away, Bob! But our noble hero cannot. He runs to help Raylan and is shot by Boyd. Ava manages to break free by breaking the Gremlin and runs again.

Now it’s just Boyd and Raylan on the mountain as the sun sets and the moon rises. They cross paths, fire at each other. How do you know it’s me? Boyd asks, and Raylan replies with one of the funniest lines of the entire series: “Your teeth glow in the dark.” 

They exchange more gunfire, along with taunts about who is the real villain. Who, really, has crossed the line, and what is the real prize? Just then Bob yells for help - Yay, he’s still alive! - and Raylan proves that, at least for now, he can still do the right thing. He takes Bob to the hospital, where he is apprehended by the feds. 

Boyd makes it to Uncle Z’s cabin. He avoid being shot by the Z Man and instead takes him down with a bullet. But the crafty old miner has one last card to play: He’s wired himself up with explosives! BLAM! Yet another “Justified” character is blown to smithereens. Boyd is injured but we don’t know how badly. (And I bet Uncle Z buried the rest of the money with Grubes.) 

And Ava? She makes it to the very bridge where she cut the CI deal with Raylan, only to be picked up by those dirty cops working for Avery. They head toward the barn where Avery’s hired hand, Boon (read my interview with actor Jonathan Tucker here), has shot Loretta’s hired hand (and erstwhile boyfriend) and Avery has finished him off. Avery likes Loretta, and approves of her moxie in suggesting that he needs her more than she needs him to make his weed plan work. Why, she reminds him of a young Katherine, he says, as they settle down to wait for Ava. 

Whoo. I don’t know what is going to happen next week, but I have a feeling that what Avery said to Ava way back in Episode 3 will come back to haunt him: “Women who aren’t harder than men don’t survive this kind of work.” I mean, does Loretta look spooked by Avery or Boon?

Boon is one creepy dude. Avery Markham’s last hired gun standing on “Justified,” he has a haircut reminiscent of Javier Bardem’s in “No Country for Old Men,” mannerisms that recall Crispin Glover, and a definite desire to be the one who finally outdraws Raylan Givens. But the actor who plays him, Jonathan Tucker, couldn’t be more of a gentleman. After responding to last week’s recap, in which I called Boon “insufferable” (his tweet: "insufferable? that there sums squarely the look Jennie here'll put on your face when she parts my side holster." -boon), he kindly agreed to an interview ahead of tonight’s penultimate episode.

Q. You've come into a popular show in its final season, and in a short time have created one of its most memorable bad guys. Where did you take your inspiration forBoon and his distinctive mannerisms?

A. You have to collect characters from the ride and find characters from within. Boon’s a mixture of both. Fox. Mimic. Old-timer. Loose cannon. Lonely little boy with a father complex.

Q. What are Boon's real feelings for Loretta? I’m hoping she plugs him, but he seems to think they'd make a cute couple.

A. Real feelings? Loretta is his: plain and simple.

Q. Boon's boss, Avery Markham, declared early on that he never developed a taste for bourbon (which immediately made him suspect in my book). As a Wild West wannabe, Boon has to shoot whiskey, right? What's his brand of choice? And how about you, Jonathan: Are you a bourbon drinker?

A. Boon and Tucker: Maker’s Mark. Cask strength. Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey. 113.2 proof. 56.6% alc/vol. Comes exclusively in a 375ML bottle straight from the proud town of Loretto. A drip of filtered water to open her up and let the engines roar, Carla Carlton.

Q. What would taking Raylan down mean to Boon? And what has being on "Justified" meant to you?

A. 1. Another ring on my finger. 2. A privilege.

Q. Finally, Raylan seems mostly amused by Boon. But I'm more than a little nervous. Can you reassure me in any way?

(SPOILER ALERT: Do not read until you’ve watched this week’s episode, “Severance.”)

I wondered, heading into this second half of the final season of “Mad Men” after a 10-month hiatus, whether I would even remember what was going on. But I needn’t have worried: Everyone is pretty much in the same place they were, and, indeed, have always been - in Don Draper’s case, depressingly so. Peggy Lee’s “Is That All There Is?” provides a fitting soundtrack for a group of people pondering the life not lived, or the same life lived over and over again.

Don and Megan have divorced, and he is still drinking, pouring the contents of a flask into coffee at a diner with Roger, Roger’s mustache and three young lovelies. They may well have been among those auditioning for the razor commercial Don is casting in the show’s opening scene, cleverly shot to initially appear as if he and the young woman are the only ones in the room. It’s interesting to note that, ever the ad man, he is now tweaking details from his horrible childhood into amusing patter. He asks the dark-haired waitress, “Do I know you?”

But Don comes home alone to a dark apartment, preferring to turn the lights back off rather than contemplate its emptiness. Soon he’s welcoming a stewardess who’s on a layover. When she spills red wine on his white carpet, her posture in trying to blot it up recalls Megan angrily cleaning after the party she threw for Don’s birthday. But all that is left of Megan is an earring. Don’s reaction to the spill is telling, and a metaphor for his entire life: He throws the bedspread over the stain rather than deal with it.

That night, Don has a dream: Ted and his mustache usher in the next candidate for the commercial - and it’s Rachel Katz. For the first and only time in the episode, Don looks happy. “I’m supposed to tell you you missed your flight,” she says. Then Pete - not Ted - closes the door, says, “Back to work!” and Don wakes up, with a stewardess.

Does this mean that Don has missed out on the one person with whom he might have found real love? Eager to reconnect with her, he discovers she had died of leukemia the previous week. He looks truly stricken when he visits the apartment where friends and family are sitting shiva and is told by Rachel’s sister that “she lived the life she wanted to live.”

He returns to the diner, where he has sex in the alley with the waitress, who looks a little like Rachel, and he ends the episode there, trying to understand his dream and Rachel’s death. “Someone dies, you just want to make sense of it, but you can’t,” the waitress tells him.

Ken Cosgrove, meanwhile, is on the verge of changing his life - resigning from the firm to write his novel - but instead changes his mind, only to be fired by McCann Erickson. He drinks a glass of whiskey - Seagram’s, judging by the cart in Pete’s office - as Pete takes over his accounts. Later, Ken gets revenge by taking a job as advertising director with Dow, where he will be the demanding client of Pete and Roger - but also still very much enmeshed in a job he hates.

Elsewhere, Joan and Peggy are still dealing with overt sexism in the workplace, forced to endure blatant double entendres from the giggling boys at McCann Erickson during their discussion on Topaz hosiery that make Joan want “to burn this place down.” But instead of supporting each other, the two women lash out at each other in the elevator, with Peggy implying that Joan’s clothing invites such comments and Joan retorting that Peggy can’t dress that way because she is too plain.

(SPOILER ALERT! Do not read further until you have watched Episode 11, “Fugitive Number One.”)

There was no whiskey - everyone was too busy running or shooting or dying to drink - but there was sure a lot to watch in this action-packed episode of “Justified.” 

Ava, of course, is the Fugitive Number One of the title, and based on what we saw last night, she doesn’t have the greatest getaway plan. Uncle Zachariah (who, as we all knew, didn’t “run the wrong way” in that mine blast) takes her and the stolen money to an old-timer he says can get them to safety via old moonshiner trails. Unfortunately, they discover that the old-timer failed to get himself out of his own cabin, where he lies mummified on the floor.

Raylan is hot on her trail - but the feds are seriously questioning his motives after he appeared to let her get away. “Your marshal and his girlfriend have stolen $10 million right from under our noses!” Vasquez thunders at Art, who is finally back in uniform. Art can’t quite believe that, but when Raylan refuses to come back to Lexington as ordered, Art gives it to him straight: Raylan has 48 hours to make something happen. And then? “Everybody’s out looking for Boyd. I’ll be the one comin’ after you.”

Ah yes, Boyd. Surviving Ava’s bullet - I believe the technical term the doctor used was “you are one lucky sumbitch” - he is raring to go after her and his money, which, he tells Raylan, are one and the same. And should something bad happen to her? “Maybe she has whatever that is coming.” 

If that wasn’t enough to remind us that despite his charming personality and large vocabulary Boyd truly is a bad man, we got more evidence when he shot Carl dead to create the chaos that let him escape from the hospital. Poor Carl. He was Boyd’s most loyal ally; in fact, he intended to help Boyd escape rather than kill him as Avery Markham had demanded in exchange for letting Earl live. But Carl had already written his own ending in that earlier jailhouse scene:

Carl: “It’s like that old saying.”

Earl: “Crime doesn’t pay?”

Carl: “Goddamn it, Earl - no! ‘They’s no honor among thieves.’ Crime does pay, as long as the criminals you’re working for don’t screw you over.”

Later, in Wynn Duffy’s RV, we saw perhaps the most touching display of loyalty that we’ve ever seen on “Justified.” Katherine Hale had arrived to kill Wynn following Mikey’s tip that he was the rat who’d gotten her husband killed. But like so many villains before her, Katherine messed up by monologuing before she pulled the trigger. Her little speech about loyalty to one’s partner caused Mikey to have a change of heart, putting aside the facts that he never got to choose the driving music and never liked being called “Mikey.”

What resulted was a spectacularly ugly fight that left Katherine dead with a crushed throat and Michael dying from about five gunshot wounds. “Hold me,” he asked Wynn after giving him the key to the cuffs. I don’t think Wynn knew just how much Mikey meant to him until that final moment. It was very touching, but of course the most important part is that WYNN DUFFY IS STILL ALIVE, AND SO IS MY BLANTON’S BET.

I’m not sure Katherine would have lasted a lot longer, anyway. Her “love” scene with Avery was fraught with tension; I kept expecting her to shoot him with her purse or him to shoot her in the back. But he did seem genuinely upset to learn of her death.  

If only we’d seen the last of that insufferable Boon and his custom-made hat. (He had rejected the diner guy’s because it smelled of “patchouli and scared hipster.”) The show is clearly prepping us for a Wild West showdown between his gunslinger and Raylan, but I’m kind of hoping Loretta takes him out. 

Today’s Shot of Trivia comes to us courtesy of Angel’s Envy: Why does the standard bourbon barrel have a 53-gallon capacity? 

(SPOILER ALERT: Do not read until you have watched Episode 10, “Trust.” Trust me.)

There were a couple of shots in this episode, but let’s get to the big one first: AVA SHOT BOYD. I did NOT see that coming, you guys. Neither did Boyd - or Raylan, even though you could tell he figured she was up to something on that strained-but-still-flirtatious ride to the meeting place. Ava still has plenty of feminine wiles, but rather than trust they’d be enough - again - she instead chose to lift Boyd’s own gun and use it on him. 

Boyd was shocked - “Baby?” - and Raylan was impressed. But really, Ava had no good choices anymore. She knew she couldn’t completely trust Boyd, and Raylan had just told her that even if she led him straight to her man and his millions, she was going back to prison because Vasquez insisted on, you know, following the law or something. 

But as sorry and as impressed as Raylan might be, he can’t just let Mrs. Ofay ride off into the sunset with her $10 million. (”Ofay” is a disparaging West African word meaning “white people” - Limehouse does have a sense of humor.) “I’m gonna come after ya,” he told her almost regretfully. And she, with the same elan that Han Solo employed in similarly perilous circumstances in “The Empire Strikes Back,” replied with the same line of dialogue: “I know.”

Poor Boyd. After an entire season - series, really - of scheming, he finally got the money he needed to escape from Harlan, only to be shot down mid-celebration by the person he had expected to escape with. In the end, he trusted Ava too much and respected her too little. Plus, she had been fortified by several glasses of bourbon - first, Elmer T. Lee with Boyd and then Ancient Age without him, above, when he went into his office to confer with Limehouse. (Limehouse enjoyed a swig from a pint in his pocket that I’m darned if I could identify. Anyone?)

Boyd’s not dead, but where he is might be even worse: wounded, betrayed, broke (he gave that entire $100,000 “reward” money to Limehouse for the escape package) and on the wrong side of both Raylan Givens AND Avery Markham and Katherine Hale.

There was a lot of broken trust in this episode. Boyd "served up” Earl and Carl, his most loyal lieutenant, by using them as decoys for the Marshal’s Service. After using Katherine as bait for Markham, Boyd couldn’t resist telling him that he, too, had been betrayed. I was as surprised as Katherine that Avery paid the ransom anyway. He must really love her... although I didn’t like the way he smiled at her after she asked, “So are you going to kill me?” (Side note: Where do bad guys get those cool duffel bags they always have for toting lots of guns or bundles of cash?)

In the night’s second-most shocking moment (at least to me), Mikey turned on Wynn Duffy, handcuffing him to the table in the RV and leaving Katherine a voicemail about having some interesting information. Is this really a result of Mikey’s “moral code”? Wouldn’t his loyalty be to Wynn? I am particularly concerned about Wynn’s fate because I have wagered a bottle of Blanton’s that he survives the series. C’mon, you tan cockroach - you can do it!

The only real show of loyalty we saw was Boon’s (purchased) fealty to Markham. “I do what you pay me to do,” he said cheerfully. Unfortunately, this week that included plugging Loretta’s great-aunt, who, aside from the fact that her preferred pour was single-malt Scotch, was one of my all-time favorite Harlan residents. “You think I don’t know who you are?” she spat at Markham. “Not your name. Who you are. What you are.” 

Avery seems to be growing weary of what he is, and of the tremendous and unexpected trouble it has been to work this little land deal. “Ever notice how the necessities of our line of work weigh heavy on your conscience?” he asked Boon, who replied that as far as he could tell, “the sweet spot is either to be poor enough you can’t afford to have one, or rich enough to hire someone to carry the weight.” 

How great would it have been if Loretta’s aunt had blown away Markham’s last hired man when he opened her front door?  

(SPOILER ALERT: DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU HAVE PARTAKEN OF EPISODE 9, “BURNED.”)

As with many “Justified” episode titles, this week’s has multiple meanings. First, of course, Ava realized that Raylan knows she is burned - that she’s confessed to Boyd she is informing on him. Raylan doesn’t take any immediate action, however, instead complimenting Ava’s dress. She, meanwhile, continues to play double agent by telling Raylan that Boyd plans to crack the Pizza Portal safe during Avery Markham’s party, above. It is more obvious than ever that while Ava may truly love Boyd, her real loyalty is to herself. Then she goes to the kitchen to start a fire that clears the restaurant.

Boyd gets burned by Zachariah, who clobbers him and chains him up directly underneath the dynamite’s lit fuse, where, he tells Boyd, “You’ll be buried by your own goddamn greed.” Indispensable Carl comes to the rescue, though, and he, Boyd and Wynn Duffy all make it out of the mine alive. (While we did not witness the fate of Uncle Z, we can pretty much assume that his time on earth is short.) The safe remains secure.

And why was Wynn in the mine shaft, you might ask? Very much against his will, he is working with Raylan after it was revealed rather anticlimactically (”You got me - I’m the rat”) that Wynn is the one who caused Grady Hale’s death. (One of my favorite scenes was Wynn’s acting out how the phone conversation might go to get more details of Boyd’s plan: “Hey, Boyd? Yeah, I know - super-weird! Anyway, could you tell me what time you are planning to blow up that safe, and who will be with you?”)

Raylan and Art encouraged Wynn to cooperate by literally turning up the heat - on his tanning bed  - and then threatening to inform Katherine of his treacherous ways. 

Now, I had been thinking that Wynn was sweet on Katherine, but perhaps he is motivated more by fear - and wisely so. She proved that a Seabass is no match for a woman in a leather dress when she wasted Avery’s final “merc” with a gun hidden in her purse. How did Seabass, a trained killer, not see that coming? I saw it coming, and I just watch a lot of TV. Avery was impressed by her resourcefulness; I was impressed that she ordered up a cleaner to deal with splattered Seabass in French. Was the cleaner coming from Paris or Versailles? (Remember: That’s “Ver-SALES” here in Kentucky, y’all.)

Avery has a new henchman, and with his “No Country for Old Men” hairstyle and jittery Crispin Glover mannerisms, he’s scarier than the rest of them put together. Boon shows up to threaten Loretta, which sends her to Boyd (who is drinking his signature Elmer T. Lee with Ava in his bar). Loretta needs muscle to amp up her weed operation. Boyd says she can have it all, as long as she keeps “Harlan for Harlan,” and his reason is sound: “I’m a bad man, but Avery Markham is a real bad man.” 

And so we all end up back at the Pizza Portal Party. Raylan sips on Blanton’s after requesting “the most expensive kind” of whiskey, since it’s on the house. (No, that’s not the most expensive bourbon in the world, but hey, it’s a pizza place owned by a guy who doesn’t like bourbon.) Raylan and Boyd seem equally startled when Loretta interrupts Avery’s big “I’m not a bad man; I came back here for love” speech with what seems to be her unofficial announcement that she’s running for mayor. Boyd’s not thrilled that she revealed him as her biggest supporter (”Have you ever heard that a whisper will get you further than a roar?”). 

By episode’s end, Boyd is furious but still determined to get that money. Raylan is still determined to get Boyd, who he predicts will come after it even harder and stupider. Boon is obviously determined to get Raylan, who seems a little too nonchalant about the threat; does he not watch TV either? Ava, as noted before, is determined to get out alive, but can she? 

Honestly, the only one I’m sure will still be standing at the end is Wynn Duffy, who toggles between loyalties and locations with ease. As he observed to Boyd, “Home is wherever the RV takes me.” 

(SPOILER ALERT: DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU'VE WATCHED EPISODE 8, "DARK AS A DUNGEON.")

Bourbon is a very versatile spirit, as "Justified" has amply illustrated this season: It is a perfect celebratory sip and a great way to start your day. Drinking it all night with someone can bring you closer together, and admitting you never developed a taste for it can positively ID you as the bad guy. 

In Episode 8, "Dark as a Dungeon," we saw a few more ways that bourbon can come in handy:

Bourbon can steel you for the unpleasant task of finally going through the detritus of your past, and then serve as a handy accelerant for disposing of it. Ancient Age has never burned so much as when Raylan poured it over the contents of Arlo's foot locker and set it ablaze. Raylan also had that headstone that's been bothering a lot of viewers dug up, but doesn't seem any surer than we are of where he will move it.

Bourbon can allow you to seize the upper hand in a tense situation. Katherine Hale poured herself a glass of Eagle Rare while talking with Art about who might have killed her husband, but pointedly did not offer him any, and further demonstrated her superiority in the situation by telling him to let himself out. Raylan, meanwhile, did not wait for an offer before helping himself to a glass of bourbon from an unidentifiable bottle (Old Fitzgerald, maybe?) in Avery Markham's pizza joint.

Bourbon can defuse a tense situation. Ava ended the delicious cat-and-mouse stand-off between Raylan and Boyd shown above by rebuking Boyd thusly: "Where's your manners? How long are you going to keep Raylan out there without offering him a drink?" (Oh, how I love the way Boyd says, "RAY-lan Givens!" I might make it my ring tone.) 

Raylan once again did not drink at Ava's, but he did end up flushing out Ty Walker. I almost felt sorry for Ty. He sure went through a lot only to end up shot in the back - although as Raylan helpfully pointed out, "If you wanted to get shot in the front, you shoulda run toward me." The verbose villain didn't even get to finish his last sentence: "It wasn't just the money. It was...." Was what? The great dental plan?

For Boyd, of course, it is all about the money. In a sly turn of events, after trying all season to crack the vault in Markham's basement, Boyd was practically ushered into it as Markham counted out his $100,000 reward for giving up Ty Walker. That's twice as much money as Ava was willing to accept for snitching, and she begged Boyd to take it and run. But the temptation of $10 million is too strong, just as I'm sure Raylan knew it would be. 

Raylan also knows that Ava has confessed her role as a CI to Boyd, and that Boyd's crew is blasting their way up to the Pizza Portal.

And so, as our final season flows inevitably to its end on a river of bourbon, the focus is firmly back on our three main characters, still trying to outrun their pasts but with wildly different degrees of optimism.

Boyd: "Don't eulogize the past until the future gets its turn."

Raylan: "In Harlan, the past ain't behind you - it's vertical. You dig down deep enough, you find another layer of horror."

Ava: "The past and the future are a fight to the death."

Diageo is bringing the I.W. Harper brand back to the U.S. for the first time in more than 20 years this month (it has been available only in Asia) with the release of I.W. Harper Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey and Limited Edition I.W. Harper 15-Year-Old Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey.

Whiskey Row Bourbon Whiskey

88 proof; no age statement

$43.99/750ml

The story: Whiskey Row is a bourbon blended by Kentucky Artisan Distillery, a new distillery started in a former ice cream factory in Crestwood, Ky., by a partnership including former Brown-Forman president Stephen Thompson. The name pays tribute to Louisville's Whiskey Row; the label features an 1864 etching of Main Street. Kentucky Artisan eventually plans to distill its own bourbon as well as serve as a cooperative for others who want to produce spirits.

Aroma: Sweet, lots of corn - like kettlecorn; also a grassy botanical note 

Taste: Soft on entry, dry through the mid-palate, a little fire at the end. Sweet, lots of grains, white pepper, nutmeg on the short finish. 

The verdict: While there is no age statement, this has to be a fairly young blend - it can't be much more than four years old. It's not terribly complex but not in a bad way; it would make a good mixing bourbon. There's more fire than you might expect from an 88 proof bourbon. I found that an ice cube helped to smooth the rough edges.

(SPOILER ALERT: DO NOT VENTURE FURTHER UNTIL YOU'VE WATCHED EPISODE 7, "THE HUNT.")

Oh, "Justified." You get a lot of Kentucky things right, but you get so many so wrong. This week there were some of both. 

Right: Pappy Van Winkle 20-year-old would indeed be a bourbon you'd stash away to celebrate a special occasion.

Wrong: There was no Pappy Van Winkle warehouse fire in 1995. There was a big fire in 1996 at Heaven Hill that destroyed the distillery and seven warehouses, creating a river of fire that flowed down into the creek that supplied the distillery and setting it ablaze for a time. In 2013, someone did steal 65 cases of Pappy 20, worth more than $26,000 retail and who knows what on the secondary market, from Buffalo Trace Distillery. The case remains unsolved.

Right: Drinking Pappy is like "drinking silk," as Boyd puts it.

Wrong: You do not shoot Pappy. You savor it.

Right: Boyd's parents would likely have a cabin that he would use for hunting. 

Wrong: It would not be in California. Those shots of the "Kentucky" forests really take me out of the show for a moment. The cabin would also not be in Bullittville, Ky., which doesn't exist. There is a Bullittsville, Ky., in Boone County, about a four-hour drive from Harlan.   

Right, maybe: Boyd could be hunting razorback hogs, but it would be unlikely he'd find one that quickly in Kentucky. They are more prevalent in places like Texas. The Razorbacks that Kentuckians are more familiar with are the ones who come here from Arkansas to play the Kentucky Wildcats. (The lack of any mention of the Cats is another misstep for this show; UK basketball is a religion in Eastern Kentucky. Maybe that's some NCAA regulation?)

Wrong: There is no wild hog season in Kentucky. If you find 'em, you can shoot 'em year round.

Right: Woodford Reserve would indeed have been a good bourbon over which Boyd and Johnny could have hashed out their differences. SNL used Woodford in its "Bourbon Summit" cold open earlier this season.

Wrong: We all know Boyd would still have killed Johnny.

But he didn't kill Ava, even after she blurted out that she was a snitch and had sold him out following their increasingly tense series of exchanges about commitment, trust, loyalty and the way a man should treat a woman. (Ava: "Are you going to hit me over the head with this bottle like Bowman would have?" Hell, no, Ava - that is Pappy 20!) Turns out Boyd was almost relieved that Ava is working as a CI for Raylan - he was worried she was sleeping with him. If that was the case, Boyd said, handing her his gun, she could just shoot him right there.

Of course she didn't, and they renewed their love for each other... and then we found out the magazine had been empty. Uh-oh.