boringmenace

After leaving the cottage and having a tearful goodbye at the airport as official boyfriends, they had been surviving off of texts and facetimes for months. They had tried to see each other during the preseason, but due to other obligations, every effort failed.

Shane thought he might lose his mind. 

He felt stupid. Even just last season it didn’t feel this damn hard. Ignoring his feelings also made it possible to ignore just how deeply he would miss Ilya in the times they were apart. Now it consumed him. It thrashed in him in a way that left his chest tight and pained. Sometimes it would get so bad that he couldn’t stop himself from telling Ilya how much it hurt, and he would feel a little better when Ilya would tell him he felt the same.

But tonight was their first game against each other of the season. The Raiders were in Montreal, and Shane was going to have Ilya to himself for an entire night.

They leaned down across from each other on the ice for the face off and it took every ounce of control for Shane to stop himself from reaching for his boyfriend in front of the entire stadium.

“How was your summer?” Shane asked, daring to meet Ilya’s eyes.

Ilya’s face split into a grin. “Very good. Best in a long time.”

Montreal won.

The moment Ilya let himself inside Shane’s apartment Shane was on him, wrapping his arms around Ilya in a vice-like grip.

And then Ilya was kissing him. And kissing him and kissing him and kissing him and-

“Wait,” Shane gasped, pulling away. Ilya raised a brow, not-so subtley tugging at the hem of his shirt. “I wanna show you something.”

Intrigued, Ilya gestured in front of him. “Lead the way.”

Shane grabbed Ilya’s hand and pulled him toward the kitchen, Ilya’s feet stuttering as the dining table came more into view. Shane stopped short, suddenly feeling self conscious. 

There were a couple candles lit and two plates beside each other, filled with food. A bottle of wine and some glasses framed the display. “I was thinking,” Shane began. “You know, we can’t really like… go on dates or anything. So I thought I could, like, bring a date to us, maybe.” 

Ilya didn’t respond at first and just stared, leaving Shane feeling compelled to explain more. “It’s steamed fish. I was trying to think of something that we’d both like, I hope it’s okay.”

Ilya began to blink rapidly and turned to Shane, the smile on his face showing every single tooth in his mouth. “Shane Hollander,” he said, the smile sounding in his voice. “You’re taking me on a date?”

Shane huffed and nodded. “Yeah.”

Ilya grabbed his face with both hands and smacked a loud kiss to his lips. “I love you,” he murmured into Shane’s mouth.

Shane didn’t know happiness could feel like this. This… big. “And I love you. Come on, before it gets cold.”

The two sat hunched together while they ate, giggling and whispering to each other as if they weren’t the only ones in the whole apartment. They stole kisses, grabbed knees, tapped feet. 

Shane was damn near in Ilya’s lap the whole dinner.

That is, until he was actually in Ilya’s lap once they finished, fusing his mouth to Ilya’s in a way that left Ilya gasping.

It’s… fine, overall. But he knows that sleep doesn’t come as easily to him as it does to the average person. It takes time for him to get his brain to turn off all the way, it takes a few tosses and turns to get comfortable. It can even be hard to stay asleep sometimes, the smallest of sounds or movements from a teammate in a hotel room can jostle him right awake at random hours of the night.

Unless he sleeps on Shane. Not even next to Shane. But on top of Shane.

The first time it happened was at the cottage. It was their first night together and Ilya had found himself curled up on Shane’s lap in front of the fire, Shane’s fingers soothingly scrunched in his hair, scratching at his scalp in just the best way. And Ilya was tired. Exhausted from the flight, from the anxiety of facing this large expanse of time he was to spend with the man he loved but had not expressed it, and opening up about his mother was the final blow, leaving him so emotionally drained that the flames licking in front of him just turned into an orange blur.

He wanted to stay there forever, with Shane’s thighs pillowing him, a hand rubbing up and down his body with another in his hair. So he closed his eyes. 

Ilya had no idea he had fallen asleep until he later felt rubbing at the space behind his ear on the edge of his jaw, Shane’s voice guiding him back to consciousness. “It’s late, Ilya,” Shane murmured. “Why don’t you start heading to bed while I put out the fire? I’ll be right behind you.”

Ilya made sure to stay awake until Shane clambered into the bed ten minutes later.

The next time was only days later. Shane was sitting across from him on the couch, their feet pressed together, his eyes shining, voice wobbling as he said “Don’t marry Svetlana." Ilya couldn’t stop himself from standing up, gathering the blanket that had been draped over him, and flopping into Shane’s side.

“I’m fine,” Shane had begun to protest as Ilya pulled the blanket over them both.

“I didn’t say you weren’t,” Ilya replied simply, squirming up against Shane until he could tuck his head on Shane’s shoulder, forehead pressed to his neck. “Maybe I’m just cold.”

Shane scoffed and looked back down at his phone, Ilya quickly scanning the screen. “Are you really reading hockey shit right now?” 

He felt Shane shrug against his head. “I know, I know. Call me boring, I accept it.”

Ilya grinned and snuggled closer. “Is fine. You’re good pillow either way.”

Shane rested his head on Ilya’s and began to scroll, and Ilya could do nothing but close his eyes, and let sleep take him in seconds. He was woken up again later, Shane gently whispering in his ear to coax him to bed.

…Only to wake him later in the middle of the night, promptly kicking Ilya’s ass with a detailed plan about how they could spend the rest of their lives together. Ilya passed out on Shane like a human sized weighted blanket, tears still wet on his face.

The sweetest time Ilya did it at the cottage was in front of Shane’s parents. The day after Shane came out to them, Yuna and David stopped by for dinner. Eventually the group sat by the fire, stars twinkling in the sky, and Ilya could feel himself crashing. Between the sex and the emotional conversations, the amount of sleep he was having was not enough, and he could feel it. Shane and his parents were chatting around him and Ilya lost focus, leaning over his knees and staring into the fire, trying to focus on the shapes of the flames to keep his eyes open.

He eventually felt a gentle pull at his shoulder. It was Shane guiding him to lean back against the back of the couch with him, tucking Ilya into his neck and shoulder once again. Ilya wanted to object, but found himself curling into Shane’s warmth, and closed his eyes. 

Shane didn’t wake him this time, instead the continued voices pulled him back to awareness. He kept his eyes closed and listened to the conversation, not wanting to lose the way Shane held him. Ilya began to realize that they were talking about him.

“-been really tired these past few days. It’s been a lot for both of us.”

“I can imagine,” Yuna replied softly. “He seems quite comfortable with you.”

“He’s been doing this a couple of times,” Shane’s grip on Ilya’s shoulder tightened in a squeeze. “Knocks right out on me.”

“Because he knows you’re safe.” Yuna said. Then, after a stretch of silence, “He seems like a really sweet boy.”

“Yeah,” Shane said after a beat. “He is.”

It took everything in Ilya not to smile.

And it became a regular occurrence after that. Shane would joke that Ilya was just using him as a cheat code, since being on top of him seemed to magically make Ilya pass out in seconds, but Yuna’s words stuck with him. The safety that Shane gave him was unlike anything he ever had, and he took advantage of that whenever he could. Over the following years, Ilya would always find himself flopping on top of Shane whenever possible. Shane would be reading his book in bed in his adorable glasses and Ilya would press into his neck, read a few words of his boring hockey book, and sleep. He would drape himself over Shane on the couch, press his face into Shane’s chest, and sleep. Once they’re on the Centaurs together, he would sleep on Shane during flights because planes made him more nervous after the emergency landing and would rather not be conscious. 

And as for Shane? Shane loved it. He loved every part of it. He loved the moment he could feel Ilya’s body slacken, he loved the soft snoring noises he would make. And he especially loved when he would wake Ilya up. He would blink up at Shane so softly and scrub at his eyes, smiling dreamily as Shane rubbed whatever part of his body that he had access to. And Ilya would always tilt his head up for a kiss, which Shane would of course oblige. And Ilya would make the cutest noise on the planet, only reserved for these moments, where Shane wakes him up to herd Ilya to wherever he needs to be next. It’s just the softest noise of contentment and peace, sometimes Shane would kiss him a second time just to hear it again.