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“i would greatly appreciate it.” she replied in a serious tone even when she knew he was just joking. “shut your face, i only do that because the bed gets too cold and i hate that!” she blatantly lied. they both knew better, it didn’t matter if he ended up in the couch after an argument or just out of exhaustation, it was a given fact salem would wander out their room looking for him at any time in the middle of the night. “maybe once you stop being a smartass.” she murmured with a small roll of her eyes, tilting her head to the side and closing her eyes as she felt the male working her tensed muscles. “i’m carrying a peanut who spends the whole day kicking me, i’ve earned a back rub.”

the blonde sighed softly as the male kept reassuring her, truly there wasn’t much she could argue there when all he did was agree with her. “you make it really hard to be mad at you.” she mumbled in defeat, at least until she heard his irrational comment. “hey!! do you want to sleep on the couch, torre?” salem asked with a frown, not meaning much with it by this point, but it wouldn’t keep her from arguing (and that had nothing to do with her hormones). salem followed, humming as she sat on the bed to take off her shoes, something she didn’t even realized how much she needed until she got them off, in second thought that might have been what got her so grumpy in the first place. “babe... would you rub my back?” she asked softly, barely giving him a glance.

it was hard to argue with that logic, but not as hard as it would be to admit she was probably making a storm in a glass of water. it was like whenever her hormones should’ve been hitting the breaks they just his the gas more. “well don’t i mean anything ? i hardly got to enjoy dinner at all because a hoe was rubbing herself all over my man and he didn’t even flinch !! why won’t you get it ?!  ” she asked loudly. it couldn’t be just her, right ? surely any other girl in the world would be just as upset about a girl flirting with their husband. she sighed, her lower lip pushing into a small pout and deflating like a balloon as he murmured the sweet words. it wasn’t until he asked about sleeping in the couch that her hormones came to a stop, almost like if the question had taken them by surprise. “i’m being crazy, aren’t i ? ” salem finally asked softly after a few seconds of silence, pinching the bridge of her nose.

it was virtually impossible to be mad at arlo. especially because the very rare occasions she’d be mad he’d be so understanding she ended up feeling bad she was annoyed at all. it was easily like kicking a puppy. now however, her hormones were running rampant and wrecking havoc in her emotions. “hands to yourself, torre.” she groaned, clear sign of the anger bubbling inside her since not in a million years she’d be one to reject her beloved’s touch. hands mindlessly resting on top of her belly, salem refused to utter a word all the ride home, if she was a cartoon she’d be sure arlo would be able to see the smoke coming out of her ears. it was definitely supernatural, the way the girl seemed to be able to argue against the male’s gentle ways. she had been living with him getting female attention since forever, but not it felt like it itched underneath her skin. “arlo.” she started, “that bitch was drooling all over you right in front of me and you did nothing. like i wasn’t even there!” she argued, pulling away from his hold on her face.

in some part of her brain there was a little voice yelling at salem with everything in her to keep it together, she had known arlo for years and both times they were together he had never given her a reason to doubt him, he was one of the very few good ones. the other majority of her brain was already throwing plates against the walls and storming off in 7 different ways. “don’t you salem me.” she sentenced lowly, unable to keep her eyes from narrowing at him as he so selflessly reassured her more than any male with half his patience would. “logically?? so what? now im not logical?!?! i’m not blind arlo! the bitch was ready to lick nutella off your abs!” she groaned, having to bite her tongue not to snap at the girl herself once she walked by with the check, and probably with her phone number and a heart doodle, she didn’t doubt. “don’t try getting cute with me!” she added as she caught his grin. she would’ve liked to seem a lot more intimidating than she figured she looked like as she tried to get up from her seat, her little belly showing up from under the table. “i want to go home now.”

salem’s wedding / honeymoon (wine induced) stories

“maybe it’s time to put that patience to the test, let’s see... what could i possibly get away with?” she wondered teasingly, gasping as a sudden thought came to her. “oh my god, can pepe live with us??” she asked, having to laugh seconds later as she pecked his lips gently. “weird, i hear the words but they all describe you, not me.” she murmured, pushing his hair back. “wow, so they’re gonna get serenated more than me already huh? i’d read them stories but i don’t think mine are kids-friendly.” salem noted with an exaggerated pout, though it didn’t last long as her hand came to rest on top of his. “you’re the only one i’d ever do this with.” she assured him, “is it acceptable if i just wear your clothes everywhere for the next 8 months? i have a great reason now, you know?” she wondered with a grin, “before i know it i’m gonna be a little cow, my bras don’t even fit anymore.” salem laughed.

“wait! can i use that as a get out of jail free card? you know... when i fuck up and you get mad, ‘arlo! i’m carrying your child!!” she laughed breathlessly, “if i had known i would’ve gotten pregnant ages ago.” salem teased, cupping his cheeks. “i’m glad you’re here though.” her smile only grew when she heard how excited he was, she knew, but it still made her warm inside to hear him. “i’m scared.” she admitted, not wanting to lie to him, but also quick to assure him she didn’t see her pregnancy as a bad thing. “but all i can do is take care and hope our little peanut comes to this world as healthy as possible. i’ve done a lot of stupid, reckless things because i’ve been scared, but i don’t want it to keep me from the things i truly want.” she murmured, “i want us to paint a nursery, i want to feel the kicks when you start talking to my belly.” salem laughed softly, “because i know you, you’re so gonna talk to my belly... i want to have a family with you. and i know that any baby with half your genes is already 100% perfection.” she finished, feeling her eyes watering once more, “god, stupid hormones!”

“either that or I have the world’s longest indigestion” Salem joked, always dropping dumb remarks during serious moments, but a small gasp escaped as she took in his expression. “oh my god baby don’t cry because you’re gonna make me cry!” she cooed and almost on cue her own eyes watered. “just last night i cried over a toilet paper commercial!” she whined with a soft laugh, almost unable to kiss him back because of her own smile. “you’re gonna be the best dad” she assured him softly, naturally moving to sit on his lap and cuddle against his chest. “so... are you happy?” she asked teasingly, kissing him back before resting her head on his shoulder. salem had been very nervous when she first found out, and she figured she would always be nervous about any kids that had half her genes, but finally having arlo home and cuddling into his warm torso immediately made her feel at ease, and his palpable excitement made her heart swell. “i told your sister... i’m sorry, baby” she said softly, “morning sickness has been a bitch... so she came over with crackers she swears by, and ice cream and brought a shit ton of vitamins.” salem giggled softly, “but she promised that she wouldn’t tell anyone, it’s too soon... our baby is just a little blueberry.”

she kissed him back with a soft hum, smiling to herself as she pulled back just enough to drink in the sight of him. “i missed you more, babe.” she assured him, beaming at the sight of the colorful flowers she loved so much. “i actually got you something too... come on” salem hummed, taking his hand to lead him back to the couch, hoping he wouldn’t be able to tell her hands were slightly colder than they usually were. she sat down and patted the spot next to hers, reaching inside the hoodie to take out the small box she had been fidgeting with as she waited for him to arrive, offering it to him. she could feel her heart thumping in her chest as she waited for his reaction, feeling it took him an eternity to undo the string that was tied into a bow around the box. 

for the first time in days, salem couldn’t tell for sure if the knot in her stomach was due to morning sickness or the fact that arlo was coming home. she usually hated being left alone, even when she was used to his career demanding him to travel often, she would pout and call him constantly and count the days until he was back. now, however, it seemed like good timing. salem knew what the news would mean for the male, and she wanted it to be a joyous occasion, which meant she needed time to find a nice way to tell him about it, instead of him finding a pregnancy test in the trash or waking up to salem bent over the toilet. so she sat on the couch, hoodie easily hiding her still petite frame and waited, feeling her heart jump slightly once the door opened. without having any control over it, salem’s features twisted into a wide smile as she got up from her seat and rushed towards him, wrapping both her arms and legs around him. “finally!” she nuzzled against his neck as a greeting.