Hello!

oh now Mr. Reverse Robin Hood is going to lecture us about wealth redistribution

One of the many benefits of being weird in public is possibly saving -- and definitely improving -- a stranger's life without ever knowing.

The funny thing about the Rocket Danger sirens is that the announcement they play after them is so ridiculously garbled that you have to lean reeeeeally close to the window and listen intently to make out "Do not approach windows"

It’s Fourth of July Eve so make sure to leave some milk and cookies out for Captain America

I THOUGHT AFTER FOUR YEARS YOU PEOPLE WOULD LET THIS DIE AND YET AGAIN I OPEN THIS CURSED APP TO FIND MORE NOTES ON THIS POST

Spent hours rolling around in pain in my bed barely conscious at all and found a few phrases occasionally floating into my head. I forget a few but one was "komaeda chipped black nail polish" and the other was "wilted lettuce killed me" and I get the first but. I haven't had lettuce (wilted or otherwise) for months if not years?

Alright so who's gonna write the story

the thing is that for all its supposed faults, i would take this brand of 90s utopian globalism over whatever the fuck we’ve been doing for the last 10 years in a heartbeat

I'm not necessarily rooting for the US in the world cup but I do think it would be funny if they made a deep run if only because I feel like, for countries that are actually good at international football, "You lost to the USAmericans" would make for god tier trash talk

Imagine you're from a country where this sport is like a national civic religion and you lose to a bunch of dork ass losers who call it soccer. There's no coming back from that

i support women doing things with their hair that make other people upset 🥰

and i extra support girls doing things with their hair that piss off every adult in the vicinity

In a world full of nanotech, lasers, and other high-tech dodads, you are the master of scrap works and "primitive" machines. You're also the most respected and feared engineer alive.

^^ free nicotine patches there

When my mom quit smoking, she was astounded by how fragrant flowers were and how good icing on cakes tasted because she could finally smell again. And she could sit through a movie in the theater without getting antsy.

Gross as it is, coughing the stuff out is also a hopeful thing. Do you remember the anti-smoking campaigns for years that included pictures of the gross tar-filled blackened lungs? Coughing the stuff out is literally your body reversing that process. Like, how cool and hopeful is that? Your body isn't holding a grudge and it isn't beyond repair, it's putting things to rights immediately and doing just what it is supposed to do.