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hey bb theres smo on twt hating on ur work, w the phrase “searched up ukyt and one of the first things that come up ” w their moots talking abt how it gets worse and so on. i’ll send you the photo of youd like.
damn i'm just trying to vibe, thanks for letting me know
Do you have any idea on how long the trapped series is going to be? Also do you have a tag list for it, it's literally the best thing I've ever read x 😙
Part 2 is out here!!!!!
im thinking of making it 7 parts, one for each day and maybe a part for life outside of the show
i hadn't thought about a tag list but ill look into it
alfie buttle x reader
summary: you and alfie get closer together, whilst playing monopoly and battleships
notes: hes so yummy, sorry it was a long wait 🙈
trapped masterlist
Day Two
7:43 AM
You woke up before alfie, thankfully your pillow idea had worked and you stayed on opposite sides of the bed all the way throughout the night
You would never admit it out loud but you found it comforting sharing the bed with alfie, it helped you realise you weren't alone for the whole week
Carefully you made your way out of the large double bed tiptoeing through the doorway to not wake up the muscular man, you quickly brushed your teeth before making your way to the diary room
"reader" the voice greeted, her voice as robotic as yesterday
"voice" you smiled still in your pyjamas and slippers "has my order come?" you questioned voice still groggy from only just waking up
"please open the front door" she responded and you giddily ran out of the room all tiredness leaving your body
You were an early riser and you could tell even from only knowing him a day, alfie was the opposite, you poked your head back into the bedroom seeing his unconscious body, mouth half open and soft snores coming from him made you let out a small giggle
When opening the door, you were a little disappointed you had one large banner, a couple sheets of paper and 2 felt tips
"are the sidemen not loaded, the fuck is this" you questioned pulling the items in and placing them on the nearby coffee table "get more from b&m with 5 quid, cant even afford 2 beds"
~
9:03 AM
Waiting for alfie to wake up and interact with you was possibly the longest and 'boringist' experience you've ever had, having no phone or access to social media was seeming harder than you originally anticipated
You found yourself making a cup of tea and taking a head start on your team banner, even coming up with a team name 'give us another bed', you first wrote it in bubble letters, something you've never been good at since your primary school days
But it looked horror so you flipped the banner over to start again due to only been given 1
Your second attempt was a lot better, cursive in pink, you knew this definitely wasn't alfie's vibe yet he was still sleeping, so he doesn't have a say
9:45 AM
"the shop is now open" the voice spoke, startling you almost making you smudge your writing "please make your way to the diary room"
You moved quickly, looking into alfie again, he'd moved position, duvet fallen down to the waistline of his joggers allowing you to see his very toned abs and chest, making you flush before you snapped out of it walking into the diary room
"so this is where the budget went" you laughed seeing the large tablet in the corner showing multiple items up for grabs
"all teams have access to these items" the feminine robot told you, nodding as you scrolled through the items, chess board for arthur, guiness for beano, monster for alfie
You contemplated for a moment looking at the point rankings 4 for reader and AB, 2 for Bach and Beano and 2 for Danny and Arthur, you assume they had, had an extra challenge like you
The monster cost 1 point and you were already up by 2, you thought against it deciding to attempt to wake alfie up instead
~
10:03 AM
"alfie" you touched his shoulder, pushing him lightly whilst whispering "AB" you tried again when he didn't move, even going as far as to prod his cheek "its 10"
He didn't make any noise just turning to the other side away from you
"right" you sighed "can i confirm one white monster please" you spoke whilst looking at the camera "how much sleep does one man need" you groaned leaving the room again making your way back to your banner
Your monopoly board was still on the floor untouched since the night before, your eyes lit up at the sight a thought forming in your head, alfie still asleep and he owns 2 hotels on the board
You quickly removed 1 of the hotels pocketing it before you got caught, even though it was only the two of you in the flat, you giggled to yourself before opening the front door and seeing your ordered monster
~
10:18 AM
"alfie" you nudged him again receiving no response, you cheekily moved your hand holding the cooled can, placing it on the exposed side of his neck he immediately flinched
"what the fuck" he moved away, hand cradling his neck eyes softening a bit when he saw it was only you
"its 10" you giggled at his reaction "I've been trying to wake you for ages"
"its way too early girl, come back to sleep" he pulled the duvet down on your side trying to coerce you back into the large bed
"half of the days basically gone" you argued "got you a present if you get out of bed" you hid the monster behind your back smiling suspiciously at the larger man "please, I've made our banner" you pleaded again as he sat up properly, hair a mess and eyes threatening to shut again
"better not be ketchup or some shit" he looked at you as you walked backwards out of the room almost tripping over his open unpacked suitcase making him laugh and run and hand through his hair
~
10:26 AM
By the time alfie had made himself look semi-presentable, brushed his teeth and smoothed his bed head as much as he could, you had already left his monster on the kitchen island with a note made from your newly acquired paper and pens
to alfie
from your new roomate, reader :)
He hadn't bothered getting changed yet, since you were still pyjama clad yourself, with your bunny slippers on, alfie could admit he thought you were majorly attractive especially with the bunny slippers
"this is so cute" he smiled when he saw the can and note causing you to blush and laugh, since he hadn't bothered changing he was still shirtless making you incredibly flustered just by looking at him
"it did cost a point" you sighed "but were still one ahead, so thats good" you pointed out as he cracked open the can
"ill savour it then"
~
10:59 AM
"let me see your banner" alfie asked slowly sipping on his drink waiting for your grand reveal "is that our name?" he laughed when he saw the cursive writing
"yeah" you smiled "they basically sent us nish" you gestured to the rest of the items on the table
"ask for a tree, they send a branch" alfie attempted a joke but only resulted in a cringed out face from the two of you
~
11:31 AM
By 11 you and alfie had both changed into day clothes, alfie was obviously repping the young LA clothes he always had, whilst you were just in plain jeans and a halter neck trying to combat the heat of the flat, since the sidemen had obviously forgot to install air con
"you want me to make some eggs?" AB questioned as he turned the hob on
"please" you smiled before looking back at what you could add to your banner "you think Arthur got his chess set?" you referenced the shop
"probably" alfie concentrated on his eggs "man cant live a day without playing, probably brought one with him" he laughed
"wonder what they'll add for me" you thought aloud whilst adding some stick figures of you and alfie to the banner
"well what's your favourite thing, like ever" he recalled your question from yesterday
"mhm" you pondered putting your pen down looking over at the muscular man "my bunny or cat, they're staying with my mum right now"
"nah, you have a bunny and a cat" alfie laughed "is your cat not a scrappy one?"
"oh she is, I have to keep them separate in my flat, its so sad" you saw him laughing over the oven "what's so funny?"
"can just imagine, you inbetween them fighting, like theyre your kids"
~
1:05 PM
"duos, please open your front door" voices robotic voice greeted you again, you and alfie were quick to race towards the door, him ultimately winning due to speed but you would argue he was closer
His large frame in the doorway did block your view of the outside causing more anticipation from you on what was on the other side
"fuck off" he grunted carrying in a large metal frame with Velcro stuck on it, your view was still blocked only seeing the work of his biceps and arms
"oh were playing battleships" you realised noticing the ships and x placeholders "im sick at this" you promised
"ill hold you to that"
~
1:45 PM
The first game was between Danny and Arthur vs Bach and Beano, voice lets you and alfie know that Danny and Arthur won, receiving 1 point
The second game is between you and alfie vs Beano and Bach
"we should go for the edges" you tell alfie looking at the large board in front of you
"okay yeah" alfie starts moving your ships placing some near the edges, some in the centre "good?" he questioned
"perfect" you highfived him waiting for the other team to confirm they were ready "whilst were waiting" you started turning to him with a grin "will you pretty please hang the banner up" you held up some tape you found hidden under the sink
"yeah girl, where'd you want it" his wording made him immediately laugh, you catching on and turning red as well as he covered his face
"above the sofa" you answered, watching him move still giggling at what he said whilst music started playing, signalling the other team were ready "alfie alfie" you shouted into the living room, observing as he ran back jumping off the sofa, leaving the banner half falling down
"reader and AB please go first" voice spoke from the speakers in the corner of the room
"go in the middle?" AB pointed at a spot looking to you for a nod "C3"
"miss" Beano's strong accent flooded the room, the only real voice aside from alfie's you'd heard in the last 24 hours
As the game progressed more coordinates were called out
"D2" - miss
"A2" - hit
"F4" - miss
"E5" - miss
"A1" - hit
"E2" - miss
You and AB took lead hitting 3 of their ships whilst they only had 1
"used to play this on snapchat games" you told alfie whilst placing one of the hits on the board "rip" he let out a laugh before pointing at an empty spot on the board
"they've probably gone there" he presumed noticing it was the only large space left on the board
You listened to him
"C3" - miss
"C1" - miss
"B4" - miss
"B1" - miss
"A4" - miss
Beano and Bach's laugh was deafening as they announced the outcome of your choice's
"what the fuck" alfie exclaimed watching as the board filled with miss after miss and bach and beanos kept hitting again and again
"they've gone down here" you pointed to the bottom of the board where the 6 line was, completely unoccupied, you still had 2 ships left to get, whilst bach and beano only needed 1
"we're so dumb" alfie laughed pacing around the flat head in hands
"D1" bachs voice flooded the room resulting in a groan from both you and alfie
"hit"
~
2:07 PM
You lost the game against bach and beano resulting in them earning a point
"i thought i was good" you smiled sadly referencing your earlier comment
"next game" alfie promised taking another small sip of his monster, having half the can left
"let me have some" you asked "need the advantage" he laughed and you thought he was about to hand you the can but he held it to you lips using his other hand to tilt your head back, your face flushed as you swallowed
"thanks" you mumbled watching his smile turn cheeky, smiling at your confusion
"AB and reader, please reset your board" voice asked you and alfie, immediately moving to replace your ships and face arthur and danny
"different tactic?" you asked alfie receiving a nod
You and alfie were very happy with the placement of ships, you'd gone differently to last time, they were more centrally placed
"A2" Arthur's voice came through the speakers
"ha miss" alfie responded jumping around the room
"D6" - hit
"F3" - miss
"B1" - miss
"E3" - hit
"F5" - miss
Again you took the lead against tv and aarons by the time they had hit 2 ships, you had hit 4 only needing one more hit to win the point
"we're gonna win" you exclaimed to alfie feeling cocky
"yeah girl" he grabbed your shoulders and shook you making you giggle
"B6" you spoke loud enough so the mics could hear you
"hit" danny's voice felt saddened and you and alfie ran around the flat screaming, so loud the others could probably hear you on the other floors
~
2:23 PM
You and alfie went to the diary room after your win, looking at the updated score board it was obvious people had bought things bringing their scores down
AB and reader - 4
Bach and Beano - 1
Arthur and Danny - 3
"still in the lead" alfie flexed his arms at the camera
"did bach and beano spend all their points" you laughed
"probably bought something period related" ab looked at the camera "girls ew" you pulled a face at him
"ill just fuck off then"
~
3:02 PM
"what do you wanna eat" you asked alfie whilst you lounged on the sofa, near but not quite touching "burgers?" you didn't let him answer jumping up off the sofa to the kitchen
"no ketchup" he demanded
"you have such a shit pallet, have Sabina and chip not cultured you"
"i like what i like" he smirked still drinking his monster
"does that not taste old yet?"
"its liquid gold"
~
4:15 PM
"reader" voice started in the diary room "how would you rate AB's cooking"
"10/10 for the gesture" you smiled "if i could have a man make me eggs every morning i would" you looked towards the door "flavour wise, 6/10, i don't know why that boys so afraid of flavours"
"AB" voice had kicked you out of the room instead brining your partner in "how would you rate readers cooking"
"10/10 i cant lie, this whole experience is a fever dream, got a rocket in my bed, making me burgers and telling me she owns a bunny named fluffy" AB raised his can to the camera "thank you sidemen"
~
4:46 PM
"should we buy Arthur's chess board?" you asked laying on the floor staring at the ceiling
"why?"
"piss him off" you laughed "just imagine him pacing 'im a grandmaster, i play chess'" you put on your best jersey accent "he taught me how to play"
"go on then" alfie watched you jump up and go to the diary room to confirm your purchase before looking to the floor where your abandoned monopoly game was "oi where the fuck is my hotel?"
~
5:05 PM
"you know what would bang right now?" alfie leant against the kitchen island "other than having my hotel back"
"i didn't take your hotel" you lied receiving a look from him
"toasted marshmallows" you let out a hum at his suggestion
~
5:17 PM
"so you live by yourself in the grotto?" you asked alfie "no pets?"
"nah, my mum has 2 dogs nearby, Pablo and Chica" he told you
"that's so cute, i would say they can meet my pets but i don't think that would end well" you laughed at the thought of your feisty cat and the two dogs going at each other
"buns would be in trouble" he joked
"she can fight" you promised
"feisty bunny"
~
5:41 PM
"gonna have a shower to kill time" you announced making your way to the bathroom
"ight" alfie responded shaking his monster can "last sip" he held it out to you
"you gonna let me do it myself?" you asked making the muscular man blush watching as he stood up and made his way over to you, he placed his hand on your chin lifting your head up as he pour the remains of the drink down your throat, it felt weirdly intimate compared to last time but in a good way
"your welcome" he took the can away from your lips before wiping the excess of your lips
~
5:55 PM
"your boys dropping game on a sidemen shoot" AB laughed into the camera in the diary room "think its working" he smirked
~
7:04 PM
By this point in the evening you and AB had both showered and were feeling insanely bored
"duos" voice's robotic voice blasted through the speakers "tonight a secret challenge will be taking place" you and alfie looked at each other in shock "please open your front door"
You both shot up, alfie beating you to the door again he opened the door to see nothing, absolutely nothing
"is there suppose to be something?" you questioned only receiving a shrug from AB
"only one duo has received the challenge" voice confirmed
"bet you its bach and beano" alfie looked at you
"tenner?" you held out your hand
~
7:07 PM
"bach and beano" voice said in their diary room, similar to yours but coloured differently "you have been chosen for the secret challenge" bach rubbed his hands together as beano stuck out his tongue
"we are honoured" bach knelt in front of the camera bowing to the voice
"your challenge is to sabotage one of the other duos"
"sabotage reader or danny aarons" beano's face was conflicted as he looked to bach
"can't do arthur and danny, gotta think about the pod" he spoke seriously making beano nod in agreement
Beano's hand reached out and hit a giant red button in front of the pair labelled reader opposed to the one on the right labelled danny
~
7:33 PM
"im all nervous and giddy now" alfie spoke jumping around the flat again
"we can" you thought about it for a moment "play monopoly"
"gonna give me back my hotel?" he asked walking over to you
"you know i don't even think you ever had one" you tried to lie but a smile ended up on your face
"nah girl give it" he pleaded "do i have to pat you down or some shit" he laughed raising his hand
"fine fine" you reached into your pocket feeling the hotel which you had transferred from your pyjamas when you got changed however you didn't pull it out, just giving him the bird
"nah your fucked" alfie laughed
"ill put my pyjamas on then we can play" you skipped away from him into the bedroom to receive your clothes as well as hide the hotel under his pillow
~
7:45 PM
"stop" alfie yelled when he landed on your property again "gonna flip this board in a minute, his shirt was long discarded due to the rising heat in the flat
"50 please" you held out your hand
"nah you still owe me my hotel" he shook his head "were even"
~
9:00 PM
"didn't make any other posters" alfie noticed looking at the half hung up banner from the floor where the monopoly board was
"i can do it tomorrow whilst your still asleep" you laughed
"that was a one time thing" he promised "ill be up bright and early tomorrow, before you"
"im sure"
~
9:46 PM
"so you do the fellas pod with chip and cal" you asked looking in the freezer for the small pint of ice cream you'd been given, forgetting about monopoly after AB complained about how much money he was giving you
"you're looking at the 3rd host" he took 2 spoons out of the draw, handing one over to you
"gonna have me on?" you asked "throw me some promo"
"depends how this goes" he laughed both of you shovelling ice cream out of the tub at the same time
~
10:05 PM
"done nothing and im so tired" you told alfie
"we played a very tiring game of battleships and almost bought a chess set to piss off arthur" he washed the spoons in the sink "we've had a long day"
"are you sponsored by young LA or something?" you asked randomly looking at his outfit "all your clothes are from there"
"code AB" he looked at the camera with a wink "myprotein too"
~
10:30 PM
"i fear only a doom scroll could save me from sleep right now" you laughed
"someone at tiktok is getting fired for this" he imitated one of those ad's you get every 5 videos from the kitchen whilst you laid on the sofa
~
10:45 PM
"what would you spend the money on?" alfie asked receiving no response, moving to look at you properly finding you fast asleep on the sofa, he stood there for a moment before placing his hands underneath you, and carrying you into your shared bed and pulling the duvet up over you
"better not clip this" he mumbled to himself before getting in his side only to find something hard under his pillow "fuck off" he laughed
User1: so excited to see what bach and beano do
ItalianBach: reader, im not sorry 🫢
-> Yourusername: you will be 🤜
User2: 24:03 that is arthur in readers body
DannyAarons: so i wasn't in this vid then?
Yourusername: what hotel?
User3: Hows AB done that then
-> User4: dont even think he knows readers name
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
alfie buttle x reader
summary: you and a stranger are forced to live together for a week with no contact to the outside world
notes: someone help me with a team name pls
trapped masterlist
Day One
11:45 AM
Your suitcase was heavy and way too full, the zip was threatening to re-open with every stair you climbed, the apartment building was large and full of cameras but you expected nothing less from the sidemen
Your friend Tobi had begged for you to be in their most recent video due to someone pulling out last minute, all you knew about said video was living with a stranger for a week and competing with 2 other duos to complete the most challenges successfully earning points for your team
You weren't a stranger to sidemen videos, you'd been in multiple over the years, leading to a major growth in your YouTube channel, where you posted weekly vlogs about your day to day life
"Thought you guys were meant to be loaded" you deadpanned the camera nearby as you lugged your suitcase up the stairs "cant afford a bloody lift"
You eventually reached the floor of your flat for the week, the door labelled 208 was unlocked, thankfully as you hadn't received any keys
The living room was large enough for a 3 seater cream sofa with a small coffee table placed in front and a large tv which seemed to have no remote
"You definitely skimped out on this one" you walked towards the kitchen opening the draws and cupboards to see 2 bowls, 2 plates and 2 pairs of knives and forks "definitely a second channel vid"
You continued to snoop before the letter box in the front door opened and shut with a clang dropping a single envelope on the floor, you hurried over quick to read the secret document
The front of the envelope read 'for readers eyes only' you quickly ripped it open not caring to save the envelope
"Reader, your new roomate will be arriving in 2 minutes, your first challenge is to scare them upon arrival" you laughed at the note before quickly moving to behind the front door where they would enter it was a boring place to hide but it was the first place you saw
The wait for the door to open felt way longer than it was due to the anticipation, you didn't know who to expect, you knew majority of the people in the uk YouTube scene partially due to how many sidemen videos you had appeared in
When the door opened you barely had chance to look at the figure entering before you screamed making them jump
"Fuck off" a large man said holding his hand over his heart "nearly gave me a heart attack" his voice was rough compared to yours
"Sorry" you laughed "it was my first challenge" your voice was sincere despite your laughter at his reaction "i'm reader" you held out your hand finally taking the mans apparence in
He obviously worked out regularly, he was a large man with his curly brown hair cut recently into a mullet, and a pair of coloured sunglasses covering his eyes, you wouldn't lie he was very attractive
"AB" he responded taking your hand and making a weak attempt at eye contact without blushing "have you been here long?" he questioned moving to look around the flat
"Just got here, cupboards are practically empty" you warned as he moved to the kitchen, leaving his suitcase near the front door next to yours
"It's nice though" he spoke turning back around to you "bit small for the sidemen" he laughed opening the fridge to see its empty
"That's what I was thinking" you smiled "so what kind of content do you make?" you asked wanting to get to know the man more
"Just do vlogs really" he laughed to himself
"Me too" you exclaimed "this is gonna be easy we've got so much in common already"
"Have you seen the bedrooms yet?" AB asked walking down the hallway you'd yet to discover
"No I've only had time to look around the kitchen" you confessed following him to the other side of the flat
The two of you stood outside 3 doors one labelled 'diary room' and when you opened the other two you found a bathroom and a bedroom containing a double bed
"One room" AB spoke slowly unsure of what to do in the awkward environment "one bed"
"Thats one way to break the tension" you laughed feeling slightly nervous to share a bed with the 6 foot man
~
12:15 PM
Later in the diary room you sat there in silence, looking around the room unsure what to do, AB or Alfie as he said you could call him had already done his first interview so now it was your turn
"Reader, how do you like the flat" a voice spoke making you jump a little
"It's very nice, were lacking a bit on basic necessities like food" you shifted in the chair trying to get comfortable "but overall, its nice"
"How do you like your new roommate?" the feminine robotic voice asked its tone remaining consistent
"He's great, seems like a good guy, im presuming we have 2 very different fan bases which will be interesting considering we do similar things" you truthfully looked into the camera, a smile making its way to your face
"Please return to the living room, your first challenge awaits"
~
12:25 PM
"AB and reader, this is your first official challenge together" you read from the card on the kitchen counter "you will be competing against the 2 other duos, so you need to try your best" you slid the card over to AB allowing him to read the rest
"You will be participating in the blind, deaf challenge, the blind participant must do all physical aspects of the challenge, the team who wins will receive 3 points" he read out making you laugh "please open your front door"
"Sounds like a torture method" you moved to the front door finding numerous ingredients, noise cancelling headphones and a blindfold
"I'm shit at baking" Alfie confessed holding his hands up "so i'll let you be in charge" he stepped back
"Okay, so do you wanna be blindfolded, so I can see?" you asked handing him the blindfold
"How the fuck do you tie this?" he struggled holding the black cloth around his eyes struggling to secure it on
"Lean down" you giggled moving to help the man
He complied quickly moving down to help you reach near his eyes
"You're actually tiny" Alfie told you now completely blind after you tied the back of the cloth into a knot
"Compared to you, who isn't" you organised all ingredients out onto the counter before placing your headphone on top of your head "I presume we're suppose to be making cupcakes" you assumed looking at what's in front of you
"Okay I can do that" AB hyped himself up forgetting you cant hear him "what do I do now?" he waited for your response "oh fuck, you cant hear" he laughed at himself
"So" you started talking at a volume way too loud for unprotected ears "im gonna hand you the ingredients i just need you to pour it into the bowl in front of you"
"Can do" he responded taking the first packet off you and tipping it upside down
"Great, that was really good" you praised "okay now the milk, be careful yeah" you grabbed his hand to carefully pass him the liquid, the constant contact with you made his face flush not use to this much physical touch "now the egg, can I help do you think that's allowed?" you questioned not wanting him to smash the egg everywhere
"not sure girl" alfie responded forgetting again you cant hear
"ill just guide your hand" you spoke taking his hand again and gently cracking the egg on the side of the bowl "were doing so good" you held your hand up to high five the man eventually noticing he cant see and moving his hand to hit yours "mixing time" without your guidence alfies hands plunged into the unmixed dough
"Ugh, that's a horrible feeling when you cant see it" he complained with a laugh
Eventually everything was mixed to your standards and you and Alfie had somehow managed to put the mixture into a tray and now you had to put it in the oven
"Okay move this way" you placed your hands on Alfie's waist trying to manoeuvre him around the kitchen "stop" he stopped moving in front of the oven and you lowered him till he placed it inside "done" you took your headphones off and he removed his blindfold
"That was easy" he high-fived you again "we've got this in the bag"
"I don't even know what the challenge was, fastest?" you questioned as it wasn't mentioned on the card
"We were rapid to be fair"
~
12:45 PM
The cupcakes had come out the oven perfectly, you jumped up and down in happiness
"AB please come to the diary room" the voice from above spoke and he swiftly moved to the room down the hallway whilst you moved to sit on the sofa
"The smell is making me hella hungry" you admitted to no one in particular hearing your stomach rumble
"AB how did you find the challenge?" the voice asked and AB sighed
"Gyal got a bit touchy, not that I minded she's an absolute rocket" he confessed holding his hands up jokingly
"Where do you think you've placed?"
"Easy number one" Alfie admitted "reader was great at directing i was great at listening for once, we had great teamwork"
~
1:20 PM
The two of you had to wait presumably for the other teams to finish their baking, you passed time by talking about your lives outside of social media
"What would you say is your favourite thing?" you asked looking at the man sat next to you lounging on the sofa "like ever"
"Uh" he thought about it for a minute "probably my house down in the woods, called the grotto, i love it" he smiled at you "white monster is very close second though"
"That makes sense" you told him truthfully "you seem like a wilderness guy"
"Got a gaff in London too, don't rate it as much though" he explained before asking his question "if you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?"
"I like Australia, I've always wanted to go" you answer quickly "its always hot and has sunny beaches"
"That's not a bad shout" Alfie responded before he was cut off by the voice
"Players, the results have been decided" you and Alfie both perked up "in last place with 1 point is Arthur tv and Danny Aarons" you and Alfie looked at each other with hope "in first place with 3 points is AB and reader, AB and reader combined with readers successful challenge earlier you have 4 points total"
"Oh my gosh" you exclaimed moving off the sofa to jump in celebration
"Lets fucking go"
~
3:25 PM
"I'm so hungry" you told Alfie as you leaned on the kitchen counter
"Yeah when are they actually giving us food" he took a sip from his water bottle "it must be like illegal not to right"
"Surely" you agreed "had to hand in our winning cupcakes" you laughed
~
4:05 PM
"AB and reader please open your front door" the voice told you and you quickly moved racing Alfie to the door
Obviously he reached it first the handle almost flying off the door as he pulled the door open
"Food" you exclaimed happily as AB brought a variety of foods forwards "this will last us ages" it was just the basics, nothing fancy or particularly exciting, you were just super hungry
"Could be a worse selection i guess" he deadpanned the camera "don't know how i'll survive without a monster"
~
7:55 PM
Later you and AB had both made seperate meals but ate together at the kitchen island
"I'm excited for the rest of the challenges" you told him whilst blowing on your tomato soup looking at him a few feet away
"They're gonna throw in some twists, gotta keep it entertaining" Alfie responded
"Yeah I agree" you started "we should have a team name"
"You think?" Alfie questioned with a laugh watching you take small spoonful's of your soup
"We could make a team banner and everything" your eyes glistened with the possibilities whilst AB just laughed with you "im serious, this flat is so boring, we need decorations especially if were here for a full week"
"I get you, it is a bit bleak in here" he looked to the plain walls around you trying to imagine some nice prints or paintings
~
8:30 PM
"Voice" you greeted in the diary room trying to squeeze onto the small chair with Alfie
"Is that what were calling her, voice?" he asked with a giggle
"What else would you call her?" you retorted "anyways, we would like to request lots of paper, pens, paint and a banner"
"A whole trees worth pretty please" Alfie added staring into the camera "this is the only thing we will ask for"
"Ever" you promised with uncertainty holding your pinkie out to the screen
"Your request will arrive tomorrow" the familiar robotic voice answered making you light up in excitement as you looked up towards the speaker
"This is gonna be so good" you promised Alfie finally looking back at him and watching him mog the camera "trust me"
"I'm trusting" AB moved to fix his hair in the reflection of the camera lens
~
9:00 PM
"Who are the other teams again?" you asked Alfie, you two back in the living room again, you were trying to prolong going to bed as the thought of the two of you sharing made you super nervous
"Bach and Beano" he tried to recall from what the voice said earlier in the day "tv and Danny Aarons"
"I think Arthur and Danny are the biggest threat to us" you confessed "they're probably being super serious about the competition, well Arthur anyway"
The video flashed back to the previous challenge and the absolute carnage caused by the two youtubers, screaming, shouting and the mess they ended up having to clean
"I'm the only girl" you realised "so we have to win or the sidemen hate women" you smirked into the camera making Alfie laugh
Due to the late time you had both changed into your night clothes, you had your cute satin pyjamas whilst Alfie was just in a white tank top and grey joggers, a deadly combo
"FYI I can only sleep shirtless" he confessed when your conversation flattened out making you raise your eyebrows
"Right okay" you responded "fuck I forgot there is only one bed" you looked up at him
"I can sleep here" he patted the sofa making you instantly wince, it wasn't the comfiest thing ever, his back would be ruined in the morning
"That's actual cruelty, we can just stay on opposite sides of the bed" you told him, not wanting to cause him any unnecessary pain
~
9:45 PM
"Why the flip have you only got one bed" you looked into the camera "I hope every team is getting this treatment"
"Every team is getting the same treatment" the robotic voice confirmed for you
The video moved from you to AB in the diary room
"Nah, this is bout to be bare awkward, known reader for what 10-12 hours and shes gonna see me with my mouth tape, games gone"
"You sure you don't want me on the sofa?" Alfie asked for what seemed like the thousandth time not wanting to make you uncomfortable, his shirt was long discarded but you weren't complaining
"I'm 100% sure" you confirmed moving onto the large bed "its big enough for 3 people anyway and we can do the barrier method" you giggled at your own suggestion grabbing two spare pillows and placing it in between you two
"Cant even hit a doom scroll" AB spoke the sadness apparent in his voice as he laid next to you in the bed "way too early for sleep"
"We can play a game" you suggested sitting up to look at him over the pillow "I brought monopoly in my case"
"As long as I can be the dog" he sat up, his hair at the back flattening down due to the pillow
~
11:45 PM
You were struggling to keep your eyes open as you moved his piece around the edge of the board, you were almost 2 hours in and neither of you were close to winning or losing
"Ha you owe me 150" Alfie told you leaning back on his elbows on the wooden floor, accentuating his arm muscles in the best way which your eyes immediately drifted to
"Ugh" you groaned leaning over to pass him the monopoly paper, a yawn leaving your mouth
"You tired?" his voice softened as he asked the question
"A bit" you responded passing him the dice fighting off another yawn
"We can go bed if you want?" his accent came through a bit more making you laugh and nod
User1: justice for Beano and Bach
ABvloggin: that guy with the blindfold mogs everyone
-> ArthurFrederick: thanks man
User2: reader is so cringe
-> User3: faceless profile shut up
User4: can't wait for next sunday!
DannyAarons: never thought making cupcakes was so hard
alfie buttle x reader
summary: the sidemen introduce their new reality show
trapped masterlist
The seven sidemen stood in a line starting the video off with all of them together
"welcome to trapped" Simon spoke from the middle of the line looking directly into the camera
"we took 6 youtubers, paired them up and locked them together in an apartment for 1 whole week" Tobi smirked and the video moved to clips of the 6 participants
The video moved to Danny Aarons "I left my kid for this man" he looked into one of the cameras in the corner, it moved again to Arthur tv trying to open one flat's door yet unable to "oh wrong one?" he questioned when it wouldn't open, moving to open another one of the fake doors
Eventually the video moved to you sat in what looked like the big brother diary room "we're lacking the basic necessities like food" you were sat crossed legged on the chair trying to get comfy
"The pairs will have to face challenges, competing against each other for points" Harry spoke in his usual tone making the other boys smile
The video moved to AB blindfolded with his hands in some dough whilst you tried to move him but ultimately failed due to his size compared to yours
"they will face hard choices and decisions that will affect the rest of their gameplay" Josh added talking with his hands
The video now showed Beano sat in the diary room "sabotage reader or Danny Aarons" he looked conflicted before pressing a big red sabotage button on his right
"or their relationships" Vik contributed
"what the fuck" AB raised his voice whilst sat in the diary room with a confused look on his face
"they're all in competition for £10,000" JJ told the camera with a smile "which will either be split or shared among the wining duo"
"don't make me choose" the video showed Italian Batch begging the hidden camera as Beano walked through the frame in the background
"let the games commence" Ethan concluded the short teaser clapping as the video shut off
User1: this looks so peak
User2: not having arthur and batch pairing is insane
GeorgeClarkey: Arthur wtf
User3: Reader and AB is about to be generational
Arthur_Frederick: done me dirty there
User4: Beano and Batch period pain diss track!!!!!
Yourusername: finally!!! I had so much fun filming this
angry ginge x Reader
summary: every time ginge's Mrs has featured in a vid or stream
Masterlist
it was late at night, and you were sat in your and morgan's shared bedroom waiting for him to finish streaming, you were bored out of your mind wishing he could hurry up so you could order your tea
you could only think of one thing to cure your boredom, a doom scroll which you chose to do via TikTok, surprisingly the first video you saw when you opened the app mentioned you, it was a hefty video around 15 minutes long so you automatically put it into 2x speed
0:15
the first clip came after a small intro titled reader and her features, the clip was from the 'first to find angry ginge' video and started with jakey pulling out his phone and making a call with max khadar stood next to him
"pick up" jakey spoke into the ringing phone whilst moving his newly bought bucket hat onto his head
"hello, jakey?" you questioned looking at the younger man on the facetime call "you alright?"
"reader" jakey greeted smiling "we're filming at the moment and we've lost ginge, dont suppose you have his location" he tried pulling a serious face but a smirk was still evident
"you what" you looked into the phone confused "wait a minute, i'll call you back"
the video moved from jakey and max to ginge in the back of an uber ending a phone call with tays and AB to answer your call
"morgan?" you spoke as he answered the call
"hiya love" his appearance caught you off guard but it wasn't the most random thing you'd ever seen him wear, the blacked out sunglasses and camo hat wasn't the worst combo "i'm just filming at the moment" he moved the phone towards his go pro
"jakey rang me" you confessed watching a smirk form on his face
"what a cheat" he scoffed with a laugh "they're trying to find me for the video, what a fucking loser" he held the go pro up again "this is why no one likes you jakey, always ruining the video"
"stop being horrible" you scolded through the phone moving around the house
"can you please tell him i'm on the tram" the smirk on his face was so large it made you giggle
"will do, do you still want burgers for tea?" you asked looking in the fridge at your options
"yeah thanks love" he ended the phone call and stared directly into his camera "fuck you jakey davis"
the clip moved back to jakey "we've got a hint that ginge is on the tram"
~
1:12
the next clip was from the 'helping ginge find love' video, it was a clip from the first few minutes of the video where the boys thought it was funny to call you and ask your opinion on the video
"hello reader" tays spoke holding the phone in the middle of the other bov boys excluding morgan who sat in the other room watching through the camera "your on speaker right now"
"hiya mikey, what's up?" you asked whilst curling your hair in the mirror at home
"we're filming a video called helping ginge find love" beano's thick voice travelled through the phone
"you fucking what" your voice raised and you set your curling wand down next to you, all you heard in response was giggles from the rest of the boys "are you taking the piss?"
"it was his idea as well" jakeys spoke watching as ginge entered the room quickly
"stop fucking lying" morgan spoke walking over to the phone "reader love its just for content" he tried to soften the blow
"it better be" you hung up not wanting the hear anymore
the clip continued showing ginge chasing jakey around the room and quickly catching him and tackling him to the ground muttering a dickhead under his breath
~
2:03
the clip was from the 'lie detector' video where you made an in person appearance at the end after watching behind the scenes all day
"why did I agree to this" you mumbled as the man hooked you up to the detector
"you got something to be nervous about reader?" tays asked from the sofa behind you
"i just know your gonna get me to say something horrible" you confessed rubbing your hands on your jeans
you hadn't planned to be apart of the video, so they had no pre planned questions for you, so the boys were asking the questions themselves
"i'll start" jakey spoke from one side of the sofa "who's the most famous person in your dm's?" the boys responded with an ooh as your face heated up
"does morgan count?" the two of you had been together since you'd left school but he often still responded to your stories with some cheesy pick up line
the boys allowed your answer yet the man pulled a face
"what have I been saying the whole video" he spoke from behind the laptop and you knew your answer had been a lie
"the truth will set you free" they spoke from sofa in between giggles
"tell the truth reader" chazza spoke from the back of the sofa
"doesn't matter" ginge spoke "i'm the only one that fucking matters anyway" you nodded at his response moving on
morgan was next to ask you a question "who is your least favourite bov boy?"
"uh chazza" your answer was slow and surprising to the boys
"a strong pass" the man thumbs up your answer making morgan belt out a laugh
"reader what the fuck" chazza spoke "i thought we were good mates"
"we are, i don't dislike any of you" you spoke truthfully pulling an extremely apologetic face towards the blonde "can I change my answer" you asked looing at his face receiving another laugh from morgan
"reader" beano started after taking the longest time to think of a question "have you ever thought about cheating on ginge"
"no no no" you spoke quickly and honestly waiting for the guy to tell you if you were telling the truth
"true, well done" the man smiled and you let out a sigh of relief
"okay i'm done now" you laughed going to take off the wires attached to you "those were not nice questions"
"oi you still have two left" tays stood not yet asking his question but you had already de-wired yourself
"too late" you laughed as morgan hugged you and you moved out of frame
~
4:43
the next clip was from morgans 24 hour stream he did a few months ago, it was around 2AM whilst he was asleep, you remember that night you had been tossing and turning asleep in your bed without him, yet sleep wouldn't come to you
you found yourself moving to his streaming room your blanket wrapped around your shoulders and your slippers on your feet
"hi chat" you greeted as you entered frame "cant sleep" you mumbled crouching down to lay next to your boyfriend
"reader?" he questioned his eyes opening at the new noise
"missed you, i couldn't sleep" he laughed opening his arms to you the chat awing at the action
you crawled into his arms and pulled the duvet up over you, leaning into him and closing your eyes
~
5:23
the next clip was the 'secret Santa' video the boys had filmed, you laughed when you saw morgan dressed as Santa on your screen
"is this mine, is it?" morgan spoke with the Santa voice he was putting on, ripping apart the red Christmas wrapping paper
it was a box but the product name wasn't facing him until he turned it around, a laugh came from chazza next to him but he just held a serious expression
"this isn't really for me then is it?" he questioned showing the camera the box containing a vibrator
the rest of the boys burst out laughing and beano took it from his hands
"nah reader will love this, its pink and everything" he laughed examining the box "its a shared gift" he insinuated wiggling his eyebrows
"i guess she knew she was getting this" he recalled to earlier in the morning when you said you were excited to see what he got with a suspicious look on your face
unknowingly tays nodded from besides ginge with a smirk on his face making jakey laugh
~
6:32
the next short clip was from the bov house announcement vid where you made a small cameo
it started with morgan alone in bed his hand subconsciously moving to reach for you, not noticing your absence, the loud noise from beano's room made him quickly sit up before looking to your side to see you absent
"oh he's taking the fucking piss"
the video followed ginge to beano's room where you and him were having a dance party and drinking buzz balls
"its 3AM can you shut the fuck up?" he angrily spoke
"awh don't be like that" beano spoke followed by you trying to pass morgan a blue buzz ball
"no I've had enough" he moved to switch the flashing lights off "stop stealing my girlfriend and get out" he grabbed your hand as he walked out of the room
~
7:08
the midway clip of the video was from the 'stranded in the uk' vid when chazza and ginge were in the back of this mans car whilst he was giving them a lift
"can I borrow your phone to ring my Mrs mate?" morgan asked receiving a yes from the driver
"gonna get reader to pick us up?" chazza asked looking at the ginger man
"exactly, thank you mate"
"another bloke who's got your girlfriends number" chazza commented "everyone's got it" morgan let out a major laugh
"stop taking the piss" he turned serious "she's not gonna answer, gonna have to call her five times"
"hello" you answered sceptically not knowing who had called you multiple times
"hiya love" morgan greeted "you alright?" he didn't wait for you to answer "you know how we're filming a video, we're stranded and I've not got me phone, where are you at the minute?"
"i'm at your mums" you responded "what do you want?" you asked impatiently receiving a laugh from chazza "hi chaz"
"how far are you from akrinson train station" morgan asked not allowing chazza to respond in sake of time
"hang on" you exited WhatsApp moving to google maps "its nearly 2 hours from me"
"fuck off" he exclaimed loudly through the phone
"oi" you scolded "i'll hang up on you in a minute, 2 hours by train"
"what about by car?" morgan asked laughing at you
"35 minutes, if your gonna ask me to pick you up, im gonna need something in return" you negotiated looking at morgan's mum with a smirk
"bloody hell if you wanted a shag just ask" he joked wiggling his eyebrows at the camera, a smile present as he waited for your response
"ew no" you grimaced "i need a 45 minute foot massage tonight" you added "please"
"perfect can you set off now?" he asked shaking his head at the camera and mouthing 'absolutely not'
"yeah just give me a few, need to get some petrol" you spoke moving to put on your shoes
"reader" chazza quickly spoke before ginge hung up "will you get me some strawberry laces" he begged resulting in a dirty look from ginge
"are you taking the piss"
"yeah can do, bye love you morgan" you smiled making note to go inside the shop whilst there
"love you bye bye" he hung up handing the phone back to the man "just don't be calling my girl on the weekend"
~
9:21
the next clip was from later in the same video
"chaz" you rolled down the window passing him his strawberry laces before looking at ginge and passing him a redbull "your welcome"
"thanks love" he moved to kiss you through the car window having to lean down to the height of your fiat 500 "we've got a budget of £19 so we couldn't get a train ticket, so these barbers gave us a lift, we have about 40 minutes of travel time and one mode of transport left"
"right okay" you sipped on your diet coke from the drivers seat watching chazza eat his strawberry laces
"can you google how far the bov house is, or a train station and we can get a train somewhere" morgan asked and you moved to grab your phone
"and we have to go to KFC" chazza added making you laugh
"is that a challenge?" you asked looking at the camera as ginge shook his head
"you haven't got any spare cash on you?" he asked knowing you keep some in your car for emergencies
"I've got a tenner" you grabbed it from your glove box handing it to your boyfriend
"We take donations" they looked to the camera man for approval
"its gone up to an hour foot rub" you demanded from morgan making him pull a conflicted face before taking it from you in agreement
"we have to do another challenge, can you wait here for a bit?" you nodded
"ill find a parking space, the bov house is an hour away"
~
10:43
the clip resumed from when the two entered your car
"cant believe the millionaire has his girlfriend driving in this" chazza complained as morgan sat in the front and he and the camera man were squashed in the back
"do you want me to leave you here" you asked seriously turning around to face him
"would save you from her horrid driving to be fair" morgan told him receiving a dirt look from you
"excuse me you asked me for a lift" you reminded "and i went and bought your shit for you" you looked at the redbull in his hand "where am i going now?" you asked leaving the parking garage
"kfc please" chazza told you and ginge moved to type it into your car screen
~
11:07
"what do you recon jakeys doing right now?" chazza asked as he you and morgan sat in kfc, morgan's arm around the back of your chair as you waited for your order
"wanna know something weird about jakey" morgan started making you laugh as you remembered the days earlier events "he walked into the living room, no pants on first of all just boxers and a shirt, scarred reader for life"
"feel sorry for ellie" you leaned into morgan
"he goes outside 'what have you been doing' 'cutting my toenails'" you pulled a disgusted face
"what" chazza exclaimed with a laugh as you moved to the counter to receive your order
"you're not eating this in my car" you told them placing it down on the table "just cleaned it"
"couldn't tell" morgan seriously spoke "all your bloody hair clips everywhere" you just playfully hit his shoulder
~
12:01
the penultimate clip of the video was from the AB vlog where he came to the bov house
"rocket detected" AB said as you entered the frame of his camera "joking im not trying to be disrespectful" he held his hands up in jest as he caught a look from ginge and a laugh from you
"this is on" morgan said as you two sat in the sauna
"last one to pass out" AB spoke into the camera "love shit like this, do any of you use this"
"no" chazza and jakey responded
"we do" you answered sitting next to chazza at the back, resulting in a laugh from morgan and a blush to appear on his face making the rest of the boys groan
"erh, don't even want to know what goes on in there" Alfie was quick to move out of the sauna, chazza and jakey following quickly behind whilst you just giggled
~
13:11
the final clip was a long one, it was just you and morgan on his stream you were duetting one of his new favourite songs, 'iloveitiloveitiloveit' by bella kay
all lights in the room were off due to the late time of 2AM, the two of you were illuminated by the lights from his pc
you were both screaming the lyrics whilst dancing around his room, you had seen this club numerous times in edits, despite it only being filmed very recently
unfortunately your fun was cut short as tays entered the room
"can you two shut the fuck up" he slammed the door shut as he left only making you two giggle as the song continued playing in the background
~
after the video ended you reposted it and looked at the comments
user1: genuinely love their relationship
user2: how's he done that then
user3: am i the only one who finds them cringe
-> user4: yes
you smile reached ear to ear when Morgan entered the room
"what you smiling at" he asked moving to his draws to pull out some pajamas for the both of you
"i just love you" you stood up and went to kiss him
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Alfie Buttle x fem!reader
Summary: reader faces deep insecurity from a past relationship and sees the effects of it in her new relationship with alfie
Notes: really really really love this song
Masterlist
You and Alfie met during probably one of the most depressing times of your life, your boyfriend of a year had just cheated on you, the whole situation was full of gaslighting, lies and betrayal so you were pretty stung still, months later
"I don't think I can" your voice was small and saddening contrasting to the loud upbeat noise from everywhere else inside of the pub
Alfie had asked you to be his girlfriend but you couldn't find it within yourself to say yes "its unfair to you" you looked at him sincerly "i've got all these insecurities and bad thoughts now when it comes to dating"
"Maybe i'll be the antidote to that" Alfie moved to grab your hand across the pub table, it did make you smile but you still had the thought about all the other pretty girls he could be with, ones who didn't come with this much baggage
~~
Eventually you agreed to Alfie, and you were officially dating, it was good for awhile, whilst you were in the honeymoon phase
It was like no one else mattered to the two of you
"You look beautiful" he said coming up behind you in the mirror, his large hand moving to you waist to hold you as you looked at yourself, fixing your hair which didn't want to work with you "relax" he took the hand out of your hair and moved it closer to him making you turn "you look stunning"
"Thank you" you smiled feeling all the negative thoughts be sucked away "I suppose you look nice too" you laughed watching his face scrunch up
"you suppose" he laughed and moved to pick you up whilst you were full of giggles and yells and he threw you on the bed
"you look better from this angle" you told him looking up from under him as he trapped you on the bed, he grinned before leaning down to kiss you
As Alfie's career grew he was needed in London more, whether it was to film a fellas pod or a shoot for another creator, he was up there a lot
More of your nights were now spent alone, either at your own flat or in Alfie's grotto when you particularly missed him, he gave you a key early on into your relationship and it was one of the things that grounded your thoughts when it came to Alfie
He wasn't like your ex, he didn't look at other girls when he was with you, he wasn't following them secretly on Instagram but he did have his online persona AB, where Alfie presents himself to be single and have hundreds of girls at his feet
It did honestly hurt and did bring back some insecurities you thought were cured, you couldn't count the amount of nights you laid in one of your beds alone thinking he was with someone else
But he would always squash the evil infiltrating your brain when he'd facetime you, he was always alone in his hotel room complaining about the water pressure or the room décor being too depressing
He truly felt like your antidote you needed
~~
"Come to London with me?" he asked one night late in bed the two of you cuddled up under the covers trying to combat the cold English temperatures
"Right now? im a bit busy" you gestured down to your current position with a laugh
"I'm being serious, been looking at a gaff" his eyes were hopeful and determined which eased your mind a bit
It again took you a few weeks to agree, which did worry Alfie he was worried that you weren't as committed as him and if you were trying to protect yourself from the same hurt and betrayal you faced last time
The move to London was quick, you found another job straight away and the lease on your flat was up anyway, the first few weeks in London were great
You and Alfie would have weekly dates exploring the city late at night after your shift finished and his shoots were done, he also had finally revealed he had a girlfriend to his fans which was received well so far
It was perfect for a time, then your workload increased at work and you had to stay later, leaving Alfie at your new flat alone
Alfie
Gonna go pub with the lads
Message me when your on your way home x
You weren't bothered and answered quickly about how you'd join him when your shift was over, no worries had crossed your mind till Alfie's snap notification came up on your phone
He was obsessed with that app and posted multiple times a day, the most consistent thing about Alfie were his morning photos of him half awake in bed, sometimes featuring your hand on his chest on your hair on his shoulder
The photo wasn't anything incriminating but to you it felt like it was, it was him Sabina and this other girl, one you hadn't met before, you knew Sabina and were good friends, but this other girl was new and her hand was placed conveniently on Alfie's large bicep
It didn't matter to you how much Alfie loved you or how amazing your love felt, in that moment you were full of doubt and worry
You left work moments later, but just went straight home you couldn't sit in a pub and talk to Alfie's friends like your thoughts weren't moving at a million miles an hour
You felt unravelled, you spent all this time trying to bandage yourself back up but one little photo could undo it all
You knew you were overreacting and Alfie would be upset you didn't join him
But you couldn't help it, Alfie couldn't stitch up all your problems and wouldn't ever be the cure to your thoughts
summary: every time AB mentioned his girl during his penthouse tour
alfie buttle x fem reader
Masterlist
"So the gaffs bare messy. Just gotta ignore it" alfie said staring into the camera before panning it around the lower level of his flat "this is the living area of sorts" he points towards the sofa "this, I still cant believe I got this sofa into the gaff, had to do it all by myself"
"That's a lie" your muffled voice could be heard from upstairs as you tried to expose the truth
"Someone tell this girl that standing there isn't helping" he complained deadpanning to the camera before walking towards the sofa and laying down for a moment
"You said I just had to look pretty" he laughed at your response remembering his distain to you helping, only allowing you to make sure he had it in the best place in the flat
~~~~~~
"On the mantlepiece, gold supreme dumbbell from that sidemen vid, cute pic of me and reader" he zoomed into the picture of the two from many years ago when you had just left school "chat tell me I've glowed up, readers still a rocket obviously" he turned the camera back round to him before quickly moving on "fake Bonzi tree reader made me get for decoration, most of the stuff here is reader trying to decorate"
His camera moved to a few more objects dotted around proving his point, he specifically zoomed in to the little cushions placed on the sofa "the most uncomfortable lump of fluff I've ever encountered, but reader says its brings the room together" your laughter could be heard in the background
~~~~~~
"Prize possession" he pointed at the photo of the grotto "photo of the other gaff, very important when living in London to have a photo of the superior gaff" the camera moved down "more fake plants reader bought, little lego set" his hand entered frame to grab something from the lower level of the shelf "receipt from me and readers first date at the cinema, cringe" he spoke the last word loudly so it would reach higher in the flat
"You love it" you responded from the bedroom knowing he was teasing and trying to rage bait "you kept the receipt not me"
"Can't lie don't even remember what we saw, was hella time ago" the camera flipped back to him smirking trying to bait a reaction out of you but only receiving a loud sigh
He quickly moved on continuing to show random things "Japanese one dot, which is actually a two dot I believe, which did throw me off at the time, I've been hiding this from a certain someone" in contrast to earlier his voice was lowered trying to keep a secret especially since he bought more earlier in the vlog, knowing you weren't the biggest fan
~~~~~~
"I've wasted a lot of money on this" alfie confessed showing his football card collection "considering I've got zero interest in it now, reader actually bought me a shit ton as well, gotta love her" he moves over to his staircase "these are real plants actually, I have to water them, you don't have to water them that regularly though"
"You do" you cut him off laughing "I just do it when you forget"
"Stop making me look bad for the vlog" he pulled an offended face "she's a liar chat, start a reader hate train down below" he laughed before deadpanning the camera once again "need some engagement"
~~~~~~
"Got this for Christmas" the camera showed a sun lounger on his balcony "does look shit, but is bare comfortable" the camera cut to show him laying on it "imagine for the two days before that shit" he pointed up at the construction "the sun, my girl, me it was a bit of a movie"
He smiled at the memory, you and him battered by the heat, the English sun was strong when it wanted to be
~~~~~~
"Beds mad comfortable now" he panned the camera onto you laid in bed "leng ting didn't come with the gaff" you visibly cringed at his words as he put on a deeper roadman accent before he moved on panning the camera quickly between you and the red lights in the ceiling, giggling at his inference before you threw a pillow at him making him retreat to the bathroom
"There's no hot water and I don't know how to change it" alfie told the vlog whilst stood a few feet away from you
"My dad said he'll fix it" you looked towards him whilst scrolling on your phone
"No" he denied too quickly "I shall sort it" he shook his head at the camera secretly "I kind of rate that it forces me to have cold showers" the camera catches your head slowly turn and give him the biggest funny look you could muster
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