~Caroline stone~

And other times I feel their pity, patting on my back and giving me some peace.

I wonder when their pity will arrive.

I'm the therapist of the family, I listen, and listen, and listen, I solve problems, I comfort, I lend them a hand, a shoulder even, I embrace them.

I'm the peacemaker of the family, I dissolve conflict, I play nice, I'm the glue that sticks them together.

I'm the priest of the family, I conceal their deepest darkest secrets, I carry them in my heart, I'll carry them to my grave.

I'm everything and anything that they could ask for me to be, I could mold myself into anything they'd like if that puts a smile on their face. But in the privacy of my own room, I carry my own, I love in silence, I cry in silence, I breath in silence, I breakdown, I tremble and shiver and crumble, I fall into the black hole I call my mind. And I disappear without making a sound.

And ever since then i've been frozen

Not knowing where to go

North is where my faith is

South is where my past lives

East is where my heart rests

And west is where the devil lies

And here I am waiting for a sign

Whether it's from the sun, the stars or the god in the sky

To get me home, to let me die

In the arms of my lover

Where i'll finally close my eyes.

I hate it when I feel ugly because then I'm not seen

I want to capture the gaze of anyone passing by

I want to be chosen first

I want to be liked, i want to be liked so bad.

I want someone to be curious about every little thing in my life.

I want to be a daily passing thought

I want to be a character in someone's book

I want to be cherished and cared for

I want to be the poet's inspiration

I want to be selfish enough to ask for these things

I want to be known.