Believe me, I am trying. So hard. I do love myself. I love my body, my character, my inner voice, I love spending time with myself. But everytime I try concentrating just on me, my brain shows me how desperate I am for human connection.

Maybe it is because I am 21 and I have not been in a relationship once - maybe it is because my first kiss was this january in a three people constellation, with a couple that has been together for quite a while, and who in the end did not want me.

I want someone who looks at me. Who wants me. Who I can love and devour with my whole heart and they love all of me.