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In the meantime, I’ve been re-reading old posts. 

The universe loves to foreshadow apparently.... Back in spring of 2016, I’d finally cut Josh off for good, and I was reblogging Moomin things saying I wanted them. 

In October of 2016, I met Finn, and he started bringing me so much Moomin stuff all the time, but he didn’t know I wanted it. 

I would love to be the weight I used to be when I was obsessing over it. Didn’t know how good I had it. 

But something else I realized -- I started this blog after cutting Josh off for the final time but it also coincided with when I first got sick and was looking for answers. 

So it feels like the end of an era. I symbolically choose to close the chapters of loss and sickness.

I am choosing instead to walk forward in wellness and in love. I think Finn is sticking around.  

I may not get to delete the tumblr before midnight since the export is still processing, but once it’s complete, this blog will be gone to the world. 

I hope to put out better things into the world going forward.

I’ll be gone by midnight central time.

Thank you for so many years of listening to everything.

Feeling a little better now but what the heck was that?

These stats are different than the home sleep study stats. But even the app says to only seek help if it is “severe” …. For under severe, it just says to make modifications to your sleep environment.

I don’t know why my snore frequency offends me lol

It also recorded my cat’s meows (which it correctly identified) and that was really cute.

The snores it recorded are sooo not attractive. Finn still claims he doesn’t usually hear me snore.

When my hair gets to be shoulder length again, I’m going to need to figure out some way to make it look fuller. I’m honestly horrified by how thin it is. It is so, so bad.

How did I know that was coming 😵‍💫

Someone suggested making a salad kit and throwing it into a tortilla to make a wrap and it is honestly my favorite new thing. I made it last night. I had a wrap and some extra extra salad on the side, and then I used the rest of the salad to make this wrap for today, so I guess one salad kit would make 3 wraps. I did put some sweet earth chicken in it for protein.

A guy from the iron group had messaged me a while ago and we’ve just been talking ever since. Today he asked why I don’t come back to Germany for insurance (bro, I wish!!!) and I explained I couldn’t figure out a way to stay.

Now it’s more than that — I no longer have family there to stay with if things go poorly or end up in the hospital, I’d be alone. I didn’t tell him that.