‘Cause at least Mondays are not pretending !

if we just breed one really huge cow we could just shave steaks off of it for probably 100 years before it got hurt or died

we should breed trillions of micro cows and eat them like sunflower seeds and they all feel pain and die

pirates of the caribbean really introduced an eldritch octopus man who kills indiscriminately and torments the dead as their poster villain and then you watch the movies and it's like, "oh no, actually the worst villain in this series is a small white british man who functions as the herald of capitalism" and that was very very brave of them

It's ok to lead an utterly meaningless life and achieve nothing of value and leave no mark on the world.. it's literally fine

Listening and learning 🗒️✍️

You can listen but remember it's ok not to learn. It's literally fine to not retain anything or derive insight from the swirling morass of sensation in which you exist

Oh thank god 😮‍💨

“hey this dog looks to be struggling to perform very basic functions and that is very worrying” “well ACTUALLY if you STUDIED THE BREED STANDARD you’d see that this dog is actually the IDEAL ______” YEAH. THIS TOO IS THE PROBLEM. WHAT ARE YOU NOT GETTING.

“you can’t blame breeders for breeding to standard :/“ i actually find it very easy to blame them. they are the ones creating the dogs on purpose, you see

Imagine a fluffy unicorn that’s bred for its wool like a sheep- once or twice a year it has to get shorn and the shearer just has to awkwardly flop and position the unicorn around without getting stabbed. Perhaps they cover the horn with a protective pool noodle

@wizardpotions

I see the vision

sometimes you have to be a bit mentally ill to get mentally well so if thinking naruto would be proud of you for brushing your teeth is what gets you to brush your teeth well grab that toothbrush dattebayo