aira

I love you. (I acted like I hated you during our entire relationship to which I’m unsure how you’re going to feel better about it, every time I see you even for a second I’m filled with visceral rage and sickness but I hate to be away from you, I think about your dead body in my bed, your friends disgust me, I don’t know if I’m capable of love, I may be hallucinating your figure, I’m jealous when you aren’t alone, I think of leaving things in your house when you’re away.)

“Don’t let my silence wound you. I’m just tired of words.”

“I believe that each of us internalizes a landscape composite of myths and stories, and we carry that psychological terrain within us as we make our way through the world, whether we are facing that green divan that Anna Akhmatova slept on in Saint Petersburg or gazing out at Stone Mountain in Georgia, an overlay by which the future is often colored and through which it is often perceived. However, like Lillian Smith—“Miss Lil”—some of us attempt to refashion that inherited landscape through consciousness. That is, we attempt to bring ourselves to an awareness of what has shaped us. Since landscape is both regional and emotional, I learned to meditate on everything around me, people and nature.”

“His tears are small drops of jade. Red & white jade. His tears have turned to jade.”