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@bl0rbohandbag
tumblr i have not been here since the bygone era of the rise of brave tangled dragons for you to ask for my fucking age

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Royal Sword Academy —> Academia Real de Espadas
Night Raven College —> Universidade do Corvo da Noite
Os nomes claramente sendo mais legais em português 🇧🇷
what kind of fuckass dorm names are these
I don't know who needs to hear this but Mina Harker would fire a pointblank shotgun blast up Dracula's dusty puckered asshole before she would EVER have eyes for anyone but her adoring, devoted husband, and that is a FACT. If you think that brilliant, capable woman would so much as spare a passing glance at that pasty, shriveled, undead son of a bitch then you either hate Mina & all that she stands for or you have the literacy of a toenail clipping.
every time they make a new dracula movie with mina as the reincarnated lover and dracula as the tragic antihero a fairy dies

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collecting these
HOW could i forget this classic
pretending everything is okay and that no one
is wearing their dead loved one’s skin
definitely wearing their dead loved one’s skin
and he did
"brighter" is a very motivational song, if you really think about it
saying you're mourning the loss of one of your own while the guy is literally still considered missing is one hell of a freudian slip.

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vox thinking alastor is pissed off about him driving a smear campaign against the hotel when alastor has been fucking off from work since the beginning of the season is the funniest thing actually.
did anybody notice vox's stupid fucking pout while the vees were running away btw. he's sad because they didn't let him detonate a whole nuclear bomb and kill everyone
the idea of vox and alastor meeting in life (timeline and geographical incompatibilities aside) is so funny to me because vox was like. just killing people.
alastor was killing, potentially cannibalizing his victims and using them as sacrifices for demon summonings. that's like a different level of freak local weather boy vincent whittman would be used to.
alastor’s… scars?
really curious about the stitchings on alastor this season. maybe someone has already talked about this and i'm being repetitive and obvious, but hear me out.
i know we have seen the stiches on his face, i'm not really going to touch on those, but the ones on his body look interesting.
[HAZBIN HOTEL SEASON 2 SPOILERS]
After the latest episodes, I'm starting to believe that Vox tried to hypnotise Alastor after the flashback we saw. And he may have succeeded, for a while.
Alastor said that he respected Vox until he ruined everything. And yes, the scene we saw could be that. Clearly, Alastor didn't take the proposal well. But now we've seen Vox trying to hypnotise Valentino, a partner he's been with for years and has already agreed to do so many things for him. Even if it's a reaction to Alastor's words, he doesn't hesitate to break the trust they have.
The flashback cuts off before Vox reacts, but how can you say no to someone like him? I can perfectly imagine him automatically switching to using his power and telling Alastor that he said yes, and Alastor… believing him for a moment.
And why would it work on him? Because Alastor didn't expect Vox to do that, and I suspect he was drunk or at least in that happy state.
Do you remember what Mimzy said in season one about Alastor? He is a total sweetie!
He was drinking when we saw them. He orders another whisky right there on the scene. What if him being so friendly and trusting with Vox, apart from having some fondness for him, is because he was already in "kitten" mode.
(What if Vox misinterprets how he acts and thinks they're closer than they really are)
And why do I think it worked? The photo. Vox clearly has a more modern head. What if he managed to get Alastor to work with him for a while and the motive he copied so many things (the suit, for example), it's because he was creating a brand for both of them.
Alastor accuses Vox of using excuses and lies to get what he wants, what if he was wondering why he was teaming up with Vox but he kept messing with him until he managed to free himself completely?
We still haven't seen a single scene from Alastor's past told from his perspective. Mimzy tells us about his early days in hell, Rosie about his past on earth, we see Vox's version of what happened between them… and we still haven't had access to what was going through his mind at the time.
Patiently waiting for him to decide to speak and spill the tea for real this time!
ADDING ANOTHER THOUGHT: If you make him believe that he said yes and that he thinks it's a good idea, Alastor would be okay with being a partner even if he doesn't understand why. So if other people mentioned it to him, he would be confused about why he is doing it, but… that's what Alastor decided, right? At least until he realised that something was very wrong and saw the lie.
Alastor complains that his name no longer inspires as much terror as it used to, the hotel cast had to ask Mimzy for details… It is possible that Hell has forgotten that, for a brief period, Alastor and Vox were working together.
The "He asked me to join his team, I said no, and now he's pissy" could be speaking lightly about all this (Vox's breakdown being this attempt to force him to be a team until Alastor defends himself and that's the big fight where he almost beat him) or maybe can come later, when Vox teams up with Valentino but Alastor doesn't want to be part of that specific team and fight them.
Vox is the one who elicits the strongest reaction from Alastor when he is in his tower without people watching. If I were him, I would still be very angry about the topic, no matter how many masks and smiles he normally wears.

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i'm personally a big fan of alastor, who frequently puts his hands all over people whenever he feels like it regardless of their opinion, loudly professing that he hates it when vox does the same. they are so hypocrite4hypocrite
WAIT WAIT WAIT
so i went back to episode 4 and noticed that in the flashback, you CAN see that alastor is uncomfortable with the touching!
pay close attention to how alastor is initially looking at vox as he's talking, but the second vox's hand touches his shoulder, his eyes drift to where vox is touching, and narrow a bit until vox removes his hand. it's so subtle!!
and ofc, here he does the same thing, and alastor just looks at vox's hands touching his shoulder again:
here, in the flashback, he tolerates it. there's subtle annoyance, but he makes no attempt to pull away.
there's other instances like this one where he does pull away, but vox touched him like this SO MANY times during the past episodes, and now we know alastor's been pissed about it the whole time