sometimes the shit breaks you

Marylanders don’t say hi hello how are you my name is they just try to kill you with their car. which is of course a great honor in their culture

while you were busy jacking off & cumming hard. it rained outside beautifully

what do you think i was jacking off to...?

lowkey i just killed all innocents

notice how no one died

being a team sports fan really is like oh what if you stanned the ship of theseus

Always reblog Pangzai, legend.

our expedition of franklin is collapsing

i met agent 47 in an elevator today and i asked him what mission he was on and he said he couldnt say its top secret and then winked at me covertly and said he will try to get a good ranking. and i think he will.

dilute black (blue) ticked tabby abyssinian

with low sour cream spotting

Someone should make a Disco Elysium successor where you play as a futuristic supersoldier who comes across an ancient ringworld and has to stop the Covenant from using it to destroy all life in the galaxy

something has to be done about mormons this cannot continue