sometimes the shit breaks you

god grant me the wisdom of the serpent, and the chimps willingness to strike

Being even mildly politically aware is hell. "Why is gas so high???" Bitch i outta smack you

Idk I have so little patience for willfully ignorant people. You know the entire plot of Fruit Love Island or whatever the fuck but can't take an hour outta your day to look up why everything is falling apart around you? Embarrassing

she GOFAST on my GIMBAL til i disclose

dude have you watched arcade. it's based on a game called leading legends but it's actually good as fuck. even parents watch it.

What does hate fuck mean ?

when hate someone so much you fuck them

they send me to space war even though i’m so freaking small i’m literally just a grunt. they only gave me a pasma pistol. i’m gonna fucking die

got a good thing going where these bandits give me a half share of whatever loot they pull from adventurers i send their way & the best part is i don't even need to lie or anything since every hero is born with the unshakeable belief in their ability to win a fight against ten guys at once. just gotta say "we've got bandit trouble in the west, let me mark it on your map" and a week later i get $15 from Wulfric the Hound on cashapp