BingoBats

you aren't a bad person if your source is an abuser.

you aren't a bad person if your source is a rapist.

you aren't a bad person if your source has a problematic creator.

you aren't a bad person if your source is anything, anything.

when i get obsessed with a show, like really obsessed the lines between what's fiction and what's real start to blur. i start to feel connected to these characters, like they aren't people I am watching on the screen in front of me but ones that i know. i feel empathy for them, and i feel scared and anxious too when they're in danger.

when i get really obsessed with a show it completely takes a hold of me, i have an animalistic urge to keep engaging because it's not just their world anymore - it's my world too now. i cannot even escape from it in my dreams, as it infects that too.

and then when you add in the DID when i have an introject from the media it makes the obsessive spiral even more immersive. i am connected to the show in an even deeper way, though i know i am not really a character in the show i can't help but view my source as myself. that is me and this is my show!

Context: I’m a DID system who’s been looking into endogenic systemhood for years now out of curiosity.

Trauma is not in the criteria for CDDs, which is actually essential for systems like mine to get our diagnosis. I didn’t recall any childhood trauma at the time of my diagnosis, and while I definitely do now, trauma being part of the criteria for CDDs would’ve barred me from that diagnosis. I’m completely with you that these disorders require repeated childhood trauma to form — but that’s not from the criteria! That information comes from years and years of studies into the origins of these CDDs.

The vast majority of endogenic systems do not claim to have any form of CDD. There are certain similarities between endogenic systemhood and CDD systemhood — namely, having multiple autonomous agents in one brain, and potentially dissociative moments brought on for various reasons — but by and large, they’re not experiencing the same type of systemhood as us. To utilize your analogy, this is saying you wear reading glasses, but don’t need them all the time — or even, people who wear glasses with no prescription, as that fits and frames their face in a pleasing way. And, just like there’s thousands of types of frames and lenses, there’s thousands of types of ways a system might present itself (both in endogenic systemhood and in CDD systemhood).

I have seen endogenic systems who also experience kins! This doesn’t negate their systemhood, however; the experience of the two feelings are entirely different from what I’ve heard. I don’t personally understand that one (I don’t really understand kins much) but just like how CDD alters aren’t kins, it seems endogenic headmates also aren’t.

Lastly, I want to highlight that a lot of terminology is shared between the CDD and endogenic communities, but this isn’t due to endogenic systems “stealing” from disordered communities or “claiming to have a CDD.” Not saying you said this, but it’s a common argument I see. In truth, the endogenic community stemmed off of a subset of the DID/MPD community years ago (even back when it was still MPD). These individuals sometimes were diagnosed with DID, or experienced plurality, but didn’t feel the diagnosis label fit them. Regardless of the actual truth surrounding their CDD status (if they had it or not, if they were diagnosed or not, etc etc), they were part of that community. Hence, the language after the big split in the community remains the same across both “sides” rather firmly.

This link is to a collection of resources pulled together by the guardian system. I CANNOT attest to the quality of all of these resources, and I do actually actively despise some of the resources. For instance, the “normal dimensions of multiple personality” one actively fakeclaims DID, but is worded in such a way that it sounds like it’s supporting endogenic plurality. I would read carefully, as some of these articles aren’t the best, but others hold a lot of value. I would be on the lookout for the last name Eve — I’ve liked some of what I read from that person!

I would avoid Power to the Plural links, as those frequently spread misinformation about DID. I would glance at pluraldeepdive, both the tumblr page and the website, if you’re interested in the history of plural spaces — the good and the bad.

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

show us a picture of your handwriting?

3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

what’s an inside joke you have with your family or friends?

what made you start your blog?

what’s the best and worst part of being online/a creator?

what scares you the most and why?

any reacquiring dreams?

tell a story about your childhood

would you say you’re an emotional person?

what do you consider to be romance?

what’s some good advice you want to share?

what are you doing right now?

what’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do?

what do you think of when you hear the word “home”?

if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

name 3 things that make you happy

do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens?

favourite thing about the day?

favourite things about the night?

are you a spiritual person?

say 3 things about someone you love

say 3 things about someone you hate

what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?

fave season and why?

fave colour and why?

any nicknames?

do you collect anything?

what do you do when you’re sad?

what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy/happier?

are you messy or organised?

how many tabs do you have open right now?

any hobbies?

any pet peeves?

do you trust easily?

are you an open book or do you have walls up?

share a secret

fave song at the moment?

youtuber you’ve been obsessed with and why?

any bad habits?

Context: I’m a DID system who’s been looking into endogenic systemhood for years now out of curiosity.

Trauma is not in the criteria for CDDs, which is actually essential for systems like mine to get our diagnosis. I didn’t recall any childhood trauma at the time of my diagnosis, and while I definitely do now, trauma being part of the criteria for CDDs would’ve barred me from that diagnosis. I’m completely with you that these disorders require repeated childhood trauma to form — but that’s not from the criteria! That information comes from years and years of studies into the origins of these CDDs.

The vast majority of endogenic systems do not claim to have any form of CDD. There are certain similarities between endogenic systemhood and CDD systemhood — namely, having multiple autonomous agents in one brain, and potentially dissociative moments brought on for various reasons — but by and large, they’re not experiencing the same type of systemhood as us. To utilize your analogy, this is saying you wear reading glasses, but don’t need them all the time — or even, people who wear glasses with no prescription, as that fits and frames their face in a pleasing way. And, just like there’s thousands of types of frames and lenses, there’s thousands of types of ways a system might present itself (both in endogenic systemhood and in CDD systemhood).

I have seen endogenic systems who also experience kins! This doesn’t negate their systemhood, however; the experience of the two feelings are entirely different from what I’ve heard. I don’t personally understand that one (I don’t really understand kins much) but just like how CDD alters aren’t kins, it seems endogenic headmates also aren’t.

Lastly, I want to highlight that a lot of terminology is shared between the CDD and endogenic communities, but this isn’t due to endogenic systems “stealing” from disordered communities or “claiming to have a CDD.” Not saying you said this, but it’s a common argument I see. In truth, the endogenic community stemmed off of a subset of the DID/MPD community years ago (even back when it was still MPD). These individuals sometimes were diagnosed with DID, or experienced plurality, but didn’t feel the diagnosis label fit them. Regardless of the actual truth surrounding their CDD status (if they had it or not, if they were diagnosed or not, etc etc), they were part of that community. Hence, the language after the big split in the community remains the same across both “sides” rather firmly.