Some Cereal

Prep Time: 20 seconds Cook Time: None Servings: 2

Sometimes we think we’ve got this whole cooking thing down and then sometimes we’re like, why do we even bother we’re the worst at this and everything is just a total mess. We’re all going to our parents’ house for the weekend to just catch up on some sleep. We were going to think of something better than cereal but then Sarah from finance mentioned that she read somewhere there are roughly 32,000 gun deaths per year in the United States and yet the government isn’t doing anything to make it harder to obtain firearms, and we just didn’t feel up to it.

Ingredients: Cheerios. Maybe. You might also have gotten Honey Bunches of Oats. We ran out of Cheerios.

Knick Knacks: Just eat it dry, OK?

Prepare the ingredients: Open cereal bag.

Plate the Dish: Pour the cereal into a bowl or mug or reach in there and pick out pieces of it while you scan through Twitter, compose a tweet with a joke about Paul Ryan’s vacant, emotionless expression and then delete it because honestly, what’s the point? Go to bed at 9 pm. Wake up at 12 am in a cold sweat, remember Trump pulled out of the Paris Climate Agreement and the polar ice caps may melt, leaving much of the US underwater. Eat a few more handfuls. Just shove the shit directly into your mouth.

Wine Pairing: A shot, oh fuck it, two shots, it’s Thursday. Chase it with half a capful of NyQuil. Go crazy while you still can.