aspiring hagraven

products are so bad now that i have to do approximately 8 hours of research before i buy anything

ikea is honestly so sick and twisted for making those tiny fake apartments. like. ok. maybe I will walk around and daydream. fuck u.

some salads are amazing and then other salads feel like you're stuck in purgatory just eating leaves forever

enough, kitten. tell daddy where the amulet is or you will never leave this place alive

I briefly forgot about the underwater tin can and was really confused for a bit

“she should be at the club” “but not everybody can handle loud music / likes going out / enjoys drinking / wants to—“ YOURE MISSING THE POINT. “she should be at the club” is not about the literal club!! it’s about the whimsy of youth!! it’s about the things you can get away with, body and mind!! it’s about having fun and ignoring the horrors for as long as you can!! it’s about the fact that you do not deserve to feel this pain and have these responsibilities, you do not deserve to be locked in your room with your sadness, you deserve to enjoy the music and the pretty lights and the ass shaking of life!!! it’s about how i wish joy for you, even if you do not wish it for yourself!!! you should be at the club!!!!

if you think about it, in their effort to be the least sexual cereal, cornflakes are actually the most sexual cereal, on account of the fact that most cereals are 0% concerned with sex in any way

Official ominous sign

everyone talks about one-hit wonders, but no one seems to think about two-hit wonders. neon trees released “everybody talks” and “animals” and then fucked off forever. LMFAO released “party rock” and “sexy and i know it” and then apologized and left the radio. many such cases, all of which are deeply fascinating to me

W- where?

Utopian techno-futurist concept: a tofu container which has a peel-away lid which is not bonded more strongly to the container than to itself, and as such can simply be peeled away rather than being iteratively torn into shreds or cut with a knife.