BEHOLD MY SQUEES

I'm breaking character here, so don't tell anyone, but it was never actually in the book. the real sentence was "Claws the size of bananas shot toward me."

and then this was the edit note:

it's just that when I saw the edit note, my first impulse was to come up with an even worse banana sentence, and........ you all saw the bloodbath that followed.

here's the final line that made it into the book:

…Palpatine’s office is a womb right? Its where Sidious’ perfect apprentice is developed. He’s nurtured in this space by Palpatine until he Anakin leaves it reborn Vader.

Like there’s really so much to say about Palpatine and yonic symbolism.

He’s also almost an anti-mother. With Anakin only knowing a mother’s love, and both of his major conflicts being about saving his mother and the mother of his children, Palpatine is a perversion of both. With Palpatine eventually replacing both Shmi and Padmé. Initially taking a nurturing role throughout his conflict over his mother, and eventually becoming the person Vader is most dedicated to through his conflict over Padmé.

Shmi’s child (Anakin) dies and is reborn Darth Vader. Idk it’s just paired with the raw bloody entrance like outfit we wears. They’re in this red organ like office and Vader is being born through Sidious. Its almost a gory birth scene.

Then there’s like the inverse of Anakin with his mother happening in this scene. With Palpatine arriving on time.

On top of this they don't have sexual organs. This is the one that really fucked everyone up. The ancient Greeks said mad shit, one old timey English(?) guy spent years dissecting thousands and thousands of eels and never found their sexual organs.

Anyway, what happens is, when they're done fucking around in europe they say "right. Time for fuck!" and then fuck off out into the ocean and spend months swimming across the god damn Atlantic to over near the Americas. Then their digestive systems fully dissolve and THEN they develop sexual organs.

Why? You ask? Why do these sentient noodles swim half way accross the god damn world to fuck? Well the answer is easy really.

Pangaea.

Yea. Turns out when they first started off, all the contenants were right beside each other so it wasn't that far a trip. Over millions of years as the contenants spread out they just kinda went 'wow, it feels like this trip gets a little bit longer every time'. They weren't wrong and they sure as shit didn't stop.

So, yea, turns out that not only are the slippy guys in the Themes the same as the slippy guys the Mediterranean, but they're also statistically older than you and at the end of their life they fuck off over the ocean for about 5000 miles so they can loose their guts to grow dicks and pussys.

@trickstertime ??? the way this is actually all fucking ture???

And it’s even better that the power of love doesn’t completely defang him! I was cheering the whole time for this nasty old man and his loyal beefcake.

Needless to say, I’m extremely thrilled to find out you’ve got another book coming and I will be preordering

this was so nice to read!

here's the sexual content guidelines saying nudity is ok

here's the bit from the termination email telling you you can make a new account as long as it doesn't break the same rule

here's the guidelines for what counts as explicit (not mature, aka grounds for content deletion)

here's the section telling us that you will always be able to respond to content getting flagged as explicit (lie)

here's the section where it says you will be notified when your accunt gets terminated, and that the appeals are reviewed by humans (both lies)

and by the way, posting a single thing against ToS isn't supposed to be grounds for deletion, (this is what the termination email is warning you about)

sharing content without content labels isn't either

And Sokka just gets distracted by what good quality rope he was tied up with and decides to keep it.

First, Sokka, your origins growing up in a poor isolated fishing village are showing. Good practicality there.