goonies never say die

I hate that when you’re stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize you’re already stressed and don’t need that and start functioning better actually

official library post

saying "question mark?" and "however comma," out loud are game changers. punctuation on the go. and it's always the funniest thing that anyone around you has ever heard

I really love when cats use their front legs to hold something in place while they use their back legs to kick the absolute shit out of it

knuckle tats say FOUC AULT

knuck tats saying POST, and on the other hand, having transcended the limitations of the form, STRUCTURALIST

i wish you could laugh react eBay listings. that's not worth $250. you fucking asshole. lmao

you should also be able to do this to job listings

rice is like a best friend and a lover to me

getting into something that none of your mutuals care about is one of the bravest things you can do

Artfully layering an axe bodyspray deodorant and two different perfume oils to create a tasteful mixture of amber, oud, mint, lavender, moss and petrichor, producing a scent that smells exactly like damp, stale, rotting laundry.

Reminds me of that tumblr user that made powdered milk with sparkling water and created instant spoiled milk

That was also me.

Do you know any other ways to speed ruin things?

I wish I knew any other way to do anything.