Life's a Banquet

The bubble is nigh.

I am 45 fucking years old….etc.,

The one notable difference is that the two times I had to fire felons, they were actually like "Yeah, you gotta fire me for that. I get it. Thank you for the opportunity."

"Our other kid is very bright and is neurotypical as far as we know, but is very stubborn and argumentative and insists on wearing one ratty old jacket every day and eating the same breakfast and lunch every day and has a sleep disorder and is messy and forgetful and always loses homework and has gotten in a few fights "defending" other kids, oh and is also dyslexic but we worked through that so they read about twenty novels a week so at least they're not getting into trouble at parties or anything, even if we are a bit frustrated that they keep failing math and science classes while getting high grades in everything else. They'd be such a good student if only they put in a little effort or paid attention."

and then i remembered the story of the tenured civil engineering professor who, with a running start, would leap and throw himself full-force at skyscraper windows in order to demonstrate their structural properties, until one day the window popped out of the frame, unbroken of course, and he fell to his death

Nothing but facts