Bargain Bin filled with Muses

“Anyone smell BBQ?”

“God, this is unforgiving.”

“I’m coming to haunt you!”

“It was a gift, and I’m cold.”

“Please don’t fight me, dude.”

“I can do this… I can’t do this.”

“No, that’s Jesus on a Moped!”

“They’re just unloading bullets.”

“We actually made it! Oh my god!”

“Why are you so easily spooked?”

“Oh, I’m famous, they all love me.”

“You better be fucking enlightened!” 

“It’s so hard to get anything done…”

“I mean, this even looks suspicious!”

“I was having fun for a few seconds.”

“Why are you constantly kicking me?”

“That’s not chaotic, that’s just nature.”

“I died from the gravity of the situation.”

“It’s not that bad… however, I am stuck.”

“I feel like I bring a lot of chaos, usually.”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you. I’m in the ocean.”

“Hmm, maybe never say that ever again.”

“Beyblades, no. Stop letting it rip, please!”

“We gotta go before that thing falls on us.”

“I actually find it relaxing, so joke’s on you.”

“But, naturally, everyone screwed me over.”

“Stop being drunk! Get a better metabolism!”

“I went to Heaven, its out of their jurisdiction.”

“They’re all so confused. This is great, I love it!”

“This is so stressful all the time, but its so funny.”

“Its not very relaxing when he’s screaming at me!”

“Oh my god, that’s so uncomfortable. Please stop.”

“He was on fire for so long and no one was helping.”

“It’s gonna do something wacky. Completely random.”

“I don’t know what’s going on, please don’t attack me!”

“Oh, I’ve fallen down the stairs. Guess we can’t go biking.”

“And now all the vehicles are Beyblades, get out of my way!”

“This is way less weird than the other stuff that just happened.”

“Are you comfortable giving me a tattoo during an earthquake?”

“Please get into the damn car, because we’re going to blow up.”

“Why are the police after me? I blew up a car in my own house!”

“I think he needs more than yoga. I think its time to call the hospital.”

“We’re gonna be so chaotic, even WE won’t know what we’re doing.”

“I’m having a mid-life crisis. I think I’m having a few at the same time.”

“It has all the bells and whistles. It has everything. You just can’t see it.”

“I thought it was just part of the show, but no, he’s actually here to kill me.”

“That was the hardest part. Not, like, on a moral level. That part was easy.”

“There’s a whale on the roof over there. Property values are gonna plummet.”

“I’ve got a lot going on right now, no time to explain, please give me your car!”

“What ruined it for you? Was it the fact everyone was on fire or was it the dumptruck?”

“They sent killer clowns, James Bond, and mercenaries after me. Like, how deep are your pockets?”

“What future?”

“Was it worth it?“

“I’ll make you proud.“

“She’s lost her mind!“

“There you go! Poetry.“

“I don’t wanna lose you.“

“Mom’s gonna love this…”

“I say we kill them all now.“

“Playing games… are we?“

“Why, you impudent little…!“

“You have… wonderful eyes.”

“That’s all they were; stories.“

“Go ahead! Slice him, dice him!“

“Don’t ever let me do that, again.”

“Now at last, we hear some sense.“

“Okay, okay! You’re both grounded!“

“So, uh, how’d that happen anyway?“

“Mmm! Delightfully tangy, yet robust.“

“But, he knew the risks, as do we all.“

“Yeah. Too bad my nose works just fine.”

“A ludicrous parcel of driveling galoots…”

“Don’t you remember? All those stories?“

“Just a lifelong obsession… I’ll get over it.”

“Hit your head there pretty hard, didn’t ya?“

“I don’t know what to do, I get so flustered.“

“You give up a few things, chasing a dream.“

“We were better off on the exploding planet!”

“Why? You got something to hide, bright-eyes?“

“Oh, shut up. You know I don’t mean a word of it.”

“Oh, don’t be daft. You’ve been very helpful. Truly.“

“Hey, mister? Hey, mister, you’re okay in there, right?“

“I mean, I am a doctor, but I’m not that kind of doctor.“

“I’m fluent in ‘flatula’. Took two years of it in high school.”

“I’m just sorry I couldn’t have been… more helpful to you.“

“I just don’t want to see you throw away your entire future!“

“I gotta find a place to hide, and there’s pirates chasing me.”

“Aw, he took a shine to me. We’ve been together ever since.“

“I really, really, really, really want to go. And it’s the right thing.“

“No. He was more the taking-off-and-never-coming-back sort.“

“Oh, pirates! Don’t get me started on pirates! I don’t like them.“

“With the greatest possible respect… zip your howling screamer.”

“All that talk of greatness? Light coming off my sails? What a joke.“

“Ah, I’ve got some plans… to make people see me a little different.“

“Yes, yes. No, I mean, I understand, but, um, co-couldn’t we just—?“

“You can keep that kind of flim-flammery for your spaceport floozies.”

“Look, if you’re gonna come along, you’re gonna have to stop talking.“

“I don’t know… they weren’t exactly singing my praises when I left home.”

“Oh, I see. Well, I was never much good at games… Always hated to lose.“

“You won’t so much as eat, sleep, or scratch your BUM without my say-so!“

“Without the map we’re dead. If we try to leave we’re dead. If we stay here…“

“You’re as trim and as bonnie as a sloop with new sails and a fresh coat of paint!“

“Are you saying this because it’s the right thing… or because you really wanna go?“

“It’s totally preposterous, traversing the entire galaxy alone… that’s why I’m going with you.”

“Like it or not, I’ll be pounding a few skills into that thick head of yours to keep you out of trouble.”

“They’re… How did I describe them? I said something rather good this morning before coffee.”

“You got the makings of greatness in you, but you got to take the helm and chart your own course!”

“Look at you! Glowing like a solar fire. You’re something special. You’re gonna rattle the stars, you are!”

“He’s a-comin’. Can ya hear ‘im? Those gears and gyros, clickin’ and whirrin’ like the devil, himself!”

“Didn’t your pop ever teach you to pick your fights a bit more carefully? Your father not the teachin’ sort?”

“I know that I keep messing everything up. And I know…that I let you down. But this is my chance to make it up to you.“

“I should never have listened to that pushy two-headed saleswoman… this one said it fit, that one said it was my color…”

“Is it that your body is too massive for your teeny-tiny head, or is it that your head is too teeny-tiny for your big fat body?“

“Look, don’t you get it?! I screwed up! I mean, for two seconds, I thought that maybe I could do something right, but — !”

“Whatever you heard back there, at least the part concerning you, I didn’t mean a word of it. If that bloodthirsty lot thought I had gone soft, they’d have gutted us both.“

“This should be a wonderful opportunity for the two of us to get to know one and other. You know what they say. ‘Familiarity breeds…’, um, well, ‘contempt’. But, in our case…”

“I mean, I am a doctor, but I’m not that kind of doctor. I have a doctorate, it’s not the same thing. You can’t help people with a doctorate. You just sit there and you’re useless!“

‘ are you bleeding? ’

‘ take it easy. you hit your head. ’

‘ where does it hurt? ’ 

‘ sit still and let me take a look! ’

‘ how did you get that black eye? ’ 

‘ you should see the other guy. ’ 

‘ did i say you could get out of bed? ’

‘ that’s going to leave a bruise. ’

‘ i’ll get some ice. ’ 

‘ that’s what you get for picking fights. ’

‘ are you trying to give me a heart attack? ’

‘ what’s wrong with you? ’

‘ you can barely stand. ’

‘ did you throw the first punch? ’

‘ that’s a nasty bump. ’

‘ get in the car. you’re going to the hospital. ’

‘ at least bandage it. ’ 

‘ no, you’ll get an infection. ’ 

‘ wet floor signs are there for a reason, you know. ’

‘ you’re lucky. that icicle could’ve killed you. ’

‘ where’s your gratitude? i rescued you! ’

‘ i’m calling the nurse. ’

‘ was that stupid dare worth it? ’

‘ what happened to you? ’

‘ sit down. i’ll make some hot chocolate and fix you right up. ’

‘ are those bandages? ’

‘ you need stitches. ’

‘ look out for that tree branch. ’

‘ i’ve got you. just stay awake. can you do that for me? ’

‘ lean on me. ’

‘ you got two choices: let me carry you, or die out here. take your pick. ’

‘ shit, you’re burning up. ’  

‘ you’re not dying. it’s only a sprained ankle. ’

‘ lie down. ’

‘ i’m sorry. i know it hurts. here, hold my hand. ’

‘ you’re in no condition to be walking around. ’

‘ wake up! wake up! ’

‘ i don’t feel sorry for you. ’