:)

You ever think about what goes on and youre like teehee yep

Grapefruit be like teriyaki lemon and old 50s housewives said okurrr 😚

When I used to see The Hat Man™️ semi-frequently, I told my mom about it and she went to the spot I saw him and told him to go away and by golly I didn’t see him again for like 3-4 years.

You think the taxes go to fix the roads? What roads? I’ve been stuck in a pothole since April and no government agent has come to help. You know why? Because they’re spending all their money on Pop Tarts. There’s an IRS official named Dennis or Steve or Leonard or some crap purging our dollars away to buy Brown Sugar and Chocolate Chip toaster treats. Pay your dues in cash and they laugh. Pay in pastry and they salute.

Gogurt is to men and yoplait is to women as Danimals crush cups is to ADHD