tomorrow is valentine's day.Â
i wanna tell him i love him but what if i just throw up everywhere instead?

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@b1-24258
tomorrow is valentine's day.Â
i wanna tell him i love him but what if i just throw up everywhere instead?

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i love you il loeve you ill leove you i'll leave you
i wish i were as brave as dabe. if i planned ahead i would have asked him how i could cut my own throat. then he'd miss me soooo much he'd want me back! and then he'd love me until i messed everything up again!
i don't have a best friend anymore. it's so weird to say it. dabe hates me. there, that's better.
i shouldn't have asked jakke i  should have just been happy with what i had i don't know if this is worth it...........

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i hate the phrase suck my dick suck a dick suck his dick. it's such a shitty thing to do why not pick a better word? fellatio comes from fellatus which is latin and is the past participle for the verb fellare which means to give head looks an awful lot like failure and auparishtaka means mouth congress pretty much because all of the important people are too busy getting their dick sucked to do their jobs!
one day he told me he was leaving and he never said why.
not fair not fair not fair not fair. not fair not fair not fair not fair not fair not fair not fair not fair. not fair not fair not fair not fair not fair not fair. not. fair.
sometimes i look and i see this boy lying next to my best friend and he won't let me come back. he won't let me be there for him and he won't even let me talk to him. all he does is fucking take up space and fail and fail and fail and fail and if i could i'd wring his fucking neck
i think it would be best if i were just to die in my sleep.

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sometimes i want to just take someone apart. just...
fuck. give me a scalpel and let me... just. anyone. please.
all those sharp edges are saying cut here and all i want to do is open someone up, that pressure and the give and prettypretty red lines and bones and flesh and deep inside, and cut along a trachea and push back skin until i can see every little ridge tremble as they breathe and scream and scream
- softest hair ever
- all of his half-smiles (maybe if he ever had a full smile that was real)
- he listens to me all. the. time. who even does that???
- dumb hands that need holding
- the way he forgets not to talk with his hands when he's reeeeeeeeeally excited
- skinny arms = best hugs
- his voice when he talks about taking things apart
- his voice at all, actually. but ^that's one of my favorites.
- i wonder how much cooler i'd look if my eyes were that color!
i would give anything to make him see all the great things i see when i see him.
sometimes it feels like a job i have to do, this building him up all the time. and then i realize that i can't afford to get tired, i can't afford to take a break from making sure he's okay because if i don't, who will? and what will happen to him then? and how could i ever live without him?
why did they record us, all the time, anyways?

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rats live on no evil star.
does that mean that they only live on good stars?
how do you define a good star, or an evil star? if we're talking metaphors here, wouldn't it make sense for them to live on evil stars?
apparently i was afraid of blood when i was little, or something? there's a recording of me taking some sort of pencil paper psych test and I got a paper cut, and they had to stop the timer because i wouldn't stop screaming.
meow, meow, meow~
meow, meow, meow, meow~~