MOVED TO VIRGINRULE !

your muse is drinking with mine and has been given the chance to question my muse anything they want to know. some may be triggering, others won’t. send me a 🍻+ the question you want to ask my muse for a tipsy, drunken ( honest ) answer.

“ what’s holding you back in life ?”

“ is everything alright? ”

“ when did you choose to give up ?”

“ what’s the kinkiest thing you have ever done ?”

“ how many have you slept with ?”

“ what’s your biggest secret ?”

“ do you believe in love ?”

“ what’s the meanest thing you have done ?”

“ what scares you more than anything ?”

“ have you ever considered running away ?”

“ do you love me ?”

“ what’s your dirtiest fantasy ?”

“ who hurt you ?”

“ what made you this way ?”

“ is there anyone special in your life ?”

“ why are you always smiling ?”

“ what lie have you told that hurt someone ?”

“ if you could do anything in world, what would it be ?”

“ who are you, really ?”

“ is there anything you regret ?”

“ what’s your biggest regret ?”

“ tell me about your first kiss ?”

“ what is your deepest, darkest fear ?”

“ is there anyone you regret kissing ?”

“ have you ever cheated, or been cheated on ?”

“ what is the most embarrassing thing in your room ?”

“ who have you loved, but they didn’t love you back ?”

“ is there something you have never told anyone ?”

“ when was the last time you cried ?”

“ how come you keep running away ?”

“ have you ever made someone cry ?”

“ if anything, what makes you hate a person ?”

“ what takes for you to fall in love, trust someone ?”

“ do you believe in true love ?”

“ what have you done that people would judge you most for doing ?”

“ do you regret letting me close ?”

“ is there someone you have a crush on ?”

“ what is the strangest place you have ever had sex ?”

“ tell me your most awkward date story ?”

“ do you ever get scared ?”

“ what do you really think of life ?”

“blowjob lessons with the illustrious stu macher, i must be dreaming.” Randy says it a little too emphatically to be a deadpan. “I dunno, Stu. Should I ask Billy for a customer satisfaction rating? I mean, it’s not like he’s leaving Sid for you any time soon.”

Although that sure would be convenient, if Billy suddenly turned into a gay and decided to foist his greasy self into Stu’s waiting arms. But there’s no point daydreaming. He wants to needle further: is that why casey dumped you? But Stu does still have quite a few inches on him and Randy doesn’t want to get wrestled down in the middle of the video store again.

Maybe he will go suck a dick, he thinks petulantly. Just because Stu doesn’t think he’s serious. Nobody can judge the heartbroken on what they do, after all, and Randy definitely qualifies as heartbroken after the amount of times he’s seen Sid smiling at Billy and Billy being stupid and smug back.

“ YOU’D HAFTA ASK SOMEBODY ELSE FOR THAT, BUD. ME AND BILLY ARE NOT – LIKE THAT. ” if his voice gets a little flat when he says this, stu decides to completely ignore it. it’s not like he’s lying – sure, he’s gotten a little handsy with billy, multiple times, but yeah, it never evolved into anything  s e r i o u s ( he wouldn’t mind, nonono, not at all, but shhhh – )

speaking of handsy !! and also deciding it would be great to change the subject a little, they don’t need a stu - billy talk ( anyway, these days it’s aaaall muuuurder, baaaby !! ) – he steps forward and wiggles his fingers, tongue darting across lower lip and teeth; a shark’s smile. “ DON’T CHICKEN OUT ON ME NOW, RAAAAANDY ~ ” 

the last time stu decided it would be funny to tickle Randy during his job, it ended with Randy losing his job for “kicking a customer in the face while screaming obscenities” or some shit like that. He got it back, obviously (there isn’t a high turnover rate at the fuckin’ Woodsboro video store, small businesses are like that, and the owners are pretty forgiving since Randy’s the only one who actually adheres to the filing system) but that’s not the point. So Randy’s already forgotten the way Stu sounded...sad?? when Billy was brought up in favor of his own self-preservation. He squirms, incredibly fucking ticklish, under Stu’s touch and the not-as-uncomfortable-as-it-should-be-feeling of the taller kid’s breath on his ear. “Oh, fuck right off with that,” Randy sputters snaps says in a normal way. “You’re not trying this in the middle of the horror section, you sociopath! I’m working.” 

✫ HORROR + TAGLINES ✫

So, Stu clearly isn’t leaving. On the screen, Sissy Spacek, covered in blood but still extremely hot, is stalking out of her high school. Stu has no concept of personal space, but Randy’s not winning any arguments tonight so he just swats half-heartedly and reaches around to grab his half-finished Coke. “What question.” He’s kind of distracted, because it’s the moment where Carrie almost gets hit by the car and that awesome fucking score plays. “You still want a fuckin’ kiss, amigo?”

“play video games. is that what the kids call it these days?” randy snarks, mostly to himself. he bats stu’s hand away from his face. “WHAT, YOUR MOTHER NEVER TEACH YOU ANY SELF-CONTROL? LISTEN…”

because as annoying as he is, stu sort of looks like a sad, droopy puppy without billy to chase around, and now randy’s feeling guilty. “I’M WATCHING ROCKY HORROR TONIGHT. YOU CAN COME OVER IF YOU WANT, TAKE YOUR MIND OFF OF…THINGS.”

he hadn’t been planning on having a movie night, but stu looks like he needs it. besides, it’s not like randy’s a very busy guy; he mostly only hangs out with one group anyway. “YOU’LL LIKE IT, YOU CAN SEE SUSAN SARANDON’S BREASTS.”

his hand is persistent; doesn’t give up even after being swatted, keeps on trying to pinch randy’s cheek or flick his ear, or whatever. ( as if it has a mind of its’ own !! ) “ THAT’S HOW WE CALL PLAYIN’ VIDEO GAMES, BUDDY. GET YO DIRTY, DIRTY MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER !! ”

that comment though, as small as it is, makes stu weirdly upset. it’s visible on his face for a split second – and then disappears completely at the offer. “ OH, WORD ?? ” stu perks up instantly, spreads his arms as if he’s going for a hug. ( which he might !! ) “ AW, RANDY, THAT IS SO – SO SWEET OF YA !! I’LL BRING LOTSA SNACKS. ”

randy waits for the joke, but stu seems oddly sincere. almost concerning in and of itself; stu isn’t exactly known for his kindness or sensitivity (not that he’s a bad person or anything. he’s just a teenager.) “YOU THINK?” he means it to be sarcastic, hates how stupid hopeful it sounds. tries to change the subject. “BEING SINGLE’S A GOOD LOOK ON YOU, DUDE. YOU’RE ALMOST NICE TODAY.”

he draws his attention back to the shelves. “WHO THE HELL MOVED YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN TO HORROR?” randy hands the vhs over to stu. “TOSS THAT OVER IN SATIRE, WOULD YOU? I SWEAR TO GOD. ORGANIZING THIS PLACE IS GONNA KILL ME. I’M GONNA DIE YOUNG.”