YELLING WITH CAT HOUR

"he is not my president" bumper sticker with a picture of some random guy that has never been president

turn your bath water into piss to unlock kirby

why is this ad so ominous

5 hour onion nugget window of opportunity

*seductively flips leg hair* 

depression meal: dusty glass of lukewarm water that’s been sitting on your dresser for a week

*covers mouth and nose in selfie* ah yes now i’m beautiful 

Being up at 4-5 am is like loading in a level but the textures haven’t loaded all the way through yet.

i like this text post a lot because it’s a comparison between two extremely different styles of humor despite it, effectively, being the same joke

i never thought i’d write the words “deeply evil carpet” but. seriously. what a deeply evil carpet that is.

And what you should do is to put this over an actual trap, like a hole in the floor so people will be like “Oh ha ha ha that’s soooo funny, it’s a rug!” And then fall through it. 

are you satan