idk

Of all things Horikawa would own.

It was only by chance that Kanesada happened upon this notebook. His young doe-eyed companion was out on an emergency expedition, and having been sent in a hurry, he had no time to tidy up his sleeping place, apologizing with embarrassment to Kanesada who offered to do it for him. They shared a room, after all. And it wasn't all that bad, looking after him if it meant Horikawa was getting to explore the world and come closer to him in skill level. Besides, it wasn't every day that he could do that. Horikawa was neat and organized, if a bit overbearing, so the chance to act like a responsible mentor was quite rare.

As he was applying the finishing touches to the room, a rough sensation of paper inside a pillow startles him. Old battle records, perhaps? He thinks to himself, sitting down as he pulls the little makeshift notebook from inside, prepared to read them and judge his abilities, smiling at how cute Horikawa was, always so dedicated. He wouldn't mind Kanesada going through his notes, right? He'd thank him later, probably. Come to think of it, Horikawa was a bit mysterious about himself, as every other word coming out of his mouth was simply 'Kane-san', and he rarely talked about his own affairs and aspirations-- which is why the title of the notebook, which was only the word "Diary" was somehow enticing.

"Last night I had a dream Kane-san was angry at me and decided to punish me. He held me face down against the tatami, naked, my wrists held tightly inside his grip and his weight over my own, the heat of his body passing on to me from his chest to my back. "

...

Well, these are definitely not battle records.

"I feel his breath in my ear, and his cold voice makes me shiver. He asks if I know what I did, to which I reply no, and then I feel it; his cock, which was already inside me, thrusts forward in one single sharp move, and I moan loud enough it echoes into the room. It hits me somewhere that causes a lot of pleasure, and I rake my nails down the tatami, trying to regain some sort of control, but it's useless. Kane-san is strong, and although I know he's doing this to make me reflect on my actions, I have no idea what I did. He seems to be having fun, and although I feel overpowered, I'm actually enjoying myself. I can't help but wonder if this is some sort of roleplay between us?

He doesn't move inside me again after that one time. I plead for him to tell me what I did, please, that I have no idea. That I don't remember doing anything wrong, yet my voice is misty and as full of pleasure as my flushed face reveals, my thighs moving restlessly to coerce him into pushing inside me again. He knows what I want, but he seems to want me to beg. I can hear a hushed laugh leave his lips, and he reads my mind. You should be more honest about what you want, he says, letting go of one of my wrists to move his hand down to my stomach, sliding it further down between my legs and circling it around my dick, stroking it lightly from the base to the tip. I gasp, close my eyes shut, and swallow.

Please, I say, please-- Kane-san... But he keeps touching me gently, sliding outside of me little by little until he's almost completely out, making me suffer with the watered down pleasure he's offering me. If I really did do something wrong, I regret it, I do! But if it's true and I did wrong him, I'm in no position to beg for anything better, in fact I should be grateful I'm getting this much. I whimper, disappointed and frustrated, and he laughs sweetly again. You're so honest, Horikawa-kun, he says, suddenly tightening the hold around my cock and stroking it somewhat faster. I'm panting, happy to be getting some sort of relief, but I still want it. I want him inside me again. I don't dare say it, but I'm thinking of it.

Is this what you wanted, Horikawa-kun? He asks. I'm too weak to reply, and I also don't want to lie to him, so I don't. I see, he adds, suddenly letting go of my other wrist and lifting his chest off my back. I can finally breathe properly, but it doesn't last long. I try to turn my head a little better to look at him, confused, but as I'm starting to do so I feel a quick, sharp yank at my hair, a grip so close to my roots it hurts more than I can describe. I was so focused on the pain (and confused at the subsequent rush of pleasure it brought) that I barely noticed my own voice as it yelped, my own mouth hanging open as I took in a shaky breath, and even more surprising, I fail to notice he had tugged me half way up with one harsh motion. My chest was no longer pressed against the tatami, it was now in mid-air, and with his other hand he settles me properly over his lap. I can't fight it, my mind is too far gone. I can't see his face as my back is still against him, but I feel his dick hard between my legs, pressing softly against my ass. It's wet and sticky, and I want it. I want it so badly I'm salivating. One of my hands moves back on instinct, trying to touch him, trying to reach over to him blindly. I try to say his name, too, but it's barely anything understandable. Babbling. I use my other hand to reach between my legs and touch his dick, stroking it only as a result of me trying to put it inside myself like an idiot. His grip on my hair must be messing up my brain.

What a lewd brat you are, he says mockingly- which I know he'd never, ever, ever really say! But in my fantasy it turns me on, and I agree with an unidentifiable noise. At that time, the grip on my hair softens, and I see his hand in front of me, reaching down, stroking my dick just once before he reaches for his own instead. I eagerly raise my hips a little to let him position his cock better, and before I know it he's sliding me back down on it. It's slow the first time, but I still sigh with relief at getting what I wanted. His hands move over to my arms, around my elbows, and he starts thrusting into me at a considerable pace. My voice is loud, louder whenever he manages to press it deep where I like it the most. I call his name-- once, twice, thrice, I say some other things, other expressions, my jaw hanging open most of the time, and I feel my saliva trickle down because of it. I feel dirty and blissful at the same time, more so when he lets go of my arms to hold down my hips instead, pushing in me even faster as his climax approaches. I move one hand back to hold onto him however I can while I reach for my own dick to stroke it quickly, too. A few seconds later I'm unable to resist any longer and I come on my hand, messy and unhinged, my gasps mixed in with my hot breath as I ride the last of my orgasm off. He slows down when he notices, and I hear him click his tongue. Kane-san is irritated that I came before him, and so he stops moving altogether.

So you've become this kind of selfish kid, haven't you? He says darkly. My mind is still trying to recuperate, but he gives me no time for that. I'll have to teach you how to respect me properly-- is the last thing I hear him say in my muddy memory. In a second my body is pushed back down again, but I manage to avoid hitting my head by using my arms as a cushion. I feel my hips being pulled up, and then his cock sliding up and down my ass as he tries to find where to push it in. He finds it quickly, and I whimper again, lowering my head to quiet down my voice. My eyes are cloudy, but his cock is hitting inside me again, so hard and fast I have no time to properly say his name at all, even though I try over and over again. He's rough, and I'm enjoying it, his nails are long and bury on the soft flesh of my hips, and yet I can't get enough. Fuck me harder, Kane-san! Harder, harder! ...Is what dream me was thinking, in any case.

a few fast thrusts later his voice starts to come out in short grunts and gasps, the sound of our bodies meeting together at that shameful pace and my lustful cries filling the silence. Then with one particular hard push he gets himself all the way in, as deep as he can, coming inside of me. his hot seed released in hot but short bursts. It doesn't take me long to come again myself with the aid of my hand, completely in love with the sensation of his semen trickling down my body. I wish I had seen his face at least once, I think as I pant in ecstasy. I want him to kiss me. I want this Kane-san to kiss me... I wake up, realizing I was stroking myself in my sleep."

Oh...

Oh, my.

Page flip.

"It happened again. I'm embarrassed to admit it. I don't know what brings this kind of dream forward, but I hope I get sent on an expedition today so I can avoid seeing him for the rest of the afternoon. I don't know how I'm supposed to face someone I gave oral sex to in a dream without it being painfully obvious, or how am I supposed to spend the day without me admitting it out of guilt. I can't control what my mind thinks in its sleep, and I know Kane-san would understand if I explained it, but I... I don't want to. I really don't want to tell him. Forgive me, Kane-san, forgive me for having such lewd thoughts about you!

This time again my fantasy had no real beginning or explanation. Kane-san was on his back, most of his clothes still on, and he looked a little injured. I still had all my clothes on, but my head was between his thighs, and I was resting on my elbows. My fingers were wrapped around his cock, and I was stroking him gently up and down with one hand while keeping it in place with my other. I asked if he was feeling better, to which he replied with something along the lines of me being able to do more than this. My face was red, embarrassed at his suggestion, but I also didn't want to disappoint Kane-san. I took a deep breath, tilting my head and pressing my tongue against the slit at the tip of his cock. I give it a few licks, taking in the taste, letting it fill my senses and eventually honing the courage to wrap my lips around the head and suck on it carefully. I saw Kane-san close his eyes slowly with a sigh, a hand reaching up to pet my hair. I knew then I was doing a good job, so I took him in a little more, focusing on the strength of suction at first instead of how much I could fit inside me, as I knew I was still inexperienced on that area.

But then I somehow realized it was a dream, although I didn't fully wake up, and dream me decided I could do whatever if I really wanted it. So I took his dick out of my mouth, panting. I'll do my best, Kane-san, I said cheerfully with newfound conviction before sticking out my tongue and pushing the tip of it back onto his slit. I let my tongue press hard and slide down the shaft as I held his cock tightly in place with my hands, licking thoroughly around and under the head, feeling it enter my open mouth wetly, then I closed my lips around it, the rich smell again in my mouth.

I closed my eyes tightly and start bobbing softly over it. his cock was so hard, it made me happy to know I got him like this. I sucked on it with quiet moans, and on occasion I'd hear him make low noises of pleasure. My saliva is coating his cock richly now, and I think about how good it would be to have this tasty part of Kane-san inside of me. The way it hits the back of my throat is getting me aroused, making me think of how it would feel inside my other hole, all slick and hard against my walls, pushing deep, deep into that part I really like. I'm trying to take him deeper in with my mouth as I fantasize about that, but dream me is sticking to reality way too much, not letting me fully do what I want, even if it would be impossible for the real me. Thankfully, dream Kane-san is different than normal Kane-san as well, and as I agonize over my poor sucking skills, I feel the hand that was petting my head hold a fistful of hair and yank me up and away from his cock instead (I wonder if I have a thing for this? Not the first time it happens and all). By now I'm panting again, a thick, long string of saliva and precum separating my mouth from his cock. I stutter, but I manage to ask quietly, what's wrong, Kane-san? Did I do something wrong? My hands are still stroking him, and I can feel the wetness of my handiwork trickle down to my fingers in thin streams. My eyes are meeting his now. He looks serious. Turned on. Stop holding back, I said you could do better, didn't I? He asks with a somewhat evil smile on his face. I feel... used, but I don't dislike it. In fact it's a little arousing. Something might be wrong with me, in retrospect, but I'll ponder about that at another time.

I try to smile back, nodding in agreement. Yes, Kane-san! I'll do my best! Please give me another chance! He lets go of my hair, petting it back in place to allow me to resume what I was doing. I eagerly put him back in my mouth, sucking and taking him deeper. I wish he'd keep his hand over me, I wish it so much. I try to force the dream into making it happen, and I think I manage it, but I can't exactly remember. I do remember my pace getting faster, the sensation of his cock hitting my throat, and his voice through gritted teeth as he called my name just once. That was enough encouragement for me to suck him harder, harder, until he throws his head back and his breath hitches, pushing down on my head on reflex to keep me there as he comes, the suddenness making me flinch but his hold not letting me lift my head. I yelp, but calm down immediately. Instead I try to focus on the taste of what feels like as much as a teaspoon of cum inside my mouth, slowly sliding his dick out of my mouth once his hand isn't pressing that hard on me. His seed stays in my mouth as I figure out what to do with it, but it's obvious. I swallow what I can, not wanting to lose even a drop of Kane-san. Some of the hot liquid stays on my lips, and on my stupor I touch my mouth with my middle digit, looking at the crystalline white color of his cum, then without a second thought I lick it off my finger, from the bottom up, eyes closed. Kane-san calls me a pervert again, but I barely manage to listen to it. I'm about to wake up, I can feel it. and sure enough, within the next few seconds--"

Bang. The sound of the main door opening startles Kanesada away from the notebook and nearly gives him a heart attack. The troops returned from their expedition, judging from their voices, and they'll be back at the sleeping quarters in any moment. Kanesada's thoughts are still a mess, and only now he notices he had his hand where it shouldn't have been on his body. Standing up in a flash, he straitens himself, fixing the pillow in place and putting the notebook back where it was found.