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do what makes you truly fucking happy

are you ever in a moment and think damn i’m really gonna miss this

there is so much hurt and sadness inside of me and i have no idea how to control it anymore

sometimes it just hurts and there is nothing you can do about it

actually i love growing older and learning how i work as a person like realizing what kinds of fabrics feel best on my skin or what brand of yogurt i like best or how I want to be touched. watching myself change, enjoying brussel sprouts when I used to hate them as a child, understanding why I got angry in that one conversation 10 years ago… there are so many mysteries inside me that i have yet to unravel and there will always be more and sometimes i think maybe its all worth it