Im so desperate, desperate for peace, for calmness, for my mind to be rested. I want everything to be over, it seems unbearable. Im weighted by the heaviness of my soul. I no longer carry it with me. Each morning i wake up i put my heart aside, i tell it you should rest. The day is long and I can collapse any soon. I hope for million of possibilities but the one im living. I long for everything and anything that would take me away. I’m so ready to give up everything, but then again I’m not. I’m so heavy and I feel like im sinking into slow death, death would be merciful. I’m not meant to be treated delicately. I tell that to myself and we both believe it. Im so heavy i could drown into my bed sheets. I’m so heavy I can’t lift my eyelids. Someone told me I’m a sad soul, pathetic. My heart is heavy, it’s breaking my ribs. I cannot breath.

Sleepy eyes, heavy heart with busy mind.